〃The　FOREMAN？〃　asked　Isabel　in　a　tone　of　surprise。
  〃Yes；　the　foreman　of　the　shop　where　I　work。〃
  〃ForemanshopWORK！　　What！　do　YOU　work。〃
  〃Aye；　Miss　Sawtelle！　　I　am　a　cooper！〃　and　his　eyes　flashed　with
  honest　pride。
  〃What's　that？〃　she　asked；　〃it　is　something　about　barrels；　isn't
  it！〃
  〃It　is！〃　he　said；　with　a　flashing　nostril。　　〃And　hogsheads。〃
  〃Then　go！〃　she　said　in　a　tone　of　disdain〃go　AWAY！〃
  〃Ha！〃　he　cried；　〃you　spurn　me；　then；　because　I　am　a　mechanic。
  Well；　be　it　so！　though　the　time　will　come；　Isabel　Sawtelle；〃　he
  added；　and　nothing　could　exceed　his　looks　at　this　moment〃when
  you　will　bitterly　remember　the　cooper　you　now　so　cruelly　cast
  off？　　FAREWELL！〃
  。　　　　　。　　　　　　。　　　　　　。
  Years　rolled　on。　　Isabel　Sawtelle　married　a　miserable　aristocrat；
  who　recently　died　of　delirium　tremens。　　Her　father　failed；　and　is
  now　a　raving　maniac；　and　wants　to　bite　little　children。　　All　her
  brothers　（except　one）　were　sent　to　the　penitentiary　for　burglary；
  and　her　mother　peddles　clams　that　are　stolen　for　her　by　little
  George；　her　only　son　that　has　his　freedom。　　Isabel's　sister
  Bianca　rides　an　immoral　spotted　horse　in　the　circus；　HER　husband
  having　long　since　been　hanged　for　murdering　his　own　uncle　on　his
  mother's　side。　　Thus　we　see　that　it　is　always　best　to　marry　a
  mechanic。
  3。6。　　ROBERTO　THE　ROVER：A　TALE　OF　SEA　AND　SHORE。
  CHAPTER　I。FRANCE。
  Our　story　opens　in　the　early　part　of　the　year　17。　　France　was
  rocking　wildly　from　centre　to　circumference。　　The　arch　despot　and
  unscrupulous　man；　Richard　the　III。；　was　trembling　like　an　aspen
  leaf　upon　his　throne。　　He　had　been　successful；　through　the
  valuable　aid　of　Richelieu　and　Sir。　Wm。　Donn；　in　destroying　the
  Orleans　Dysentery；　but　still　he　trembled？　　O'Mulligan；　the
  snake…eater　of　Ireland；　and　Schnappsgoot　of　Holland；　a　retired
  dealer　in　gin　and　sardines；　had　united　their　forcessome　nineteen
  men　and　a　brace　of　bull　pups　in　alland　were　overtly　at　work；
  their　object　being　to　oust　the　tyrant。　　O'Mulligan　was　a　young　man
  between　fifty…three　years　of　age　and　was　chiefly　distinguished
  for　being　the　son　of　his　aunt　on　his　great　grandfather's　side。
  Schnappsgoot　was　a　man　of　liberal　education；　having　passed　three
  weeks　at　Oberlin　College。　　He　was　a　man　of　great　hardihood；　also；
  and　would　frequently　read　an　entire　column　of　〃railway　matters〃
  in　the　〃Cleveland　Herald〃　without　shrieking　with　agony。
  CHAPTER　II。THE　KING。
  The　tyrant　Richard　the　III。　（late　Mr。　Gloster）　sat　upon　his
  throne　in　the　Palace　d'　St。　Cloud。　　He　was　dressed　in　his　best
  clothes；　and　gorgeous　trappings　surrounded　him　everywhere。
  Courtiers；　in　glittering　and　golden　armor；　stood　ready　at　his
  beck。　　He　sat　moodily　for　a　while；　when　suddenly　his　sword
  flashed　from　its　silver　scabbard；　and　he　shouted
  〃Slaves；　some　wine；　ho！〃
  The　words　had　scarcely　escaped　his　lips　ere　a　bucket　of　champagne
  and　a　hoe　were　placed　before　him。
  As　the　king　raised　the　bucket　to　his　lips；　a　deep　voice　near　by；
  proceeding　from　the　mouth　of　the　noble　Count　Staghisnibs；　cried
