第 17 节
作者:
天净沙 更新:2022-05-01 22:41 字数:9321
that I only could supply; and apprehending Bradford might engage me and
get the jobb from him; sent me a very civil message; that old friends
should not part for a few words; the effect of sudden passion; and wishing
me to return。 Meredith persuaded me to comply; as it would give more
opportunity for his improvement under my daily instructions; so I return'd;
and we went on more smoothly than for some time before。 The New jersey
jobb was obtain'd; I contriv'd a copperplate press for it; the first that had
been seen in the country; I cut several ornaments and checks for the bills。
We went together to Burlington; where I executed the whole to satisfaction;
and he received so large a sum for the work as to be enabled thereby to
keep his head much longer above water。
At Burlington I made an acquaintance with many principal people of
the province。 Several of them had been appointed by the Assembly a
committee to attend the press; and take care that no more bills were
printed than the law directed。 They were therefore; by turns; constantly
with us; and generally he who attended; brought with him a friend or two
for company。 My mind having been much more improv'd by reading than
Keimer's; I suppose it was for that reason my conversation seem'd to he
more valu'd。 They had me to their houses; introduced me to their friends;
and show'd me much civility; while he; tho' the master; was a little
neglected。 In truth; he was an odd fish; ignorant of common life; fond of
rudely opposing receiv'd opinions; slovenly to extream dirtiness;
enthusiastic in some points of religion; and a little knavish withal。
We continu'd there near three months; and by that time I could reckon
among my acquired friends; Judge Allen; Samuel Bustill; the secretary of
the Province; Isaac Pearson; Joseph Cooper; and several of the Smiths;
members of Assembly; and Isaac Decow; the surveyor…general。 The latter
was a shrewd; sagacious old man; who told me that he began for himself;
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when young; by wheeling clay for the brick…makers; learned to write after
be was of age; carri'd the chain for surveyors; who taught him surveying;
and he had now by his industry; acquir'd a good estate; and says he; 〃I
foresee that you will soon work this man out of business; and make a
fortune in it at Philadelphia。〃 He had not then the least intimation of my
intention to set up there or anywhere。 These friends were afterwards of
great use to me; as I occasionally was to some of them。 They all continued
their regard for me as long as they lived。
Before I enter upon my public appearance in business; it may be well
to let you know the then state of my mind with regard to my principles and
morals; that you may see how far those influenc'd the future events of my
life。 My parents had early given me religious impressions; and brought me
through my childhood piously in the Dissenting way。 But I was scarce
fifteen; when; after doubting by turns of several points; as I found them
disputed in the different books I read; I began to doubt of Revelation itself。
Some books against Deism fell into my hands; they were said to be the
substance of sermons preached at Boyle's Lectures。 It happened that they
wrought an effect on me quite contrary to what was intended by them; for
the arguments of the Deists; which were quoted to be refuted; appeared to
me much stronger than the refutations; in short; I soon became a thorough
Deist。 My arguments perverted some others; particularly Collins and
Ralph; but; each of them having afterwards wrong'd me greatly without
the least compunction; and recollecting Keith's conduct towards me (who
was another freethinker); and my own towards Vernon and Miss Read;
which at times gave me great trouble; I began to suspect that this doctrine;
tho' it might be true; was not very useful。 My London pamphlet; which
had for its motto these lines of Dryden:
〃Whatever is; is right。 Though purblind man Sees but a part o' the
chain; the nearest link: His eyes not carrying to the equal beam; That
poises all above;〃
and from the attributes of God; his infinite wisdom; goodness and
power; concluded that nothing could possibly be wrong in the world; and
that vice and virtue were empty distinctions; no such things existing;
appear'd now not so clever a performance as I once thought it; and I
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doubted whether some error had not insinuated itself unperceiv'd into my
argument; so as to infect all that follow'd; as is common in metaphysical
reasonings。
I grew convinc'd that truth; sincerity and integrity in dealings between
man and man were of the utmost importance to the felicity of life; and I
form'd written resolutions; which still remain in my journal book; to
practice them ever while I lived。 Revelation had indeed no weight with me;
as such; but I entertain'd an opinion that; though certain actions might not
be bad because they were forbidden by it; or good because it commanded
them; yet probably these actions might be forbidden because they were
bad for us; or commanded because they were beneficial to us; in their own
natures; all the circumstances of things considered。 And this persuasion;
with the kind hand of Providence; or some guardian angel; or accidental
favorable circumstances and situations; or all together; preserved me; thro'
this dangerous time of youth; and the hazardous situations I was
sometimes in among strangers; remote from the eye and advice of my
father; without any willful gross immorality or injustice; that might have
been expected from my want of religion。 I say willful; because the
instances I have mentioned had something of necessity in them; from my
youth; inexperience; and the knavery of others。 I had therefore a tolerable
character to begin the world with; I valued it properly; and determin'd to
preserve it。
We had not been long return'd to Philadelphia before the new types
arriv'd from London。 We settled with Keimer; and left him by his consent
before he heard of it。 We found a house to hire near the market; and took it。
To lessen the rent; which was then but twenty…four pounds a year; tho' I
have since known it to let for seventy; we took in Thomas Godfrey; a
glazier; and his family; who were to pay a considerable part of it to us; and
we to board with them。 We had scarce opened our letters and put our press
in order; before George House; an acquaintance of mine; brought a
countryman to us; whom he had met in the street inquiring for a printer。
All our cash was now expended in the variety of particulars we had been
obliged to procure; and this countryman's five shillings; being our first…
fruits; and coming so seasonably; gave me more pleasure than any crown I
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have since earned; and the gratitude I felt toward House has made me
often more ready than perhaps I should otherwise have been to assist
young beginners。
There are croakers in every country; always boding its ruin。 Such a one
then lived in Philadelphia; a person of note; an elderly man; with a wise
look and a very grave manner of speaking; his name was Samuel Mickle。
This gentleman; a stranger to me; stopt one day at my door; and asked me
if I was the young man who had lately opened a new printing…house。
Being answered in the affirmative; he said he was sorry for me; because it
was an expensive undertaking; and the expense would be lost; for
Philadelphia was a sinking place; the people already half…bankrupts; or
near being so; all appearances to the contrary; such as new buildings and
the rise of rents; being to his certain knowledge fallacious; for they were;
in fact; among the things