第 65 节
作者:
不言败 更新:2021-02-21 15:47 字数:9321
died and that daughter; and how he could have given the daughter all
the money。。。 which。。。〃
〃Which cost you such sacrifice; mother;〃 put in Avdotya Romanovna。
〃He was not himself yesterday;〃 Razumihin said thoughtfully; 〃if you
only knew what he was up to in a restaurant yesterday; though there
was sense in it too。。。。 Hm! He did say something; as we were going
home yesterday evening; about a dead man and a girl; but I didn't
understand a word。。。。 But last night; I myself。。。〃
〃The best thing; mother; will be for us to go to him ourselves and
there I assure you we shall see at once what's to be done。 Besides;
it's getting late… good heavens; it's past ten;〃 she cried looking
at a splendid gold enamelled watch which hung round her neck on a thin
Venetian chain; and looked entirely out of keeping with the rest of
her dress。 〃A present from her fiance;〃 thought Razumihin。
〃We must start; Dounia; we must start;〃 her mother cried in a
flutter。 〃He will be thinking we are still angry after yesterday; from
our coming so late。 Merciful heavens!〃
While she said this she was hurriedly putting on her hat and mantle;
Dounia; too; put on her things。 Her gloves; as Razumihin noticed; were
not merely shabby but had holes in them; and yet this evident
poverty gave the two ladies an air of special dignity; which is always
found in people who know how to wear poor clothes。 Razumihin looked
reverently at Dounia and felt proud of escorting her。 〃The queen who
mended her stockings in prison;〃 he thought; 〃must have looked then
every inch a queen and even more a queen than at sumptuous banquets
and levees。〃
〃My God;〃 exclaimed Pulcheria Alexandrovna; 〃little did I think that
I should ever fear seeing my son; my darling; darling Rodya! I am
afraid; Dmitri Prokofitch;〃 she added; glancing at him timidly。
〃Don't be afraid; mother;〃 said Dounia; kissing her; 〃better have
faith in him。〃
〃Oh; dear; I have faith in him; but I haven't slept all night;〃
exclaimed the poor woman。
They came out into the street。
〃Do you know; Dounia; when I dozed a little this morning I dreamed
of Marfa Petrovna。。。 she was all in white。。。 she came up to me; took
my hand; and shook her head at me; but so sternly as though she were
blaming me。。。。 Is that a good omen? Oh; dear me! You don't know;
Dmitri Prokofitch; that Marfa Petrovna's dead!〃
〃No; I didn't know; who is Marfa Petrovna?〃
〃She died suddenly; and only fancy。。。〃
〃Afterwards; mamma;〃 put in Dounia。 〃He doesn't know who Marfa
Petrovna is。〃
〃Ah; you don't know? And I was thinking that you knew all about
us。 Forgive me; Dmitri Prokofitch; I don't know what I am thinking
about these last few days。 I look upon you really as a providence
for us; and so I took it for granted that you knew all about us。 I
look on you as a relation。。。。 Don't be angry with me for saying so。
Dear me; what's the matter with your right hand? Have you knocked it?〃
〃Yes; I bruised it;〃 muttered Razumihin overjoyed。
〃I sometimes speak too much from the heart; so that Dounia finds
fault with me。。。。 But; dear me; what a cupboard he lives in! I
wonder whether he is awake? Does this woman; his landlady; consider it
a room? Listen; you say he does not like to show his feelings; so
perhaps I shall annoy him with my。。。 weaknesses? Do advise me;
Dmitri Prokofitch; how am I to treat him? I feel quite distracted; you
know。〃
〃Don't question him too much about anything if you see him frown!
don't ask him too much about his health; he doesn't like that。〃
〃Ah; Dmitri Prokofitch; how hard it is to be a mother! But here
are the stairs。。。。 What an awful staircase!〃
〃Mother; you are quite pale; don't distress yourself; darling;〃 said
Dounia caressing her; then with flashing eyes she added: 〃He ought
to be happy at seeing you; and you are tormenting yourself so。〃
〃Wait; I'll peep in and see whether he has waked up。〃
The ladies slowly followed Razumihin; who went on before; and when
they reached the landlady's door on the fourth storey; they noticed
that her door was a tiny crack open and that two keen black eyes
were watching them from the darkness within。 When their eyes met;
the door was suddenly shut with such a slam that Pulcheria
Alexandrovna almost cried out。
Chapter Three
〃HE IS well; quite well!〃 Zossimov cried cheerfully as they entered。
He had come in ten minutes earlier and was sitting in the same place
as before; on the sofa。 Raskolnikov was sitting in the opposite
corner; fully dressed and carefully washed and combed; as he had not
been for some time past。 The room was immediately crowded; yet
Nastasya managed to follow the visitors in and stayed to listen。
Raskolnikov really was almost well; as compared with his condition
the day before; but he was still pale; listless; and sombre。 He looked
like a wounded man or one who has undergone some terrible physical
suffering。 His brows were knitted; his lips compressed; his eyes
feverish。 He spoke little and reluctantly; as though performing a
duty; and there was a restlessness in his movements。
He only wanted a sling on his arm or a bandage on his finger to
complete the impression of a man with a painful abscess or a broken
arm。 The pale; sombre face lighted up for a moment when his mother and
sister entered; but this only gave it a look of more intense
suffering; in place of its listless dejection。 The light soon died
away; but the look of suffering remained; and Zossimov; watching and
studying his patient with all the zest of a young doctor beginning
to practise; noticed in him no joy at the arrival of his mother and
sister; but a sort of bitter; hidden determination to bear another
hour or two of inevitable torture。 He saw later that almost every word
of the following conversation seemed to touch on some sore place and
irritate it。 But at the same time he marvelled at the power of
controlling himself and hiding his feelings in a patient who the
previous day had; like a monomaniac; fallen into a frenzy at the
slightest word。
〃Yes; I see myself now that I am almost well;〃 said Raskolnikov;
giving his mother and sister a kiss of welcome which made Pulcheria
Alexandrovna radiant at once。 〃And I don't say this as I did
yesterday;〃 he said addressing Razumihin; with a friendly pressure
of his hand。
〃Yes; indeed; I am quite surprised at him to…day;〃 began Zossimov;
much delighted at the ladies' entrance; for he had not succeeded in
keeping up a conversation with his patient for ten minutes。 〃In
another three or four days; if he goes on like this; he will be just
as before; that is; as he was a month ago; or two。。。 or perhaps even
three。 This has been coming on for a long while。。。。 eh? Confess;
now; that it has been perhaps your own fault?〃 he added; with a
tentative smile; as though still afraid of irritating him。
〃It is very possible;〃 answered Raskolnikov coldly。
〃I should say; too;〃 continued Zossimov with zest; 〃that your
complete recovery depends solely on yourself。 Now that one can talk to
you; I should like to impress upon you that it is essential to avoid
the elementary; so to speak; fundamental causes tending to produce
your morbid condition: in that