第 100 节
作者:
散发弄舟 更新:2021-02-21 16:20 字数:9322
energy to his novel; and worked at it as his invention gave him
scope。 There was the more necessity that he should make progress;
from the fact that; having sent his mother the greater part of the
salary he had received from Mr。 Arnold; he was now reduced to his
last sovereign。 Poverty looks rather ugly when she comes so close
as this。 But she had not yet accosted him; and with a sovereign in
his pocket; and last week's rent paid; a bachelor is certainly not
poverty…stricken; at least when he is as independent; not only of
other people; but of himself; as Hugh was。 Still; without more
money than that a man walks in fetters; and is ready to forget that
the various restraints he is under are not incompatible with most
honourable freedom。 So Hugh worked as hard as he could to finish
his novel; and succeeded within a week。 Then the real anxiety
began。 He carried it; with much doubtful hope; to one of the
principal publishing houses。 Had he been more selfishly wise; he
would have put it into the hands of Falconer to negotiate for him。
But he thought he had given him quite trouble enough already。 So
he went without an introduction even。 The manuscript was received
politely; and attention was promised。 But a week passed; and
another; and another。 A human soul was in commotion about the meat
that perishethand the manuscript lay all the time
unread;forgotten in a drawer。
At length he reached his last coin。 He had had no meat for several
days; except once that he dined at Mrs。 Elton's。 But he would not
borrow till absolutely compelled; and sixpence would keep him alive
another day。 In the morning he had some breakfast (for he knew his
books were worth enough to pay all he owed Miss Talbot); and then he
wandered out。 Through the streets he paced and paced; looking in at
all the silversmiths' and printsellers' windows; and solacing his
poverty with a favourite amusement of his in uneasy circumstances;
an amusement cheap enough for a Scotchman reduced to his last
sixpencecastle…building。 This is not altogether a bad employment
where hope has laid the foundation; but it is rather a heartless one
where the imagination has to draw the ground plan as well as the
elevations。 The latter; however; was not quite Hugh's condition
yet。He returned at night; carefully avoiding the cook…shops and
their kindred snares; with a silver groat in his pocket still。 But
he crawled up stairs rather feebly; it must be confessed; for a
youth with limbs moulded in the fashion of his。
He found a letter waiting him; from a friend of his mother;
informing him that she was dangerously ill; and urging him to set
off immediately for home。 This was like the blast of fiery breath
from the dragon's maw; which overthrew the Red…cross knightbut
into the well of life; where all his wounds were healed;
andandwellboard and lodging provided him gratis。
When he had read the letter; he fell on his knees; and said to his
father in heaven: 〃What am I to do?〃
There was no lake with golden pieces in its bottom; whence a fish
might bring him a coin。 Nor in all the wide London lay there one he
could claim as his; but the groat in his pocket。
He rose with the simple resolution to go and tell Falconer。 He
went。 He was not at home。 Emboldened by necessity; Hugh left his
card; with the words on it: 〃Come to me; I need you。〃 He then
returned; packed a few necessaries; and sat down to wait。 But he
had not sat five minutes before Falconer entered。
〃What's the matter; Sutherland; my dear fellow? You haven't pricked
yourself with that skewer; have you?〃
Hugh handed him the letter with one hand; and when he had read it;
held out the fourpenny piece in the other hand; to be read likewise。
Falconer understood at once。
〃Sutherland;〃 he said; in a tone of reproof; 〃it is a shame of you
to forget that men are brothers。 Are not two who come out of the
heart of God; as closely related as if they had lain in the womb of
one mother? Why did you not tell me? You have sufferedI am sure
you have。〃
〃I havea little;〃 Hugh confessed。 〃I am getting rather low in
fact。 I haven't had quite enough to eat。〃
He said this to excuse the tears which Falconer's kindnessnot
hungercompelled from their cells。
〃But;〃 he added; 〃I would have come to you as soon as the fourpence
was gone; or at least; if I hadn't got another before I was very
hungry again。〃
〃Good heavens!〃 exclaimed Falconer; half angrily。 Then pulling out
his watch; 〃We have two hours;〃 said he; 〃before a train starts for
the north。 Come to my place。〃
