第 46 节
作者:
小秋 更新:2021-03-11 17:56 字数:9322
quiet; she was silent。 After an interval; I heard her breathe a
long…drawn sigh of relief。
〃I am afraid I have surprised you;〃 she said。 〃Helena brings the
dreadful time back to me〃 She stopped and shuddered。
〃Don't speak of Helena; my dear。〃
〃But I am afraid you will thinkbecause I have said strange
thingsthat I have been talking at random;〃 she insisted。 〃The
doctor will say that; if you meet with him。 He believes I am
deluded by a dream。 I tried to think so myself。 It was of no use;
I am quite sure he is wrong。〃
I privately determined to watch for the doctor's arrival; and to
consult with him。 Eunice went on:
〃I have the story of a terrible night to tell you; but I haven't
the courage to tell it now。 Why shouldn't you come back with me
to the place that I am staying at? A pleasant farm…house; and
such kind people。 You might read the account of that night in my
journal。 I shall not regret the misery of having written it; if
it helps you to find out how this hateful second self of mine has
come to me。 Hush! I want to ask you something。 Do you think
Helena is in the house?〃
〃Noshe has gone out。〃
〃Did she say that herself? Are you sure?〃
〃Quite sure。〃
She decided on going back to the farm; while Helena was out of
the way。 We left the garden together。 For the first time; my
companion noticed the portfolio。 I happened to be carrying it in
the hand that was nearest to her; as she walked by my side。
〃Where did you get that?〃 she asked。
It was needless to reply in words。 My hesitation spoke for me。
〃Carry it in your other hand;〃 she said〃the hand that's
furthest away from me。 I don't want to see it! Do you mind
waiting a moment while I find Selina? You will go to the farm
with us; won't you?〃
I had to look over the letters; in Eunice's own interests; and I
begged her to let me defer my visit to the farm until the next
day。 She consented; after making me promise to keep my
appointment。 It was of some importance to her; she told me; that
I should make acquaintance with the farmer and his wife and
children; and tell her how I liked them。 Her plans for the future
depended on what those good people might be willing to do。 When
she had recovered her health; it was impossible for her to go
home again while Helena remained in the house。 She had resolved
to earn her own living; if she could get employment as a
governess。 The farmer's children liked her; she had already
helped their mother in teaching them; and there was reason to
hope that their father would see his way to employing her
permanently。 His house offered the great advantage of being near
enough to the town to enable her to hear news of the Minister's
progress toward recovery; and to see him herself when safe
opportunities offered; from time to ti me。 As for her salary;
what did she care about money? Anything would be acceptable; if
the good man would only realize her hopes for the future。
It was disheartening to hear that hope; at her age; began and
ended within such narrow limits as these。 No prudent man would
have tried to persuade her; as I now did; that the idea of
reconciliation offered the better hope of the two。
〃Suppose I see Mr。 Philip Dunboyne when I go back to London;〃 I
began; 〃what shall I say to him?〃
〃Say I have forgiven him。〃
〃And suppose;〃 I went on; 〃that the blame really rests; where you
all believe it to rest; with Helena。 If that young man returns to
you; truly ashamed of himself; truly penitent; will you?〃
She resolutely interrupted me: 〃No!〃
〃Oh; Eunice; you surely mean Yes?〃
〃I mean No!〃
〃Why?〃
〃Don't ask me! Good…by till to…morrow。〃
CHAPTER XLII。
THE QUAINT PHILOSOPHER。
No person came to my room; and nothing happened to interrupt me
while I was reading Mr。 Philip Dunboyne's letters。
One of them; let me say at once; produced a very disagreeable
impression on me。 I have unexpectedly discovered Mrs。
Tenbruggenin a postscript。 She is making a living as a Medical
Rubber (or Masseuse); and is in professional attendance on Mr。
Dunboyne the elder。 More of this; a little further on。
Having gone through the whole collection of young Dunboyne's
letters; I set myself to review the differing conclusions which
the correspondence had produced on my mind。
I call the papers submitted to me a correspondence; because the
greater part of Philip's letters exhibit notes in pencil;
evidently added by Helena。 These express; for the most part; the
interpretation which she had placed on passages that perplexed or
displeased her; and they have; as Philip's rejoinders show; been
