not　fail　in　any　point　of　your　part；　let　us　first　demand　our　fee　and
  then　vote　for　all　that　may　perchance　be　useful　for　our　partisans。。。。
  Ah！　what　am　I　saying？　I　meant　to　say；　for　our　fellow…citizens。　Let
  us　drive　away　these　men　of　the　city　who　used　to　stay　at　home　and
  chatter　round　the　table　in　the　days　when　only　an　obolus　was　paid；
  whereas　now　one　is　stifled　by　the　crowds　at　the　Pnyx。　No！　during　the
  archonship　of　generous　Myronides；　none　would　have　dared　to　let　himself
  be　paid　for　the　trouble　he　spent　over　public　business；　each　one
  brought　his　own　meal　of　bread；　a　couple　of　onions；　three　olives　and
  some　wine　in　a　little　wine…skin。　But　nowadays　we　run　here　to　earn
  the　three　obols；　for　the　citizen　has　become　as　mercenary　as　the
  stonemason。
  （The　CHORUS　marches　away。　BLEPYRUS　appears　in　the　doorway　of　his
  house；　wearing　PRAXAGORA's　Persian　sandals　and　saffron　robe。）
  BLEPYRUS
  What　does　this　mean？　My　wife　has　vanished！　it　is　nearly　daybreak
  and　she　does　not　return！　I　had　to　take　a　crap！　I　woke　up　and　hunted　in
  the　darkness　for　my　shoes　and　my　cloak；　but　grope　where　I　would；　I
  couldn't　find　them。　Meanwhile　Mr。　O'Shit　was　already　knocking　on　the
  door　and　I　had　only　just　time　to　seize　my　wife's　little　mantle　and　her
  Persian　slippers。　But　where　shall　I　find　a　place　where　I　can　take　a
  crap？　Bah！　One　place　is　as　good　as　another　at　night…time；　no　one
  will　see　me。　Ah！　what　a　damned　fool　I　was　to　take　a　wife　at　my　age；
  and　how　I　could　thrash　myself　for　having　acted　so　stupidly！　It's
  certainty　she's　not　gone　out　for　any　honest　purpose。　But　the　thing
  to　do　now　is　to　take　a　crap。
  （He　squats。）
  A　MAN　（looking　out　of　the　window　of　the　house　next　door）
  Who's　that？　Is　that　not　my　neighbour　Blepyrus？　Why；　yes；　it's　no
  other。　Tell　me；　what's　all　that　yellow　about　you？　Can　it　be　Cinesias
  who　has　befouled　you　so？
  BLEPYRUS
  No；　no；　I　only　slipped　on　my　wife's　tunic　to　come　out　in。
  MAN
  And　where　is　your　cloak？
  BLEPYRUS
  I　cannot　tell　you；　I　hunted　for　it　vainly　on　the　bed。
  MAN
  And　why　did　you　not　ask　your　wife　for　it？
  BLEPYRUS
  Ah！　why　indeed！　because　she　is　not　in　the　house；　she　has　run　away；
  and　I　greatly　fear　that　she　may　be　doing　me　an　ill　turn。
  MAN
  But；　by　Posidon；　it's　the　same　with　myself。　My　wife　has
  disappeared　with　my　cloak；　and　what　is　still　worse；　with　my　shoes　as
  well；　I　cannot　find　them　anywhere。
  BLEPYRUS
  Nor　can　I　my　Laconian　ones；　but　as　I　urgently　needed　to　crap；　I
  popped　my　feet　into　these　slippers；　so　as　not　to　soil　my　blanket；
  which　is　brand　new。
  MAN
  What　does　it　mean？　Can　some　friend　have　invited　her　to　a　feast？
  BLEPYRUS
  I　expect　so；　for　she　does　not　generally　misconduct　herself；　as　far
  as　I　know。
  MAN
  What　are　you　doing；　making　well…ropes？　Are　you　never　going　to　be
  done？　As　for　myself；　I　would　like　to　go　to　the　Assembly；　and　it　is
