beerier；　would　frantically　try　to　tear　themselves　away　from　his
  ministration。　　Some　of　the　inscriptions　accompanying　the　banners
  were　of　a　highly　determined　character；　as　'We　never；　never　will
  give　up　the　temperance　cause；'　with　similar　sound　resolutions
  rather　suggestive　to　the　profane　mind　of　Mrs。　Micawber's　'I　never
  will　desert　Mr。　Micawber；'　and　of　Mr。　Micawber's　retort；　'Really；
  my　dear；　I　am　not　aware　that　you　were　ever　required　by　any　human
  being　to　do　anything　of　the　sort。'
  At　intervals；　a　gloom　would　fall　on　the　passing　members　of　the
  procession；　for　which　I　was　at　first　unable　to　account。　　But　this　I
  discovered；　after　a　little　observation；　to　be　occasioned　by　the
  coming　on　of　the　executioners；　…　the　terrible　official　beings　who
  were　to　make　the　speeches　by…and…by；　…　who　were　distributed　in　open
  carriages　at　various　points　of　the　cavalcade。　　A　dark　cloud　and　a
  sensation　of　dampness；　as　from　many　wet　blankets；　invariably
  preceded　the　rolling　on　of　the　dreadful　cars　containing　these
  headsmen；　and　I　noticed　that　the　wretched　people　who　closely
  followed　them；　and　who　were　in　a　manner　forced　to　contemplate　their
  folded　arms；　complacent　countenances；　and　threatening　lips；　were
  more　overshadowed　by　the　cloud　and　damp　than　those　in　front。
  Indeed；　I　perceived　in　some　of　these　so　moody　an　implacability
  towards　the　magnates　of　the　scaffold；　and　so　plain　a　desire　to　tear
  them　limb　from　limb；　that　I　would　respectfully　suggest　to　the
  managers　the　expediency　of　conveying　the　executioners　to　the　scene
  of　their　dismal　labours　by　unfrequented　ways；　and　in　closely…tilted
  carts；　next　Whitsuntide。
  The　procession　was　composed　of　a　series　of　smaller　processions；
  which　had　come　together；　each　from　its　own　metropolitan　district。
  An　infusion　of　allegory　became　perceptible　when　patriotic　Peckham
  advanced。　　So　I　judged；　from　the　circumstance　of　Peckham's
  unfurling　a　silken　banner　that　fanned　heaven　and　earth　with　the
  words；　'The　Peckham　Lifeboat。'　　No　boat　being　in　attendance；　though
  life；　in　the　likeness　of　'a　gallant；　gallant　crew；'　in　nautical
  uniform；　followed　the　flag；　I　was　led　to　meditate　on　the　fact　that
  Peckham　is　described　by　geographers　as　an　inland　settlement；　with
  no　larger　or　nearer　shore…line　than　the　towing…path　of　the　Surrey
  Canal；　on　which　stormy　station　I　had　been　given　to　understand　no
  lifeboat　exists。　　Thus　I　deduced　an　allegorical　meaning；　and　came
  to　the　conclusion；　that　if　patriotic　Peckham　picked　a　peck　of
  pickled　poetry；　this　WAS　the　peck　of　pickled　poetry　which　patriotic
  Peckham　picked。
  I　have　observed　that　the　aggregate　procession　was　on　the　whole
  pleasant　to　see。　　I　made　use　of　that　qualified　expression　with　a
  direct　meaning；　which　I　will　now　explain。　　It　involves　the　title　of
  this　paper；　and　a　little　fair　trying　of　teetotalism　by　its　own
  tests。　　There　were　many　people　on　foot；　and　many　people　in　vehicles
  of　various　kinds。　　The　former　were　pleasant　to　see；　and　the　latter
  were　not　pleasant　to　see；　for　the　reason　that　I　never；　on　any
  occasion　or　under　any　circumstances；　have　beheld　heavier
  overloading　of　horses　than　in　this　public　show。　　Unless　the
  imposition　of　a　great　van　laden　with　from　ten　to　twenty　people　on　a
  single　horse　be　a　moderate　tasking　of　the　poor　creature；　then　the
  temperate　use　of　horses　was　immoderate　and　cruel。　　From　the
  smallest　and　lightest　horse　to　the　largest　and　heaviest；　there　were
  many　instances　in　which　the　beast　of　burden　was　so　shamefully
  overladen；　that　the　Society　for　the　Prevention　of　Cruelty　to
  Animals　have　frequently　interposed　in　less　gross　cases。
  Now；　I　have　always　held　that　there　may　be；　and　that　there
  unquestionably　is；　such　a　thing　as　use　without　abuse；　and　that
  therefore　the　total　abolitionists　are　irrational　and　wrong…headed。
  But　the　procession　completely　converted　me。　　For　so　large　a　number
  of　the　people　using　draught…horses　in　it　were　so　clearly　unable　to
  use　them　without　abusing　them；　that　I　perceived　total　abstinence
  from　horseflesh　to　be　the　only　remedy　of　which　the　case　admitted。
  As　it　is　all　one　to　teetotalers　whether　you　take　half　a　pint　of
  beer　or　half　a　gallon；　so　it　was　all　one　here　whether　the　beast　of
  burden　were　a　pony　or　a　cart…horse。　　Indeed；　my　case　had　the
  special　strength　that　the　half…pint　quadruped　underwent　as　much
  suffering　as　the　half…gallon　quadruped。　　Moral：　　total　abstinence
  from　horseflesh　through　the　whole　length　and　breadth　of　the　scale。
  This　pledge　will　be　in　course　of　administration　to　all　teetotal
  processionists；　not　pedestrians；　at　the　publishing　office　of　'All
  the　Year　Round；'　on　the　1st　day　of　April；　1870。
  Observe　a　point　for　consideration。　　This　procession　comprised　many
  persons　in　their　gigs；　broughams；　tax…carts；　barouches；　chaises；
  and　what　not；　who　were　merciful　to　the　dumb　beasts　that　drew　them；
  and　did　not　overcharge　their　strength。　　What　is　to　be　done　with
  those　unoffending　persons？　　I　will　not　run　amuck　and　vilify　and
  defame　them；　as　teetotal　tracts　and　platforms　would　most　assuredly
  do；　if　the　question　were　one　of　drinking　instead　of　driving：　　I
  merely　ask　what　is　to　be　done　with　them！　　The　reply　admits　of　no
  dispute　whatever。　　Manifestly；　in　strict　accordance　with　teetotal
  doctrines；　THEY　must　come　in　too；　and　take　the　total　abstinence
  from　horseflesh　pledge。　　It　is　not　pretended　that　those　members　of
  the　procession　misused　certain　auxiliaries　which　in　most　countries
  and　all　ages　have　been　bestowed　upon　man　for　his　use；　but　it　is
  undeniable　that　other　members　of　the　procession　did。　　Teetotal
  mathematics　demonstrate　that　the　less　includes　the　greater；　that
  the　guilty　include　the　innocent；　the　blind　the　seeing；　the　deaf　the
  hearing；　the　dumb　the　speaking；　the　drunken　the　sober。　　If　any　of
  the　moderate　users　of　draught…cattle　in　question　should　deem　that
  there　is　any　gentle　violence　done　to　their　reason　by　these　elements
  of　logic；　they　are　invited　to　come　out　of　the　procession　next
  Whitsuntide；　and　look　at　it　from　my　window。
  End