employed as materials when she wrote her replies。
On reflection; I find myself troubled by complexities and
contradictions in the view presented of this young man's
character。 To decide positively whether I can justify to myself
and to my regard for Eunice; an attempt to reunite the lovers;
requires more time for consideration than I can reasonably expect
that Helena's patience will allow。 Having a quiet hour or two
still before me; I have determined to make extracts from the
letters for my own use; with the intention of referring to them
while I am still in doubt which way my decision ought to incline。
I shall present them here; to speak for themselves。 Is there any
objection to this? None that I can see。
In the first place; those extracts have a value of their own。
They add necessary information to the present history of events。
In the second place; I am under no obligation to Mr。 Gracedieu's
daughter which forbids me to make use of her portfolio。 I told
her that I only consented to receive it; under reserve of my own
right of actionand her assent to that stipulation was expressed
in the clearest terms。
EXTRACTS FROM MR。 PHILIP DUNBOYNE'S LETTERS。
First Extract。
You blame me; dear Helena; for not having paid proper attention
to the questions put to me in your last letter。 I have only been
waiting to make up my mind; before I replied。
First question: Do I think it advisable that you should write to
my father? No; my dear; I beg you will defer writing; until you
hear from me again。
Second question: Considering that he is still a stranger to you;
is there any harm in your asking me what sort of man my father
is? No harm; my sweet one; but; as you will presently see; I am
afraid you have addressed yourself to the wrong person。
My father is kind; in his own odd wayand learned; and richa
more high…minded and honorable man (as I have every reason to
believe) doesn't live。 But if you ask me which he prefers; his
books or his son; I hope I do him no injustice when I answer; his
books。 His reading and his writing are obstacles between us which
I have never been able to overcome。 This is the more to be
regretted because he is charming; on the few occasions when I
find him disengaged。 If you wish I knew more about my father; we
are in complete agreement as usualI wish; too。
But there is a dear friend of yours and mine; who is just the
person we want to help us。 Need I say that I allude to Mrs。
Staveley?
I called on her yesterday; not long after she had paid a visit to
my father。 Luck had favored her。 She arrived just at the time
when hunger had obliged him to shut up his books; and ring for
something to eat。 Mrs。 Staveley secured a favorable reception
with her customary tact and delicacy。 He had a fowl for his
dinner。 She knows his weakness of old; she volunteered to carve
it for him。
If I can only repeat what this clever woman told me of their
talk; you will have a portrait of Mr。 Dunboyne the eldernot
perhaps a highly…finished picture; but; as I hope and believe; a
good likeness。
Mrs。 Staveley began by complaining to him of the conduct of his
son。 I had promised to write to her; and I had never kept my
word。 She had reasons for being especially interested in my plans
and prospects; just then; knowing me to be attached (please take
notice that I am quoting her own language) to a charming friend
of hers; whom I had first met at her house。 To aggravate the
disappointment that I had inflicted; the young lady had neglected
her; too。 No letters; no information。 Perhaps my father would
kindly enlighten her? Was the affair going on? or was it broken
off?
My father held out his plate and asked for the other wing of the
fowl。 〃It isn't a bad one for London;〃 he said; 〃won't you have
some yourself?〃
〃I don't seem to have interested you;〃 Mrs。 Staveley remarked。
〃What did you expect me to be interested in?〃 my father inquired。
〃I was absorbed in the fowl。 Favor me by returning to the
subject。〃
Mrs。 Staveley admits that she answered this rather sharply: 〃The
subject; sir; was your son's admiration for a charming girl: one
of the daughters of Mr。 Gracedieu; the famous preacher。〃
My father is too well…bred to speak to a lady while his attention
is absorbed by a fowl。 He finished the second wing; and then he
asked if 〃Philip was engaged to be married。〃
〃I am not quite sure;〃 Mrs。 Staveley confessed。
〃Then; my dear friend; we will wait till we _are_ sure。〃
〃But; Mr。 Dunboyne; there is really no need to wait。 I suppose
your son comes here; now and then; to see you?〃
〃My son is m