  time　to　start；　but　I've　got　to　find　my　cloak；　I　have　only　one。
  BLEPYRUS
  I　am　going　to　have　a　look　too；　when　I　have　finished　crapping；
  but　I　really　think　there　must　be　a　wild　pear　obstructing　my　rectum。
  MAN
  Is　it　the　one　which　Thrasybulus　spoke　about　to　the　Lacedaemonians？
  BLEPYRUS
  Oh！　oh！　oh！　stopped　up　I　am！　Whatever　am　I　to　do？　It's　not
  merely　for　the　present　that　I　am　frightened；　but　when　I　have　eaten；
  where　is　my　crap　to　find　an　outlet　now？　This　damned　McPear　fellow
  has　bolted　the　door。　Call　a　doctor；　but　who　is　the　cleverest　in　this
  branch　of　the　science？　Amynon？　Perhaps　he　would　not　come。　Ah！
  Antisthenes！　Let　him　be　brought　to　me；　cost　what　it　will。　To　judge
  by　his　noisy　sighs；　that　man　knows　what　an　arse　wants；　when　it　needs
  to　crap。　Oh！　venerated　Ilithyia！　I　shall　burst　unless　the　door　gives
  way。　Have　pity！　pity！　Let　me　not　become　a　thunder…mug　for　the　comic
  poets。
  （Enter　CHREMES；　returning　from　the　Assembly。）
  CHREMES
  Hi！　friend；　what　are　you　doing　there？　You're　not　crapping；　are
  you？
  BLEPYRUS　（finding　relief　at　last）
  Oh！　there！　it　is　over　and　I　can　get　up　again。
  CHREMES
  What's　this？　You　have　your　wife's　tunic　on。
  BLEPYRUS
  It　was　the　first　thing　that　came　to　my　hand　in　the　darkness。　But
  where　are　you　coming　from？
  CHREMES
  From　the　Assembly。
  BLEPYRUS
  Is　it　already　over　then？
  CHREMES
  Certainly。
  BLEPYRUS
  Why；　it　is　scarcely　daylight。
  CHREMES
  I　did　laugh；　ye　gods；　at　the　vermilion　rope…marks　that　were　to
  be　seen　all　about　the　Assembly。
  BLEPYRUS
  Did　you　get　the　triobolus？
  CHREMES
  Would　it　had　so　pleased　the　gods！　but　I　arrived　just　too　late；　and
  am　quite　ashamed　of　it；　I　bring　back　nothing　but　this　empty　wallet。
  BLEPYRUS
  But　why　is　that？
  CHREMES
  There　was　a　crowd；　such　as　has　never　been　seen　at　the　Pnyx；　and
  the　folk　looked　pale　and　wan；　like　so　many　shoemakers；　so　white　were
  they　in　hue；　both　I　and　many　another　had　to　go　without　the　triobolus。
  BLEPYRUS
  Then　if　I　went　now；　I　should　get　nothing。
  CHREMES
  No；　certainly　not；　nor　even　had　you　gone　at　the　second　cock…crow。
  BLEPYRUS
  Oh！　what　a　misfortune！　〃Oh；　Antilochus！　no　triobolus！　Even　death
  would　be　better！　I　am　undone！〃　But　what　can　have　attracted　such　a
  crowd　at　that　early　hour？
  CHREMES
  The　Prytanes　started　the　discussion　of　measures　closely　concerning
  the　safety　of　the　state；　immediately；　that　blear…eyed　fellow；　the
  son　of　Neoclides；　was　the　first　to　mount　the　platform。　Then　the　folk
  shouted　with　their　loudest　voice；　〃What！　he　dares　to　speak；　and
  that；　too；　when　the　safety　of　the　state　is　concerned；　and　he　a　man　who
  has　not　known　how　to　save　even　his　own　eyebrows！〃　He；　however；　shouted
  louder　than　all　of　them；　and　looking　at　them　asked；　〃Why；　what　ought　I
  to　have　done？〃
  BLEPYRUS
  Pound　together　garlic　and　laserpitium　juice；　add　to　this　mixture
