第 15 节
作者:猫王      更新:2021-02-27 00:39      字数:9250
  was   difficult   to   imagine   him   in   those   surroundings。     I   thought   it   could
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  hardly have failed to strike them that there was something incongruous in
  him。
  〃But if he wanted to be an artist; why didn't he say so?〃 asked Mrs。
  Strickland   at   last。   〃I   should   have   thought   I   was   the   last   person   to   be
  unsympathetic to  to aspirations of that kind。〃
  Mrs。   MacAndrew   tightened   her   lips。        I   imagine   that   she   had   never
  looked      with   approval     on   her   sister's   leaning    towards     persons     who
  cultivated the arts。      She spoke of 〃culchaw〃 derisively。
  Mrs。 Strickland continued:
  〃After all; if he had any talent I should be the first to encourage it。                I
  wouldn't have minded sacrifices。            I'd much rather be married to a painter
  than   to   a   stockbroker。    If   it   weren't   for   the   children;   I   wouldn't   mind
  anything。      I could be just as happy in a shabby studio in Chelsea as in this
  flat。〃
  〃My dear; I have no patience with you;〃 cried Mrs。 MacAndrew。 〃You
  don't mean to say you believe a word of this nonsense?〃
  〃But I think it's true;〃 I put in mildly。
  She looked at me with good…humoured contempt。
  〃A man doesn't throw up his business and leave his wife and children
  at   the   age   of   forty  to   become   a   painter   unless   there's   a   woman   in   it。 I
  suppose he met one of your  artistic friends; and she's turned his head。〃
  A spot of colour rose suddenly to Mrs。 Strickland's pale cheeks。
  〃What is she like?〃
  I hesitated a little。    I knew that I had a bombshell。
  〃There isn't a woman。〃
  Colonel   MacAndrew   and   his   wife   uttered   expressions   of   incredulity;
  and Mrs。 Strickland sprang to her feet。
  〃Do you mean to say you never saw her?〃
  〃There's no one to see。        He's quite alone。〃
  〃That's preposterous;〃 cried Mrs。 MacAndrew。
  〃I knew I ought to have gone over myself;〃 said the Colonel。 〃You can
  bet your boots I'd have routed her out fast enough。〃
  〃I   wish   you   had   gone   over;〃   I   replied;  somewhat   tartly。   〃You'd   have
  seen that every one of your suppositions was wrong。 He's not at a smart
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  hotel。    He's living in one tiny room in the most squalid way。               If he's left
  his home; it's not to live a gay life。       He's got hardly any money。〃
  〃Do you think he's done something that we don't know about; and is
  lying doggo on account of the police?〃
  The suggestion sent a ray of hope in all their breasts; but I would have
  nothing to do with it。
  〃If that were so; he would hardly have been such a fool as to give his
  partner   his   address;〃   I   retorted   acidly。   〃Anyhow;   there's   one   thing   I'm
  positive of; he didn't go away with anyone。            He's not in love。      Nothing is
  farther from his thoughts。〃
  There was a pause while they reflected over my words。
  〃Well; if what you say is true;〃 said Mrs。 MacAndrew at last; 〃things
  aren't so bad as I thought。〃
  Mrs。 Strickland glanced at her; but said nothing。
  She was very pale now; and her   fine brow was dark and lowering。  I
  could     not   understand     the  expression     of   her   face。  Mrs。    MacAndrew
  continued:
  〃If it's just a whim; he'll get over it。〃
  〃Why don't you go over to him; Amy?〃 hazarded the Colonel。 〃There's
  no reason why you shouldn't live with him in Paris for a year。                We'll look
  after   the   children。   I   dare   say   he'd   got   stale。 Sooner   or   later   he'll   be
  quite   ready  to   come   back   to   London;  and   no great   harm  will   have   been
  done。〃
  〃I wouldn't do that;〃 said Mrs。 MacAndrew。              〃I'd give him all the rope
  he wants。      He'll come back with his tail between his legs and settle down
  again quite comfortably。〃          Mrs。  MacAndrew looked at   her sister  coolly。
  〃Perhaps   you   weren't   very   wise   with   him   sometimes。        Men   are   queer
  creatures; and one has to know how to manage them。〃
  Mrs。 MacAndrew shared the common opinion of her sex that a man is
  always a brute to leave a woman who is attached to him; but that a woman
  is much to blame if he does。
  Mrs。 Strickland looked slowly from one to another of us。
  〃He'll never come back;〃 she said。
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  〃Oh;   my   dear;   remember   what   we've   just   heard。      He's   been   used   to
  comfort   and   to   having   someone   to   look   after   him。     How   long   do   you
  think it'll   be   before   he gets   tired   of   a   scrubby  room  in   a   scrubby  hotel?
