his　feet；　and　after　stamping　with　his　feet　to　throw　his　cap　at　her；　and　after　the　cap　a　cudgel　which　hit　her　just　upon　the　pate；　and　made　her　quickly　stretch　her　legs。
  When　Vardiello　saw　this　sad　accident；　he　bethought　himself　how　to　remedy　the　evil；　and　making　a　virtue　of　necessity；　in　order　to　prevent　the　eggs　growing　cold；　he　set　himself　down　upon　the　nest；　but　in　doing　so；　he　gave　the　eggs　an　unlucky　blow；　and　quickly　made　an　omelet　of　them。　In　despair　at　what　he　had　done；　he　was　on　the　point　of　knocking　his　head　against　the　wall；　at　last；　however；　as　all　grief　turns　to　hunger；　feeling　his　stomach　begin　to　grumble；　he　resolved　to　eat　up　the　hen。　So　he　plucked　her；　and　sticking　her　upon　a　spit；　he　made　a　great　fire；　and　set　to　work　to　roast　her。　And　when　she　was　cooked；　Vardiello；　to　do　everything　in　due　order；　spread　a　clean　cloth　upon　an　old　chest；　and　then；　taking　a　flagon；　he　went　down　into　the　cellar　to　draw　some　wine。　But　just　as　he　was　in　the　midst　of　drawing　the　wine；　he　heard　a　noise；　a　disturbance；　an　uproar　in　the　house；　which　seemed　like　the　clattering　of　horses'　hoofs。　Whereat　starting　up　in　alarm　and　turning　his　eyes；　he　saw　a　big　tom…cat；　which　had　run　off　with　the　hen；　spit　and　all；　and　another　cat　chasing　after　him；　mewing；　and　crying　out　for　a　part。
  Vardiello；　in　order　to　set　this　mishap　to　rights；　darted　upon　the　cat　like　an　unchained　lion；　and　in　his　haste　he　left　the　tap　of　the　barrel　running。　And　after　chasing　the　cat　through　every　hole　and　corner　of　the　house；　he　recovered　the　hen；　but　the　cask　had　meanwhile　all　run　out；　and　when　Vardiello　returned；　and　saw　the　wine　running　about；　he　let　the　cask　of　his　soul　empty　itself　through　the　tap…holes　of　his　eyes。　But　at　last　judgment　came　to　his　aid　and　he　hit　upon　a　plan　to　remedy　the　mischief；　and　prevent　his　mother's　finding　out　what　had　happened；　so；　taking　a　sack　of　flour；　filled　full　to　the　mouth；　he　sprinkled　it　over　the　wine　on　the　floor。
  But　when　he　meanwhile　reckoned　up　on　his　fingers　all　the　disasters　he　had　met　with；　and　thought　to　himself　that；　from　the　number　of　fooleries　he　had　committed；　he　must　have　lost　the　game　in　the　good　graces　of　Grannonia；　he　resolved　in　his　heart　not　to　let　his　mother　see　him　again　alive。　So　thrusting　his　hand　into　the　jar　of　pickled　walnuts　which　his　mother　had　said　contained　poison；　he　never　stopped　eating　until　he　came　to　the　bottom；　and　when　he　had　right　well　filled　his　stomach　he　went　and　hid　himself　in　the　oven。
  In　the　meanwhile　his　mother　returned；　and　stood　knocking　for　a　long　time　at　the　door；　but　at　last；　seeing　that　no　one　came；　she　gave　it　a　kick；　and　going　in；　she　called　her　son　at　the　top　of　her　voice。　But　as　nobody　answered；　she　imagined　that　some　mischief　must　have　happened；　and　with　increased　lamentation　she　went　on　crying　louder　and　louder；　〃Vardiello！　Vardiello！　are　you　deaf；　that　you　don't　hear？　Have　you　the　cramp；　that　you　don't　run？　Have　you　the　pip；　that　you　don't　answer？　Where　are　you；　you　rogue？　Where　are　you　hidden；　you　naughty　fellow？〃
