第 2 节
作者:老山文学      更新:2021-02-25 00:24      字数:9321
  family; and that peradventure you buy too dear。
  I came late to the government of a house: they whom nature sent into the
  world before me long eased me of that trouble; so that I had already
  taken another bent more suitable to my humour。  Yet; for so much as I
  have seen; 'tis an employment more troublesome than hard; whoever is
  capable of anything else; will easily do this。  Had I a mind to be rich;
  that way would seem too long; I had served my kings; a more profitable
  traffic than any other。  Since I pretend to nothing but the reputation of
  having got nothing or dissipated nothing; conformably to the rest of my
  life; improper either to do good or ill of any moment; and that I only
  desire to pass on; I can do it; thanks be to God; without any great
  endeavour。  At the worst; evermore prevent poverty by lessening your
  expense; 'tis that which I make my great concern; and doubt not but to do
  it before I shall be compelled。  As to the rest; I have sufficiently
  settled my thoughts to live upon less than I have; and live contentedly:
  〃Non aestimatione census; verum victu atque cultu;
  terminantur pecunix modus。〃
  '〃'Tis not by the value of possessions; but by our daily subsistence
  and tillage; that our riches are truly estimated。〃
  Cicero; Paradox; vi。 3。'
  My real need does not so wholly take up all I have; that Fortune has not
  whereon to fasten her teeth without biting to the quick。  My presence;
  heedless and ignorant as it is; does me great service in my domestic
  affairs; I employ myself in them; but it goes against the hair; finding
  that I have this in my house; that though I burn my candle at one end by
  myself; the other is not spared。
  Journeys do me no harm but only by their expense; which is great; and
  more than I am well able to bear; being always wont to travel with not
  only a necessary; but a handsome equipage; I must make them so much
  shorter and fewer; I spend therein but the froth; and what I have
  reserved for such uses; delaying and deferring my motion till that be
  ready。  I will not that the pleasure of going abroad spoil the pleasure
  of being retired at home; on the contrary; I intend they shall nourish
  and favour one another。  Fortune has assisted me in this; that since my
  principal profession in this life was to live at ease; and rather idly
  than busily; she has deprived me of the necessity of growing rich to
  provide for the multitude of my heirs。  If there be not enough for one;
  of that whereof I had so plentifully enough; at his peril be it: his
  imprudence will not deserve that I should wish him any more。  And every
  one; according to the example of Phocion; provides sufficiently for his
  children who so provides for them as to leave them as much as was left
  him。  I should by no means like Crates' way。  He left his money in the
  hands of a banker with this conditionthat if his children were fools;
  he should then give it to them; if wise; he should then distribute it to
  the most foolish of the people; as if fools; for being less capable of
  living without riches; were more capable of using them。
  At all events; the damage occasioned by my absence seems not to deserve;
  so long as I am able to support it; that I should waive the occasions of
  diverting myself by that troublesome assistance。
  There is always something that goes amiss。  The affairs; one while of one
  house; and then of another; tear you to pieces; you pry into everything
  too near; your perspicacity hurts you here; as well as in other things。
  I steal away from occasions of vexing myself; and turn from the knowledge
  of things that go amiss; and yet I cannot so order it; but that every
  hour I jostle against something or other that displeases me; and the
  tricks that they most conceal from me; are those that I the soonest come
  to know; some there are that; not to make matters worse; a man must
  himself help to conceal。  Vain vexations; vain sometimes; but always
  vexations。  The smallest and slightest impediments are the most piercing:
  and as little letters most tire the eyes; so do little affairs most
  disturb us。  The rout of little ills more offend than one; how great
  soever。  By how much domestic thorns are numerous and slight; by so much
  they prick deeper and without warning; easily surprising us when least we
  suspect them。
  'Now Homer shews us clearly enough how surprise gives the advantage;
  who represents Ulysses weeping at the death of his dog; and not
  weeping at the tears of his mother; the first accident; trivial as
