第 16 节
作者:
寻找山吹 更新:2022-04-27 10:15 字数:9322
me! God; deliver me! Let me be free! Is there any
God? Why am I a slave? I will run away。 I will not
stand it。 Get caught; or get clear; I'll try it。 I had
as well die with ague as the fever。 I have only one
life to lose。 I had as well be killed running as die
standing。 Only think of it; one hundred miles
straight north; and I am free! Try it? Yes! God
helping me; I will。 It cannot be that I shall live
and die a slave。 I will take to the water。 This very
bay shall yet bear me into freedom。 The steam…
boats steered in a north…east course from North
Point。 I will do the same; and when I get to the
head of the bay; I will turn my canoe adrift; and
walk straight through Delaware into Pennsylvania。
When I get there; I shall not be required to have a
pass; I can travel without being disturbed。 Let but
the first opportunity offer; and; come what will; I
am off。 Meanwhile; I will try to bear up under the
yoke。 I am not the only slave in the world。 Why
should I fret? I can bear as much as any of them。
Besides; I am but a boy; and all boys are bound to
some one。 It may be that my misery in slavery will
only increase my happiness when I get free。 There
is a better day coming。〃
Thus I used to think; and thus I used to speak
to myself; goaded almost to madness at one mo…
ment; and at the next reconciling myself to my
wretched lot。
I have already intimated that my condition was
much worse; during the first six months of my stay
at Mr。 Covey's; than in the last six。 The circum…
stances leading to the change in Mr。 Covey's course
toward me form an epoch in my humble history。
You have seen how a man was made a slave; you
shall see how a slave was made a man。 On one of
the hottest days of the month of August; 1833; Bill
Smith; William Hughes; a slave named Eli; and
myself; were engaged in fanning wheat。 Hughes was
clearing the fanned wheat from before the fan。 Eli
was turning; Smith was feeding; and I was carrying
wheat to the fan。 The work was simple; requiring
strength rather than intellect; yet; to one entirely
unused to such work; it came very hard。 About three
o'clock of that day; I broke down; my strength failed
me; I was seized with a violent aching of the head;
attended with extreme dizziness; I trembled in every
limb。 Finding what was coming; I nerved myself
up; feeling it would never do to stop work。 I stood
as long as I could stagger to the hopper with grain。
When I could stand no longer; I fell; and felt as
if held down by an immense weight。 The fan of
course stopped; every one had his own work to do;
and no one could do the work of the other; and
have his own go on at the same time。
Mr。 Covey was at the house; about one hundred
yards from the treading…yard where we were fanning。
On hearing the fan stop; he left immediately; and
came to the spot where we were。 He hastily in…
quired what the matter was。 Bill answered that I
was sick; and there was no one to bring wheat to the
fan。 I had by this time crawled away under the
side of the post and rail…fence by which the yard
was enclosed; hoping to find relief by getting out
of the sun。 He then asked where I was。 He was
told by one of the hands。 He came to the spot; and;
after looking at me awhile; asked me what was
the matter。 I told him as well as I could; for I scarce
had strength to speak。 He then gave me a savage
kick in the side; and told me to get up。 I tried to
do so; but fell back in the attempt。 He gave me
another kick; and again told me to rise。 I again
tried; and succeeded in gaining my feet; but; stoop…
ing to get the tub with which I was feeding the
fan; I again staggered and fell。 While down in this
situation; Mr。 Covey took up the hickory slat with
which Hughes had been striking off the half…bushel
measure; and with it gave me a heavy blow upon
the head; making a large wound; and the blood ran
freely; and with this again told me to get up。 I made
no effort to comply; having now made up my mind
to let him do his worst。 In a short time after re…
ceiving this blow; my head grew better。 Mr。 Covey
had now left me to my fate。 At this moment I re…
solved; for the first time; to go to my master; enter
a complaint; and ask his protection。 In order to do
this; I must that afternoon walk seven miles; and
this; under the circumstances; was truly a severe
undertaking。 I was exceedingly feeble; made so as
