第 16 节
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Jane Austen: Persuasion 65
very much wished him to meet Captain Wentworth; and there
being no sufficient reason against it; he ought to go; and it ended
in his making a bold; public declaration; when he came in from
shooting; of his meaning to dress directly; and dine at the other
house。
“Nothing can be going on better than the child;” said he; “so I
told my father; just now; that I would come; and he thought me
quite right。 Your sister being with you; my love; I have no scruple
at all。 You would not like to leave him yourself; but you see I can
be of no use。 Anne will send for me if anything is the matter。”
Husbands and wives generally understand when opposition will
be vain。 Mary knew; from Charles’s manner of speaking; that he
was quite determined on going; and that it would be of no use to
teaze him。 She said nothing; therefore; till he was out of the room;
but as soon as there was only Anne to hear;
“So you and I are to be left to shift by ourselves; with this poor
sick child—and not a creature coming near us all the evening! I
knew how it would be。 This is always my luck。 If there is anything
disagreeable going on men are always sure to get out of it; and
Charles is as bad as any of them。 Very unfeeling! I must say it is
very unfeeling of him to be running away from his poor little boy。
Talks of his being going on so well! How does he know that he is
going on well; or that there may not be a sudden change half an
hour hence? I did not think Charles would have been so unfeeling。
So here he is to go away and enjoy himself; and because I am the
poor mother; I am not to be allowed to stir;—and yet; I am sure; I
am more unfit than anybody else to be about the child。 My being
the mother is the very reason why my feelings should not be tried。
I am not at all equal to it。 You saw how hysterical I was yesterday。”
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“But that was only the effect of the suddenness of your alarm—
of the shock。 You will not be hysterical again。 I dare say we shall
have nothing to distress us。 I perfectly understand Mr。 Robinson’s
directions; and have no fears; and indeed; Mary; I cannot wonder
at your husband。 Nursing does not belong to a man; it is not his
province。 A sick child is always the mother’s property; her own
feelings generally make it so。”
“I hope I am as fond of my child as any mother—but I do not
know that I am of any more use in the sick…room than Charles; for
I cannot be always scolding and teazing the poor child when it is
ill; and you saw; this morning; that if I told him to keep quiet; he
was sure to begin kicking about。 I have not nerves for the sort of
thing。”
“But; could you be comfortable yourself; to be spending the
whole evening away from the poor boy?”
“Yes; you see his papa can; and why should not I?—Jemima is
so careful; and she could send us word every hour how he was。 I
really think Charles might as well have told his father we would all
come。 I am not more alarmed about little Charles now than he is。 I
was dreadfully alarmed yesterday; but the case is very different to…
day。”
“Well—if you do not think it too late to give notice for yourself;
suppose you were to go; as well as your husband。 Leave little
Charles to my care。 Mr。 and Mrs。 Musgrove cannot think it wrong
while I remain with him。”
“Are you serious?” cried Mary; her eyes brightening。 “Dear me!
that’s a very good thought; very good; indeed。 To be sure; I may
just as well go as not; for I am of no use at home—am I? and it only
harasses me。 You; who have not a mother’s feelings; are a great
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deal the properest person。 You can make little Charles do
anything; he always minds you at a word。 It will be a great deal
better than leaving him only with Jemima。 Oh! I shall certainly go;
I am sure I ought if I can; quite as much as Charles; for they want
me excessively to be acquainted with Captain Wentworth; and I
know you do not mind being left alone。 An excellent thought of
yours; indeed; Anne。 I will go and tell Charles; and get ready
directly。 You can send for us; you know; at a moment’s notice; if
anything is the matter; but I dare say there will be nothing to
alarm you。 I should not go; you may be sure; if I did not feel quite
at ease about my dear child。”
The next moment she was tapping at her husband’s dressing…
room door; and as Anne followed her up stairs; she was in time for
the whole conversation; which began with Mary’s saying; in a tone
of great exultation;
“I mean to go with you; Charles; for I am of no more use at
home than you are。 If I were to shut myself up for ever with the
child; I should not be able to persuade him to do anything he did
not like。 Anne will stay; Anne undertakes to stay at home and take
care of him。 It is Anne’s own proposal; and so I shall go with you;
which will be a great deal better; for I have not dined at the other
house since Tuesday。”
“This is very kind of Anne;” was her husband’s answer; “and I
should be very glad to have you go; but it seems rather hard that
she should be left at home by herself; to nurse our sick child。”
Anne was now at hand to take up her own cause; and the
sincerity of her manner being soon sufficient to convince him;
where conviction was at least very agreeable; he had no farther
scruples as to her being left to dine alone; though he still wanted
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her to join them in the evening; when the child might be at rest for
the night; and kindly urged her to let him come and fetch her; but
she was quite unpersuadable; and this being the case; she had ere
long the pleasure of seeing them set off together in high spirits。
They were gone; she hoped; to be happy; however oddly
constructed such happiness might seem; as for herself; she was
left with as many sensations of comfort; as were; perhaps; ever
likely to be hers。 She knew herself to be of the first utility to the
child; and what was it to her if Frederick Wentworth were only
half a mile distant; making himself agreeable to others?
She would have liked to know how he felt as to a meeting。
Perhaps indifferent; if indifference could exist under such
circumstances。 He must be either indifferent or unwilling。 Had he
wished ever to see her again; he need not have waited till this
time; he would have done what she could not but believe that in
his place she should have done long ago; when events had been
early giving him the independence which alone had been wanting。
Her brother and sister came back delighted with their new
acquaintance; and their visit in general。 There had been music;
singing; talking; laughing; all that was most agreeable; charming
manners in Captain Wentworth; no shyness or reserve; they
seemed all to know each other perfectly; and he was coming the
very next morning to shoot with Charles。 He was to come to
breakfast; but not at the Cottage; though that had been proposed
at first; but then he had been pressed to come to the Great House
instead; and he seemed afraid of being in Mrs。 Charles Musgrove’s
way; on account of the child; and therefore; somehow; they hardly
knew how; it ended in Charles’s being to meet him to breakfast at
his father’s。
Cla