The　Register
  by　William　D。　Howells
  I。
  SCENE：　　In　an　upper　chamber　of　a　boarding…house　in　Melanchthon　Place；
  Boston；　a　mature；　plain　young　lady；　with　every　appearance　of
  establishing　herself　in　the　room　for　the　first　time；　moves　about；
  bestowing　little　touches　of　decoration　here　and　there；　and　talking
  with　another　young　lady；　whose　voice　comes　through　the　open　doorway
  of　an　inner　room。
  MISS　ETHEL　REED；　from　within：　　〃What　in　the　world　are　you　doing；
  Nettie？〃
  MISS　HENRIETTA　SPAULDING：　　〃Oh；　sticking　up　a　household　god　or　two。
  What　are　you　doing？〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Despairing。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Still？〃
  MISS　REED；　tragically：　　〃Still！　　How　soon　did　you　expect　me　to　stop？
  I　am　here　on　the　sofa；　where　I　flung　myself　two　hours　ago；　and　I
  don't　think　I　shall　ever　get　up。　　There　is　no　reason　WHY　I　ever
  should。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　suggestively：　　〃Dinner。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Oh；　dinner！　　Dinner；　to　a　broken　heart！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃I　don't　believe　your　heart　is　broken。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃But　I　tell　you　it　is！　　I　ought　to　know　when　my　own　heart
  is　broken；　I　should　hope。　　What　makes　you　think　it　isn't？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Oh；　it's　happened　so　often！〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃But　this　is　a　real　case。　　You　ought　to　feel　my　forehead。
  It's　as　hot！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃You　ought　to　get　up　and　help　me　put　this　room　to
  rights；　and　then　you　would　feel　better。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃No；　I　should　feel　worse。　　The　idea　of　household　gods
  makes　me　sick。　　Sylvan　deities　are　what　I　want；　the　great　god　Pan
  among　the　cat…tails　and　arrow…heads　in　the　'ma'sh'　at　Ponkwasset；　the
  dryads　of　the　birch　woodsthere　are　no　oaks；　the　nymphs　that　haunt
  the　heights　and　hollows　of　the　dear　old　mountain；　the〃　…
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Wha…a…at？　　I　can't　hear　a　word　you　say。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃That's　because　you　keep　fussing　about　so。　　Why　don't　you
  be　quiet；　if　you　want　to　hear？〃　　She　lifts　her　voice　to　its　highest
  pitch；　with　a　pause　for　distinctness　between　the　words：　　〃I'm　heart…
  broken　forPonkwasset。　　The　dryadsof　thebirch　woods。　　The
  nymphsand　the　greatgodPanin　the　reedsby　the　river。　　And
  allthatsort　ofthing！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃You　know　very　well　you're　not。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃I'm　not？　　What's　the　reason　I'm　not？　　Then；　what　am　I
  heart…broken　for？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃You're　not　heart…broken　at　all。　　You　know　very　well
  that　he'll　call　before　we've　been　here　twenty…four　hours。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Who？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃The　great　god　Pan。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Oh；　how　cruel　you　are；　to　mock　me　so！　　Come　in　here；　and
  sympathize　a　little！　　Do；　Nettie。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃No；　you　come　out　here　and　utilize　a　little。　　I'm
  acting　for　your　best　good；　as　they　say　at　Ponkwasset。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃When　they　want　to　be　disagreeable！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃If　this　room　isn't　in　order　by　the　time　he　calls；
  you'll　be　everlastingly　disgraced。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃I'm　that　now。　　I　can't　be　more　sothere's　that　comfort。
  What　makes　you　think　he'll　call？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Because　he's　a　gentleman；　and　will　want　to
  apologize。　　He　behaved　very　rudely　to　you。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃No；　Nettie；　_I_　behaved　rudely　to　HIM。　　Yes！　　Besides；
  if　he　behaved　rudely；　he　was　no　gentleman。　　It's　a　contradiction　in
  terms；　don't　you　see？　　But　I'll　tell　you　what　I'm　going　to　do　if　he
  comes。　　I'm　going　to　show　a　proper　spirit　for　once　in　my　life。　　I'm
  going　to　refuse　to　see　him。　　You've　got　to　see　him。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Nonsense！〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Why　nonsense？　　Oh；　why？　　Expound！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Because　he　wasn't　rude　to　me；　and　he　doesn't　want
  to　see　me。　　Because　I'm　plain；　and　you're　pretty。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃I'm　NOT！　　You　know　it　perfectly　well。　　I'm　hideous。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Because　I'm　poor；　and　you're　a　person　of
  independent　property。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃DEPENDENT　property；　I　should　call　it：　　just　enough　to　be
  useless　on！　　But　that's　insulting　to　HIM。　　How　can　you　say　it's
  because　I　have　a　little　money？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Well；　then；　I　won't。　　I　take　it　back。　　I'll　say
  it's　because　you're　young；　and　I'm　old。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃You're　NOT　old。　　You're　as　young　as　anybody；　Nettie
  Spaulding。　　And　you　know　I'm　not　young；　I'm　twenty…seven；　if　I'm　a
  day。　　I'm　just　dropping　into　the　grave。　　But　I　can't　argue　with　you；
  miles　off　so；　any　longer。〃　Miss　Reed　appears　at　the　open　door；
  dragging　languidly　after　her　the　shawl　which　she　had　evidently　drawn
  round　her　on　the　sofa；　her　fair　hair　is　a　little　disordered；　and　she
  presses　it　into　shape　with　one　hand　as　she　comes　forward；　a　lovely
