第 45 节
作者:
旅游巴士 更新:2021-02-20 14:19 字数:9321
fury with which Dr Skinner was pursuing him tended to bring about a
reaction in his favour; as though he had been more sinned against
than sinning。
As the half year wore on his spirits gradually revived; and when
attacked by one of his fits of self…abasement he was in some degree
consoled by having found out that even his father and mother; whom
he had supposed so immaculate; were no better than they should be。
About the fifth of November it was a school custom to meet on a
certain common not far from Roughborough and burn somebody in
effigy; this being the compromise arrived at in the matter of
fireworks and Guy Fawkes festivities。 This year it was decided that
Pontifex's governor should be the victim; and Ernest though a good
deal exercised in mind as to what he ought to do; in the end saw no
sufficient reason for holding aloof from proceedings which; as he
justly remarked; could not do his father any harm。
It so happened that the bishop had held a confirmation at the school
on the fifth of November。 Dr Skinner had not quite liked the
selection of this day; but the bishop was pressed by many
engagements; and had been compelled to make the arrangement as it
then stood。 Ernest was among those who had to be confirmed; and was
deeply impressed with the solemn importance of the ceremony。 When
he felt the huge old bishop drawing down upon him as he knelt in
chapel he could hardly breathe; and when the apparition paused
before him and laid its hands upon his head he was frightened almost
out of his wits。 He felt that he had arrived at one of the great
turning points of his life; and that the Ernest of the future could
resemble only very faintly the Ernest of the past。
This happened at about noon; but by the one o'clock dinner…hour the
effect of the confirmation had worn off; and he saw no reason why he
should forego his annual amusement with the bonfire; so he went with
the others and was very valiant till the image was actually produced
and was about to be burnt; then he felt a little frightened。 It was
a poor thing enough; made of paper; calico and straw; but they had
christened it The Rev。 Theobald Pontifex; and he had a revulsion of
feeling as he saw it being carried towards the bonfire。 Still he
held his ground; and in a few minutes when all was over felt none
the worse for having assisted at a ceremony which; after all; was
prompted by a boyish love of mischief rather than by rancour。
I should say that Ernest had written to his father; and told him of
the unprecedented way in which he was being treated; he even
ventured to suggest that Theobald should interfere for his
protection and reminded him how the story had been got out of him;
but Theobald had had enough of Dr Skinner for the present; the
burning of the school list had been a rebuff which did not encourage
him to meddle a second time in the internal economics of
Roughborough。 He therefore replied that he must either remove
Ernest from Roughborough altogether; which would for many reasons be
undesirable; or trust to the discretion of the head master as
regards the treatment he might think best for any of his pupils。
Ernest said no more; he still felt that it was so discreditable to
him to have allowed any confession to be wrung from him; that he
could not press the promised amnesty for himself。
It was during the 〃Mother Cross row;〃 as it was long styled among
the boys; that a remarkable phenomenon was witnessed at
Roughborough。 I mean that of the head boys under certain conditions
doing errands for their juniors。 The head boys had no bounds and
could go to Mrs Cross's whenever they liked; they actually;
therefore; made themselves go…betweens; and would get anything from
either Mrs Cross's or Mrs Jones's for any boy; no matter how low in
the school; between the hours of a quarter to nine and nine in the
morning; and a quarter to six and six in the afternoon。 By degrees;
however; the boys grew bolder; and the shops; though not openly
declared in bounds again; were tacitly allowed to be so。
CHAPTER XLIV
I may spare the reader more details about my hero's school days。 He
rose; always in spite of himself; into the Doctor's form; and for
the last two years or so of his time was among the praepostors;
though he never rose into the upper half of them。 He did little;
and I think the Doctor rather gave him up as a boy whom he had
better leave to himself; for he rarely made him construe; and he
used to send in his exercises or not; pretty much as he liked。 His
tacit; unconscious obstinacy had in time effected more even than a