Hugh rose and obeyed。 Falconer's attendant soon brought them a
plentiful supper from a neighbouring shop; after which Falconer got
out one of his bottles of port; well known to his more intimate
friends; and Hugh thought no more about money than if he had had his
purse full。 If it had not been for anxiety about his mother; he
would have been happier than he had ever been in his life before。
For; crossing in the night the wavering; heaving morass of the
world; had he not set his foot upon one spot which did not shake;
the summit; indeed; of a mighty Plutonic rock; that went down
widening away to the very centre of the earth? As he sped along in
the railway that night; the prophecy of thousands of years came
back: 〃A man shall be a hiding…place from the wind; a covert from
the tempest; the shadow of a great rock in a weary land。〃 And he
thought it would be a blessed time indeed; when this was just what a
man was。 And then he thought of the Son of Man; who; by being such
first; was enabling all his friends to be such too。 Of him Falconer
had already learned this 〃truth in the inward parts〃; and had found;
in the process of learning it; that this was the true nature which
God had made his from the first; no new thing superinduced upon it。
He had had but to clear away the rubbish of worldliness; which more
or less buries the best natures for a time; and so to find himself。
After Hugh had eaten and drunk; and thus once more experienced the
divinity that lay in food and wine; he went to take leave of his
friends at Mrs。 Elton's。 Like most invalids; Euphra was better in
the evening: she requested to see him。 He found her in bed; and
much wasted since he saw her last。 He could not keep the tears from
filling his eyes; for all the events of that day had brought them
near the surface。
〃Do not cry; dear friend;〃 she said sweetly。 〃There is no room for
me here any more; and I am sent for。〃
Hugh could not reply。 She went on:
〃I have written to Mr。 Arnold about the ring; and all you did to get
it。 Do you know he is going to marry Lady Emily?〃
Still Hugh could not answer。
Margaret stood on the other side of the bed; the graceful embodiment
of holy health; and in his sorrow; he could not help feeling the
beauty of her presence。 Her lovely hands were the servants of
Euphra; and her light; firm feet moved only in ministration。 He
felt that Euphra had room in the world while Margaret waited on her。
It is not house; and fire; and plenty of servants; and all the
things that money can procure; that make a homenot father or
mother or friends; but one heart which will not be weary of helping;
will not be offended with the petulance of sickness; nor the
ministrations needful to weakness: this 〃entire affection hating
nicer hands〃 will make a home of a cave in a rock; or a gipsy's
tent。 This Euphra had in Margaret; and Hugh saw it。
〃I trust you will find your mother better; Hugh〃 said Euphra。
〃I fear not;〃 answered he。
〃Well; Margaret has been teaching me; and I think I have learned it;
that death is not at all such a dreadful thing as it looks。 I said
to her: 'It is easy for you; Margaret; who are so far from death's
door。' But she told me that she had been all but dead once; and
that you had saved her life almost with your own。 Oh; Hugh! she is
such a dear!〃
Euphra smiled with ten times the fascination of any of her old
smiles; for the soul of the smile was love。
〃I shall never see you again; I daresay;〃 she went on。 〃My heart
thanks you; from its very depths; for your goodness to me。 It has
been a thousand times more than I deserve。〃
Hugh kissed in silence the wasted hand held out to him in adieu; and
departed。 And the world itself was a sad wandering star。
Falconer had called for him。 They drove to Miss Talbot's; where
Hugh got his 'bag of needments;' and bade his landlady good…bye for
a time。 Falconer then accompanied him to the railway。
Having left him for a moment; Falconer rejoined him; saying: 〃I have
your ticket;〃 and put him into a first…class carriage。
Hugh remonstrated。 Falconer replied:
〃I find this hulk of mine worth taking care of。 You will be twice
the good to your mother; if you reach her tolerably fresh。〃
He stood by the carriage door talking to him; till the train
started; walked alongside till it was fairly in motion; then;
bidding him good…bye; left in his hand a little packet; which Hugh;
opening it by the light of the lamp; found to consist of a few
sovereigns and a few shillings folded up in a twenty…pound…note。
I ought to tell one other little fact; however。 Jus