第 105 节
作者:套牢      更新:2021-02-20 15:34      字数:9321
  drill yet; and a good many of the officers too not out of the
  awkward squad。  I am sure I; for a private; am not。  In the drill a
  man has to conquer himself; and move with the rest by individual
  attention to his own duty: to what mighty battlefields the recruit
  may yet be led; he does not know。  Meantime he has nearly enough to
  do with his goose…step; while there is plenty of single combat;
  skirmish; and light cavalry work generally; to get him ready for
  whatever is to follow。  I beg your pardon: I am preaching。'
  'Eloquently;' I answered。
  Of some of the places into which Falconer led me that night I will
  attempt no descriptionplaces blazing with lights and mirrors;
  crowded with dancers; billowing with music; close and hot; and full
  of the saddest of all sights; the uninteresting faces of commonplace
  women。
  'There is a passion;' I said; as we came out of one of these
  dreadful places; 'that lingers about the heart like the odour of
  violets; like a glimmering twilight on the borders of moonrise; and
  there is a passion that wraps itself in the vapours of patchouli and
  coffins; and streams from the eyes like gaslight from a tavern。  And
  yet the line is ill to draw between them。  It is very dreadful。
  These are women。'
  'They are in God's hands;' answered Falconer。 'He hasn't done with
  them yet。  Shall it take less time to make a woman than to make a
  world?  Is not the woman the greater?  She may have her ages of
  chaos; her centuries of crawling slime; yet rise a woman at last。'
  'How much alike all those women were!'
  'A family likeness; alas! which always strikes you first。'
  'Some of them looked quite modest。'
  'There are great differences。  I do not know anything more touching
  than to see how a woman will sometimes wrap around her the last
  remnants of a soiled and ragged modesty。  It has moved me almost to
  tears to see such a one hanging her head in shame during the singing
  of a detestable song。  That poor thing's shame was precious in the
  eyes of the Master; surely。'
  'Could nothing be done for her?'
  'I contrived to let her know where she would find a friend if she
  wanted to be good: that is all you can do in such cases。  If the
  horrors of their life do not drive them out at such an open door;
  you can do nothing else; I fearfor the time。'
  'Where are you going now; may I ask?'
  'Into the cityon business;' he added with a smile。
  'There will be nobody there so late。'
  'Nobody!  One would think you were the beadle of a city church; Mr。
  Gordon。'
  We came into a very narrow; dirty street。  I do not know where it
  is。  A slatternly woman advanced from an open door; and said;
  'Mr。 Falconer。'
  He looked at her for a moment。
  'Why; Sarah; have you come to this already?' he said。
  'Never mind me; sir。  It's no more than you told me to expect。  You
  knowed him better than I did。  Leastways I'm an honest woman。'
  'Stick to that; Sarah; and be good…tempered。'
  'I'll have a try anyhow; sir。  But there's a poor cretur a dyin'
  up…stairs; and I'm afeard it'll go hard with her; for she throwed a
  Bible out o' window this very morning; sir。'
  'Would she like to see me?  I'm afraid not。'
  'She's got Lilywhite; what's a sort of a reader; readin' that same
  Bible to her now。'
  'There can be no great harm in just looking in;' he said; turning to
  me。
  'I shall be happy to follow youanywhere;' I returned。
  'She's awful ill; sir; cholerer or summat;' said Sarah; as she led
  the way up the creaking stair。
  We half entered the room softly。  Two or three women sat by the
  chimney; and another by a low bed; covered with a torn patchwork
  counterpane; spelling out a chapter in the Bible。  We paused for a
  moment to hear what she was reading。  Had the book been opened by
  chance; or by design?  It was the story of David and Bathsheba。
  Moans came from the bed; but the candle in a bottle; by which the
  woman was reading; was so placed that we could not see the sufferer。
  We stood still and did not interrupt the reading。
  'Ha! ha! ha!' laughed a coarse voice from the side of the chimney:
  'the saint; you see; was no better than some of the rest of us!'
  'I think he was a good deal worse just then;' said Falconer;
  stepping forward。
  'Gracious! there's Mr。 Falconer;' said another woman; rising; and
  speaking in a flattering tone。
  'Then;' remarked the former speaker; 'there's a chance for old Moll
  and me yet。  King David was a saint; wasn't he?  Ha! ha!'
