第 62 节
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不受约束 更新:2021-05-04 17:23 字数:9201
the same sedate; immovable manner; and that there was no hope
of making him relax a muscle of his face; he added: ‘However; I
have said what I came to say; and; with another apology for this
intrusion; I may take myself off。 Of course I shall observe your
directions; in considering the matter as one to be arranged
between you and me solely; and not to be referred to; up at the
Doctor’s。’
‘Have you dined?’ asked Mr。 Wickfield; with a motion of his
hand towards the table。
‘Thank’ee。 I am going to dine;’ said Mr。 Maldon; ‘with my
cousin Annie。 Good…bye!’
Mr。 Wickfield; without rising; looked after him thoughtfully as
he went out。 He was rather a shallow sort of young gentleman; I
thought; with a handsome face; a rapid utterance; and a confident;
bold air。 And this was the first I ever saw of Mr。 Jack Maldon;
whom I had not expected to see so soon; when I heard the Doctor
speak of him that morning。
When we had dined; we went upstairs again; where everything
went on exactly as on the previous day。 Agnes set the glasses and
decanters in the same corner; and Mr。 Wickfield sat down to drink;
and drank a good deal。 Agnes played the piano to him; sat by him;
and worked and talked; and played some games at dominoes with
me。 In good time she made tea; and afterwards; when I brought
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down my books; looked into them; and showed me what she knew
of them (which was no slight matter; though she said it was); and
what was the best way to learn and understand them。 I see her;
with her modest; orderly; placid manner; and I hear her beautiful
calm voice; as I write these words。 The influence for all good;
which she came to exercise over me at a later time; begins already
to descend upon my breast。 I love little Em’ly; and I don’t love
Agnes—no; not at all in that way—but I feel that there are
goodness; peace; and truth; wherever Agnes is; and that the soft
light of the coloured window in the church; seen long ago; falls on
her always; and on me when I am near her; and on everything
around。
The time having come for her withdrawal for the night; and she
having left us; I gave Mr。 Wickfield my hand; preparatory to going
away myself。 But he checked me and said: ‘Should you like to stay
with us; Trotwood; or to go elsewhere?’
‘To stay;’ I answered; quickly。
‘You are sure?’
‘If you please。 If I may!’
‘Why; it’s but a dull life that we lead here; boy; I am afraid;’ he
said。
‘Not more dull for me than Agnes; sir。 Not dull at all!’
‘Than Agnes;’ he repeated; walking slowly to the great chimney…
piece; and leaning against it。 ‘Than Agnes!’
He had drank wine that evening (or I fancied it); until his eyes
were bloodshot。 Not that I could see them now; for they were cast
down; and shaded by his hand; but I had noticed them a little
while before。
‘Now I wonder;’ he muttered; ‘whether my Agnes tires of me。
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When should I ever tire of her! But that’s different; that’s quite
different。’
He was musing; not speaking to me; so I remained quiet。
‘A dull old house;’ he said; ‘and a monotonous life; but I must
have her near me。 I must keep her near me。 If the thought that I
may die and leave my darling; or that my darling may die and
leave me; comes like a spectre; to distress my happiest hours; and
is only to be drowned in—’
He did not supply the word; but pacing slowly to the place
where he had sat; and mechanically going through the action of
pouring wine from the empty decanter; set it down and paced
back again。
‘If it is miserable to bear; when she is here;’ he said; ‘what
would it be; and she away? No; no; no。 I cannot try that。’
He leaned against the chimney…piece; brooding so long that I
could not decide whether to run the risk of disturbing him by
going; or to remain quietly where I was; until he should come out
of his reverie。 At length he aroused himself; and looked about the
room until his eyes encountered mine。
‘Stay with us; Trotwood; eh?’ he said in his usual manner; and
as if he were answering something I had just said。 ‘I am glad of it。
You are company to us both。 It is wholesome to have you here。
Wholesome for me; wholesome for Agnes; wholesome perhaps for
all of us。’
‘I am sure it is for me; sir;’ I said。 ‘I am so glad to be here。’
‘That’s a fine fellow!’ said Mr。 Wickfield。 ‘As long as you are