few bold sallies in the first instance would have done。 To the end
of his career his position inter pares was what it had been at the
beginning; namely; among the upper part of the less reputable class…
…whether of seniors or juniorsrather than among the lower part of
the more respectable。
Only once in the whole course of his school life did he get praise
from Dr Skinner for any exercise; and this he has treasured as the
best example of guarded approval which he has ever seen。 He had had
to write a copy of Alcaics on 〃The dogs of the monks of St Bernard;〃
and when the exercise was returned to him he found the Doctor had
written on it: 〃In this copy of Alcaicswhich is still excessively
badI fancy that I can discern some faint symptoms of improvement。〃
Ernest says that if the exercise was any better than usual it must
have been by a fluke; for he is sure that he always liked dogs;
especially St Bernard dogs; far too much to take any pleasure in
writing Alcaics about them。
〃As I look back upon it;〃 he said to me but the other day; with a
hearty laugh; 〃I respect myself more for having never once got the
best mark for an exercise than I should do if I had got it every
time it could be got。 I am glad nothing could make me do Latin and
Greek verses; I am glad Skinner could never get any moral influence
over me; I am glad I was idle at school; and I am glad my father
overtasked me as a boyotherwise; likely enough I should have
acquiesced in the swindle; and might have written as good a copy of
Alcaics about the dogs of the monks of St Bernard as my neighbours;
and yet I don't know; for I remember there was another boy; who sent
in a Latin copy of some sort; but for his own pleasure he wrote the
following …
The dogs of the monks of St Bernard go
To pick little children out of the snow;
And around their necks is the cordial gin
Tied with a little bit of bob…bin。
I should like to have written that; and I did try; but I couldn't。
I didn't quite like the last line; and tried to mend it; but I
couldn't。〃
I fancied I could see traces of bitterness against the instructors
of his youth in Ernest's manner; and said something to this effect。
〃Oh; no;〃 he replied; still laughing; 〃no more than St Anthony felt
towards the devils who had tempted him; when he met some of them
casually a hundred or a couple of hundred years afterwards。 Of
course he knew they were devils; but that was all right enough;
there must be devils。 St Anthony probably liked these devils better
than most others; and for old acquaintance sake showed them as much
indulgence as was compatible with decorum。
〃Besides; you know;〃 he added; 〃St Anthony tempted the devils quite
as much as they tempted him; for his peculiar sanctity was a greater
temptation to tempt him than they could stand。 Strictly speaking;
it was the devils who were the more to be pitied; for they were led
up by St Anthony to be tempted and fell; whereas St Anthony did not
fall。 I believe I was a disagreeable and unintelligible boy; and if
ever I meet Skinner there is no one whom I would shake hands with;
or do a good turn to more readily。〃
At home things went on rather better; the Ellen and Mother Cross
rows sank slowly down upon the horizon; and even at home he had
quieter times now that he had become a praepostor。 Nevertheless the
watchful eye and protecting hand were still ever over him to guard
his comings in and his goings out; and to spy out all his ways。 Is
it wonderful that the boy; though always trying to keep up
appearances as though he were cheerful and contentedand at times
actually being sowore often an anxious; jaded look when he thought
none were looking; which told of an almost incessant conflict
within?
Doubtless Theobald saw these looks and knew how to interpret them;
but it was his profession to know how to shut his eyes to things
that were inconvenientno clergyman could keep his benefice for a
month if he could not do this; besides he had allowed himself for so
many years to say things he ought not to have said; and not to say
the things he ought to have said; that he was little likely to see
anything that he thought it more convenient not to see unless he was
made to do so。
It was not much that was wanted。 To make no mysteries where Nature
has made none; to bring his conscience under something like
reasonable control; to give Ernest his head a little more; to ask
fewer questions; and to give him pocket money with a desire that it
should be spent upon menus plaisirs 。 。 。
〃Call that not much indeed;〃 laughed Ernest; as