groceries　in　which　the　suggestion　of　parched　coffee　prevailed。　　This　is
  the　sharpest　remembrance　of　all；　and　even　to…day　that　odour　affects　me
  somewhat　in　the　manner　that　the　interior　of　a　ship　affects　a　person　prone
  to　seasickness。　　My　Cousin　Robert；　in　his　well…worn　alpaca　coat；　was
  already　seated　at　his　desk　behind　the　clouded　glass　partition　next　the
  alley　at　the　back　of　the　store；　and　as　I　entered　he　gazed　at　me　over　his
  steel…rimmed　spectacles　with　that　same　disturbing　look　of　clairvoyance　I
  have　already　mentioned　as　one　of　his　characteristics。　　The　grey　eyes　were
  quizzical；　and　yet　seemed　to　express　a　little　commiseration。
  〃Well；　Hugh；　you've　decided　to　honour　us；　have　you？〃　he　asked。
  〃I'm　much　obliged　for　giving　me　the　place；　Cousin　Robert；〃　I　replied。
  But　he　had　no　use　for　that　sort　of　politeness；　and　he　saw　through　me；　as
  always。
  〃So　you're　not　too　tony　for　the　grocery　business；　eh？〃
  〃Oh；　no；　sir。〃
  〃It　was　good　enough　for　old　Benjamin　Breck；〃　he　said。　　〃Well；　I'll　give
  you　a　fair　trial；　my　boy；　and　no　favouritism　on　account　of　relationship；
  any　more　than　to　Willie。〃
  His　strong　voice　resounded　through　the　store；　and　presently　my　cousin
  Willie　appeared　in　answer　to　his　summons；　the　same　Willie　who　used　to
  lead　me；　on　mischief　bent；　through　the　barns　and　woods　and　fields　of
  Claremore。　　He　was　barefoot　no　longer；　though　freckled　still；　grown　lanky
  and　tall；　he　wore　a　coarse　blue　apron　that　fell　below　his　knees；　and　a
  pencil　was　stuck　behind　his　ear。
  〃Get　an　apron　for　Hugh；〃　said　his　father。
  Willie's　grin　grew　wider。
  〃I'll　fit　him　out；〃　he　said。
  〃Start　him　in　the　shipping　department；〃　directed　Cousin　Robert；　and
  turned　to　his　letters。
  I　was　forthwith　provided　with　an　apron；　and　introduced　to　the　slim　and
  anaemic　but　cheerful　Johnny　Hedges；　the　shipping　clerk；　hard　at　work　in
  the　alley。　　Secretly　I　looked　down　on　my　fellow…clerks；　as　one　destined
  for　a　higher　mission；　made　out　of　better　stuff；finer　stuff。　　Despite　my
  attempt　to　hide　this　sense　of　superiority　they　were　swift　to　discover　it；
  and　perhaps　it　is　to　my　credit　as　well　as　theirs　that　they　did　not　resent
  it。　　Curiously　enough；　they　seemed　to　acknowledge　it。　　Before　the　week
  was　out　I　had　earned　the　nickname　of　Beau　Brummel。
  〃Say；　Beau；〃　Johnny　Hedges　would　ask；　when　I　appeared　of　a　morning；　〃what
  happened　in　the　great　world　last　night？〃
  I　had　an　affection　for　them；　these　fellow…clerks；　and　I　often　wondered　at
  their　contentment　with　the　drab　lives　they　led；　at　their　self…
  congratulation　for　〃having　a　job〃　at　Breck　and　Company's。
  〃You　don't　mean　to　say　you　like　this　kind　of　work？〃　I　exclaimed　one　day
  to　Johnny　Hedges；　as　we　sat　on　barrels　of　XXXX　flour　looking　out　at　the
  hot　sunlight　in　the　alley。
  〃It　ain't　a　question　of　liking　it；　Beau；〃　he　rebuked　me。　　〃It's　all　very
  well　for　you　to　talk；　since　your　father's　a　millionaire〃　（a　fiction　so
  firmly　embedded　in　their　heads　that　no　amount　of　denial　affected　it）；
  〃but　what　do　you　think　would　happen　to　me　if　I　was　fired？　　I　couldn't　go
  home　and　take　it　easyyou　bet　not。　　I　just　want　to　shake　hands　with
