第 31 节
作者:
恐龙王 更新:2021-03-08 19:21 字数:9322
conviction that Pickford is wholly utilitarian and unimaginative; I
proceeded on my way。
It is a mercy I have not a red and green lamp and a night…bell at
my door; for in my very young days I was taken to so many lyings…in
that I wonder I escaped becoming a professional martyr to them in
after…life。 I suppose I had a very sympathetic nurse; with a large
circle of married acquaintance。 However that was; as I continued
my walk through Dullborough; I found many houses to be solely
associated in my mind with this particular interest。 At one little
greengrocer's shop; down certain steps from the street; I remember
to have waited on a lady who had had four children (I am afraid to
write five; though I fully believe it was five) at a birth。 This
meritorious woman held quite a reception in her room on the morning
when I was introduced there; and the sight of the house brought
vividly to my mind how the four (five) deceased young people lay;
side by side; on a clean cloth on a chest of drawers; reminding me
by a homely association; which I suspect their complexion to have
assisted; of pigs' feet as they are usually displayed at a neat
tripe…shop。 Hot candle was handed round on the occasion; and I
further remembered as I stood contemplating the greengrocer's; that
a subscription was entered into among the company; which became
extremely alarming to my consciousness of having pocket…money on my
person。 This fact being known to my conductress; whoever she was;
I was earnestly exhorted to contribute; but resolutely declined:
therein disgusting the company; who gave me to understand that I
must dismiss all expectations of going to Heaven。
How does it happen that when all else is change wherever one goes;
there yet seem; in every place; to be some few people who never
alter? As the sight of the greengrocer's house recalled these
trivial incidents of long ago; the identical greengrocer appeared
on the steps; with his hands in his pockets; and leaning his
shoulder against the door…post; as my childish eyes had seen him
many a time; indeed; there was his old mark on the door…post yet;
as if his shadow had become a fixture there。 It was he himself; he
might formerly have been an old…looking young man; or he might now
be a young…looking old man; but there he was。 In walking along the
street; I had as yet looked in vain for a familiar face; or even a
transmitted face; here was the very greengrocer who had been
weighing and handling baskets on the morning of the reception。 As
he brought with him a dawning remembrance that he had had no
proprietary interest in those babies; I crossed the road; and
accosted him on the subject。 He was not in the least excited or
gratified; or in any way roused; by the accuracy of my
recollection; but said; Yes; summut out of the common … he didn't
remember how many it was (as if half…a…dozen babes either way made
no difference) … had happened to a Mrs。 What's…her…name; as once
lodged there … but he didn't call it to mind; particular。 Nettled
by this phlegmatic conduct; I informed him that I had left the town
when I was a child。 He slowly returned; quite unsoftened; and not
without a sarcastic kind of complacency; HAD I? Ah! And did I
find it had got on tolerably well without me? Such is the
difference (I thought; when I had left him a few hundred yards
behind; and was by so much in a better temper) between going away
from a place and remaining in it。 I had no right; I reflected; to
be angry with the greengrocer for his want of interest; I was
nothing to him: whereas he was the town; the cathedral; the
bridge; the river; my childhood; and a large slice of my life; to
me。
Of course the town had shrunk fearfully; since I was a child there。
I had entertained the impression that the High…street was at least
as wide as Regent…street; London; or the Italian Boulevard at
Paris。 I found it little better than a lane。 There was a public
clock in it; which I had supposed to be the finest clock in the
world: whereas it now turned out to be as inexpressive; moon…
faced; and weak a clock as ever I saw。 It belonged to a Town Hall;
where I had seen an Indian (who I now suppose wasn't an Indian)
swallow a sword (which I now suppose he didn't)。 The edifice had
appeared to me in those days so glorious a structure; that I had
set it up in my mind as the model on which the Genie of the Lamp
built the palace for Aladdin。 A mean little brick heap; like a
demented chapel; with a few yawning persons in leather gaiters; and
in the last extremity for something to do; lounging at the door
with their hands in their pockets; and calling themselves a Corn
Exchange!
The Theatre was in existence; I found; on asking the fishmonger;
who had a compact show of stock in his window; consisting of a sole
and a quart of shrimps … and I resolved to comfort my mind by going
to look at it。 Richard the Third; in a very uncomfortable cloak;
had first appeared to me there; and had made my heart leap with
terror by backing up against the stage…box in which I was posted;
while struggling for life against the virtuous Richmond。 It was
within those walls that I had learnt as from a page of English
history; how that wicked King slept in war…time on a sofa much too
short for him; and how fearfully his conscience troubled his boots。
There; too; had I first seen the funny countryman; but countryman
of noble principles; in a flowered waistcoat; crunch up his little
hat and throw it on the ground; and pull off his coat; saying; 'Dom
thee; squire; coom on with thy fistes then!' At which the lovely
young woman who kept company with him (and who went out gleaning;
in a narrow white muslin apron with five beautiful bars of five
different…coloured ribbons across it) was so frightened for his
sake; that she fainted away。 Many wondrous secrets of Nature had I
come to the knowledge of in that sanctuary: of which not the least
terrific were; that the witches in Macbeth bore an awful
resemblance to the Thanes and other proper inhabitants of Scotland;
and that the good King Duncan couldn't rest in his grave; but was
constantly coming out of it and calling himself somebody else。 To
the Theatre; therefore; I repaired for consolation。 But I found
very little; for it was in a bad and declining way。 A dealer in
wine and bottled beer had already squeezed his trade into the box…
office; and the theatrical money was taken … when it came … in a
kind of meat…safe in the passage。 The dealer in wine and bottled
beer must have insinuated himself under the stage too; for he
announced that he had various descriptions of alcoholic drinks 'in
the wood;' and there was no possible stowage for the wood anywhere
else。 Evidently; he was by degrees eating the establishment away
to the core; and would soon have sole possession of it。 It was To
Let; and hopelessly so; for its old purposes; and there had been no
entertainment within its walls for a long time except a Panorama;
and even that had been announced as 'pleasingly instructive;' and I
know too well the fatal meaning and the leaden import of those
terrible expressions。 No; there was no comfort in the Theatre。 It
was mysteriously gone; like my own youth。 Unlike my own youth; it
might be coming back some day; but there was little promise of it。
As the town was placarded with references to the Dullborough
Mechanics' Institution; I thought I would go and look at that
establishment next。 There had been no such thing in the town; in
my young day; and it occurred to me that its extreme prosperity
might have brought adversity upon the Drama。 I found the
Institution with some difficulty; and should scarcely have known
that I had found it if I had judged from its external appearance
only; but this was attributable to its never having been finished;
and having no front: consequently; it led a modest and retired
existence up a stable…yard。 It was (as I learnt; on inquiry) a
most flourishing Institution; and of the highest benefit to the
town: two triumphs which I was glad to understand were not at all
impaired by the seeming drawbacks that no mechanics belonged to it;
and that it was steeped in debt to the chimney…pots。 It had a
large room; which was approached by an infirm step…ladder: the
builder having declined to construct the intended staircase;
without a present payment in cash; which Dullborough (though
profoundly appreciative of the Institution) seemed unaccountably
bashful about subscribing。 The large room had cost … or would;
when paid for … five hundred pounds; and it had more mortar in it
and more echoes; than one might have expected to get for the money。
It was fitted up with a platform; and the usual lecturing tools;
including a large black board of a menacing appearance。 On
referring to lists of the courses of lectures that had been given
in this thriving Hall; I fancied I detected a shyn