第 8 节
作者:风雅颂      更新:2021-10-16 18:44      字数:9322
  stool placed there to work a frame…up on them。  It had been done
  before; to Oppenheimer; and he had paid dearly for the confidence he
  reposed in Warden Atherton's tool。
  To my surpriseyes; to my elation be it saidboth my fellow…
  prisoners knew me through my record as an incorrigible。  Even into
  the living grave Oppenheimer had occupied for ten years had my fame;
  or notoriety; rather; penetrated。
  I had much to tell them of prison happenings and of the outside
  world。  The conspiracy to escape of the forty lifers; the search for
  the alleged dynamite; and all the treacherous frame…up of Cecil
  Winwood was news to them。  As they told me; news did occasionally
  dribble into solitary by way of the guards; but they had had nothing
  for a couple of months。  The present guards on duty in solitary were
  a particularly bad and vindictive set。
  Again and again that day we were cursed for our knuckle talking by
  whatever guard was on。  But we could not refrain。  The two of the
  living dead had become three; and we had so much to say; while the
  manner of saying it was exasperatingly slow and I was not so
  proficient as they at the knuckle game。
  〃Wait till Pie…Face comes on to…night;〃 Morrell rapped to me。  〃He
  sleeps most of his watch; and we can talk a streak。〃
  How we did talk that night!  Sleep was farthest from our eyes。  Pie…
  Face Jones was a mean and bitter man; despite his fatness; but we
  blessed that fatness because it persuaded to stolen snatches of
  slumber。  Nevertheless our incessant tapping bothered his sleep and
  irritated him so that he reprimanded us repeatedly。  And by the
  other night guards we were roundly cursed。  In the morning all
  reported much tapping during the night; and we paid for our little
  holiday; for; at nine; came Captain Jamie with several guards to
  lace us into the torment of the jacket。  Until nine the following
  morning; for twenty…four straight hours; laced and helpless on the
  floor; without food or water; we paid the price for speech。
  Oh; our guards were brutes!  And under their treatment we had to
  harden to brutes in order to live。  Hard work makes calloused hands。
  Hard guards make hard prisoners。  We continued to talk; and; on
  occasion; to be jacketed for punishment。  Night was the best time;
  and; when substitute guards chanced to be on; we often talked
  through a whole shift。
  Night and day were one with us who lived in the dark。  We could
  sleep any time; we could knuckle…talk only on occasion。  We told one
  another much of the history of our lives; and for long hours Morrell
  and I have lain silently; while steadily; with faint; far taps;
  Oppenheimer slowly spelled out his life…story; from the early years
  in a San Francisco slum; through his gang…training; through his
  initiation into all that was vicious; when as a lad of fourteen he
  served as night messenger in the red light district; through his
  first detected infraction of the laws; and on and on through thefts
  and robberies to the treachery of a comrade and to red slayings
  inside prison walls。
  They called Jake Oppenheimer the 〃Human Tiger。〃  Some cub reporter
  coined the phrase that will long outlive the man to whom it was
  applied。  And yet I ever found in Jake Oppenheimer all the cardinal
  traits of right humanness。  He was faithful and loyal。  I know of
  the times he has taken punishment in preference to informing on a
  comrade。  He was brave。  He was patient。  He was capable of self…
  sacrificeI could tell a story of this; but shall not take the
  time。  And justice; with him; was a passion。  The prison…killings
  done by him were due entirely to this extreme sense of justice。  And
  he had a splendid mind。  A life…time in prison; ten years of it in
  solitary; had not dimmed his brain。
  Morrell; ever a true comrade; too had a splendid brain。  In fact;
  and I who am about to die have the right to say it without incurring
  the charge of immodesty; the three best minds in San Quentin from
  the Warden down were the three that rotted there together in
  solitary。  And here at the end of my days; reviewing all that I have
  known of life; I am compelled to the conclusion that strong minds
  are never docile。  The stupid men; the fearful men; the men ungifted
  with passionate rightness and fearless championshipthese are the
  men who make model prisoners。  I thank all gods that Jake
  Oppenheimer; Ed Morrell; and I were not model prisoners。
  CHAPTER VI
  There is more than the germ of truth in things erroneous in the
  child's definition of memory as the thing one forgets with。  To be
  able to forget means sanity。  Incessantly to remember; means
  obsession; lunacy。  So the problem I faced in solitary; where
  incessant remembering strove for possession of me; was the problem
  of forgetting。  When I gamed with flies; or played chess with
  myself; or talked with my knuckles; I partially forgot。  What I
  desired was entirely to forget。
  There were the boyhood memories of other times and placesthe
  〃trailing clouds of glory〃 of Wordsworth。  If a boy had had these
  memories; were they irretrievably lost when he had grown to manhood?
