第 5 节
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circumstances。 There cannot be any objection to your seeing her
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presently; ma’am。 It may do her good。’
‘And she。 How is she?’ said my aunt; sharply。
Mr。 Chillip laid his head a little more on one side; and looked at
my aunt like an amiable bird。
‘The baby;’ said my aunt。 ‘How is she?’
‘Ma’am;’ returned Mr。 Chillip; ‘I apprehended you had known。
It’s a boy。’
My aunt said never a word; but took her bonnet by the strings;
in the manner of a sling; aimed a blow at Mr。 Chillip’s head with it;
put it on bent; walked out; and never came back。 She vanished like
a discontented fairy; or like one of those supernatural beings;
whom it was popularly supposed I was entitled to see; and never
came back any more。
No。 I lay in my basket; and my mother lay in her bed; but
Betsey Trotwood Copperfield was for ever in the land of dreams
and shadows; the tremendous region whence I had so lately
travelled; and the light upon the window of our room shone out
upon the earthly bourne of all such travellers; and the mound
above the ashes and the dust that once was he; without whom I
had never been。
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David Copperfield
Chapter 2
I OBSERVE
The first objects that assume a distinct presence before me;
as I look far back; into the blank of my infancy; are my
mother with her pretty hair and youthful shape; and
Peggotty with no shape at all; and eyes so dark that they seemed to
darken their whole neighbourhood in her face; and cheeks and
arms so hard and red that I wondered the birds didn’t peck her in
preference to apples。
I believe I can remember these two at a little distance apart;
dwarfed to my sight by stooping down or kneeling on the floor;
and I going unsteadily from the one to the other。 I have an
impression on my mind which I cannot distinguish from actual
remembrance; of the touch of Peggotty’s forefinger as she used to
hold it out to me; and of its being roughened by needlework; like a
pocket nutmeg…grater。
This may be fancy; though I think the memory of most of us can
go farther back into such times than many of us suppose; just as I
believe the power of observation in numbers of very young
children to be quite wonderful for its closeness and accuracy。
Indeed; I think that most grown men who are remarkable in this
respect; may with greater propriety be said not to have lost the
faculty; than to have acquired it; the rather; as I generally observe
such men to retain a certain freshness; and gentleness; and
capacity of being pleased; which are also an inheritance they have
preserved from their childhood。
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David Copperfield
I might have a misgiving that I am ‘meandering’ in stopping to
say this; but that it brings me to remark that I build these
conclusions; in part upon my own experience of myself; and if it
should appear from anything I may set down in this narrative that
I was a child of close observation; or that as a man I have a strong
memory of my childhood; I undoubtedly lay claim to both of these
characteristics。
Looking back; as I was saying; into the blank of my infancy; the
first objects I can remember as standing out by themselves from a
confusion of things; are my mother and Peggotty。 What else do I
remember? Let me see。
There comes out of the cloud; our house—not new to me; but
quite familiar; in its earliest remembrance。 On the ground…floor is
Peggotty’s kitchen; opening into a back yard; with a pigeon…house
on a pole; in the centre; without any pigeons in it; a great dog…
kennel in a corner; without any dog; and a quantity of fowls that
look terribly tall to me; walking about; in a menacing and ferocious
manner。 There is one cock who gets upon a post to crow; and
seems to take particular notice of me as I look at him through the
kitchen window; who makes me shiver; he is so fierce。 Of the geese
outside the side…gate who come waddling after me with their long
necks stretched out when I go that way; I dream at night: as a man
environed by wild beasts might dream of lions。
Here is a long passage—what an enormous perspective I make
of it!—leading from Peggotty’s kitchen to the front door。 A dark
store…room opens out of it; and that is a place to be run past at
night; for I don’t know what may be among those tubs and jars
and old tea…chests; when there is nobody in there with a dimly…
burning light; letting a mouldy air come out of the door; in which
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there is the smell of soap; pickles; pepper; candles; and coffee; all
at one whiff。 Then there are the two parlours: the parlour in which
we sit of an evening; my mother and I and Peggotty—for Peggotty
is quite our companion; when her work is done and we are alone—
and the best parlour where we sit on a Sunday; grandly; but not so
comfortably。 There is something of a doleful air about that room to
me; for Peggotty has told me—I don’t know when; but apparently
ages ago—about my father’s funeral; and the company having
their black cloaks put on。 One Sunday night my mother reads to
Peggotty and me in there; how Lazarus was raised up from the
dead。 And I am so frightened that they are afterwards obliged to
take me out of bed; and show me the quiet churchyard out of the
bedroom window; with the dead all lying in their graves at rest;
below the solemn moon。
There is nothing half so green that I know anywhere; as the
grass of that churchyard; nothing half so shady as its trees;
nothing half so quiet as its tombstones。 The sheep are feeding
there; when I kneel up; early in the morning; in my little bed in a
closet within my mother’s room; to look out at it; and I see the red
light shining on the sun…dial; and think within myself; ‘Is the sundial glad; I wonder; that it can tell the time again?’
Here is our pew in the church。 What a high…backed pew! With a
window near it; out of which our house can be seen; and is seen
many times during the morning’s service; by Peggotty; who likes
to make herself as sure as she can that it’s not being robbed; or is
not in flames。 But though Peggotty’s eye wanders; she is much
offended if mine does; and frowns to me; as I stand upon the seat;
that I am to look at the clergyman。 But I can’t always look at him—
I know him without that white thing on; and I am afraid of his
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David Copperfield
wondering why I stare so; and perhaps stopping the service to
inquire—and what am I to do? It’s a dreadful thing to gape; but I
must do something。 I look at my mother; but she pretends not to
see me。 I look at a boy in the aisle; and he makes faces at me。 I
look at the sunlight coming in at the open door through the porch;
and there I see a stray sheep—I don’t mean a sinner; but mutton—
half making up his mind to come into the church。 I feel that if I
looked at him any longer; I might be tempted to say something out
loud; and what would become of me then! I look up at the
monumental tablets on the wall; and try to think of Mr。 Bodgers
late of this parish; and what the feelings of Mrs。 Bodgers must
have been; when affliction sore; long time Mr。 Bodgers bore; and
physicians were in vain。 I wonder whether they called in Mr。
Chillip; and he was in vain; and if so; how he likes to be reminded
of it once a week。 I look from Mr。 Chillip; in his Sunday neckcloth;
to the pulpit; and think what a good place it would be to play in;
and what a castle it would make; with another boy coming up the
stairs to attack it; and having the velvet cushion with the tassels
thrown down on his head。 In time my eyes gradually shut up; and;
from seeming to hear the clergyman singing a drowsy song in the
heat; I hear nothing; until I fall off the seat with a crash; and am
taken out; more dead than alive; by Peggotty。
And now I see the outside of our house; with the latticed
bedroom…windows standing open to let in the sweet…smelling air;
and the ragged old rooks’…nests still dangling in the elm…trees at
the bottom of the front garden。 Now I am in the garden at the
back; beyond the yard where the empty pigeon…house and dog…
kennel are—a very preserve of butterflies; as I remember it; with a
high fence; and a gate and padlock; where the fruit clusters on the
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trees; riper and richer than fruit has ever been since; in any other
garden; and where my mother gathers some in a basket; while I
stand by; bolting furtive gooseberries; and trying to look unmoved。
A great wind rises; and the summer is gone in a moment。 We are
playing in the winter twilight; dancing about the parlour。 When
my mother is out of breath and rests herself in an elbow…chair; I
watch her winding her bright curls round her fingers; and
straitening her waist; and nobody knows better than I do that she
likes to look so well; and is proud of being so pretty。
That is among my very ear