第 11 节
作者:浮游云中      更新:2021-02-20 16:27      字数:9322
  of the street annoyed him and made him childishly fretful; and the solitude
  of   his   own   room   seemed   still   more   dreary   and   depressing。      He   went
  mechanically through the daily routine of his duties as if the soul had been
  taken out of his work; and left his life all barrenness and desolation。                He
  moved restlessly from place to place; roamed at all times of the day and
  night through the city and its suburbs; trying vainly to exhaust his physical
  strength; gradually; as his lethargy deepened into a numb; helpless despair;
  it seemed somehow to impart a certain toughness to his otherwise delicate
  frame。     Olson; who was now a junior partner in the firm of Remsen; Van
  Kirk and Co。; stood by him faithfully in these days of sorrow。                   He was
  never    effusive    in  his  sympathy;    but   was   patiently   forbearing    with   his
  friend's whims and moods; and humored him as if he had been a sick child
  intrusted    to  his   custody。    That    Edith   might    be   the  moving     cause   of
  Olson's     kindness    was    a  thought    which;    strangely    enough;    had   never
  occurred to Halfdan。
  At   last;   when   spring   came;   the   vacancy   of   his   mind   was   suddenly
  invaded with a strong desire to revisit his native land。              He disclosed his
  plan   to   Olson;   who;   after   due   deliberation   and   several   visits   to   the   Van
  Kirk mansion; decided that the pleasure of seeing his old friends and the
  scenes of his childhood might push the painful memories out of sight; and
  renew   his   interest   in   life。 So;   one   morning;   while   the   May   sun   shone
  with    a  soft  radiance    upon    the  beautiful    harbor;   our   Norseman      found
  himself standing on the deck of a huge black…hulled Cunarder; shivering in
  spite of the warmth; and feeling a chill loneliness creeping over him at the
  sight of the kissing and affectionate leave… takings which were going on all
  around him。       Olson was running back and forth; attending to his baggage;
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  but he himself took no thought; and felt no more responsibility than if he
  had    been    a  helpless   child。   He    half   regretted    that  his  own    wish   had
  prevailed; and was inclined to hold his friend responsible for it; and still he
  had not energy enough to protest now when the journey seemed inevitable。
  His heart still clung to the place which held the corpse of his ruined life; as
  a man may cling to the spot which hides his beloved dead。
  About     two   weeks     later  Halfdan     landed   in   Norway。     He     was   half
  reluctant to leave the steamer; and the land of his birth excited no emotion
  in his   breast。    He   was   but   conscious of   a   dim  regret   that   he   was   so  far
  away from Edith。         At last; however; he betook himself to a hotel; where
  he spent the afternoon sitting with half…closed eyes at a window; watching
  listlessly the drowsy slow…pulsed life which dribbled languidly through the
  narrow thoroughfare。          The noisy uproar of Broadway chimed remotely in
  his ears; like the distant roar of a tempest…tossed sea; and what had once
  been a perpetual annoyance was now a sweet memory。                       How often with
  Edith at his side had he threaded his way through the surging crowds that
  pour; on a fine afternoon; in an unceasing current up and down the street
  between      Union    and   Madison      Squares。    How      friendly;   and   sweet;   and
  gracious;   Edith   had   been   at   such   times;   how   fresh   her   voice;   how   witty
  and   animated   her   chance   remarks   when   they   stopped   to   greet   a   passing
  acquaintance;   and;   above   all;   how   inspiring       the   sight   of   her  heavenly
  beauty。 Now that was all past。          Perhaps he should never see Edith again。
  The next day he sauntered through the city; meeting some old friends;
  who   all   seemed   changed       and   singularly   uninteresting。      They   were      all
  engaged   or   married;   and   could   talk   of   nothing   but   matrimony;   and   their
  prospects      of  advancement       in  the   Government       service。     One     had   an
  influential uncle who had been a chum of the present minister of finance;
  another based his hopes of future prosperity upon the family connections
  of   his   betrothed;   and   a   third   was   waiting   with   a   patient   perseverance;
  worthy of a better cause; for the death or resignation of an antiquated chef…
  de…bureau; which; according to the promise of some mighty man; would
  open a position for him in the Department of Justice。                  All had the most
  absurd     theories    about    American       democracy;      and   indulged     freely    in
  prophecies of coming disasters; but about their own government they had
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  no opinion whatever。          If Halfdan attempted to set them right; they at once
  grew excited and declamatory; their opinions were based upon conviction
  and a charming ignorance of facts; and they were not to be moved。                      They
  knew  all   about Tweed   and   the Tammany  Ring;   and believed   them  to   be
  representative   citizens   of   New   York;   if   not   of   the   United   States;   but   of
  Charles Sumner and Carl Schurz they had never heard。                     Halfdan; who; in
  spite of his misfortunes in the land of his adoption; cherished a very tender
  feeling   for   it;   was   often   so   thoroughly   aroused   at   the   foolish   prejudices
  which everywhere met him; that his torpidity gradually thawed away; and
  he began to look more like his former self。
  Toward autumn he received an invitation to visit a country clergyman
  in the North; a distant relative of his father's; and there whiled away his
  time;   fishing   and   shooting;   until   winter   came。      But   as   Christmas   drew
  near;   and   the   day   wrestled   feebly   with   the   all…conquering   night;   the   old
  sorrow revived。        In the darkness which now brooded over land and sea;
  the thoughts needed no longer be on guard against themselves; they could
  roam far and wide as they listed。             Where was Edith now; the sweet; the
  wonderful Edith?         Was there yet the same dancing light in her beautiful
  eyes; the same golden sheen in her hair; the same merry ring in her voice?
  And had she not said that when he was content to be only her friend; he
  might   return   to   her;   and   she   would   receive   him   in   the   old   joyous   and
  confiding   way?       Surely   there   was   no   life   to   him   apart   from   her:   why
  should   he   not   be   her   friend?   Only   a   glimpse   of   her   lovely   faceah;   it
  was worth a lifetime; it would consecrate an age of misery; a glimpse of
  Edith's face。      Thus ran his fancies day by day; and the night only lent a
  deeper   intensity   to   the   yearnings   of   the   day。  He   walked   about   as   in   a
  dream;  seeing   nothing; heeding   nothing;  while  this one   strong   desireto
  see    Edith    once   more     throbbed     and   throbbed     with   a   slow;   feverish
  perseverance   within       him。    EdithEdith;   the   very   name   had   a   strange;
  potent     fascination。     Every     thought    whispered      〃Edith;〃his    pulse    beat
  〃Edith;〃and his heart repeated the beloved name。                 It was his pulse…beat;…
  …his heartbeat;his life…beat。
  And one morning as he stood   absently looking at his fingers   against
  the lightand they seemed strangely wan and transparentthe thought at
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  last took shape。       It rushed upon him with such vehemence; that he could
  no more resist it。       So he bade the clergyman good…bye; gathered his few
  worldly     goods     together   and    set  out  for   Bergen。     There     he  found    an
  English steamer which carried him to Hull; and a few weeks later; he was
  once more in New York。
  It was late one evening in January that a tug…boat arrived and took the
  cabin passengers ashore。          The moon sailed tranquilly over the deep blue
  dome   of   the   sky;   the   stars   traced   their   glittering   paths   of   light   from   the
  zenith downward; and it was sharp; bitter cold。               Northward over the river
  lay   a   great   bank   of   cloud;   dense;   gray   and   massive;   the   spectre   of   the
  coming      snow…storm。       There     it  lay  so   huge    and   f