第 67 节
作者:浮游云中      更新:2021-02-24 23:06      字数:9322
  individual discipline and restraint。  And while she had never considered
  these things; the spectacle of a philosophyembodied in himthat
  frankly and cynically threw them overboard was disconcerting。  He
  regarded her as his proselyte; he called her a Puritan; and he seemed
  more concerned that she should shed these relics of an ancestral code
  than acquire the doctrines of Sorel and Pouget。  And yet association with
  him presented the allurement of a dangerous adventure。  Intellectually he
  fascinated her; and still another motivewhich she partially disguised
  from herselfprevented her from repelling him。  That motive had to do
  with Ditmar。  She tried to put Ditmar from her mind; she sought in
  desperation; not only to keep busy; but to steep and lose herself in this
  fierce creed as an antidote to the insistent; throbbing pain that lay
  ambushed against her moments of idleness。  The second evening of her
  installation at Headquarters she had worked beyond the supper hour;
  helping Sanders with his accounts。  She was loath to go home。  And when
  at last she put on her hat and coat and entered the hall Rolfe; who had
  been talking to Jastro; immediately approached her。  His liquid eyes
  regarded her solicitously。
  〃You must be hungry;〃 he said。  〃Come out with me and have some supper。〃
  But she was not hungry; what she needed was air。  Then he would walk a
  little way with herhe wanted to talk to her。  She hesitated; and then
  consented。  A fierce hope had again taken possession of her; and when
  they came to Warren Street she turned into it。
  〃Where are you going?〃 Rolfe demanded。
  〃For a walk;〃 she said。  〃Aren't you coming?〃
  〃Will you have supper afterwards?〃
  〃Perhaps。〃
  He followed her; puzzled; yet piqued and excited by her manner; as with
  rapid steps she hurried along the pavement。  He tried to tell her what
  her friendship meant to him; they were; he declared; kindred spirits
  from the first time he had seen her; on the Common; he had known this。
  She scarcely heard him; she was thinking of Ditmar; and this was why she
  had led Rolfe into Warren Street they might meet Ditmar!  It was possible
  that he would be going to the mill at this time; after his dinner!  She
  scrutinized every distant figure; and when they reached the block in
  which he lived she walked more slowly。  From within the house came to
  her; faintly; the notes of a pianohis daughter Amy was practising。  It
  was the music; a hackneyed theme of Schubert's played heavily; that
  seemed to arouse the composite emotion of anger and hatred; yet of
  sustained attraction and wild regret she had felt before; but never so
  poignantly as now。  And she lingered; perversely resolved to steep
  herself in the agony。
  〃Who lives here〃 Rolfe asked。
  〃Mr。 Ditmar;〃 she answered。
  〃The agent of the Chippering Mill?〃
  She nodded。
  〃He's the worst of the lot;〃 Rolfe said angrily。  〃If it weren't for him;
  we'd have this strike won to…day。  He owns this town; he's run it to suit
  himself; He stiffens up the owners and holds the other mills in line。
  He's a type; a driver; the kind of man we must get rid of。  Look at him
  he lives in luxury while his people are starving。〃
  〃Get rid of!〃 repeated Janet; in an odd voice。
  〃Oh; I don't mean to shoot him;〃 Rolfe declared。  〃But he may get shot;
  for all I know; by some of these slaves he's made desperate。〃
  〃They wouldn't dare shoot him;〃 Janet said。  〃And whatever he is; he
  isn't a coward。  He's stronger than the others; he's more of a man。〃
  Rolfe looked at her curiously。
  〃What do you know about him?〃 he asked。
  〃II know all about him。  I was his stenographer。〃
  〃You!  His stenographer!  Then why are you herewith us?〃
  〃Because I hate him!〃 she cried vehemently。  〃Because I've learned that
  it's truewhat you say about the mastersthey only think of themselves
  and their kind; and not of us。  They use us。〃
  〃He tried to use you!  You loved him!〃
  〃How dare you say that!〃
  He fell back before her anger。
  〃I didn't mean to offend you;〃 he exclaimed。  〃I was jealousI'm jealous
  of every man you've known。  I want you。  I've never met a woman like
  you。〃
  They were the very words Ditmar had used!  She did not answer; and for a
  while they walked along in silence; leaving Warren Street and cutting
  across the city until they canoe in sight of the Common。  Rolfe drew
  nearer to her。
  〃Forgive me!〃 he pleaded。  〃You know I would not offend you。  Come; we'll
  have supper together; and I will teach you more of what you have to
  know。〃
  〃Where?〃 she asked。
  〃At the Hamptonit is a little cafe where we all go。  Perhaps you've