  Besides; he hasn't any money。           He must come back。〃
  〃As long as I thought he'd run away with some woman I thought there
  was a chance。        I don't believe that sort of thing ever answers。 He'd have
  got sick to death of her in three months。 But if he hasn't gone because he's
  in love; then it's finished。〃
  〃Oh;  I  think   that's   awfully  subtle;〃   said   the  Colonel; putting into   the
  word all the contempt he felt for a quality so alien to the traditions of his
  calling。    〃Don't you believe it。 He'll come back; and; as Dorothy says; I
  dare say he'll be none the worse for having had a bit of a fling。〃
  〃But I don't want him back;〃 she said。
  〃Amy!〃
  It   was   anger   that   had   seized   Mrs。  Strickland;   and   her pallor   was   the
  pallor   of   a   cold   and   sudden   rage。  She   spoke   quickly   now;   with   little
  gasps。
  〃I   could    have   forgiven    it  if  he'd  fallen   desperately     in  love   with
  someone   and   gone   off   with   her。    I  should   have   thought   that   natural。    I
  shouldn't   really   have   blamed   him。       I   should   have   thought   he   was   led
  away。     Men are   so weak;   and   women are   so unscrupulous。               But   this is
  different。     I hate him。 I'll never forgive him now。〃
  Colonel MacAndrew and his wife began to talk to her together。 They
  were     astonished。      They      told   her   she   was    mad。     They      could    not
  understand。      Mrs。 Strickland turned desperately to me。
  〃Don't  see?〃 she cried。
  〃I'm not sure。      Do you mean that you could have forgiven him if he'd
  left you for a woman; but not if he's left you for an idea? You think you're
  a match for the one; but against the other you're helpless?〃
  Mrs。 Strickland gave mt a look in which I read no great friendliness;
  but did not answer。        Perhaps I had struck home。 She went on in a low and
  trembling voice:
  〃I never knew it was possible to hate anyone as much as I hate him。
  Do you know; I've been comforting myself by thinking that however long
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  it lasted he'd want me at the end?           I knew when he was dying he'd send
  for me; and I was ready to go; I'd have nursed him like a mother; and at the
  last   I'd   have   told   him   that   it   didn't   matter;   I'd   loved   him   always;   and   I
  forgave him everything。〃
  I have always been a little disconcerted by the passion women have for
  behaving   beautifully   at   the   death…bed   of   those   they   love。   Sometimes   it
  seems as if they grudge the longevity which postpones their chance of an
  effective scene。
  〃But now  now it's finished。          I'm as indifferent to him as if he were
  a stranger。     I should like him to die miserable; poor; and starving; without
  a friend。     I hope he'll rot with some loathsome disease。               I've done with
  him。〃
  I thought it as well then to say what Strickland had suggested。
  〃If   you   want   to   divorce   him;   he's   quite   willing   to   do   whatever   is
  necessary to make it possible。〃
  〃Why should I give him his freedom?〃
  〃I   don't  think   he   wants   it。  He    merely   thought     it  might   be   more
  convenient to you。〃
  Mrs。 Strickland shrugged her shoulders impatiently。                 I think I was a
  little disappointed in her。        I expected then people to be more of a piece
  than I do now; and I was distressed to find so much vindictiveness in so
  charming a creature。