第 46 节
作者:南方网      更新:2021-02-19 19:55      字数:9289
  finally  settled?  Is   it  impossible   to   —?   But   I   have   no   right;   and   I
  could have no chance of succeeding。 Excuse me; Miss Dashwood。 I
  believe I have been wrong in saying  so much; but  I   hardly  know
  what      to   do;   and    on    your    prudence       I  have    the    strongest
  dependence。 Tell me that it is all absolutely resolved on; that any
  attempt; that in short concealment; if concealment be possible; is
  all that remains。”
  These   words;   which  conveyed   to  Elinor   a   direct   avowal   of   his
  love     for  her    sister;   affected    her    very    much。     She    was     not
  immediately able to say anything; and even when her spirits were
  recovered; she debated for a short time; on the answer it would be
  most proper to give。 The real state of things between Willoughby
  and her sister was so little known to herself; that in endeavouring
  to explain   it; she   might  be  as liable   to  say  too  much  as   too  little。
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  Yet     as    she    was     convinced       that    Marianne’s        affection     for
  Willoughby;   could   leave   no   hope   of   Colonel   Brandon’s   success;
  whatever   the   event   of   that   affection   might   be;   and   at   the   same
  time   wished   to   shield   her   conduct   from   censure;   she   thought   it
  most prudent and kind; after some consideration; to say more than
  she   really   knew   or   believed。   She   acknowledged;   therefore;   that
  though she had never been informed by  themselves   of   the   terms
  on which they stood with each other; of their mutual affection she
  had no doubt; and of their correspondence she was not astonished
  to hear。
  He listened to her  with  silent  attention;   and  on   her  ceasing  to
  speak;   rose   directly   from   his   seat;   and   after   saying   in   a   voice   of
  emotion;       “to  your    sister   I  wish    all   imaginable      happiness;      to
  Willoughby  that  he  may  endeavour   to   deserve   her;”—took   leave;
  and went away。
  Elinor  derived no  comfortable   feelings   from   this   conversation;
  to lessen the uneasiness of her mind on other points; she was left;
  on     the   contrary;     with     a   melancholy       impression       of   Colonel
  Brandon’s unhappiness; and was prevented even from wishing  it
  removed; by her anxiety for the very event that must confirm it。
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  CHAPTER VI
  othing   occurred   during   the   next   three   or   four   days;   to
  make   Elinor   regret   what   she   had   done;   in   applying   to
  N
  her    mother;     for  Willoughby      neither    came    nor   wrote。
  They   were   engaged   about   the   end   of   that   time   to   attend   Lady
  Middleton to a party; from which Mrs。 Jennings was kept away by
  the   indisposition     of  her   youngest    daughter;     and   for  this   party;
  Marianne;       wholly    dispirited;    careless   of   her   appearance;      and
  seeming equally indifferent whether she went or  staid;   prepared;
  without one look of hope or one expression of pleasure。 She sat by
  the    drawing…room        fire   after   tea;   till  the   moment       of  Lady
  Middleton’s arrival; without once stirring from her seat; or altering
  her attitude; lost in her own thoughts; and insensible of her sister’s
  presence;   and   when   at   last   they   were   told   that   Lady   Middleton
  waited for them at the door; she started as if she had forgotten that
  any one was expected。
  They   arrived   in   due   time   at   the   place   of   destination;   and   as
  soon as the string of carriages before them would allow; alighted;
  ascended       the  stairs;   heard    their   names     announced       from   one
  landing…place to another in an audible voice; and entered a room
  splendidly lit up; quite full of company; and insufferably hot。 When
  they had paid their tribute of politeness by curtsying to the lady of
  the house; they were permitted to mingle   in   the   crowd; and   take
  their  share   of   the   heat  and   inconvenience;   to   which   their   arrival
  must   necessarily   add。   After   some   time   spent   in   saying   little    or
  doing less; Lady Middleton sat down to Casino; and as   Marianne
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  was     not   in  spirits   for  moving     about;    she   and    Elinor   luckily
  succeeding to chairs; placed themselves at no great distance from
  the table。
  They    had    not  remained      in  this  manner      long;  before    Elinor
  perceived   Willoughby;   standing   within   a         few   yards   of  them;   in
  earnest     conversation       with   a   very   fashionable      looking    young
  woman。 She soon caught his eye; and he immediately bowed; but
  without     attempting     to  speak    to  her;  or   to  approach     Marianne;
  though he could not but see her; and then continued his discourse
  with the same lady。 Elinor turned involuntarily to Marianne; to see
  whether it could be unobserved by her。 At that moment  she   first
  perceived   him;   and   her  whole countenance  glowing   with   sudden
  delight; she would have moved towards him instantly; had not her
  sister caught hold of her。
  “Good heavens!” she exclaimed; “he is there—he is there—Oh!
  why does he not look at me? why cannot I speak to him?”
  “Pray;   pray   be   composed;”   cried      Elinor;   “and   do   not   betray
  what you feel to every body present。 Perhaps he has not observed
  you yet。”
  This however was more than she could believe   herself; and   to
  be composed at such a moment was not only beyond the reach of
  Marianne;       it  was   beyond     her   wish。    She   sat   in  an   agony    of
  impatience which affected every feature。
  At   last   he   turned   round   again;   and   regarded   them   both;   she
  started up; and pronouncing his name in a tone of affection; held
  out    her  hand     to  him。   He   approached;      and   addressing      himself
  rather to Elinor than Marianne; as if wishing to avoid her eye; and
  determined       not   to  observe    her   attitude;   inquired    in  a  hurried
  manner after Mrs。 Dashwood; and asked how long they had been
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  in   town。   Elinor   was   robbed   of   all   presence   of   mind   by   such   an
  address;   and   was   unable   to   say   a   word。   But   the   feelings   of   her
  sister were instantly expressed。 Her face was crimsoned over; and
  she   exclaimed;   in   a    voice   of  the   greatest   emotion;   “Good   God!
  Willoughby; what is the meaning of this?                 Have you not  received
  my letters? Will you not shake hands with me?”
  He could not then avoid it; but her touch seemed painful to him;
  and he held her hand only for a moment。 During all this time he
  was     evidently     struggling      for  composure。        Elinor    watched      his
  countenance         and   saw    its  expression      becoming      more     tranquil。
  After a moment’s pause; he spoke with calmness。
  “I   did   myself    the   honour     of   calling   in  Berkeley…street       last
  Tuesday; and very much regretted that I was not fortunate enough
  to   find   yourselves   and   Mrs。   Jennings   at   home。   My   card   was   not
  lost; I hope。”
  “But have you not received   my  notes?”   cried   Marianne   in   the
  wildest anxiety。 “Here is some mistake I am sure—some dreadful
  mistake。 What can be the meaning of it? Tell me; Willoughby; for
  heaven’s sake tell me; what is the matter?”
  He     made     no   reply;    his   complexion       changed       and    all  his
  embarrassment   returned;   but   as           if;  on  catching   the    eye   of  the
  young lady with whom he had been previously talking; he felt the
  necessity of instant exertion; he recovered himself again; and after
  saying;   “Yes;   I   had   the   pleasure   of   receiving   the   information   of
  your   arrival   in   town;   which   you   were   so   good   as   to   send   me;”
  turned hastily away with a slight bow and join