第 51 节
作者:
津夏 更新:2021-04-30 15:57 字数:9322
waste。 What interested him was precisely what interested her; and she
could meet him at every point upon equal terms。 And yet under all her
learning and her firmness ran a sweet; womanly nature; peeping out in her
talk; shining in her greenish eyes; showing itself in a thousand subtle ways
which the dullest of men could read。 And he; though a bit of a prig and a
pedant; was by no means dull; and had honesty enough to confess when he
was in the wrong。
〃I don't know how to apologise to you;〃 he said in his shame…faced
fashion one day; when he had progressed so far as to be able to sit in an
arm… chair with his leg upon another one; 〃I feel that I have been quite in
the wrong。〃
〃Why; then?〃
〃Over this woman question。 I used to think that a woman must
inevitably lose something of her charm if she took up such studies。〃
〃Oh; you don't think they are necessarily unsexed; then?〃 she cried;
with a mischievous smile。
〃Please don't recall my idiotic expression。〃
〃I feel so pleased that I should have helped in changing your views。 I
think that it is the most sincere compliment that I have ever had paid me。〃
〃At any rate; it is the truth;〃 said he; and was happy all night at the
remembrance of the flush of pleasure which made her pale face look quite
comely for the instant。
177
… Page 178…
ROUND THE RED LAMP
For; indeed; he was already far past the stage when he would
acknowledge her as the equal of any other woman。 Already he could not
disguise from himself that she had become the one woman。 Her dainty
skill; her gentle touch; her sweet presence; the community of their tastes;
had all united to hopelessly upset his previous opinions。 It was a dark
day for him now when his convalescence allowed her to miss a visit; and
darker still that other one which he saw approaching when all occasion for
her visits would be at an end。 It came round at last; however; and he felt
that his whole life's fortune would hang upon the issue of that final
interview。 He was a direct man by nature; so he laid his hand upon hers
as it felt for his pulse; and he asked her if she would be his wife。
〃What; and unite the practices?〃 said she。
He started in pain and anger。
〃Surely you do not attribute any such base motive to me!〃 he cried。
〃I love you as unselfishly as ever a woman was loved。〃
〃No; I was wrong。 It was a foolish speech;〃 said she; moving her
chair a little back; and tapping her stethoscope upon her knee。 〃Forget
that I ever said it。 I am so sorry to cause you any disappointment; and I
appreciate most highly the honour which you do me; but what you ask is
quite impossible。〃
With another woman he might have urged the point; but his instincts
told him that it was quite useless with this one。 Her tone of voice was
conclusive。 He said nothing; but leaned back in his chair a stricken man。
〃I am so sorry;〃 she said again。 〃If I had known what was passing in
your mind I should have told you earlier that I intended to devote my life
entirely to science。 There are many women with a capacity for marriage;
but few with a taste for biology。 I will remain true to my own line; then。
I came down here while waiting for an opening in the Paris Physiological
Laboratory。 I have just heard that there is a vacancy for me there; and so
you will be troubled no more by my intrusion upon your practice。 I have
done you an injustice just as you did me one。 I thought you narrow and
pedantic; with no good quality。 I have learned during your illness to
appreciate you better; and the recollection of our friendship will always be
a very pleasant one to me。〃
178
… Page 179…
ROUND THE RED LAMP
And so it came about that in a very few weeks there was only one
doctor in Hoyland。 But folks noticed that the one had aged many years
in a few months; that a weary sadness lurked always in the depths of his
blue eyes; and that he was less concerned than ever with the eligible young
ladies whom chance; or their careful country mammas; placed in his way。
179
… Page 180…
ROUND THE RED LAMP
THE SURGEON TALKS。
〃Men die of the diseases which they have studied most;〃 remarked
the surgeon; snipping off the end of a cigar with all his professional
neatness and finish。 〃It's as if the morbid condition was an evil creature
which; when it found itself closely hunted; flew at the throat of its pursuer。
If you worry the microbes too much they may worry you。 I've seen cases
of it; and not necessarily in microbic diseases either。 There was; of
course; the well…known instance of Liston and the aneurism; and a dozen
others that I could mention。 You couldn't have a clearer case than that of
poor old Walker of St。 Christopher's。 Not heard of it? Well; of course;
it was a little before your time; but I wonder that it should have been
forgotten。 You youngsters are so busy in keeping up to the day that you
lose a good deal that is interesting of yesterday。
〃Walker was one of the best men in Europe on nervous disease。 You
must have read his little book on sclerosis of the posterior columns。 It's
as interesting as a novel; and epoch…making in its way。 He worked like a
horse; did Walkerhuge consulting practicehours a day in the clinical
wardsconstant original investigations。 And then he enjoyed himself
also。 ‘De mortuis;' of course; but still it's an open secret among all who
knew him。 If he died at forty…five; he crammed eighty years into it。
The marvel was that he could have held on so long at the pace at which he
was going。 But he took it beautifully when it came。
〃I was his clinical assistant at the time。 Walker was lecturing on
locomotor ataxia to a wardful of youngsters。 He was explaining that one
of the early signs of the complaint was that the patient could not put his
heels together with his eyes shut without staggering。 As he spoke; he
suited the action to the word。 I don't suppose the boys noticed anything。
I did; and so did he; though he finished his lecture without a sign。
〃When it was over he came into my room and lit a cigarette。
〃‘Just run over my reflexes; Smith;' said he。
〃There was hardly a trace of them left。 I tapped away at his knee…
tendon and might as well have tried to get a jerk out of that sofa…cushion。
He stood with his eyes shut again; and he swayed like a bush in the wind。
180
… Page 181…
ROUND THE RED LAMP
〃‘So;' said he; ‘it was not intercostal neuralgia after all。'
〃Then I knew that he had had the lightning pains; and that the case was
complete。 There was nothing to say; so I sat looking at him while he
puffed and puffed at his cigarette。 Here he was; a man in the prime of
life; one of the handsomest men in London; with money; fame; social
success; everything at his feet; and now; without a moment's warning; he
was told that inevitable death lay before him; a death accompanied by
more refined and lingering tortures than if he were bound upon a Red
Indian stake。 He sat in the middle of the blue cigarette cloud with his
eyes cast down; and the slightest little tightening of his lips。 Then he
rose with a motion of his arms; as one who throws off old thoughts and
enters upon a new course。
〃‘Better put this thing straight at once;' said he。 ‘I must make some
fresh arrangements。 May I use your paper and envelopes?'
〃He settled himself at my desk and he wrote half a dozen letters。 It is
not a breach of confidence to sa