  flush　vies　with　a　heavenly　pallor　in　her　cheeks；　she　looks　a　little
  pensive　in　the　arching　eyebrows；　and　a　little　humorous　about　the
  dimpled　mouth。　　〃Now　I　can　prove　that　you　are　entirely　wrong。　　Where…
  …were　you？This　room　is　rather　an　improvement　over　the　one　we　had
  last　winter。　　There　is　more　of　a　view〃she　goes　to　the　window〃of
  the　houses　across　the　Place；　and　I　always　think　the　swell　front　gives
  a　pretty　shape　to　a　room。　　I'm　sorry　they've　stopped　building　them。
  Your　piano　goes　very　nicely　into　that　little　alcove。　　Yes；　we're
  quite　palatial。　　And；　on　the　whole；　I'm　glad　there's　no　fireplace。
  It's　a　pleasure　at　times；　but　for　the　most　part　it's　a　vanity　and　a
  vexation；　getting　dust　and　ashes　over　everything。　　Yes；　after　all；
  give　me　the　good　old…fashioned；　clean；　convenient　register！　　Ugh！　　My
  feet　are　like　ice。〃　　She　pulls　an　easy…chair　up　to　the　register　in
  the　corner　of　the　room；　and　pushes　open　its　valves　with　the　toe　of
  her　slipper。　　As　she　settles　herself　luxuriously　in　the　chair；　and
  poises　her　feet　daintily　over　the　register：　　〃Ah；　this　is　something
  like！　　Henrietta　Spaulding；　ma'am！　　Did　I　ever　tell　you　that　you　were
  the　best　friend　I　have　in　the　world？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　who　continues　her　work　of　arranging　the　room：
  〃Often。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Did　you　ever　believe　it？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Never。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Why？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　thoughtfully　regarding　a　vase　which　she　holds　in　her
  hand；　after　several　times　shifting　it　from　a　bracket　to　the　corner　of
  her　piano　and　back：　　〃I　wish　I　could　tell　where　you　do　look　best！〃
  MISS　REED；　leaning　forward　wistfully；　with　her　hands　clasped　and
  resting　on　her　knees：　　〃I　wish　you　would　tell　me　WHY　you　don't
  believe　you're　the　best　friend　I　have　in　the　world。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　finally　placing　the　vase　on　the　bracket：　　〃Because
  you've　said　so　too　often。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Oh；　that's　no　reason！　　I　can　prove　to　you　that　you　are。
  Who　else　but　you　would　have　taken　in　a　homeless　and　friendless
  creature　like　me；　and　let　her　stay　bothering　round　in　demoralizing
  idleness；　while　you　were　seriously　teaching　the　young　idea　how　to
  drub　the　piano？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Anybody　who　wanted　a　room…mate　as　much　as　I　did；
  and　could　have　found　one　willing　to　pay　more　than　her　share　of　the
  lodging。〃
  MISS　REED；　thoughtfully：　　〃Do　you　think　so；　Henrietta？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃I　know　so。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃And　you're　not　afraid　that　you　wrong　yourself？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Not　the　least。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Well；　be　it　soas　they　say　in　novels。　　I　will　not
  contradict　you；　I　will　not　say　you　are　my　BEST　friend；　I　will　merely
  say　that　you　are　my　ONLY　friend。　　Come　here；　Henrietta。　　Draw　up　your
  chair；　and　put　your　little　hand　in　mine。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　with　severe　distrust：　　〃What　do　you　want；　Ethel
  Reed？〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃I　wantI　wantto　talk　it　over　with　you。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　recoiling：　　〃I　knew　it！　　Well；　now；　we've　talked　it
  over　enough；　we've　talked　it　over　till　there's　nothing　left　of　it。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Oh；　there's　everything　left！　　It　remains　in　all　its
  original　enormity。　　Perhaps　we　shall　get　some　new　light　upon　it。〃
  She　extends　a　pleading　hand　towards　Miss　Spaulding。　　〃Come；
  Henrietta；　my　only　friend；　shake！as　the　'good　Indians'　say。　　Let
  your　Ethel　pour　her　hackneyed　sorrows　into　your　bosom。　　Such　an
  uncomfortable　image；　it　always　seems；　doesn't　it；　pouring　sorrows
  into　bosoms！　　Come！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　decidedly：　　〃No；　I　won't！　　And　you　needn't　try
  wheedling　any　longer。　　I　won't　sympathize　with　you　on　that　basis　at
  all。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃What　shall　I　try；　then；　if　you　won't　let　me　try
  wheedling？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING；　going　to　the　piano　and　opening　it：　　〃Try　courage；　try
  self…respect。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Oh；　dear！　when　I　haven't　a　morsel　of　either。　　Are　you
  going　to　practise；　you　cruel　maid？〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Of　course　I　am。　　It's　half…past　four；　and　if　I
  don't　do　it　now　I　sha'n't　be　prepared　to…morrow　for　Miss　Robins：　　she
  takes　this　piece。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Well；　well；　perhaps　it's　all　for　the　best。　　If　music　be
  the　food　ofumph…ump！you　know　what！play　on。〃　　They　both　laugh；
  and　Miss　Spaulding　pushes　back　a　little　from　the　piano；　and　wheels
  toward　her　friend；　letting　one　hand　rest　slightly　on　the　keys。
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Ethel　Reed；　you're　the　most　ridiculous　girl　in　the
  world。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Correct！〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃And　I　don't　believe　you　ever　were　in　love；　or　ever
  will　be。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃Ah；　there　you　wrong　me；　Henrietta！　　I　have　been；　and　I
  shall　belots　of　times。〃
  MISS　SPAULDING：　　〃Well；　what　do　you　want　to　say　now？　　You　must　hurry；
  for　I　can't　lose　any　more　time。〃
  MISS　REED：　　〃I　will　free　my　mind　with　neatness　and　despatch。　　I
  simply　wish　to　go　over　th