第 11 节
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一米八 更新:2021-04-30 16:59 字数:9322
〃I will go and bring her to you;〃 I exclaimed。 Bridget tightened her hold upon my arm。
〃Not so;〃 said she; in a low; hoarse voice。 〃It would kill me to see her again as I saw her this morning。 And I must live till I have worked my work。 Leave me!〃 said she; suddenly; and again taking up the cross。 〃I defy the demon I have called up。 Leave me to wrestle with it!〃
She stood up; as if in an ecstasy of inspiration; from which all fear was banished。 I lingeredwhy I can hardly telluntil once more she bade me begone。 As I went along the forest way; I looked back; and saw her planting the cross in the empty threshold; where the door had been。
The next morning Lucy and I went to seek her; to bid her join her prayers with ours。 The cottage stood open and wide to our gaze。 No human being was there: the cross remained on the threshold; but Bridget was gone。
CHAPTER III。
What was to be done next? was the question that I asked myself。 As for Lucy; she would fain have submitted to the doom that lay upon her。 Her gentleness and piety; under the pressure of so horrible a life; seemed over…passive to me。 She never complained。 Mrs。 Clarke complained more than ever。 As for me; I was more in love with the real Lucy than ever; but I shrunk from the false similitude with an intensity proportioned to my love。 I found out by instinct that Mrs。 Clarke had occasional temptations to leave Lucy。 The good lady's nerves were shaken; and; from what she said; I could almost have concluded that the object of the Double was to drive away from Lucy this last; and almost earliest friend。 At times; I could scarcely bear to own it; but I myself felt inclined to turn recreant; and I would accuse Lucy of being too patienttoo resigned。 One after another; she won the little children of Coldholme。 (Mrs。 Clarke and she had resolved to stay there; for was it not as good a place as any other; to such as they? and did not all our faint hopes rest on Bridgetnever seen or heard of now; but still we trusted to come back; or give some token?) So; as I say; one after another; the little children came about my Lucy; won by her soft tones; and her gentle smiles; and kind actions。 Alas! one after another they fell away; and shrunk from her path with blanching terror; and we too surely guessed the reason why。 It was the last drop。 I could bear it no longer。 I resolved no more to linger around the spot; but to go back to my uncle; and among the learned divines of the city of London; seek for some power whereby to annul the curse。
My uncle; meanwhile; had obtained all the requisite testimonials relating to Lucy's descent and birth; from the Irish lawyers; and from Mr。 Gisborne。 The latter gentleman had written from abroad (he was again serving in the Austrian army); a letter alternately passionately self…reproachful and stoically repellant。 It was evident that when he thought of Maryher short lifehow he had wronged her; and of her violent death; he could hardly find words severe enough for his own conduct; and from this point of view; the curse that Bridget had laid upon him and his; was regarded by him as a prophetic doom; to the utterance of which she was moved by a Higher Power; working for the fulfilment of a deeper vengeance than for the death of the poor dog。 But then; again; when he came to speak of his daughter; the repugnance which the conduct of the demoniac creature had produced in his mind; was but ill…disguised under a show of profound indifference as to Lucy's fate。 One almost felt as if he would have been as content to put her out of existence; as he would have been to destroy some disgusting reptile that had invaded his chamber or his couch。
The great Fitzgerald property was Lucy's; and that was allwas nothing。
My uncle and I sat in the gloom of a London November evening; in our house in Ormond Street。 I was out of health; and felt as if I were in an inextricable coil of misery。 Lucy and I wrote to each other; but that was little; and we dared not see each other for dread of the fearful Third; who had more than once taken her place at our meetings。 My uncle had; on the day I speak of; bidden prayers to be put up on the ensuing Sabbath in many a church and meeting…house in London; for one grievously tormented by an evil spirit。 He had faith in prayersI had none; I was fast losing faith in all things。 So we sat; he trying to interest me in the old talk of other days; I oppressed by one thoughtwhen our old servant; Anthony; opened the door; and; without speaking; showed in a very gentlemanly and prepossessing man; who had something remarkable about his dress; betraying his profession to be that of the Roman Catholic priesthood。 He glanced at my uncle first; then at me。 It was to me he bowed。
