第 23 节
作者:
吹嘻 更新:2021-11-05 20:37 字数:9322
soul but what he acknowledged the sovereign necessity of prayer。
In my awe; in my rapture; all my thoughts seemed enlarged and
illumed and exalted。 I prayedall my soul seemed one prayer。 All
my past; with its pride and presumption and folly; grew distinct as
the form of a penitent; kneeling for pardon before setting forth on
the pilgrimage vowed to a shrine。 And; sure now; in the deeps of a
soul first revealed to myself; that the Dead do not die forever; my
human love soared beyond its brief trial of terror and sorrow。
Daring not to ask from Heaven's wisdom that Lilian; for my sake;
might not yet pass away from the earth; I prayed that my soul might
be fitted to bear with submission whatever my Maker might ordain。
And if surviving herwithout whom no beam from yon material sun
could ever warm into joy a morrow in human lifeso to guide my
steps that they might rejoin her at last; and in rejoining; regain
forever!
How trivial now became the weird riddle; that; a little while
before; had been clothed in so solemn an awe! What mattered it to
the vast interests involved in the clear recognition of Soul and
Hereafter; whether or not my bodily sense; for a moment; obscured
the face of the Nature I should one day behold as a spirit?
Doubtless the sights and the sounds which had haunted the last
gloomy night; the calm reason of Faber would strip of their magical
seemings; the Eyes in the space and the Foot in the circle might be
those of no terrible Demons; but of the wild's savage children whom
I had seen; halting; curious and mute; in the light of the morning。
The tremor of the ground (if not; as heretofore; explicable by the
illusory impression of my own treacherous senses) might be but the
natural effect of elements struggling yet under a soil unmistakably
charred by volcanoes。 The luminous atoms dissolved in the caldron
might as little be fraught with a vital elixir as are the splendors
of naphtha or phosphor。 As it was; the weird rite had no magic
result。 The magician was not rent limb from limb by the fiends。
By causes as natural as ever extinguished life's spark in the frail
lamp of clay; he had died out of sightunder the black veil。
What mattered henceforth to Faith; in its far grander questions and
answers; whether Reason; in Faber; or Fancy; in me; supplied the
more probable guess at a hieroglyph which; if construed aright; was
but a word of small mark in the mystical language of Nature? If
all the arts of enchantment recorded by Fable were attested by
facts which Sages were forced to acknowledge; Sages would sooner or
later find some cause for such portentsnot supernatural。 But
what Sage; without cause supernatural; both without and within him;
can guess at the wonders he views in the growth of a blade of
grass; or the tints on an insect's wing? Whatever art Man can
achieve in his progress through time; Man's reason; in time; can
suffice to explain。 But the wonders of God? These belong to the
Infinite; and these; O Immortal! will but develop new wonder on
wonder; though thy sight be a spirit's; and thy leisure to track
and to solve an eternity。
As I raised my face from my clasped hands; my eyes fell full upon a
form standing in the open doorway。 There; where on the night in
which Lilian's long struggle for reason and life had begun; the
Luminous Shadow had been beheld in the doubtful light of a dying
moon and a yet hazy dawn; there; on the threshold; gathering round
her bright locks the aureole of the glorious sun; stood Amy; the
blessed child! And as I gazed; drawing nearer and nearer to the
silenced house; and that Image of Peace on its threshold; I felt
that Hope met me at the doorHope in the child's steadfast eyes;
Hope in the child's welcoming smile!
〃I was at watch for you;〃 whispered Amy。 〃All is well。〃
〃She lives stillshe lives! Thank God; thank God!〃
〃She livesshe will recover!〃 said another voice; as my head sunk
on Faber's shoulder。 〃For some hours in the night her sleep was
disturbed; convulsed。 I feared; then; the worst。 Suddenly; just
before the dawn; she called out aloud; still in sleep:
〃'The cold and dark shadow has passed away from me and from Allen
passed away from us both forever!'
〃And from that moment the fever left her; the breathing became
soft; the pulse steady; and the color stole gradually back to her
cheek。 The crisis is past。 Nature's benign Disposer has permitted
Nature to restore your life's gentle partner; heart to heart; mind
to mind〃
〃And soul to soul;〃 I cried in my solemn joy。 〃Above as below;
soul to soul!〃 Then; at a sign from Faber; the child took me by
the hand and led me up the stairs into Lilian's room。
Again those dear arms closed around me in wifelike and holy love;
and those true lips kissed away my tearseven as now; at the
distance of years from that happy morn; while I write the last
words of this Strange Story; the same faithful arms close around
me; the same tender lips kiss away my tears。
Thomas De Quincey
The Avenger
〃Why callest thou me murderer; and not rather the wrath of God
burning after the steps of the oppressor; and cleansing the earth
when it is wet with blood?〃
That series of terrific events by which our quiet city and
university in the northeastern quarter of Germany were convulsed
during the year 1816; has in itself; and considered merely as a
blind movement of human tiger…passion ranging unchained among men;
something too memorable to be forgotten or left without its own
separate record; but the moral lesson impressed by these events is
yet more memorable; and deserves the deep attention of coming
generations in their struggle after human improvement; not merely
in its own limited field of interest directly awakened; but in all
analogous fields of interest; as in fact already; and more than
once; in connection with these very events; this lesson has
obtained the effectual attention of Christian kings and princes
assembled in congress。 No tragedy; indeed; among all the sad ones
by which the charities of the human heart or of the fireside have
ever been outraged; can better merit a separate chapter in the
private history of German manners or social life than this
unparalleled case。 And; on the other hand; no one can put in a
better claim to be the historian than myself。
I was at the time; and still am; a professor in that city and
university which had the melancholy distinction of being its
theater。 I knew familiarly all the parties who were concerned in
it; either as sufferers or as agents。 I was present from first to
last; and watched the whole course of the mysterious storm which
fell upon our devoted city in a strength like that of a West Indian
hurricane; and which did seriously threaten at one time to
depopulate our university; through the dark suspicions which
settled upon its members; and the natural reaction of generous
indignation in repelling them; while the city in its more
stationary and native classes would very soon have manifested THEIR
awful sense of things; of the hideous insecurity for life; and of
the unfathomable dangers which had undermined their hearths below
their very feet; by sacrificing; whenever circumstances allowed
them; their houses and beautiful gardens in exchange for days
uncursed by panic; and nights unpolluted by blood。 Nothing; I can
take upon myself to assert; was left undone of all that human
foresight could suggest; or human ingenuity could accomplish。 But
observe the melancholy result: the more certain did these
arrangements strike people as remedies for the evil; so much the
more effectually did they aid the terror; but; above all; the awe;
the sense of mystery; when ten cases of total extermination;
applied to separate households; had occurred; in every one of which
these precautionary aids had failed to yield the slightest
assistance。 The horror; the perfect frenzy of fear; which seized
upon the town after that experience; baffles all attempt at
description。 Had these various contrivances failed merely in some
human and intelligible way; as by bringing the aid too tardily
still; in such cases; though the danger would no less have been
evidently deepened; nobody would have felt any further mystery than
what; from the very first; rested upon the persons and the motives
of the murderers。 But; as it was; when; in ten separate cases of
exterminating carnage; the astounded police; after an examination
the most searching; pursued from day to day; and almost exhausting
the patience by the minuteness of the investigation; had finally
pronounced that no attempt apparently had been made to benefit by
any of the signals preconcerted; that no footstep apparently had
moved in that directionthen; and after that result; a blind
misery of fear fell upon the population; so much the worse than any
anguish of a beleaguered