第 14 节
作者:冬恋      更新:2021-04-30 16:59      字数:9322
  once   upon   a   household   footing   with   the   family;his   views   of   marriage
  changed entirely。       It now seemed to him the duty; as well as the high and
  holy privilege of a young man; to marry and manfully to pay his debt to
  society。     When in Rena's presence; he could not imagine how he had ever
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  contemplated   the   possibility   of   marriage   with   Blanche   Leary;she   was
  utterly;   entirely;   and   hopelessly    unsuited    to  him。    For    a  fair  man   of
  vivacious   temperament;   this   stately  dark   girl   was   the   ideal   mate。   Even
  his   mother   would   admit   this;   if   she   could   only   see   Rena。 To   win   this
  beautiful girl for his wife would be a worthy task。               He had crowned her
  Queen of Love and Beauty; since then she had ascended the throne of his
  heart。 He would make her queen of his home and mistress of his life。
  To Rena this brief month's courtship came as a new education。                    Not
  only had this fair young man crowned her queen; and honored her above
  all the ladies in town; but since then he had waited assiduously upon her;
  had   spoken   softly   to   her;   had   looked   at   her   with   shining   eyes;   and   had
  sought to be alone with her。         The time soon came when to touch his hand
  in greeting sent a thrill through her frame;a time when she listened for
  his footstep and was happy in his presence。             He had been bold enough at
  the tournament; he had since become somewhat bashful and constrained。
  He must be in love; she thought; and wondered how soon he would speak。
  If it were so sweet   to walk with him in   the garden; or along the shaded
  streets; to sit with him; to feel the touch of his hand; what happiness would
  it not be to hear him say that he loved herto bear his name; to live with
  him always。       To be thus loved and honored by this handsome young man;
  she could hardly believe it possible。           He would never speakhe would
  discover   her   secret   and   withdraw。     She   turned   pale   at   the   thought;ah;
  God! something would happen;it was too good to be true。                    The Prince
  would never try on the glass slipper。
  Tryon first told his   love for Rena one  summer evening on their  way
  home from church。          They were walking in the moonlight along the quiet
  street; which; but for their presence; seemed quite deserted。
  〃Miss   WarwickRowena;〃   he   said;   clasping   with   his   right   hand   the
  hand that rested on his left arm; 〃I love you!           Do youlove me?〃
  To Rena this simple avowal came with much greater force than a more
  formal declaration could have had。            It appealed to her own simple nature。
  Indeed; few women at such a moment criticise the form in which the most
  fateful   words   of   lifebut   oneare   spoken。    Words;   while   pleasant;   are
  really superfluous。       Her whispered 〃Yes〃 spoke volumes。
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  They walked on past the house; along the country road into which the
  street    soon   merged。      When      they   returned;   an   hour    later;  they  found
  Warwick seated on the piazza; in a rocking…chair; smoking a fragrant cigar。
  〃Well;   children;〃   he   observed   with   mock   severity;   〃you   are   late   in
  getting home from church。           The sermon must have been extremely long。〃
  〃We   have   been   attending   an   after…meeting;〃   replied   Tryon   joyfully;
  〃and have been discussing an old text; ‘Little children; love one another;'
  and its   corollary; ‘It   is not   good for  man to   live alone。'       John;  I am  the
  happiest man alive。        Your sister has promised to marry me。             I should like
  to shake my brother's hand。〃
  Never does one feel so strongly the universal brotherhood of man as
  when   one   loves   some   other   fellow's   sister。     Warwick   sprang   from   his
  chair and clasped Tryon's extended hand with real emotion。                    He knew of
  no   man   whom   he   would   have   preferred   to   Tryon   as   a   husband   for   his
  sister。
  〃My dear Georgemy dear sister;〃 he exclaimed; 〃I am very; very glad。
  I wish you every happiness。           My sister is the most fortunate of women。〃
  〃And I am the luckiest of men;〃 cried Tryon。
  〃I wish you every happiness;〃 repeated Warwick; adding; with a touch
  of   solemnity;   as   a   certain   thought;   never   far   distant;   occurred   to   him;   〃I
  hope that neither of you may ever regret your choice。〃
  Thus placed upon the footing of an accepted lover; Tryon's visits to the
  house became more frequent。             He wished to fix a time for the marriage;
  but at this point Rena developed a strange reluctance。
  〃Can we not love each other for a while?〃 she asked。                〃To be engaged
  is a pleasure that comes but once; it would be a pity to cut it too short。〃
  〃It is a pleasure that I would cheerfully dispense with;〃 he replied; 〃for
  the   certainty   of   possession。    I   want   you   all   to   myself;   and   all   the   time。
  Things   might   happen。        If   I   should   die;   for   instance;   before   I   married
  you〃
  〃Oh; don't suppose such awful things;〃 she cried; putting her hand over
  his mouth。
  He held it there and kissed it until she pulled it away。
  〃I should consider;〃 he resumed; completing the sentence; 〃that my life
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  had been a failure。〃
  〃If I should die;〃 she murmured; 〃I should die happy in the knowledge
  that you had loved me。〃
  〃In   three   weeks;〃   he   went   on;   〃I   shall   have   finished   my   business   in
  Clarence; and there will be but one thing to keep me here。                  When shall it
  be?    I must take you home with me。〃
  〃I   will   let   you   know;〃   she   replied;   with   a   troubled   sigh;   〃in   a   week
  from to…day。〃
  〃I'll call your attention to the subject every day in the mean time;〃 he
  asserted。     〃I shouldn't like you to forget it。〃
  Rena's   shrinking   from  the   irrevocable step   of   marriage   was due   to   a
  simple and yet complex cause。            Stated baldly; it was the consciousness of
  her    secret;  the   complexity     arose   out   of  the  various    ways    in  which    it
  seemed to bear upon her future。            Our lives are so bound up with those of
  our fellow men that the slightest departure from the beaten path involves a
  multiplicity  of   small   adjustments。       It   had   not   been   difficult   for   Rena   to
  conform her speech; her manners; and in a measure her modes of thought;
  to those of the people around her; but when this readjustment went beyond
  mere     externals    and   concerned     the   vital  issues   of  life;  the  secret   that
  oppressed her took on a more serious aspect; with tragic possibilities。                    A
  discursive imagination was not one of her characteristics; or the danger of
  a marriage of which perfect frankness was not a condition might well have
  presented      itself  before    her   heart   had   become      involved。     Under      the
  influence of doubt and fear acting upon love; the invisible bar to happiness
  glowed with a lambent flame that threatened dire disaster。
  〃Would he have loved me at all;〃 she asked herself; 〃if he had known
  the story of my past?         Or; having loved me; could he blame me now for
  what I cannot help?〃
  There were two shoals in the channel of her life; upon either of which
  her happiness might go to shipwreck。             Since leaving the house behind the
  cedars;    where     she  had   been    brought    into   the  world    without    her   own
  knowledge       or  consent;    and   had   first  drawn    the   breath   of  life  by   the
  involuntary  contraction   of   certain   muscles;   Rena   had   learned;   in   a   short
  time; many things; but she was yet to learn that the innocent suffer with
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  the   guilty;   and   feel   the   punishment   the   more   keenly   because   unmerited。
  She had yet to learn that the old Mosaic formula; 〃The sins of the fathers
  shall   be   visited   upon   the   children;〃   was   graven   more   indelibly  upon   the
  heart of the race than upon the tables of Sinai。
  But would her lover still love her; if he knew all?                She had read so