  been there。〃
  〃No;〃 said Janet。
  〃It doesn't compare with the cafes of Europeor of New York。  Perhaps we
  shall go to them sometime; together。  But it is cosy; and warm; and all
  the leaders will be there。  You'll comeyes?〃
  〃Yes; I'll come;〃 she said。。。。
  The Hampton was one of the city's second…class hotels; but sufficiently
  pretentious to have; in its basement; a 〃cafe〃 furnished in the 〃mission〃
  style of brass tacks and dull red leather。  In the warm; food…scented air
  fantastic wisps of smoke hung over the groups; among them Janet made out
  several of the itinerant leaders of Syndicalism; loose…tied; debonnair;
  giving a tremendous impression of freedom as they laughed and chatted
  with the women。  For there were women; ranging from the redoubtable
  Nellie Bond herself down to those who may be designated as campfollowers。
  Rolfe; as he led Janet to a table in a corner of the room; greeted his
  associates with easy camaraderie。  From Miss Bond he received an
  illuminating smile。  Janet wondered at her striking good looks; at the
  boldness and abandon with which she talked to Jastro or exchanged sallies
  across the room。  The atmosphere of this tawdry resort; formerly
  frequented by shop girls and travelling salesmen; was magically
  transformed by the presence of this company; made bohemian; cosmopolitan;
  exhilarating。  And Janet; her face flushed; sat gazing at the scene;
  while Rolfe consulted the bill of fare and chose a beefsteak and French
  fried potatoes。  The apathetic waiter in the soiled linen jacket he
  addressed as 〃comrade。〃  Janet protested when he ordered cocktails。
  〃You must learn to live; to relax; to enjoy yourself;〃 he declared。
  But a horror of liquor held her firm in her refusal。  Rolfe drank his;
  and while they awaited the beefsteak she was silent; the prey of certain
  misgivings that suddenly assailed her。  Lise; she remembered; had
  sometimes mentioned this place; though preferring Gruber's: and she was
  struck by the contrast between this spectacle and the grimness of the
  strike these people had come to encourage and sustain; the conflict in
  the streets; the suffering in the tenements。  She glanced at Rolfe;
  noting the manner in which he smoked cigarettes; sensually; as though
  seeking to wring out of each all there was to be got before flinging it
  down and lighting another。  Again she was struck by the anomaly of a
  religion that had indeed enthusiasms; sacrifices perhaps; but no
  disciplines。  He threw it out in snatches; this religion; while relating
  the histories of certain persons in the room: of Jastro; for instance;
  letting fall a hint to the effect that this evangelist and bliss Bond
  were dwelling together in more than amity。
  〃Then you don't believe in marriage?〃 she demanded; suddenly。
  Rolfe laughed。
  〃What is it;〃 he exclaimed; 〃but the survival of the system of property?
  It's slavery; taboo; a device upheld by the master class to keep women in
  bondage; in superstition; by inducing them to accept it as a decree of
  God。
  Did the masters themselves ever respect it; or any other decrees of God
  they preached to the slaves?  Read history; and you will see。  They had
  their loves; their mistresses。  Read the newspapers; and you will find
  out whether they respect it to…day。  But they are very anxious to have
  you and me respect it and all the other Christian commandments; because
  they will prevent us from being discontented。  They say that we must be
  satisfied with the situation in this world in which God has placed us;
  and we shall have our reward in the next。〃
  She shivered slightly; not only at the ideas thus abruptly enunciated;
  but because it occurred to her that those others must be taking for
  granted a certain relationship between herself and Rolfe。。。。  But
  presently; when the supper arrived; these feelings changed。  She was very
  hungry; and the effect of the food; of the hot coffee was to dispel her
  doubt and repugnance; to throw a glamour over the adventure; to restore
  to Rolfe's arguments an exciting and alluring appeal。  And with renewed
  physical energy she began to experience once more a sense of fellowship
  with these free and daring spirits who sought to avenge her wrongs and
  theirs。
  〃For us who create there are no rules of conduct; no conventions;〃 Rolfe
  was saying; 〃we do not care for the opinions of the middle class; of the
  bourgeois。  With us men and women are on an equality。  It is fear that
  has kept the workers down; and now we have cast that offwe know our
  strength。  As they say in Italy; il mondo e a chi se lo piglia; the world
  belongs to him who is bold。〃
  〃It