第 27 节
作者:浮游云中      更新:2021-02-20 16:27      字数:9322
  upon him。       His feelings were of so complex a nature; he was anxious to
  keep     his  more    magnanimous        impulses     active;   and   he   strove   hard   to
  convince himself that she was still the same to him as she had been before
  they had ever parted。        But; alas! though the heart be warm and generous;
  the eye is a merciless critic。         And the man who had moved on the wide
  arena   of   the   world;   whose   mind   had   housed   the   large   thoughts   of   this
  century;     and   expanded     with   its  invigorating     breath;was     he  to  blame
  because he had unconsciously outgrown his old provincial self; and could
  no more judge by its standards?
  Bertha's father was a peasant; but he had; by his lumber trade; acquired
  what   in   Norway   was   called   a   very   handsome   fortune。       He   received   his
  guest with dignified reserve; and Ralph thought he detected in his eyes a
  lurking look of distrust。        〃I know your errand;〃 that look seemed to say;
  〃but you had better give it up at once。           It will be of no use for you to try。〃
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  And   after   supper;   as   Ralph   and   Bertha   sat   talking   confidingly   with
  each other at the window; he sent his daughter a quick; sharp glance; and
  then; without ceremony; commanded her to go to bed。                     Ralph's heart gave
  a great thump within him; not because he feared the old man; but because
  his words; as well as his glances; revealed to him the sad history of these
  long;   patient   years。     He   doubted   no   longer   that   the   love   which   he   had
  once   so   ardently  desired   was   his   at   last;   and   he   made   a   silent vow  that;
  come what might; he would remain faithful。
  As   he   came   down   to   breakfast   the   next   morning;   he   found   Bertha
  sitting at the window; engaged in hemming what appeared to be a rough
  kitchen   towel。      She   bent   eagerly  over   her   work;   and   only   a   vivid   flush
  upon her cheek told him that she had noticed his coming。                    He took a chair;
  seated   himself   opposite   her;   and   bade   her   〃good…morning。〃           She   raised
  her head; and showed him a sweet; troubled countenance; which the early
  sunlight illumined with a high spiritual beauty。                It reminded him forcibly
  of   those   pale;   sweet…faced   saints   of   Fra   Angelico;   with   whom   the   frail
  flesh seems ever on the point of yielding to the ardent aspirations of the
  spirit。    And still; even in this moment he could not prevent his eyes from
  observing that one side of her forefinger was rough from sewing; and that
  the   whiteness   of   her   arm;   which   the   loose   sleeves   displayed;   contrasted
  strongly with the browned and sun…burned complexion of her hands。
  After breakfast   they  again walked   together   on the   beach;   and   Ralph;
  having once formed his resolution; now talked freely of the New World
  of his sphere of activity there; of his friends and of his plans for the future;
  and she listened to him with a mild; perplexed look in her eyes; as if trying
  vainly to follow the flight of his thoughts。             And he wondered; with secret
  dismay; whether she was still the same strong; brave…hearted girl whom he
  had   once   accounted   almost   bold;   whether   the   life   in   this   narrow   valley;
  amid a hundred petty and depressing cares; had not cramped her spiritual
  growth;   and   narrowed   the   sphere   of   her   thought。        Or   was   she   still   the
  same; and was it only he who had changed?                   At last he gave utterance to
  his   wonder;   and   she   answered   him   in   those   grave;   earnest   tones   which
  seemed in themselves to be half a refutation of his doubts。
  〃It was easy for me to give you daring advice; then; Ralph;〃 she said。
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  〃Like most school… girls; I thought that life was a great and glorious thing;
  and   that   happiness   was   a   fruit   which   hung   within   reach   of   every   hand。
  Now I have lived for six years trying single…handed to relieve the want and
