第 4 节
作者:吹嘻      更新:2021-02-27 02:37      字数:4857
  put into my hands。          I was appointed also to wash up the dishes; to scour
  the   saucepans;   to   draw   water   from   a   deep   well;   to   carry   each   sister's
  pitcher to its proper place; and to scrub the tables in the refectory。                   From
  these occupations I got on in time to making rope shoes for the sisterhood;
  and to taking care of the great clock of the convent; this last employment
  requiring   me   to   pull   up   three   immensely   heavy   weights   regularly   every
  day。    Seven years of my life passed in this hard work; and I can honestly
  say that I never murmured over it。
  To return; however; to the period of my admission into the convent。
  After   three   months   of   probation;   I   took   the   veil   on   the   twentieth   of
  January; seventeen hundred and twenty…five。                  The Archbishop did me the
  honour to preside at the ceremony; and; in spite of the rigour of the season;
  all Lyons poured into the church to see me take the vows。                      I was deeply
  affected;   but   I   never   faltered   in   my  resolution。    I   pronounced   the   oaths
  with     a  firm   voice;    and   with    a  tranquillity     which    astonished      all  the
  spectators;a tranquillity which has never once failed me since that time。
  Such   is   the   story   of   my   conversion。      Providence   sent   me   into   the
  world     with    an  excellent    nature;    with   a  true   heart;   with   a  remarkable
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  A FAIR PENITENT
  susceptibility      to   the   influence     of  estimable      sentiments。      My      parents
  neglected my education; and left me in the world; destitute of everything
  but youth; beauty; and a lively temperament。                 I tried hard to be virtuous; I
  vowed; before I was out of my teens; and when I happened to be struck
  down by a serious illness; to leave the stage; and to keep my  reputation
  unblemished; if anybody would only give me two hundred livres a year to
  live    upon。    Nobody       came     forward     to  help   me;    and   I  fell。    Heaven
  pardon the rich people of Paris who might have preserved my virtue at so
  small   a   cost!    Heaven   grant   me   courage   to   follow   the   better   path   into
  which   its   mercy  has   led   me;   and   to   persevere  in   a  life  of   penitence   and
  devotion to the end of my days!
  So   this  singular    confession     ends。     Besides     the   little  vanities   and
  levities which appear here and there on its surface; there is surely a strong
  under…current   of   sincerity   and   frankness   which   fit   it   to   appeal   in   some
  degree     to   the  sympathy      as   well   as  the   curiosity    of  the   reader。    It   is
  impossible to read the narrative without feeling that there must have been
  something   really   genuine   and   hearty   in   Mademoiselle   Gautier's   nature;
  and it is a gratifying proof of the honest integrity of her purpose to know
  that she persevered to the last in the life of humility and seclusion which
  her   conscience   had   convinced   her   was   the   best   life   that   she   could   lead。
  Persons who knew her in the Carmelite convent; report that she lived and
  died in it; preserving to the last; all the better part of the youthful liveliness
  of    her  character。     She     always    received     visitors   with    pleasure;    always
  talked to them with surprising cheerfulness; always assisted the poor; and
  always   willingly  wrote   letters   to   her   former   patrons   in   Paris   to   help   the
  interests   of   her   needy   friends。      Towards   the   end   of   her   life;   she   was
  afflicted with blindness; but she was a trouble to no one in consequence of
  this affliction;  for she  continued; in spite  of   it; to   clean her  own   cell;  to
  make   her   own   bed;  and   to   cook   her   own   food   just   as   usual。    One   little
  characteristic vanityharmless enough; surely?remained with her to the
  last。    She   never   forgot   her   own   handsome   face;   which   all。         Paris   had
  admired in the by…gone time; and she contrived to get a dispensation from
  the   Pope   which   allowed   her   to   receive   visitors   in   the   convent   parlour
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  A FAIR PENITENT
  without a veil。
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