第 89 节
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散发弄舟 更新:2021-02-21 16:20 字数:9322
was it interpenetrated by; and respondent to; the uprising soul
within; that it radiated thought and feeling as if it had been all
spirit。 This beauty rose to its best in her eyes。 When she was
ministering to any one in need; her eyes seemed to worship the
object of her faithfulness; as if all the time she felt that she was
doing it unto Him。 Her deeds were devotion。 She was the receiver
and not the giver。 Before this; Euphra had seen only the still
waiting face; and; as I have said; she had been repelled by it。
Once within the sphere of the radiation of her attraction; she was
drawn towards her; as towards the haven of her peace: she loved her。
To this; it length; had her struggle with herself in the silence of
her own room; and her meditations on her couch; conducted her。
Shall we say that these alone had been and were leading her? Or
that to all these there was a hidden root; and an informing spirit?
Who would not rather believe that his thoughts come from an
infinite; self…sphered; self…constituting thought; than that they
rise somehow out of a blank abyss of darkness; and are only thought
when he thinks them; which thinking he cannot pre…determine or even
foresee?
When Euphra woke; her first breath was like a deep draught of
spiritual water。 She felt as if some sorrow had passed from her;
and some gladness come in its stead。 She thought and thought; and
found that the gladness was Margaret。 She had scarcely made the
discovery; when the door gently opened; and Margaret peeped in to
see if she were awake。
〃May I come in?〃 she said。
〃Yes; please; Margaret。〃
〃How do you feel to…day?〃
〃Oh; so much better; dear Margaret! Your kindness will make me
well。〃
〃I am so glad! Do lie still awhile; and I will bring you some
breakfast。 Mrs。 Elton will be so pleased to find you let me wait on
you!〃
〃She asked me; Margaret; if you should; but I was too miserableand
too naughty; for I did not like you。〃
〃I knew that; but I felt sure you would not dislike me always。〃
〃Why?〃
〃Because I could not help loving you。〃
〃Why did you love me?〃
〃I will tell you half the reason。Because you looked unhappy。〃
〃What was the other half?〃
〃That I cannotI mean I will not tell you。〃
〃Never?〃
〃Perhaps never。 But I don't know。Not now。〃
〃Then I must not ask you?〃
〃Noplease。〃
〃Very well; I won't。〃
〃Thank you。 I will go and get your breakfast。〃
〃What can she mean?〃 said Euphra to herself。
But she would never have found out。
CHAPTER XIV。
DAVID ELGINBROD。
He being dead yet speaketh。
HEB。; xi。 4。
In all 'he' did
Some figure of the golden times was hid。
DR。 DONNE。
》From this time; Margaret waited upon Euphra; as if she had been her
own maid。 Nor had Mrs。 Elton any cause of complaint; for Margaret
was always at hand when she was wanted。 Indeed; her mistress was
full of her praises。 Euphra said little。
Many and long were the conversations between the two girls; when all
but themselves were asleep。 Sometimes Harry made one of the
company; but they could always send him away when they wished to be
alone。 And now the teaching for which Euphra had longed; sprang in
a fountain at her own door。 It had been nigh her long; and she had
not known it; for its hour had not come。 Now she drank as only the
thirsty drink;as they drink whose very souls are fainting within
them for drought。
But how did Margaret embody her lessons?
