第 2 节
作者:
散发弄舟 更新:2021-10-16 18:43 字数:9322
turrets; four lifts; and was fitted up by one of the best West End
establishments。 The sanitary arrangements were excellent; and the
drainage of the most perfect order; as I had reason to know personally later。
I was so affected by the peaceful solitude that I lay down under a tree and
presently fell asleep。 I was awakened by the sound of voices; and;
looking up; beheld two men bending over me。 One was a grizzled
veteran; and the other a younger dandyfied man; both were dressed in
shooting suits。
〃Never saw such a resemblance before in all my life;〃 said the elder
man。 〃'Pon my soul! if the King hadn't got shaved yesterday because the
Princess Flirtia said his beard tickled her; I'd swear it was he!〃
I could not help thinking how lucky it wasfor this narrative that the
King HAD shaved; otherwise my story would have degenerated into a
mere Comedy of Errors。 Opening my eyes; I said boldly:
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〃Now that you are satisfied who I resemble; gentlemen; perhaps you
will tell me who you are?〃
〃Certainly;〃 said the elder curtly。 〃I am Spitza simple colonel of his
Majesty's; yet; nevertheless; the one man who runs this whole dynasty
and this young gentleman is Fritz; my lieutenant。 And you are?〃
〃My name is Razorbillbrother to Lord Burleydon;〃 I replied calmly。
〃Good heavens! another of the lot!〃 he muttered。 Then; correcting
himself; he said brusquely: 〃Any relation to that Englishwoman who was
so sweet on the old Rupert centuries ago?〃
Here; again; I suppose my sister…in…law would have had me knock
down the foreign insulter of my English ancestressbut I colored to the
roots of my hair; and even fartherwith pleasure at this proof of my royal
descent! And then a cheery voice was heard calling 〃Spitz!〃 and 〃Fritz!〃
through the woods。
〃The King!〃 said Spitz to Fritz quickly。 〃He must not see him。〃
〃Too late;〃 said Fritz; as a young man bounded lightly out of the
bushes。
I was thunderstruck! It was as if I had suddenly been confronted with
a mirrorand beheld myself! Of course he was not quite so good…
looking; or so tall; but he was still a colorable imitation! I was delighted。
Nevertheless; for a moment he did not seem to reciprocate my feeling。
He stared at me; staggered back and passed his hand across his forehead。
〃Can it be;〃 he muttered thickly; 〃that I've got 'em agin? Yet I only had
shingle glash!〃
But Fritz quickly interposed。
〃Your Majesty is all rightthough;〃 he added in a lower voice; 〃let this
be a warning to you for to…morrow! This gentleman is Mr。 Razorbill
you know the old story of the Razorbills?Ha! ha!〃
But the King did not laugh; he extended his hand and said gently; 〃You
are welcomemy cousin!〃 Indeed; my sister…in…law would have
probably said thatdissipated though he washe was the only gentleman
there。
〃I have come to see the coronation; your Majesty;〃 I said。
〃And you shall;〃 said the King heartily; 〃and shall go with us! The
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show can't begin without useh; Spitz?〃 he added playfully; poking the
veteran in the ribs; 〃whatever Michael may do!〃
Then he linked his arms in Spitz's and mine。 〃Let's go to the hut
and have some supper and fizz;〃 he said gayly。
We went to the hut。 We had supper。 We ate and drank heavily。 We
danced madly around the table。 Nevertheless I thought that Spitz and
Fritz were worried by the King's potations; and Spitz at last went so far as
to remind his Majesty that they were to start early in the morning for
Kohlslau。 I noticed also that as the King drank his speech grew thicker
and Spitz and Fritz exchanged glances。 At last Spitz said with stern
significance:
〃Your Majesty has not forgotten the test invariably submitted to the
King at his coronation?〃
〃Shertenly not;〃 replied the King; with his reckless laugh。 〃The King
mush be able to pronounshname of his countryintel…lillil… gibly: mush
shay (hic!): 'I'm King ofKing ofTootoo…tooral… looral…anyer。'〃 He
staggered; laughed; and fell under the table。
〃He cannot say it!〃 gasped Fritz and Spitz in one voice。 〃He is lost!〃
〃Unless;〃 said Fritz suddenly; pointing at me with a flash of
intelligence; 〃HE can personate him; and say it。 Can you?〃 he turned to
me brusquely。
It was an awful moment。 I had been drinking heavily too; but I
resolved to succeed。 〃I'm King of Trooly…rooly〃 I murmured; but I
could not master itI staggered and followed the King under the table。
〃Is there no one here;〃 roared Spitz; 〃who can shave thish dynasty; and
shay 'Tooral'? No! it! I mean 'Trularlooral'〃 but he; too; lurched
hopelessly forward。
〃No one can say 'Tooral…looral'〃 muttered Fritz; and; grasping Spitz
in despair; they both rolled under the table。
How long we lay there; Heaven knows! I was awakened by Spitz
playing the garden hose on me。 He was booted and spurred; with Fritz
by his side。 The King was lying on a bench; saying feebly: 〃Blesh you;
my chillen。〃
〃By politely acceding to Black Michael's request to 'try our one… and…
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six sherry;' he has been brought to this condition;〃 said Spitz bitterly。
〃It's a trick to keep him from being crowned。 In this country if the King
is crowned while drunk; the kingdom instantly reverts to a villainno
matter who。 But in this case the villain is Black Michael。 Ha! What say
you; lad? Shall we frustrate the rascal; by having YOU personate the
King?〃
I waswell!intoxicated at the thought! But what would my sister…
in…law say? Would shein her Nonconformist conscience consider it
strictly honorable? But I swept all scruples aside。 A King was to be
saved! 〃I will go;〃 I said。 〃Let us on to Kohlslauriding like the
wind!〃 We rode like the wind; furiously; madly。 Mounted on a wild;
dashing bayknown familiarly as the 〃Bay of Biscay〃 from its rough
turbulenceI easily kept the lead。 But our horses began to fail。 Suddenly
Spitz halted; clapped his hand to his head; and threw himself from his
horse。 〃Fools!〃 he said; 〃we should have taken the train! It will get
there an hour before we will!〃 He pointed to a wayside station where the
7。15 excursion train for Kohlslau was waiting。
〃But how dreadfully unmediaeval!What will the public say?〃 I
began。
〃Bother the public!〃 he said gruffly。 〃Who's running this dynasty
you or I? Come!〃 With the assistance of Fritz he tied up my face with a
handkerchief to simulate toothache; and then; with a shout of defiance; we
three rushed madly into a closely packed third… class carriage。
Never shall I forget the perils; the fatigue; the hopes and fears of that
mad journey。 Panting; perspiring; packed together with cheap trippers;
but exalted with the one hope of saving the King; we at last staggered out
on the Kohlslau platform utterly exhausted。 As we did so we heard a
distant roar from the city。 Fritz turned an ashen gray; Spitz a livid blue。
〃Are we too late?〃 he gasped; as we madly fought our way into the street;
where shouts of 〃The King! The King!〃 were rending the air。 〃Can it
be Black Michael?〃 But here the crowd parted; and a procession;
preceded by outriders; flashed into the square。 And there; seated in a
carriage beside the most beautiful red…haired girl I h