  myself　when　I　think　that　I've　got　a　home；　and　a　job　like　this。　　I　know　a
  fellera　hard　worker　he　was；　too　who　walked　the　pavements　for　three
  months　when　the　Colvers　failed；　and　couldn't　get　nothing；　and　took　to
  drink；　and　the　last　I　heard　of　him　he　was　sleeping　in　police　stations　and
  walking　the　ties；　and　his　wife's　a　waitress　at　a　cheap　hotel。　　Don't　you
  think　it's　easy　to　get　a　job。〃
  I　was　momentarily　sobered　by　the　earnestness　with　which　he　brought　home
  to　me　the　relentlessness　of　our　civilization。　　It　seemed　incredible。　　I
  should　have　learned　a　lesson　in　that　store。　　Barring　a　few　discordant
  days　when　the　orders　came　in　too　fast　or　when　we　were　short　handed
  because　of　sickness；　it　was　a　veritable　hive　of　happiness；　morning　after
  morning　clerks　and　porters　arrived；　pale；　yet　smiling；　and　laboured　with
  cheerfulness　from　eight　o'clock　until　six；　and　departed　as　cheerfully　for
  modest　homes　in　obscure　neighbourhoods　that　seemed　to　me　areas　of　exile。
  They　were　troubled　with　no　visions　of　better　things。　　When　the　travelling
  men　came　in　from　the　〃road〃　there　was　great　hilarity。　　Important
  personages；　these；　looked　up　to　by　the　city　clerks；　jolly；　reckless；
  Elizabethan…like　rovers；　who　had　tasted　of　the　wine　of　libertyand　of
  other　wines　with　the　ineradicable　lust　for　the　road　in　their　blood。　　No
  more　routine　for　Jimmy　Bowles；　who　was　king　of　them　all。　　I　shudder　to
  think　how　much　of　my　knowledge　of　life　I　owe　to　this　Jimmy；　whose　stories
  would　have　filled　a　quarto　volume；　but　could　on　no　account　have　been
  published；　for　a　self…respecting　post…office　would　not　have　allowed　them
  to　pass　through　the　mails。　　As　it　was；　Jimmy　gave　them　circulation
  enough。　　I　can　still　see　his　round　face；　with　the　nose　just　indicated；
  his　wicked；　twinkling　little　eyes；　and　I　can　hear　his　husky　voice　fall　to
  a　whisper　when　〃the　boss〃　passed　through　the　store。　　Jimmy；　when　visiting
  us；　always　had　a　group　around　him。　　His　audacity　with　women　amazed　me；
  for　he　never　passed　one　of　the　〃lady　clerks〃　without　some　form　of　caress；
  which　they　resented　but　invariably　laughed　at。　　One　day　he　imparted　to　me
  his　code　of　morality：　he　never　made　love　to　another　man's　wife；　so　he
  assured　me；　if　he　knew　the　man！　　The　secret　of　life　he　had　discovered　in
  laughter；　and　by　laughter　he　sold　quantities　of　Cousin　Robert's
  groceries。
  Mr。　Bowles　boasted　of　a　catholic　acquaintance　in　all　the　cities　of　his
  district；　but　before　venturing　forth　to　conquer　these　he　had　learned　his
  own　city　by　heart。　　My　Cousin　Robert　was　not　aware　of　the　fact　that　Mr。
  Bowles　〃showed〃　the　town　to　certain　customers。　　He　even　desired　to　show
  it　to　me；　but　an　epicurean　strain　in　my　nature　held　me　back。　　Johnny
  Hedges　went　with　him　occasionally；　and　Henry　Schneider；　the　bill　clerk；
  and　I　listened　eagerly　to　their　experiences；　afterwards　confiding　them　to
  Tom。。。。
  There　were　times　when；　driven　by　an　overwhelming　curiosity；　I　ventured
  into　certain　strange　streets；　alone；　shivering　with　cold　and　excitement；
  gripped　by　a　fascination　I　did　not　comprehend；　my　eyes　now　averted；　now