glad to be here; you shall stay here。’ He shook hands with me upon
it; and clapped me on the back; and told me that when I had
anything to do at night after Agnes had left us; or when I wished to
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read for my own pleasure; I was free to come down to his room; if
he were there and if I desired it for company’s sake; and to sit with
him。 I thanked him for his consideration; and; as he went down
soon afterwards; and I was not tired; went down too; with a book
in my hand; to avail myself; for half…an…hour; of his permission。
But; seeing a light in the little round office; and immediately
feeling myself attracted towards Uriah Heep; who had a sort of
fascination for me; I went in there instead。 I found Uriah reading a
great fat book; with such demonstrative attention; that his lank
forefinger followed up every line as he read; and made clammy
tracks along the page (or so I fully believed) like a snail。
‘You are working late tonight; Uriah;’ says I。
‘Yes; Master Copperfield;’ says Uriah。
As I was getting on the stool opposite; to talk to him more
conveniently; I observed that he had not such a thing as a smile
about him; and that he could only widen his mouth and make two
hard creases down his cheeks; one on each side; to stand for one。
‘I am not doing office…work; Master Copperfield;’ said Uriah。
‘What work; then?’ I asked。
‘I am improving my legal knowledge; Master Copperfield;’ said
Uriah。 ‘I am going through Tidd’s Practice。 Oh; what a writer Mr。
Tidd is; Master Copperfield!’
My stool was such a tower of observation; that as I watched him
reading on again; after this rapturous exclamation; and following
up the lines with his forefinger; I observed that his nostrils; which
were thin and pointed; with sharp dints in them; had a singular
and most uncomfortable way of expanding and contracting
themselves—that they seemed to twinkle instead of his eyes;
which hardly ever twinkled at all。
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‘I suppose you are quite a great lawyer?’ I said; after looking at
him for some time。
‘Me; Master Copperfield?’ said Uriah。 ‘Oh; no! I’m a very umble
person。’
It was no fancy of mine about his hands; I observed; for he
frequently ground the palms against each other as if to squeeze
them dry and warm; besides often wiping them; in a stealthy way;
on his pocket…handkerchief。
‘I am well aware that I am the umblest person going;’ said
Uriah Heep; modestly; ‘let the other be where he may。 My mother
is likewise a very umble person。 We live in a numble abode;
Master Copperfield; but have much to be thankful for。 My father’s
former calling was umble。 He was a sexton。’
‘What is he now?’ I asked。
‘He is a partaker of glory at present; Master Copperfield;’ said
Uriah Heep。 ‘But we have much to be thankful for。 How much
have I to be thankful for in living with Mr。 Wickfield!’
I asked Uriah if he had been with Mr。 Wickfield long?
‘I have been with him; going on four year; Master Copperfield;’
said Uriah; shutting up his book; after carefully marking the place
where he had left off。 ‘Since a year after my father’s death。 How
much have I to be thankful for; in that! How much have I to be
thankful for; in Mr。 Wickfield’s kind intention to give me my
articles; which would otherwise not lay within the umble means of
mother and self!’
‘Then; when your articled time is over; you’ll be a regular
lawyer; I suppose?’ said I。
‘With the blessing of Providence; Master Copperfield;’ returned
Uriah。
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‘Perhaps you’ll be a partner in Mr。 Wickfield’s business; one of
these days;’ I said; to make myself agreeable; ‘and it will be
Wickfield and Heep; or Heep late Wickfield。’
‘Oh no; Master Copperfield;’ returned Uriah; shaking his head;
‘I am much too umble for that!’
He certainly did look uncommonly like the carved face on the
beam outside my window; as he sat; in his humility; eyeing me
sideways; with his mouth widened; and the creases in his cheeks。
‘Mr。 Wickfield is a most excellent man; Master Copperfield;’
said Uriah。 ‘If you have known him long; you know it; I am sure;
much better than I can inform you。’
I replied that I was certain he was; but that I had not known
him long myself; though he was a friend of my aunt’s。
‘Oh; indeed; Master Copperfield;’ said Uriah。 ‘Your aunt is a
sweet lady; Master Coppe