  Could this particular content of his boy brain be utterly
  eliminated?  Or were these memories of other times and places still
  residual; asleep; immured in solitary in brain cells similarly to
  the way I was immured in a cell in San Quentin?
  Solitary life…prisoners have been known to resurrect and look upon
  the sun again。  Then why could not these other…world memories of the
  boy resurrect?
  But how?  In my judgment; by attainment of complete forgetfulness of
  present and of manhood past。
  And again; how?  Hypnotism should do it。  If by hypnotism the
  conscious mind were put to sleep; and the subconscious mind
  awakened; then was the thing accomplished; then would all the
  dungeon doors of the brain be thrown wide; then would the prisoners
  emerge into the sunshine。
  So I reasonedwith what result you shall learn。  But first I must
  tell how; as a boy; I had had these other…world memories。  I had
  glowed in the clouds of glory I trailed from lives aforetime。  Like
  any boy; I had been haunted by the other beings I had been at other
  times。  This had been during my process of becoming; ere the flux of
  all that I had ever been had hardened in the mould of the one
  personality that was to be known by men for a few years as Darrell
  Standing。
  Let me narrate just one incident。  It was up in Minnesota on the old
  farm。  I was nearly six years old。  A missionary to China; returned
  to the United States and sent out by the Board of Missions to raise
  funds from the farmers; spent the night in our house。  It was in the
  kitchen just after supper; as my mother was helping me undress for
  bed; and the missionary was showing photographs of the Holy Land。
  And what I am about to tell you I should long since have forgotten
  had I not heard my father recite it to wondering listeners so many
  times during my childhood。
  I cried out at sight of one of the photographs and looked at it;
  first with eagerness; and then with disappointment。  It had seemed
  of a sudden most familiar; in much the same way that my father's
  barn would have been in a photograph。  Then it had seemed altogether
  strange。  But as I continued to look the haunting sense of
  familiarity came back。
  〃The Tower of David;〃 the missionary said to my mother。
  〃No!〃 I cried with great positiveness。
  〃You mean that isn't its name?〃 the missionary asked。
  I nodded。
  〃Then what is its name; my boy?〃
  〃It's name is 。 。 。〃 I began; then concluded lamely; 〃I; forget。〃
  〃It don't look the same now;〃 I went on after a pause。  〃They've ben
  fixin' it up awful。〃
  Here the missionary handed to my mother another photograph he had
  sought out。
  〃I was there myself six months ago; Mrs。 Standing。〃  He pointed with
  his finger。  〃That is the Jaffa Gate where I walked in and right up
  to the Tower of David in the back of the picture where my finger is
  now。  The authorities are pretty well agreed on such matters。  El
  Kul'ah; as it was known by〃
  But here I broke in again; pointing to rubbish piles of ruined
  masonry on the left edge of the photograph
  〃Over there somewhere;〃 I said。  〃That name you just spoke was what
  the Jews called it。  But we called it something else。  We called it
  。 。 。 I forget。〃
  〃Listen to the youngster;〃 my father chuckled。  〃You'd think he'd
  ben there。〃
  I nodded my head; for in that moment I knew I had been there; though
  all seemed strangely different。  My father laughed the harder; but
  the missionary thought I was making game of him。  He handed me
  another photograph。  It was just a bleak waste of a landscape;
  barren of trees and vegetation; a shallow canyon with easy…sloping
  walls of rubble。  In the middle distance was a cluster of wretched;
  flat…roofed hovels。
  〃Now; my boy; where is that?〃 the missionary q