to　the　dining…room　stove。　This　room　and　the　salon　were　on　the　ground…
  floor　beneath　the　salon　and　bedroom　of　the　Abbe　Birotteau。
  When　the　vicar　had　received　his　cup　of　coffee；　duly　sugared；　from
  Mademoiselle　Gamard；　he　felt　chilled　to　the　bone　at　the　grim　silence
  in　which　he　was　forced　to　proceed　with　the　usually　gay　function　of
  breakfast。　He　dared　not　look　at　Troubert's　dried…up　features；　nor　at
  the　threatening　visage　of　the　old　maid；　and　he　therefore　turned；　to
  keep　himself　in　countenance；　to　the　plethoric　pug　which　was　lying　on　a
  cushion　near　the　stove；a　position　that　victim　of　obesity　seldom
  quitted；　having　a　little　plate　of　dainties　always　at　his　left　side；
  and　a　bowl　of　fresh　water　at　his　right。
  〃Well；　my　pretty；〃　said　the　vicar；　〃are　you　waiting　for　your　coffee？〃
  The　personage　thus　addressed；　one　of　the　most　important　in　the
  household；　though　the　least　troublesome　inasmuch　as　he　had　ceased　to
  bark　and　left　the　talking　to　his　mistress；　turned　his　little　eyes；
  sunk　in　rolls　of　fat；　upon　Birotteau。　Then　he　closed　them　peevishly。
  To　explain　the　misery　of　the　poor　vicar　it　should　be　said　that　being
  endowed　by　nature　with　an　empty　and　sonorous　loquacity；　like　the
  resounding　of　a　football；　he　was　in　the　habit　of　asserting；　without
  any　medical　reason　to　back　him；　that　speech　favored　digestion。
  Mademoiselle　Gamard；　who　believed　in　this　hygienic　doctrine；　had　not
  as　yet　refrained；　in　spite　of　their　coolness；　from　talking　at　meals；
  though；　for　the　last　few　mornings；　the　vicar　had　been　forced　to　strain
  his　mind　to　find　beguiling　topics　on　which　to　loosen　her　tongue。　If
  the　narrow　limits　of　this　history　permitted　us　to　report　even　one　of
  the　conversations　which　often　brought　a　bitter　and　sarcastic　smile　to
  the　lips　of　the　Abbe　Troubert；　it　would　offer　a　finished　picture　of
  the　Boeotian　life　of　the　provinces。　The　singular　revelations　of　the
  Abbe　Birotteau　and　Mademoiselle　Gamard　relating　to　their　personal
  opinions　on　politics；　religion；　and　literature　would　delight　observing
  minds。　It　would　be　highly　entertaining　to　transcribe　the　reasons　on
  which　they　mutually　doubted　the　death　of　Napoleon　in　1820；　or　the
  conjectures　by　which　they　mutually　believed　that　the　Dauphin　was
  living；rescued　from　the　Temple　in　the　hollow　of　a　huge　log　of　wood。
  Who　could　have　helped　laughing　to　hear　them　assert　and　prove；　by
  reasons　evidently　their　own；　that　the　King　of　France　alone　imposed　the
  taxes；　that　the　Chambers　were　convoked　to　destroy　the　clergy；　that
  thirteen　hundred　thousand　persons　had　perished　on　the　scaffold　during
  the　Revolution？　They　frequently　discussed　the　press；　without　either　of
  them　having　the　faintest　idea　of　what　that　modern　engine　really　was。
  Monsieur　Birotteau　listened　with　acceptance　to　Mademoiselle　Gamard
  when　she　told　him　that　a　man　who　ate　an　egg　every　morning　would　die　in
  a　year；　and　that　facts　proved　it；　that　a　roll　of　light　bread　eaten
  without　drinking　for　several　days　together　would　cure　sciatica；　that
  all　the　workmen　who　assisted　in　pulling　down　the　Abbey　Saint…Martin
  had　died　in　six　months；　that　a　certain　prefect；　under　orders　from
  Bonaparte；　had　done　his　best　to　damage　the　towers　of　Saint…Gatien；
  with　a　hundred　other　absurd　tales。
  But　on　this　occasion　poor　Birotteau　felt　he　was　tongue…tied；　and　he
  resigned　himself　to　eat　a　meal　without　engaging　in　conversation。　After
  a　while；　however；　the　thought　crossed　his　mind　that　silence　was
  dangerous　for　his　digestion；　and　he　boldly　remarked；　〃This　coffee　is
  excellent。〃
  That　act　of　courage　was　completely　wasted。　Then；　after　looking　at　the
  scrap　of　sky　visible　above　the　garden　between　the　two　buttresses　of
  Saint…Gatien；　the　vicar　again　summoned　nerve　to　say；　〃It　will　be　finer
  weather　to…day　than　it　was　yesterday。〃
  At　that　remark　Mademoiselle　Gamard　cast　her　most　gracious　look　on　the
  Abbe　Troubert；　and　immediately　turned　her　eyes　with　terrible　severity
  on　Birotteau；　who　fortunately　by　that　time　was　looking　on　his　plate。
  No　creature　of　the　feminine　gender　was　ever　more　capable　of　presenting
  to　the　mind　the　elegaic　nature　of　an　old　maid　than　Mademoiselle　Sophie
  Gamard。　In　order　to　describe　a　being　whose　character　gives　a　momentous
  interest　to　the　petty　events　of　the　present　drama　and　to　the　anterior
  lives　of　the　actors　in　it；　it　may　be　useful　to　give　a　summary　of　the
  ideas　which　find　expression　in　the　being　of　an　Old　Maid；remembering
  always　that　the　habits　of　life　form　the　soul；　and　the　soul　forms　the
  physical　presence。