  Vardiello；　on　hearing　all　this　hubbub　and　abuse；　cried　out　at　last　with　a　piteous　voice；　〃Here　I　am！　here　I　am　in　the　oven；　but　you　will　never　see　me　again；　mother！〃
  〃Why　so？〃　said　the　poor　mother。
  〃Because　I　am　poisoned；〃　replied　the　son。
  〃Alas！　alas！〃　cried　Grannonia；　〃how　came　you　to　do　that？　What　cause　have　you　had　to　commit　this　homicide？　And　who　has　given　you　poison？〃　Then　Vardiello　told　her；　one　after　another；　all　the　pretty　things　he　had　done；　on　which　account　he　wished　to　die　and　not　to　remain　any　longer　a　laughing…stock　in　the　world。
  The　poor　woman；　on　hearing　all　this；　was　miserable　and　wretched；　and　she　had　enough　to　do　and　to　say　to　drive　this　melancholy　whimsey　out　of　Vardiello's　head。　And　being　infatuated　and　dotingly　fond　of　him；　she　gave　him　some　nice　sweetmeats；　and　so　put　the　affair　of　the　pickled　walnuts　out　of　his　head；　and　convinced　him　that　they　were　not　poison；　but　good　and　comforting　to　the　stomach。　And　having　thus　pacified　him　with　cheering　words；　and　showered　on　him　a　thousand　caresses；　she　drew　him　out　of　the　oven。　Then　giving　him　a　fine　piece　of　cloth；　she　bade　him　go　and　sell　it；　but　cautioning　him　not　to　do　business　with　folks　of　too　many　words。
  〃Tut；　tut！〃　said　Vardiello；　〃let　me　alone；　I　know　what　I'm　about；　never　fear。〃　So　saying；　he　took　the　cloth；　and　went　his　way　through　the　city　of　Naples；　crying；　〃Cloth！　cloth！〃　But　whenever　any　one　asked　him；　〃What　cloth　have　you　there？〃　he　replied；　〃You　are　no　customer　for　me；　you　are　a　man　of　too　many　words。〃　And　when　another　said　to　him；　〃How　do　you　sell　your　cloth？〃　he　called　him　a　chatterbox；　who　deafened　him　with　his　noise。　At　length　he　chanced　to　espy；　in　the　courtyard　of　a　house　which　was　deserted　on　account　of　the　Monaciello；　a　plaster　statue；　and　being　tired　out；　and　wearied　with　going　about　and　about；　he　sat　himself　down　on　a　bench。　But　not　seeing　any　one　astir　in　the　house；　which　looked　like　a　sacked　village；　he　was　lost　in　amazement；　and　said　to　the　statue：　〃Tell　me；　comrade；　does　no　one　live　in　this　house？〃　Vardiello　waited　awhile；　but　as　the　statue　gave　no　answer；　he　thought　this　surely　was　a　man　of　few　words。　So　he　said；　〃Friend；　will　you　buy　my　cloth？　I'll　sell　it　you　cheap。〃　And　seeing　that　the　statue　still　remained　dumb；　he　exclaimed；　〃Faith；　then；　I've　found　my　man　at　last！　There；　take　the　cloth；　examine　it；　and　give　me　what　you　will；　to…morrow　I'll　return　for　the　money。〃
  So　saying　Vardiello　left　the　cloth　on　the　spot　where　he　had　been　sitting；　and　the　first　mother's　son　who　passed　that　way　found　the　prize　and　carried　it　off。
  When　Vardiello　returned　home　without　the　cloth；　and　told　his　mother　all　that　had　happened；　she　wellnigh　swooned　away；　and　said　to　him；　〃When　will　you　put　that　headpiece　of　yours　in　order？　See　now　what　tricks　you　have　played　meonly　think！　But　I　am　myself　to　blame；　for　being　too　tender…hearted；　instead　of　having　given　you　a　good　beating　at　first；　and　now　I　perceive　that　a　pitiful　doctor　only　makes　the　wound　incurable。　But　you'll　go　on　with　your　pranks　until　at　last　we　come　to　a　serious　falling…out；　and　then　there　will　be　a　long　reckoning；　my　lad！〃