much by the kicks and blows which I received; as
by the severe fit of sickness to which I had been
subjected。 I; however; watched my chance; while
Covey was looking in an opposite direction; and
started for St。 Michael's。 I succeeded in getting a
considerable distance on my way to the woods; when
Covey discovered me; and called after me to come
back; threatening what he would do if I did not
come。 I disregarded both his calls and his threats;
and made my way to the woods as fast as my feeble
state would allow; and thinking I might be over…
hauled by him if I kept the road; I walked through
the woods; keeping far enough from the road to
avoid detection; and near enough to prevent losing
my way。 I had not gone far before my little strength
again failed me。 I could go no farther。 I fell down;
and lay for a considerable time。 The blood was yet
oozing from the wound on my head。 For a time I
thought I should bleed to death; and think now that
I should have done so; but that the blood so matted
my hair as to stop the wound。 After lying there
about three quarters of an hour; I nerved myself
up again; and started on my way; through bogs and
briers; barefooted and bareheaded; tearing my feet
sometimes at nearly every step; and after a journey
of about seven miles; occupying some five hours to
perform it; I arrived at master's store。 I then pre…
sented an appearance enough to affect any but a
heart of iron。 From the crown of my head to my
feet; I was covered with blood。 My hair was all
clotted with dust and blood; my shirt was stiff with
blood。 I suppose I looked like a man who had es…
caped a den of wild beasts; and barely escaped them。
In this state I appeared before my master; humbly
entreating him to interpose his authority for my
protection。 I told him all the circumstances as well
as I could; and it seemed; as I spoke; at times to
affect him。 He would then walk the floor; and seek
to justify Covey by saying he expected I deserved
it。 He asked me what I wanted。 I told him; to let
me get a new home; that as sure as I lived with Mr。
Covey again; I should live with but to die with
him; that Covey would surely kill me; he was in a
fair way for it。 Master Thomas ridiculed the idea
that there was any danger of Mr。 Covey's killing
me; and said that he knew Mr。 Covey; that he was
a good man; and that he could not think of taking
me from him; that; should he do so; he would lose
the whole year's wages; that I belonged to Mr。 Covey
for one year; and that I must go back to him; come
what might; and that I must not trouble him with
any more stories; or that he would himself GET HOLD
OF ME。 After threatening me thus; he gave me a very
large dose of salts; telling me that I might remain
in St。 Michael's that night; (it being quite late;)
but that I must be off back to Mr。 Covey's early
in the morning; and that if I did not; he would
~get hold of me;~ which meant that he would whip
me。 I remained all night; and; according to his or…
ders; I started off to Covey's in the morning; (Sat…
urday morning;) wearied in body and broken in
spirit。 I got no supper that night; or breakfast that
morning。 I reached Covey's about nine o'clock; and
just as I was getting over the fence that divided
Mrs。 Kemp's fields from ours; out ran Covey with
his cowskin; to give me another whipping。 Before
he could reach me; I succeeded in getting to the
cornfield; and as the corn was very high; it afforded
me the means of hiding。 He seemed very angry; and
searched for me a long time。 My behavior was al…
together unaccountable。 He finally gave up the
chase; thinking; I suppose; that I must come home
for something to eat; he would give himself no fur…
ther trouble in looking for me。 I spent that day
mostly in the woods; having the alternative before
me;to go home and be whipped to death; or stay
in the woods and be starved to death。 That night;
I fell in with Sandy Jenkins; a slave with whom
I was somewhat acquainted。 Sandy had a free wife
who lived about four miles from Mr。 Covey's; and
it being Saturday; he was on his way to see her。 I
told him my circumstances; and he very kindly in…
vited me to go home with him。 I went home with
him; and talked this whole matter over; and got his
advice as to what course it was best for me to pursue。
I found Sandy an old adviser。 He told me; with
great solemnity; I must go back to Covey; but