  suffering   of   the   needy   people   with   whom   I   come   in   contact;   and   their
  squalor and wretchedness have sickened me; and; what is still worse; I feel
  that all I can do is as a drop in the ocean; and after all; amounts to nothing。
  I   know   I   am   no   longer   the   same   reckless   girl;   who;   with   the   very   best
  intention;  sent   you   wandering   through   the   wide   world;   and   I   thank   God
  that it proved to be for your good; although the whole now appears quite
  incredible   to   me。    My   thoughts   have   moved   so   long   within   the   narrow
  circle of these mountains that they have lost their youthful elasticity; and
  can no more rise above them。〃
  Ralph detected; in the midst of her despondency; a spark of her former
  fire;   and   grew   eloquent   in   his   endeavors   to   persuade   her   that   she   was
  unjust to herself; and that there was but a wider sphere of life needed to
  develop all the latent powers of her rich nature。
  At the dinner…table; her father again sat eyeing his guest with that same
  cold look of distrust and suspicion。           And when the meal was at an end; he
  rose abruptly and called his daughter into another room。                 Presently Ralph
  heard his angry voice resounding through the house; interrupted now and
  then   by   a   woman's     sobs;   and   a  subdued;    passionate   pleading。      When
  Bertha again entered the room; her eyes were very red; and he saw that she
  had been weeping。          She threw a   shawl over her shoulders; beckoned   to
  him   with   her   hand;   and   he   arose   and   followed   her。    She   led   the   way
  silently until they reached a thick copse of birch and alder near the strand。
  She dropped down upon a bench between two trees; and he took his seat at
  her side。
  〃Ralph;〃 began she; with a visible effort; 〃I hardly know what to say to
  you; but there is something which I must tell youmy father wishes you to
  leave us at once。〃
  〃And YOU; Bertha?〃
  〃WellyesI wish it too。〃
  She saw the painful shock which her words gave him; and she strove
  hard to   speak。     Her lips trembled; her eyes   became   suffused   with tears;
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  which grew and grew; but never fell; she could not utter a word。
  〃Well; Bertha;〃 answered he; with a little quiver in his voice; 〃if you;
  too; wish me to go; I shall not tarry。        Good…bye。〃
  He rose quickly; and; with averted face; held out his hand to her; but as
  she made no motion to grasp the hand; he began distractedly to button his
  coat; and moved slowly away。
  〃Ralph。〃
  He   turned   sharply;  and;   before he knew  it;  she lay  sobbing   upon   his
  breast。
  〃Ralph;〃 she murmured; while the tears almost choked her words; 〃I
  could not have you leave me thus。           It is hard enoughit is hard enough〃
  〃What is hard; beloved?〃
  She raised her head abruptly; and turned upon him a gaze full of hope
  and doubt; and sweet perplexity。
  〃Ah; no; you do not love me;〃 she whispered; sadly。
  〃Why should I come to seek you; after these many years; dearest; if I
  did not wish to make you my wife before God and men?                    Why should I
  〃
  〃Ah;   yes;   I   know;〃   she   interrupted   him   with   a   fresh   fit   of   weeping;
  〃you are too good and honest to wish to throw me away; now when you
  have seen how my soul has hungered for the sight of you these many years;
  how even now I cling to you with a despairing clutch。                  But you cannot
  disguise yourself; Ralph; and I saw from the first moment that you loved
  me no more。〃
  〃Do not be such an unreasonable child;〃 he remonstrated; feebly。                   〃I
  do   not   love   you   with   the   wild;   irrational   passion   of   former   years;   but   I
  have the tenderest regard for you; and my heart warms at the sight of your
  sweet face; and I shall do all in my power to make you as happy as any
  man can make you who〃
  〃Who does not love me;〃 she finished。
  A  sudden   shudder   seemed   to   shake   her   whole   frame;   and   she   drew
  herself more tightly up to him。
  〃Ah;   no;〃   she   continued;   after   a   while;   sinking   back   upon   her   seat。
  〃It   is   a   hopeless   thing   to  compel   a   reluctant   heart。 I   w