  〃Drink　hearty；　old　feller。〃
  〃Reports　traveling　on　lightning…wings；　whisper　of　strange　goings
  on　and　cuttings　up　throughout　this　kingdom。　　Knowest　thou　aught
  of　these　things；　most　noble　Hellitysplit？〃　and　the　king　drew　from
  the　upper　pocket　of　his　gold…faced　vest　a　paper　of　John
  Anderson's　solace　and　proceeded　to　take　a　chaw。
  〃Treason　stalks　monster…like　throughout　unhappy　France；　my
  liege！〃　said　the　noble　Hellitysplit。　　〃The　ranks　of　the　P。Q。R。's
  are　daily　swelling；　and　the　G。R。J。A。's　are　constantly　on　the
  increase。　　Already　the　peasantry　scout　at　cat…fish；　and　demand
  pickled　salmon　for　their　noonday　repasts。　　But；　my　liege；〃　and
  the　brave　Hellitysplit　eyes　flashed　fire；　〃myself　and　sword　are
  at　thy　command？〃
  〃Bully　for　you；　Count；〃　said　the　king。　　〃But　soft：　　methinks
  reportperchance　unjustlyhast　spoken　suspiciously　of　thee；
  most　Royal　d'Sardine？　How　is　this？　　Is　it　a　newspaper　yarn？
  WHAT'S　UP？〃
  D'Sardine　meekly　approached　the　throne；　knelt　at　the　king's　feet；
  and　said：　　〃Most　patient；　gray；　and　red…headed　skinner；　my　very
  approved　skin…plaster：　　that　I've　been　asked　to　drink　by　the
  P。Q。R。's；　it　is　most　true；　true　I　have　imbibed　sundry　mugs　of
  lager　with　them。　　The　very　head　and　front　of　my　offending　hath
  this　extent；　no　more。〃
  〃'Tis　well！〃　said　the　King；　rising　and　looking　fiercely　around。
  〃Hadst　thou　proved　false　I　would　with　my　own　good　sword　have　cut
  off　yer　head；　and　spilled　your　ber…lud　all　over　the　floor！　　If　I
  wouldn't；　blow　me！〃
  CHAPTER　III。THE　ROVER。
  Thrilling　as　the　scenes　depicted　in　the　preceding　chapter
  indubitably　were；　those　of　this　are　decidedly　THRILLINGER。
  Again　are　we　in　the　mighty　presence　of　the　King；　and　again　is
  he　surrounded　by　splendour　and　gorgeously…mailed　courtiers。　　A
  sea…faring　man　stands　before　him。　　It　is　Roberto　the　Rover；
  disguised　as　a　common　sailor。
  〃So；〃　said　the　King；　〃thou　wouldst　have　audience　with　me！〃
  〃Aye　aye；　yer　'onor；〃　said　the　sailor；　〃just　tip　us　yer　grapplin
  irons　and　pipe　all　hands　on　deck。　　Reef　home　yer　jib　poop　and
  splice　yer　main　topsuls。　　Man　the　jibboom　and　let　fly　yer
  top…gallunts。　　I've　seen　some　salt　water　in　my　days；　yer　land
  lubber；　but　shiver　my　timbers　if　I　hadn't　rather　coast　among
  seagulls　than　landsharks。　　My　name　is　Sweet　William。　　You're　old
  Dick　the　Three。　　Ahoy！　　Awast！　　Dam　my　eyes！〃　and　Sweet　William
  pawed　the　marble　floor　and　swung　his　tarpaulin　after　the　manner
  of　sailors　on　the　stage；　and　consequently　not　a　bit　like　those
  on　shipboard。
  〃Mariner；〃　said　the　King；　gravely；　〃thy　language　is　exceeding
  lucid；　and　leads　me　to　infer　that　things　is　workin'　bad。〃
  〃Aye；　aye；　my　hearty！〃　yelled　Sweet　William；　in　dulcet　strains；
  reminding　the　King　of　the　〃voluptuous　smell　of　physic；〃　spoken
  of　by　the　late　Mr。　Byron。
  〃What　wouldst　thou；　seafaring　man？〃　asked　the　King。
  〃This！〃　cried　the　Rover；　suddenly　taking　off　his　maritime
  clothing　and　putting　on　an　expensive　suit　of　silk；　bespangled
  with　diamonds。　　〃This！　　I　am　Roberto　the　Rover！〃