  it was; got the better of him; coming upon him quite unexpectedly;
  he sustained the second; though more potent; because he was prepared
  for it。  'Tis light occasions that humble our lives。 '
  I am no philosopher; evils oppress me according to their weight; and they
  weigh as much according to the form as the matter; and very often more。
  If I have therein more perspicacity than the vulgar; I have also more
  patience; in short; they weigh with me; if they do not hurt me。  Life is
  a tender thing; and easily molested。  Since my age has made me grow more
  pensive and morose;
  〃Nemo enim resistit sibi; cum caeperit impelli;〃
  '〃For no man resists himself when he has begun to be driven
  forward。〃Seneca; Ep。; 13。'
  for the most trivial cause imaginable; I irritate that humour; which
  afterwards nourishes and exasperates itself of its own motion; attracting
  and heaping up matter upon matter whereon to feed:
  〃Stillicidi casus lapidem cavat:〃
  '〃The ever falling drop hollows out a stone。〃Lucretius; i。 314。'
  these continual tricklings consume and ulcerate me。  Ordinary
  inconveniences are never light; they are continual and inseparable;
  especially when they spring from the members of a family; continual and
  inseparable。  When I consider my affairs at distance and in gross; I
  find; because perhaps my memory is none of the best; that they have gone
  on hitherto improving beyond my reason or expectation; my revenue seems
  greater than it is; its prosperity betrays me: but when I pry more
  narrowly into the business; and see how all things go:
  〃Tum vero in curas animum diducimus omnes;〃
  '〃Indeed we lead the mind into all sorts of cares。〃
  AEneid; v。 720。'
  I have a thousand things to desire and to fear。  To give them quite over;
  is very easy for me to do: but to look after them without trouble; is
  very hard。  'Tis a miserable thing to be in a place where everything you
  see employs and concerns you; and I fancy that I more cheerfully enjoy
  the pleasures of another man's house; and with greater and a purer
  relish; than those of my own。  Diogenes answered according to my humour
  him who asked him what sort of wine he liked the best: 〃That of another;〃
  said he。 'Diogenes Laertius; vi。 54。'
  My father took a delight in building at Montaigne; where he was born; and
  in all the government of domestic affairs I love to follow his example
  and rules; and I shall engage those who are to succeed me; as much as in
  me lies; to do the same。  Could I do better for him; I would; and am
  proud that his will is still performing and acting by me。  God forbid
  that in my hands I should ever suffer any image of life; that I am able
  to render to so good a father; to fail。  And wherever I have taken in
  hand to strengthen some old foundations of walls; and to repair some
  ruinous buildings; in earnest I have done it more out of respect to his
  design; than my own satisfaction; and am angry at myself that I have not
  proceeded further to finish the beginnings he left in his house; and so
  much the more because I am very likely to be the last possessor of my
  race; and to give the last hand to it。  For; as to my own particular
  application; neither the pleasure of building; which they say is so
  bewitching; nor hunting; nor gardens; nor the other pleasures of a
  retired life; can much amuse me。  And 'tis what I am angry at myself for;
  as I am for all other opinions that are incommodious to me; which I would
  not so much care to have vigorous and learned; as I would have them easy
  and convenient for life; they are true and sound enough; if they are
  useful and pleasing。  Such as hear me declare my ignorance in husbandry;
  whisper in my ear that it is disdain; and that I neglect to know its
  instruments; its seasons; its order; how they dress my vines; how they
  graft; and to know the names and forms of herbs and fruits; and the
  preparing the meat on which I live; the names and prices of the stuffs I
  wear; because; say they; I have set my heart upon some higher knowledge;
  they kill me in saying so。  It is not disdain; it is folly; and rather
  stupidity than glory; I had rather be a good horseman than a good
  logician:
  〃Quin to aliquid saltem potius; quorum indiget usus;
  Viminibus mollique paras detexere junco。〃
  '〃'Dost thou not rather do something which is required; and make
  osier and reed basket。〃Virgil; Eclog。; ii。 71。'
  We occupy our thoughts about the general; and about universal causes and
  conducts; which will very well carry on themselves without our care; and
  leave our own business at random;