  Though　all　things　in　society　as　well　as　in　the　universe　are　said　to
  have　a　purpose；　there　do　exist　here　below　certain　beings　whose　purpose
  and　utility　seem　inexplicable。　Moral　philosophy　and　political　economy
  both　condemn　the　individual　who　consumes　without　producing；　who　fills
  a　place　on　the　earth　but　does　not　shed　upon　it　either　good　or　evil；
  for　evil　is　sometimes　good　the　meaning　of　which　is　not　at　once　made
  manifest。　It　is　seldom　that　old　maids　of　their　own　motion　enter　the
  ranks　of　these　unproductive　beings。　Now；　if　the　consciousness　of　work
  done　gives　to　the　workers　a　sense　of　satisfaction　which　helps　them　to
  support　life；　the　certainty　of　being　a　useless　burden　must；　one　would
  think；　produce　a　contrary　effect；　and　fill　the　minds　of　such　fruitless
  beings　with　the　same　contempt　for　themselves　which　they　inspire　in
  others。　This　harsh　social　reprobation　is　one　of　the　causes　which
  contribute　to　fill　the　souls　of　old　maids　with　the　distress　that
  appears　in　their　faces。　Prejudice；　in　which　there　is　truth；　does　cast；
  throughout　the　world　but　especially　in　France；　a　great　stigma　on　the
  woman　with　whom　no　man　has　been　willing　to　share　the　blessings　or
  endure　the　ills　of　life。　Now；　there　comes　to　all　unmarried　women　a
  period　when　the　world；　be　it　right　or　wrong；　condemns　them　on　the　fact
  of　this　contempt；　this　rejection。　If　they　are　ugly；　the　goodness　of
  their　characters　ought　to　have　compensated　for　their　natural
  imperfections；　if；　on　the　contrary；　they　are　handsome；　that　fact
  argues　that　their　misfortune　has　some　serious　cause。　It　is　impossible
  to　say　which　of　the　two　classes　is　most　deserving　of　rejection。　If；　on
  the　other　hand；　their　celibacy　is　deliberate；　if　it　proceeds　from　a
  desire　for　independence；　neither　men　nor　mothers　will　forgive　their
  disloyalty　to　womanly　devotion；　evidenced　in　their　refusal　to　feed
  those　passions　which　render　their　sex　so　affecting。　To　renounce　the
  pangs　of　womanhood　is　to　abjure　its　poetry　and　cease　to　merit　the
  consolations　to　which　mothers　have　inalienable　rights。
  Moreover；　the　generous　sentiments；　the　exquisite　qualities　of　a　woman
  will　not　develop　unless　by　constant　exercise。　By　remaining　unmarried；
  a　creature　of　the　female　sex　becomes　void　of　meaning；　selfish　and
  cold；　she　creates　repulsion。　This　implacable　judgment　of　the　world　is
  unfortunately　too　just　to　leave　old　maids　in　ignorance　of　its　causes。
  Such　ideas　shoot　up　in　their　hearts　as　naturally　as　the　effects　of
  their　saddened　lives　appear　upon　their　features。　Consequently　they
  wither；　because　the　constant　expression　of　happiness　which　blooms　on
  the　faces　of　other　women　and　gives　so　soft　a　grace　to　their　movements
  has　never　existed　for　them。　They　grow　sharp　and　peevish　because　all
  human　beings　who　miss　their　vocation　are　unhappy；　they　suffer；　and
  suffering　gives　birth　to　the　bitterness　of　ill…will。　In　fact；　before
  an　old　maid　blames　herself　for　her　isolation　she　blames　others；　and
  there　is　but　one　step　between　reproach　and　the　desire　for　revenge。
  But　more　than　this；　the　ill　grace　and　want　of　charm　noticeable　in
  these　women　are　the　necessary　result　of　their　lives。　Never　having　felt
  a　desire　to　please；　elegance　and　the　refinements　of　good　taste　are
  foreign　to　them。　They　see　only　themselves　in　themselves。　This　instinct
  brings　them；　unconsciously；　to　choose　the　things　that　are　most
  convenient　to　themselves；　at　the　sacrifice　of　those　which　might　be
  more　agreeable　to　others。　Without　rendering　account　to　their　own　minds
  of　the　difference　between　themselves　and　other　women；　they　end　by
  feeling　that　difference　and　suffering　under　it。　Jealousy　is　an
  indelible　sentiment　in　the　female　breast。　An　old　maid's　soul　is
  jealous　and　yet　void；　for　she　knows　but　one　sidethe　miserable　side
  of　the　only　passion　men　will　allow　（because　it　flatters　them）　to
  women。　Thus　thwarted　in　all　their　hopes；　forced　to　deny　themselves　the
  natural　development　of　their　natures；　old　maids　endure　an　inward
  torment　to　which　they　never　grow　accustomed。　It　is　hard　at　any　age；
  above　all　for　a　woman；　to　see　a　feeling　of　repulsion　on　the　faces　of
  others；　when　her　true　destiny　is　to　move　all　hearts　about　her　to
  emotions　of　grace　and　love。　One　result　of　this　inward　trouble　is　that
  an　old　maid's　glance　is　always　oblique；　less　from　modesty　than　from
  fear　and　shame。　Such　beings　never　forgive　society　for　their　false
  position　because　they　never　forgive　themselves　for　it。
  Now　it　is　impossible　for　a　woman　who　is　p