The second night; she came to Euphra's room; and said:
〃Shall I tell you about my father to…night? Are; you able?〃
Euphra was delighted。 It was what she had been hoping for all day。
〃Do tell me。 I long to hear about him。〃
So they sat down; and Margaret began to talk about her childhood;
the cottage she lived in; the fir…wood all around it; the work she
used to do;her side; in short; of the story which; in the
commencement of this book; I have partly related from Hugh's side。
Summer and winter; spring…time and harvest; storm and sunshine; all
came into the tale。 Her mother came into it often; and often too;
though not so often; the grand form of her father appeared; remained
for a little while; and then passed away。 Every time Euphra saw him
thus in the mirror of Margaret's memory; she saw him more clearly
than before: she felt as if; soon; she should know him quite well。
Sometimes she asked a question or two; but generally she allowed
Margaret's words to flow unchecked; for she painted her pictures
better when the colours did not dry between。 They talked on; or
rather; Margaret talked and Euphra listened; far into the night。 At
length; Margaret stopped suddenly; for she became aware that a long
time had passed。 Looking at the clock on the chimney…piece; she
said:
〃I have done wrong to keep you up so late。 ComeI must get you to
bed。 You are an invalid; you know; and I am your nurse as well as
your maid。〃
〃You will come to…morrow night; then?〃
〃Yes; I will。〃
〃Then I will go to bed like a good child。〃
Margaret undressed her; and left her to the healing of sleep。
The next night she spoke again of her father; and what he taught
her。 Euphra had thought much about him; and at every fresh touch
which the story gave to the portrait; she knew him better; till at
last; even when circumstances not mentioned before came up; she
seemed to have known them from the beginning。
〃What was your father like; Margaret?〃
Margaret described him very nearly as I have done; from Hugh's
account; in the former part of the story。 Euphra said:
〃Ah! yes。 That is almost exactly as I had fancied him。 Is it not
strange?〃
〃It is very natural; I think;〃 answered Margaret。
〃I seem now to have known him for years。〃
But what is most worthy of record is; that ever as the picture of
David grew on the vision of Euphra; the idea of God was growing
unawares upon her inward sight。 She was learning more and more
about God all the time。 The sight of human excellence awoke a faint
Ideal of the divine perfection。 Faith came of itself; and abode;
and grew; for it needs but a vision of the Divine; and faith in God
is straightway born in the soul that beholds it。 Thus; faith and
sight are one。 The being of her father in heaven was no more
strange and far off from her; when she had seen such a father on
earth as Margaret's was。 It was not alone David's faith that begot
hers; but the man himself was a faith…begetting presence。 He was
the evidence of God with them。Thus he; being dead; yet spoke; and
the departed man was a present power。
Euphra began to read the story of the Gospel。 So did Harry。 They
found much on which to desire enlightenment; and they always applied
to Margaret for the light they needed。 It was long before she
ventured to say I think。 She always said:
〃My father used to say〃 or
〃I think my father would have said〃
It was not until Euphra was in great trouble some time after this;
and required the immediate consolation of personal testimony; that
Margaret spoke as from herself; and then she spoke with positive
assurance of faith。 She did not then even say I think; but; I am
sure; I know; I have seen。
Many interviews of this sort did not take place between them before
Euphra; in her turn; began to confide her history to Margaret。
It was a strangely different onefull of outward event and physical
trouble; but; till it approached the last stages; wonderfully barren
as to inward production or development。 It was a history of
Euphra's circumstances and peculiarities; not of Euphra herself。
Till of late; she had scarcely had any history。 Margaret's; on the
contrary; was a true history; for; with much of the monotonous in
circumstance; it described individual growth; and the change of
progress。 Where there is no change there can be no history; and as
all change is either growth or decay; all history must describe
progress or retrogression。 The former had now begun for Euphra as
well; and it was one proof of it that she told Margaret all I have
already recorded for my readers; at least as far as it bore against
herself。 How much more she told her I am unable to say; but after
she had told it; Euphra was still more humble towards Margaret; and
Margaret more tender; more full of service; if possible; and more
devoted to Euphra。
CHAPTER XV。
MARGARET'S SECRET。
Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds;
Or bends with the remover to remove。
SHAKSPERE。Sonnet cxvi。
Margaret could not proceed very far in the story of her life;
without making some reference to Hugh Sutherland。 But she carefully
avoided mentioning his name。 Perhaps no one less calm; and free
from the operation of excitement; could have been so successful in
suppressing it。
〃Ah!〃 said Euphra; one day; 〃your history is a little like mine
there; a tutor comes into them both。 Did you not fall dreadfully in
love with him?〃
〃I loved him very much。〃
〃Where is he now?〃
〃In London; I believe。〃
〃Do you never see him?〃
〃No。〃
〃Have you never seen him since he left your homewith the curious
name?〃
〃Yes; but not spoken to him。〃
〃Where?〃
Margaret was silent。 Euphra knew her