  some　Laconian　spurge；　and　rub　it　well　into　the　eyelids　at　night。
  That's　what　I　should　have　answered；　had　I　been　there。
  CHREMES
  After　him　that　clever　rascal　Evaeon　began　to　speak；　he　was
  naked；　so　far　as　we　all　could　see；　but　he　declared　he　had　a　cloak；
  he　propounded　the　most　popular；　the　most　democratic；　doctrines。　〃You
  see；〃　he　said；　〃I　have　the　greatest　need　of　sixteen　drachmae；　the　cost
  of　a　new　cloak；　my　health　demands　it；　nevertheless　I　wish　first　to
  care　for　that　of　my　fellow…citizens　and　of　my　country。　If　the
  fullers　were　to　supply　tunics　to　the　indigent　at　the　approach　of
  winter；　none　would　be　exposed　to　pleurisy。　Let　him　who　has　neither
  beds　nor　coverlets　go　to　sleep　at　the　tanners'　after　taking　a　bath；
  and　if　they　shut　the　door　in　winter；　let　them　be　condemned　to　give　him
  three　goat…skins。〃
  BLEPYRUS
  By　Dionysus；　a　fine；　a　very　fine　notion！　Not　a　soul　will　vote
  against　his　proposal；　especially　if　he　adds　that　the　flour…sellers
  must　supply　the　poor　with　three　measures　of　corn；　or　else　suffer　the
  severest　penalties　of　the　law；　this　is　the　only　way　Nausicydes　can
  be　of　any　use　to　us。
  CHREMES
  Then　we　saw　a　handsome　young　man　rush　into　the　tribune；　be　was　all
  pink　and　white　like　young　Nicias；　and　he　began　to　say　that　the
  direction　of　matters　should　be　entrusted　to　the　women；　this　the
  crowd　of　shoemakers　began　applauding　with　all　their　might；　while　the
  country…folk　assailed　him　with　groans。
  BLEPYRUS
  And；　indeed；　they　did　well。
  CHREMES
  But　they　were　outnumbered；　and　the　orator　shouted　louder　than
  they；　saying　much　good　of　the　women　and　much　ill　of　you。
  BLEPYRUS　（eagerly）
  And　what　did　he　say？
  CHREMES
  First　he　said　you　were　a　rogue。。。
  BLEPYRUS
  And　you？
  CHREMES
  Wait　a　minute！。。。and　a　thief。。。
  BLEPYRUS
  I　alone？
  CHREMES
  And　an　informer。
  BLEPYRUS
  I　alone？
  CHREMES
  Why；　no；　by　the　gods！　this　whole　crowd　here。
  （He　points　to　the　audience。）
  BLEPYRUS
  And　who　avers　the　contrary？
  CHREMES
  He　maintained　that　women　were　both　clever　and　thrifty；　that　they
  never　divulged　the　Mysteries　of　Demeter；　while　you　and　I　go　about
  babbling　incessantly　about　whatever　happens　at　the　Senate。
  BLEPYRUS
  By　Hermes；　he　was　not　lying！
  CHREMES
  Then　he　added　that　the　women　lend　each　other　clothes；　trinkets
  of　gold　and　silver；　drinking…cups；　and　not　before　witnesses　too；　but
  all　by　themselves；　and　that　they　return　everything　with　exactitude
  without　ever　cheating　each　other；　whereas；　according　to　him；　we　are
  ever　ready　to　deny　the　loans　we　have　effected。
  BLEPYRUS
  Yes；　by　Posidon；　and　in　spite　of　witnesses。
  CHREMES
  Again；　he　said　that　women　were　not　informers；　nor　did　they　bring
  lawsuits；　nor　hatch　conspiracies；　in　short；　he　praised　the　women　in
  every　possible　manner。
  BLEPYRUS
  And　what　was　decided？
  CHREMES
  To　confide　the　direction　of　affa