  irresistibly　raised　toward　the　white　streaks　of　light　that　outlined　the
  windows　of　dark　houses。。。。
  One　winter　evening　as　I　was　going　home；　I　encountered　at　the　mail…box　a
  young　woman　who　shot　at　me　a　queer；　twisted　smile。　　I　stood　still；　as
  though　stunned；　looking　after　her；　and　when　halfway　across　the　slushy
  street　she　turned　and　smiled　again。　　Prodigiously　excited；　I　followed
  her；　fearful　that　I　might　be　seen　by　someone　who　knew　me；　nor　was　it
  until　she　reached　an　unfamiliar　street　that　I　ventured　to　overtake　her。
  She　confounded　me　by　facing　me。
  〃Get　out！〃　she　cried　fiercely。
  I　halted　in　my　tracks；　overwhelmed　with　shame。　　But　she　continued　to
  regard　me　by　the　light　of　the　street　lamp。
  〃You　didn't　want　to　be　seen　with　me　on　Second　Street；　did　you？　　You're
  one　of　those　sneaking　swells。〃
  The　shock　of　this　sudden　onslaught　was　tremendous。　　I　stood　frozen　to　the
  spot；　trembling；　convicted；　for　I　knew　that　her　accusation　was　just；　I
  had　wounded　her；　and　I　had　a　desire　to　make　amends。
  〃I'm　sorry；〃　I　faltered。　　〃I　didn't　meanto　offend　you。　　And　you　smiled〃
  I　got　no　farther。　　She　began　to　laugh；　and　so　loudly　that　I　glanced
  anxiously　about。　　I　would　have　fled；　but　something　still　held　me；
  something　that　belied　the　harshness　of　her　laugh。
  〃You're　just　a　kid；〃　she　told　me。　　〃Say；　you　get　along　home；　and　tell
  your　mamma　I　sent　you。〃
  Whereupon　I　departed　in　a　state　of　humiliation　and　self…reproach　I　had
  never　before　known；　wandering　about　aimlessly　for　a　long　time。　　When　at
  length　I　arrived　at　home；　late　for　supper；　my　mother's　solicitude　only
  served　to　deepen　my　pain。　　She　went　to　the　kitchen　herself　to　see　if　my
  mince…pie　were　hot；　and　served　me　with　her　own　hands。　　My　father　remained
  at　his　place　at　the　head　of　the　table　while　I　tried　to　eat；　smiling
  indulgently　at　her　ministrations。
  〃Oh；　a　little　hard　work　won't　hurt　him；　Sarah；〃　he　said。　　〃When　I　was　his
  age　I　often　worked　until　eleven　o'clock　and　never　felt　the　worse　for　it。
  Business　must　be　pretty　good；　eh；　Hugh？〃
  I　had　never　seen　him　in　a　more　relaxing　mood；　a　more　approving　one。　　My
  mother　sat　down　beside　me。。。。　　Words　seem　useless　to　express　the
  complicated　nature　of　my　suffering　at　that　moment；my　remorse；　my　sense
  of　deception；　of　hypocrisy；yes；　and　my　terror。　　I　tried　to　talk
  naturally；　to　answer　my　father's　questions　about　affairs　at　the　store；
  while　all　the　time　my　eyes　rested　upon　the　objects　of　the　room；　familiar
  since　childhood。　　Here　were　warmth；　love；　and　safety。　　Why　could　I　not　be
  content　with　them；　thankful　for　them？　　What　was　it　in　me　that　drove　me
  from　these　sheltering　walls　out　into　the　dark　places？　　I　glanced　at　my
  father。　　Had　he　ever　known　these　wild；　destroying　desires？　　Oh；　if　I　only
  could　have　confided　in　him！　　The　very　idea　of　it　was　preposterous。　　Such
  placidity　as　theirs　would　never　understand　the　nature　of　my　temptations；
  and　I　pictured　to　myself　their　horror　and　despair　at　my　revelation。　　In
  imagination　I　beheld　their　figures　receding　while　I　drifted　out　to　sea；
  alone。　　Would　th