An　Unsocial　Socialist
  by　George　Bernard　Shaw
  CHAPTER　I
  In　the　dusk　of　an　October　evening；　a　sensible　looking　woman　of
  forty　came　out　through　an　oaken　door　to　a　broad　landing　on　the
  first　floor　of　an　old　English　country…house。　A　braid　of　her　hair
  had　fallen　forward　as　if　she　had　been　stooping　over　book　or　pen；
  and　she　stood　for　a　moment　to　smooth　it；　and　to　gaze
  contemplativelynot　in　the　least　sentimentallythrough　the
  tall；
  narrow　window。　The　sun　was　setting；　but　its　glories　were　at　the
  other　side　of　the　house；　for　this　window　looked　eastward；　where
  the　landscape　of　sheepwalks　and　pasture　land　was　sobering　at　the
  approach　of　darkness。
  The　lady；　like　one　to　whom　silence　and　quiet　were　luxuries；
  lingered　on　the　landing　for　some　time。　Then　she　turned　towards
  another　door；　on　which　was　inscribed；　in　white　letters；　Class
  Room　No。　6。　Arrested　by　a　whispering　above；　she　paused　in　the
  doorway；　and　looked　up　the　stairs　along　a　broad　smooth　handrail
  that　swept　round　in　an　unbroken　curve　at　each　landing；　forming　an
  inclined　plane　from　the　top　to　the　bottom　of　the　house。
  A　young　voice；　apparently　mimicking　someone；　now　came　from　above；
  saying；
  〃We　will　take　the　Etudes　de　la　Velocite　next；　if　you　please；
  ladies。〃
  Immediately　a　girl　in　a　holland　dress　shot　down　through　space；
  whirled　round　the　curve　with　a　fearless　centrifugal　toss　of　her
  ankle；　and　vanished　into　the　darkness　beneath。　She　was　followed
  by　a　stately　girl　in　green；　intently　holding　her　breath　as　she
  flew；　and　also　by　a　large　young　woman　in　black；　with　her　lower
  lip　grasped　between　her　teeth；　and　her　fine　brown　eyes　protruding
  with　excitement。　Her　passage　created　a　miniature　tempest　which
  disarranged　anew　the　hair　of　the　lady　on　the　landing；　who　waited
  in　breathless　alarm　until　two　light　shocks　and　a　thump　announced
  that　the　aerial　voyagers　had　landed　safely　in　the　hall。
  〃Oh　law！〃　exclaimed　the　voice　that　had　spoken　before。　〃Here's
  Susan。〃
  〃It's　a　mercy　your　neck　ain't　broken；〃　replied　some　palpitating
  female。　〃I'll　tell　of　you　this　time；　Miss　Wylie；　indeed　I　will。
  And　you；　too；　Miss　Carpenter：　I　wonder　at　you　not　to　have　more
  sense　at　your　age　and　with　your　size！　Miss　Wilson　can't　help
  hearing　when　you　come　down　with　a　thump　like　that。　You　shake　the
  whole　house。〃
  Oh　bother！〃　said　Miss　Wylie。　〃The　Lady　Abbess　takes　good　care　to
  shut　out　all　the　noise　we　make。　Let　us〃
  〃Girls；〃　said　the　lady　above；　calling　down　quietly；　but　with
  ominous　distinctness。
  Silence　and　utter　confusion　ensued。　Then　came　a　reply；　in　a　tone
  of　honeyed　sweetness；　from　Miss　Wylie：
  〃Did　you　call　us；　DEAR　Miss　Wilson？〃
  〃Yes。　Come　up　here；　if　you　please；　all　three。〃
  There　was　some　hesitation　among　them；　each　offering　the　other
  precedence。　At　last　they　went　up　slowly；　in　the　order；　though　not
  at　all　in　the　manner；　of　their　flying　descent；　followed　Miss
  Wilson　into　the　class…room；　and　stood　in　a　row　before　her；
  illumined　through　three　western　windows　with　a　glow　of　ruddy
  orange　light。　Miss　Carpenter；　the　largest　of　the　three；　was　red