  〃Softly；　mother；〃　replied　Vardiello；　〃matters　are　not　so　bad　as　they　seem；　do　you　want　more　than　crown…pieces　brand　new　from　the　mint？　Do　you　think　me　a　fool；　and　that　I　don't　know　what　I　am　about？　To…morrow　is　not　yet　here。　Wait　awhile；　and　you　shall　see　whether　I　know　how　to　fit　a　handle　to　a　shovel。〃
  The　next　morning；　as　soon　as　the　shades　of　Night；　pursued　by　the　constables　of　the　Sun；　had　fled　the　country；　Vardiello　repaired　to　the　courtyard　where　the　statue　stood；　and　said；　〃Good…day；　friend！　Can　you　give　me　those　few　pence　you　owe　me？　Come；　quick；　pay　me　for　the　cloth！〃　But　when　he　saw　that　the　statue　remained　speechless；　he　took　up　a　stone　and　hurled　it　at　its　breast　with　such　force　that　it　burst　a　vein；　which　proved；　indeed；　the　cure　to　his　own　malady；　for　some　pieces　of　the　statue　falling　off；　he　discovered　a　pot　full　of　golden　crown…pieces。　Then　taking　it　in　both　his　hands；　off　he　ran　home；　head　over　heels；　as　far　as　he　could　scamper；　crying　out；　〃Mother；　mother！　see　here！　what　a　lot　of　red　lupins　I've　got。　How　many！　how　many！〃
  His　mother；　seeing　the　crown…pieces；　and　knowing　very　well　that　Vardiello　would　soon　make　the　matter　public；　told　him　to　stand　at　the　door　until　the　man　with　milk　and　new…made　cheese　came　past；　as　she　wanted　to　buy　a　pennyworth　of　milk。　So　Vardiello；　who　was　a　great　glutton；　went　quickly　and　seated　himself　at　the　door；　and　his　mother　showered　down　from　the　window　above　raisins　and　dried　figs　for　more　than　half　an　hour。　Whereupon　Vardiello；　picking　them　up　as　fast　as　he　could；　cried　aloud；　〃Mother；　mother！　bring　out　some　baskets；　give　me　some　bowls！　Here；　quick　with　the　tubs　and　buckets！　for　if　it　goes　on　to　rain　thus　we　shall　be　rich　in　a　trice。〃　And　when　he　had　eaten　his　fill　Vardiello　went　up　to　sleep。
  It　happened　one　day　that　two　countrymenthe　food　and　life…blood　of　the　law…courtsfell　out；　and　went　to　law　about　a　gold　　crown…piece　which　they　had　found　on　the　ground。　And　Vardiello　passing　by　said；　〃What　jackasses　you　are　to　quarrel　about　a　red　lupin　like　this！　For　my　part　I　don't　value　it　at　a　pin's　head；　for　I've　found　a　whole　potful　of　them。〃
  When　the　judge　heard　this　he　opened　wide　his　eyes　and　ears；　and　examined　Vardiello　closely；　asking　him　how；　when；　and　where　he　had　found　the　crowns。　And　Vardiello　replied；　〃I　found　them　in　a　palace；　inside　a　dumb　man；　when　it　rained　raisins　and　dried　figs。〃　At　this　the　judge　stared　with　amazement；　but　instantly　seeing　how　the　matter　stood；　he　decreed　that　Vardiello　should　be　sent　to　a　madhouse；　as　the　most　competent　tribunal　for　him。　Thus　the　stupidity　of　the　son　made　the　mother　rich；　and　the　mother's　wit　found　a　remedy　for　the　foolishness　of　the　son：　whereby　it　is　clearly　seen　that
  〃A　ship　when　steered　by　a　skilful　hand　　　　　　Will　seldom　strike　upon　rock　or　sand。〃
  V
  THE　FLEA
  Resolutions　taken　without　thought　bring　disasters　without　remedy。　He　who　behaves　like　a　fool　repents　like　a　wise　man；　as　happened　to　the　King　of　High…Hill；　who　through　unexampled　folly　committed　an　act　of　madness　putting　in　jeopardy　both　his　daughter　and　his　honour。
  Once　upon　a　time　the　King　of　H