  The　King　was　thunder…struck。　　Cowering　back　in　his　chair　of
  state；　he　said　in　a　tone　of　mingled　fear　and　amazement；　〃Well；
  may　I　be　gaul…darned！〃
  〃Ber…lud！　　Ber…lud！　　Ber…lud！〃　shrieked　the　Rover；　as　he　drew　a
  horse…pistol　and　fired　it　at　the　King；　who　fell　fatally　killed；
  his　last　words　being；　〃WE　ARE　GOVENRED　TOO　MUCHTHIS　IS　THE　LAST
  OF　EARTH！！！〃　　At　this　exciting　juncture　Messrs。　O'Mulligan　and
  Schnappsgoot　（who　had　previously　entered　into　a　copartnership
  with　the　Rover　for　the　purpose　of　doing　a　general　killing
  business）　burst　into　the　room　and　cut　off　the　heads　and　let　out
  the　inwards　of　all　the　noblemen　they　encountered。　　They　then
  killed　themselves　and　died　like　heroes；　wrapped　up　in　the　Star
  Spangled　Banner；　to　slow　music。
  FINALE。
  The　Rover　fled。　　He　was　captured　near　Marseilles　and　thrust　into
  prison；　where　he　lay　for　sixteen　weary　years；　all　attempts　to
  escape　being　futile。　One　night　a　lucky　thought　struck　him。　　He
  raised　the　window　and　got　out。　　But　he　was　unhappy。　　Remorse　and
  dyspepsia　preyed　upon　his　vitals。　　He　tried　Boerhave's　Holland
  Bitters　and　the　Retired　Physician's　Sands　of　Life；　and　got　well。
  He　then　married　the　lovely　Countess　D'Smith；　and　lived　to　a　green
  old　age；　being　the　triumph　of　virtue　and　downfall　of　vice。
  3。7。　　RED　HAND：　　A　TALE　OF　REVENGE。
  CHAPTER　I。
  〃Life's　but　a　walking　shadowa　poor　player。〃Shakespeare。
  〃Let　me　die　to　sweet　music。〃J。W。　Shuckers。
  〃Go　forth；　Clarence　Stanley！　　Hence　to　the　bleak　world；　dog！　　You
  have　repaid　my　generosity　with　the　blackest　ingratitude。　　You
  have　forged　my　name　on　a　five　thousand　dollar　checkhave
  repeatedly　robbed　my　money　drawerhave　perpetrated　a　long　series
  of　high…handed　villanies；　and　now　to…night；　because；　forsooth；
  I'll　not　give　you　more　money　to　spend　on　your　dissolute
  companions；　you　break　a　chair　over　my　aged　head。　　Anyway！　　You
  are　a　young　man　of　small　moral　principle。　　Don't　ever　speak　to　me
  again！〃
  These　harsh　words　fell　from　the　lips　of　Horace　Blinker；　one　of
  the　merchant　princes　of　New　York　City。　　He　spoke　to　Clarence
  Stanley；　his　adopted　son　and　a　beautiful　youth　of　nineteen
  summers。　　In　vain　did　Clarence　plead　his　poverty；　his　tender　age；
  his　inexperience；　in　vain　did　he　fasten　those　lustrous　blue　eyes
  of　his　appealingly　and　tearfully　upon　Mr。　Blinker；　and　tell　him
  he　would　make　the　pecuniary　matter　all　right　in　the　fall；　and
  that　he　merely　shattered　a　chair　over　his　head　by　way　of　a　joke。
  The　stony…hearted　man　was　remorseless；　and　that　night　Clarence
  Stanly　became　a　wanderer　in　the　wide；　wide　world。　　As　he　went
  forth　he　uttered　these　words：　　〃H。　Blinker；　beware！　　A　RED　HAND
  is　around；　my　fine　feller！〃
  CHAPTER。　　II。
  〃a　man　of　strange　wild　mienone　who　has　seen　trouble。〃Sir
  Walter　Scott。
  〃You　ask　me；　don't　I　wish　to　see　the　Constitution　dissolved　and
  broken　up。　I　answer；　NEVER；　NEVER；　NEVER！〃H。W。　Faxon。
  〃They　will　join　our　expedition。〃Anon。
  〃Go　in　on　your　muscle。〃President　Buchanan's　instructions　to　the
  Collector　of　Toledo。
  〃Westw