  'Yes; and you might be one too; if you were as sorry for your faults
  as he was for his。'
  'Sorry; indeed!  I'll be damned if I be sorry。  What have I to be
  sorry for?  Where's the harm in turning an honest penny?  I ha' took
  no man's wife; nor murdered himself neither。  There's yer saints!
  He was a rum 'un。  Ha! ha!'
  Falconer approached her; bent down and whispered something no one
  could hear but herself。  She gave a smothered cry; and was silent。
  'Give me the book;' he said; turning towards the bed。 'I'll read you
  something better than that。  I'll read about some one that never did
  anything wrong。'
  'I don't believe there never was no sich a man;' said the previous
  reader; as she handed him the book; grudgingly。
  'Not Jesus Christ himself?' said Falconer。
  'Oh!  I didn't know as you meant him。'
  'Of course I meant him。  There never was another。'
  'I have heard tellp'raps it was yourself; siras how he didn't
  come down upon us over hard after all; bless him!'
  Falconer sat down on the side of the bed; and read the story of
  Simon the Pharisee and the woman that was a sinner。  When he ceased;
  the silence that followed was broken by a sob from somewhere in the
  room。  The sick woman stopped her moaning; and said;
  'Turn down the leaf there; please; sir。  Lilywhite will read it to
  me when you're gone。'
  The some one sobbed again。  It was a young slender girl; with a face
  disfigured by the small…pox; and; save for the tearful look it wore;
  poor and expressionless。  Falconer said something gentle to her。
  'Will he ever come again?' she sobbed。
  'Who?' asked Falconer。
  'HimJesus Christ。  I've heard tell; I think; that he was to come
  again some day。'
  'Why do you ask?'
  'Because' she said; with a fresh burst of tears; which rendered
  the words that followed unintelligible。  But she recovered herself
  in a few moments; and; as if finishing her sentence; put her hand up
  to her poor; thin; colourless hair; and said;
  'My hair ain't long enough to wipe his feet。'
  'Do you know what he would say to you; my girl?'  Falconer asked。
  'No。 What would he say to me?  He would speak to me; would he?'
  'He would say: Thy sins are forgiven thee。'
  'Would he; though?  Would he?' she cried; starting up。 'Take me to
  himtake me to him。  Oh!  I forgot。  He's dead。  But he will come
  again; won't he?  He was crucified four times; you know; and he must
  ha' come four times for that。  Would they crucify him again; sir?'
  'No; they wouldn't crucify him nowin England at least。  They would
  only laugh at him; shake their heads at what he told them; as much
  as to say it wasn't true; and sneer and mock at him in some of the
  newspapers。'
  'Oh dear!  I've been very wicked。'
  'But you won't be so any more。'
  'No; no; no。  I won't; I won't; I won't。'
  She talked hurriedly; almost wildly。  The coarse old woman tapped
  her forehead with her finger。  Falconer took the girl's hand。
  'What is your name?' he said。
  'Nell。'
  'What more?'
  'Nothing more。'
  'Well; Nelly;' said Falconer。
  'How kind of you to call me Nelly!' interrupted the poor girl。 'They
  always calls me Nell; just。'
  'Nelly;' repeated Falconer; 'I will send a lady here to…morrow to
  take you away with her; if you like; and tell you how you must do to
  find Jesus。People always find him that want to find him。'
  The elderly woman with the rough voice; who had not spoken since he
  whispered to her; now interposed with a kind of cowed fierceness。
  'Don't go putting humbug into my child's head now; Mr。
  Falconer'ticing her away from her home。  Everybody knows my Nell's
  been an idiot since ever she was born。  Poor child!'
  'I ain't your child;' cried the girl; passionately。 'I ain't
  nobody's child。'
  'You are God's child;' said Falconer; who stood looking on with his
  eyes shining; but otherwise in a state of absolute composure。
  'Am I?  Am I?  You won't forget to send for me; sir?'
  'That I won't;' he answered。
  She turned instantly towards the woman; and snapped her fingers in
  her face。
  'I don't care that for you;' she cried。 'You dare to touch me now;
  and I'll bite you。'
  'Come; come; Nelly; you mustn't be rude;' said Falconer。
  'No; sir; I won't no more; leastways to nobody but she。  It's she
  makes me do all the wicked things; it