  and　confused。　Her　arms　hung　by　her　sides；　her　fingers　twisting
  the　folds　of　her　dress。　Miss　Gertrude　Lindsay；　in　pale　sea…green；
  had　a　small　head；　delicate　complexion；　and　pearly　teeth。　She
  stood　erect；　with　an　expression　of　cold　distaste　for　reproof　of
  any　sort。　The　holland　dress　of　the　third　offender　had　changed
  from　yellow　to　white　as　she　passed　from　the　gray　eastern　twilight
  on　the　staircase　into　the　warm　western　glow　in　the　room。　Her　face
  had　a　bright　olive　tone；　and　seemed　to　have　a　golden　mica　in　its
  composition。　Her　eyes　and　hair　were　hazel…nut　color；　and　her
  teeth；　the　upper　row　of　which　she　displayed　freely；　were　like
  fine　Portland　stone；　and　sloped　outward　enough　to　have　spoilt　her
  mouth；　had　they　not　been　supported　by　a　rich　under　lip；　and　a
  finely　curved；　impudent　chin。　Her　half　cajoling；　half　mocking
  air；　and　her　ready　smile；　were　difficult　to　confront　with
  severity；　and　Miss　Wilson　knew　it；　for　she　would　not　look　at　her
  even　when　attracted　by　a　convulsive　start　and　an　angry　side
  glance　from　Miss　Lindsay；　who　had　just　been　indented　between　the
  ribs　by　a　finger　tip。
  〃You　are　aware　that　you　have　broken　the　rules；〃　said　Miss　Wilson
  quietly。
  〃We　didn't　intend　to。　We　really　did　not；〃　said　the　girl　in
  holland；　coaxingly。
  〃Pray　what　was　your　intention　then；　Miss　Wylie？〃
  Miss　Wylie　unexpectedly　treated　this　as　a　smart　repartee　instead
  of　a　rebuke。　She　sent　up　a　strange　little　scream；　which　exploded
  in　a　cascade　of　laughter。
  〃Pray　be　silent；　Agatha；〃　said　Miss　Wilson　severely。　Agatha
  looked　contrite。　Miss　Wilson　turned　hastily　to　the　eldest　of　the
  three；　and　continued：
  〃I　am　especially　surprised　at　you；　Miss　Carpenter。　Since　you　have
  no　desire　to　keep　faith　with　me　by　upholding　the　rules；　of　which
  you　are　quite　old　enough　to　understand　the　necessity；　I　shall　not
  trouble　you　with　reproaches；　or　appeals　to　which　I　am　now
  convinced　that　you　would　not　respond；〃　（here　Miss　Carpenter；　with
  an　inarticulate　protest；　burst　into　tears）；　〃but　you　should　at
  least　think　of　the　danger　into　which　your　juniors　are　led　by　your
  childishness。　How　should　you　feel　if　Agatha　had　broken　her　neck？〃
  〃Oh！〃　exclaimed　Agatha；　putting　her　hand　quickly　to　her　neck。
  〃I　didn't　think　there　was　any　danger；〃　said　Miss　Carpenter；
  struggling　with　her　tears。　〃　Agatha　has　done　it　so　oftoh　dear！
  you　have　torn　me。〃　　Miss　Wylie　had　pulled　at　her　schoolfellow's
  skirt；　and　pulled　too　hard。
  〃Miss　Wylie；〃　said　Miss　Wilson；　flushing　slightly；　〃I　must　ask
  you　to　leave　the　room。〃
  〃Oh；　no；〃　exclaimed　Agatha；　clasping　her　hands　in　distress。
  〃Please　don't；　dear　Miss　Wilson。　I　am　so　sorry。　I　beg　your
  pardon。〃
  〃Since　you　will　not　do　what　I　ask；　I　must　go　myself；〃　said　Miss
  Wilson　sternly。　〃Come　with　me　to　my　study；〃　she　added　to　the　two
  other　girls。　〃If　you　attempt　to　follow；　Miss　Wylie；　I　shall
  regard　it　as　an　intrusion。〃
  〃But　I　will　go　away　if　you　wish　it。　I　didn't　mean　to　diso〃
  〃I　shall　not　trouble　you　now。　Come；　girls。〃
  The　three　went　out；　and　Miss　Wylie；　left　behind　in　disgrace；　made