〃I did not give my name;〃 said he; 〃because you would hardly have recognised it; unless; sir; when; in the north; you heard of Father Bernard; the chaplain at Stoney Hurst?〃
I remembered afterwards that I had heard of him; but at the time I had utterly forgotten it; so I professed myself a complete stranger to him; while my ever…hospitable uncle; although hating a papist as much as it was in his nature to hate anything; placed a chair for the visitor; and bade Anthony bring glasses; and a fresh jug of claret。
Father Bernard received this courtesy with the graceful ease and pleasant acknowledgement which belongs to a man of the world。 Then he turned to scan me with his keen glance。 After some alight conversation; entered into on his part; I am certain; with an intention of discovering on what terms of confidence I stood with my uncle; he paused; and said gravely …
〃I am sent here with a message to you; sir; from a woman to whom you have shown kindness; and who is one of my penitents; in Antwerpone Bridget Fitzgerald。〃
〃Bridget Fitzgerald!〃 exclaimed I。 〃In Antwerp? Tell me; sir; all that you can about her。〃
〃There is much to be said;〃 he replied。 〃But may I inquire if this gentlemanif your uncle is acquainted with the particulars of which you and I stand informed?〃
〃All that I know; he knows;〃 said I; eagerly laying my hand on my uncle's arm; as he made a motion as if to quit the room。
〃Then I have to speak before two gentlemen who; however they may differ from me in faith; are yet fully impressed with the fact that there are evil powers going about continually to take cognizance of our evil thoughts: and; if their Master gives them power; to bring them into overt action。 Such is my theory of the nature of that sin; which I dare not disbelieveas some sceptics would have us dothe sin of witchcraft。 Of this deadly sin; you and I are aware; Bridget Fitzgerald has been guilty。 Since you saw her last; many prayers have been offered in our churches; many masses sung; many penances undergone; in order that; if God and the holy saints so willed it; her sin might be blotted out。 But it has not been so willed。〃
〃Explain to me;〃 said I; 〃who you are; and how you come connected with Bridget。 Why is she at Antwerp? I pray you; sir; tell me more。 If I am impatient; excuse me; I am ill and feverish; and in consequence bewildered。〃
There was something to me inexpressibly soothing in the tone of voice with which he began to narrate; as it were from the beginning; his acquaintance with Bridget。
〃I had known Mr。 and Mrs。 Starkey during their residence abroad; and so it fell out naturally that; when I came as chaplain to the Sherburnes at Stoney Hurst; our acquaintance was renewed; and thus I became the confessor of the whole family; isolated as they were from the offices of the Church; Sherburne being their nearest neighbour who professed the true faith。 Of course; you are aware that facts revealed in confession are sealed as in the grave; but I learnt enough of Bridget's character to be convinced that I had to do with no common woman; one powerful for good as for evil。 I believe that I was able to give her spiritual assistance from time to time; and that she looked upon me as a servant of that Holy Church; which has such wonderful power of moving men's hearts; and relieving them of the burden of their sins。 I have known her cross the moors on the wildest nights of storm; to confess and be absolved; and then she would return; calmed and subdued; to her daily work about her mistress; no one witting where she had been during the hours that most passed in sleep upon their beds。 After her daughter's departureafter Mary's mysterious disappearanceI had to impose many a long penance; in order to wash away the sin of impatient repining that was fast leading her into the deeper guilt of blasphemy。 She set out on that long journey of which you have possibly heardthat fruitless journey in search of Maryand during her absence; my superiors ordered my return to my former duties at Antwerp; and for many years I heard no more of Bridget。
〃Not many months ago; as I was passing homewards in the evening; along one of the streets near St。 Jacques; leading into the Meer Straet; I saw a woman sitting crouched up under the shrine of the Holy Mother of Sorrows。 Her hood was drawn over her head; so that the shadow caused by the light of the lamp above fell deep over her face; her hands were clasped round her knees。 I