第 47 节
作者:
旅游巴士 更新:2021-02-20 14:19 字数:9321
straightforwardness of character that was stamped upon his face; a
love of humour; and a temper which was more easily appeased than
ruffled made up for some awkwardness and want of savoir faire。 He
soon became a not unpopular member of the best set of his year; and
though neither capable of becoming; nor aspiring to become; a
leader; was admitted by the leaders as among their nearer hangers…
on。
Of ambition he had at that time not one particle; greatness; or
indeed superiority of any kind; seemed so far off and
incomprehensible to him that the idea of connecting it with himself
never crossed his mind。 If he could escape the notice of all those
with whom he did not feel himself en rapport; he conceived that he
had triumphed sufficiently。 He did not care about taking a good
degree; except that it must be good enough to keep his father and
mother quiet。 He did not dream of being able to get a fellowship;
if he had; he would have tried hard to do so; for he became so fond
of Cambridge that he could not bear the thought of having to leave
it; the briefness indeed of the season during which his present
happiness was to last was almost the only thing that now seriously
troubled him。
Having less to attend to in the matter of growing; and having got
his head more free; he took to reading fairly wellnot because he
liked it; but because he was told he ought to do so; and his natural
instinct; like that of all very young men who are good for anything;
was to do as those in authority told him。 The intention at
Battersby was (for Dr Skinner had said that Ernest could never get a
fellowship) that he should take a sufficiently good degree to be
able to get a tutorship or mastership in some school preparatory to
taking orders。 When he was twenty…one years old his money was to
come into his own hands; and the best thing he could do with it
would be to buy the next presentation to a living; the rector of
which was now old; and live on his mastership or tutorship till the
living fell in。 He could buy a very good living for the sum which
his grandfather's legacy now amounted to; for Theobald had never had
any serious intention of making deductions for his son's maintenance
and education; and the money had accumulated till it was now about
five thousand pounds; he had only talked about making deductions in
order to stimulate the boy to exertion as far as possible; by making
him think that this was his only chance of escaping starvationor
perhaps from pure love of teasing。
When Ernest had a living of 600 pounds or 700 pounds a year with a
house; and not too many parishionerswhy; he might add to his
income by taking pupils; or even keeping a school; and then; say at
thirty; he might marry。 It was not easy for Theobald to hit on any
much more sensible plan。 He could not get Ernest into business; for
he had no business connectionsbesides he did not know what
business meant; he had no interest; again; at the Bar; medicine was
a profession which subjected its students to ordeals and temptations
which these fond parents shrank from on behalf of their boy; he
would be thrown among companions and familiarised with details which
might sully him; and though he might stand; it was 〃only too
possible〃 that he would fall。 Besides; ordination was the road
which Theobald knew and understood; and indeed the only road about
which he knew anything at all; so not unnaturally it was the one he
chose for Ernest。
The foregoing had been instilled into my hero from earliest boyhood;
much as it had been instilled into Theobald himself; and with the
same resultthe conviction; namely; that he was certainly to be a
clergyman; but that it was a long way off yet; and he supposed it
was all right。 As for the duty of reading hard; and taking as good
a degree as he could; this was plain enough; so he set himself to
work; as I have said; steadily; and to the surprise of everyone as
well as himself got a college scholarship; of no great value; but
still a scholarship; in his freshman's term。 It is hardly necessary
to say that Theobald stuck to the whole of this money; believing the
pocket…money he allowed Ernest to be sufficient for him; and knowing
how dangerous it was for young men to have money at command。 I do
not suppose it even occurred to him to try and remember what he had
felt when his father took a like course in regard to himself。
Ernest's position in this respect was much what it had been at
school except that things were on a larger scale。 His tutor's and
cook's bills were paid for him; his father sent him his wine; over
and above this he had 50 pounds a year with which to keep himself in
clothes and all other expenses; this was about the usual thing at
Emmanuel in Ernest's day; though many had much less than this。
Ernest did as he had done at schoolhe spent what he could; soon
after he received his money; he then incurred a few modest
liabilities; and then lived penuriously till next term; when he
would immediately pay his debts; and start new ones to much the same
extent as those which he had just got rid of。 When he came into his
5000 pounds and became independent of his father; 15 pounds or 20
pounds served to cover the whole of his unauthorised expenditure。
He joined the boat club; and was constant in his attendance at the
boats。 He still smoked; but never took more wine or beer than was
good for him; except perhaps on the occasion of a boating supper;
but even then he found the consequences unpleasant; and soon learned
how to keep within safe limits。 He attended chapel as often as he
was compelled to do so; he communicated two or three times a year;
because his tutor told him he ought to; in fact he set himself to
live soberly and cleanly; as I imagine all his instincts prompted
him to do; and when he fellas who that is born of woman can help
sometimes doing?it was not till after a sharp tussle with a
temptation that was more than his flesh and blood could stand; then
he was very penitent and would go a fairly long while without
sinning again; and this was how it had always been with him since he
had arrived at years of indiscretion。
Even to the end of his career at Cambridge he was not aware that he
had it in him to do anything; but others had begun to see that he
was not wanting in ability and sometimes told him so。 He did not
believe it; indeed he knew very well that if they thought him clever
they were being taken in; but it pleased him to have been able to
take them in; and he tried to do so still further; he was therefore
a good deal on the look…out for cants that he could catch and apply
in season; and might have done himself some mischief thus if he had
not been ready to throw over any cant as soon as he had come across
another more nearly to his fancy; his friends used to say that when
he rose he flew like a snipe; darting several times in various
directions before he settled down to a steady straight flight; but
when he had once got into this he would keep to it。
CHAPTER XLVI
When he was in his third year a magazine was founded at Cambridge;
the contributions to which were exclusively by undergraduates。
Ernest sent in an essay upon the Greek Drama; which he has declined
to let me reproduce here without his being allowed to re…edit it。 I
have therefore been unable to give it in its original form; but when
pruned of its redundancies (and this is all that has been done to
it) it runs as follows …
〃I shall not attempt within the limits at my disposal to make a
resume of the rise and progress of the Greek drama; but will confine
myself to considering whether the reputation enjoyed by the three
chief Greek tragedians; AEschylus; Sophocles and Euripides; is one
that will be permanent; or whether they will one day be held to have
been overrated。
〃Why; I ask myself; do I see much that I can easily admire in Homer;
Thucydides; Herodotus; Demosthenes; Aristophanes; Theocritus; parts
of Lucretius; Horace's satires and epistles; to say nothing of other
ancient writers; and yet find myself at once repelled by even those
works of AEschylus; Sophocles and Euripides which are most generally
admired。
〃With the first…named writers I am in the hands of men who feel; if
not as I do; still as I can understand their feeling; and as I am
interested to see that they should have felt; with the second I have
so little sympathy that I cannot understand how anyone can ever have
taken any interest in them whatever。 Their highest flights to me
are dull; pompous and artificial productions; which; if they were to
appear now for the first time; would; I should think; either fall
dead or be severely handled by the critics。 I wish to know whether
it is I who am in fault in this matter; or whether part of the blame
may not rest with the tragedians themselves。
〃How far I wonder did the Athenians genuinely like these poets; and
how far was the applause which was lavished upon them due to fashion
or affectation? How far; in fact; did admiration for the orthodox
tragedians take that place among the Athenians which going to church
does among ourselves?
〃This is a venturesome question considering the verdict