  a　surpassing　grimace　at　Miss　Lindsay；　who　glanced　back　at　her。
  When　she　was　alone；　her　vivacity　subsided。　She　went　slowly　to　the
  window；　and　gazed　disparagingly　at　the　landscape。　Once；　when　a
  sound　of　voices　above　reached　her；　her　eyes　brightened；　and　her
  ready　lip　moved；　but　the　next　silent　moment　she　relapsed　into
  moody　indifference；　which　was　not　relieved　until　her　two
  companions；　looking　very　serious；　re…entered。
  〃Well；〃　she　said　gaily；　〃has　moral　force　been　applied？　Are　you
  going　to　the　Recording　Angel？〃
  〃Hush；　Agatha；〃　said　Miss　Carpenter。　〃You　ought　to　be　ashamed　of
  yourself。〃
  〃No；　but　you　ought；　you　goose。　A　nice　row　you　have　got　me　into！〃
  〃It　was　your　own　fault。　You　tore　my　dress。〃
  〃Yes；　when　you　were　blurting　out　that　I　sometimes　slide　down　the
  banisters。〃
  〃Oh！〃　said　Miss　Carpenter　slowly；　as　if　this　reason　had　not
  occurred　to　her　before。　〃Was　that　why　you　pulled　me？〃
  〃Dear　me！　It　has　actually　dawned　upon　you。　You　are　a　most　awfully
  silly　girl；　Jane。　What　did　the　Lady　Abbess　say？〃
  Miss　Carpenter　again　gave　her　tears　way；　and　could　not　reply。
  〃She　is　disgusted　with　us；　and　no　wonder；〃　said　Miss　Lindsay。
  〃She　said　it　was　all　your　fault；〃　sobbed　Miss　Carpenter。
  〃Well；　never　mind；　dear；〃　said　Agatha　soothingly。　〃Put　it　in　the
  Recording　Angel。〃
  〃I　won't　write　a　word　in　the　Recording　Angel　unless　you　do　so
  first；〃　said　Miss　Lindsay　angrily。　〃You　are　more　in　fault　than　we
  are。〃
  〃Certainly；　my　dear；〃　replied　Agatha。　〃A　whole　page；　if　you
  wish。〃
  〃I　b…believe　you　LIKE　writing　in　the　Recording　Angel；〃　said　Miss
  Carpenter　spitefully。
  〃Yes；　Jane。　It　is　the　best　fun　the　place　affords。〃
  〃It　may　be　fun　to　you；〃　said　Miss　Lindsay　sharply；　〃but　it　is　not
  very　creditable　to　me；　as　Miss　Wilson　said　just　now；　to　take　a
  prize　in　moral　science　and　then　have　to　write　down　that　I　don't
  know　how　to　behave　myself。　Besides；　I　do　not　like　to　be　told　that
  I　am　ill…bred！〃
  Agatha　laughed。　〃What　a　deep　old　thing　she　is！　She　knows　all　our
  weaknesses；　and　stabs　at　us　through　them。　Catch　her　telling　me；
  or　Jane　there；　that　we　are　ill…bred！〃
  〃I　don't　understand　you；〃　said　Miss　Lindsay；　haughtily。
  〃Of　course　not。　That's　because　you　don't　know　as　much　moral
  science　as　I；　though　I　never　took　a　prize　in　it。〃
  〃You　never　took　a　prize　in　anything；〃　said　Miss　Carpenter。
  〃And　I　hope　I　never　shall；〃　said　Agatha。　〃I　would　as　soon
  scramble　for　hot　pennies　in　the　snow；　like　the　street　boys；　as
  scramble　to　see　who　can　answer　most　questions。　Dr。　Watts　is
  enough　moral　science　for　me。　Now　for　the　Recording　Angel。〃
  She　went　to　a　shelf　and　took　down　a　heavy　quarto；　bound　in　black
  leather；　and　inscribed；　in　red　letters；　MY　FAULTS。　This　she　threw
  irreverently　on　a　desk；　and　tossed　its　pages　over　until　she　came
  to　one　only　partly　covered　with　manuscript　confessions。
  〃For　a　wonder；〃　she　said；　〃here　are　two　entries　that　are　not
  mine。　Sarah　Gerram！　What　has　she　been　confessing？〃
  〃Don't　read　it；〃　said　Miss　Lindsay　quickly。　〃You　know　that　it　is
  the　most　dishonorable　thing　any　of　us　can　do。〃
  〃Poch！　Our　little　sins　are　not　worth　ma