Otherwise　you　might　fancy　it　was　I　who　was　sneering
  at　the　practice　of　devotion；　which　Miss　Sharp　finds　so
  ridiculous；　that　it　was　I　who　laughed　good…humouredly
  at　the　reeling　old　Silenus　of　a　baronetwhereas　the
  laughter　comes　from　one　who　has　no　reverence　except
  for　prosperity；　and　no　eye　for　anything　beyond　success。
  Such　people　there　are　living　and　flourishing　in　the　world
  Faithless；　Hopeless；　Charityless：　let　us　have　at　them；
  dear　friends；　with　might　and　main。　　Some　there　are；　and
  very　successful　too；　mere　quacks　and　fools：　and　it　was
  to　combat　and　expose　such　as　those；　no　doubt；　that
  Laughter　was　made。
  CHAPTER　IX
  Family　Portraits
  Sir　Pitt　Crawley　was　a　philosopher　with　a　taste　for　what　is
  called　low　life。　　His　first　marriage　with　the　daughter　of
  the　noble　Binkie　had　been　made　under　the　auspices　of
  his　parents；　and　as　he　often　told　Lady　Crawley　in　her
  lifetime　she　was　such　a　confounded　quarrelsome　high…bred
  jade　that　when　she　died　he　was　hanged　if　he　would　ever　take
  another　of　her　sort；　at　her　ladyship's　demise　he　kept　his
  promise；　and　selected　for　a　second　wife　Miss　Rose　Dawson；
  daughter　of　Mr。　John　Thomas　Dawson；　ironmonger；　of　Mudbury。
  What　a　happy　woman　was　Rose　to　be　my　Lady　Crawley！
  Let　us　set　down　the　items　of　her　happiness。　　In　the
  first　place；　she　gave　up　Peter　Butt；　a　young　man　who
  kept　company　with　her；　and　in　consequence　of　his
  disappointment　in　love；　took　to　smuggling；　poaching；　and　a
  thousand　other　bad　courses。　　Then　she　quarrelled；　as　in
  duty　bound；　with　all　the　friends　and　intimates　of　her　youth；
  who；　of　course；　could　not　be　received　by　my　Lady　at
  Queen's　Crawleynor　did　she　find　in　her　new　rank　and
  abode　any　persons　who　were　willing　to　welcome　her。
  Who　ever　did？　Sir　Huddleston　Fuddleston　had　three
  daughters　who　all　hoped　to　be　Lady　Crawley。　　Sir　Giles
  Wapshot's　family　were　insulted　that　one　of　the　Wapshot
  girls　had　not　the　preference　in　the　marriage；　and　the
  remaining　baronets　of　the　county　were　indignant　at　their
  comrade's　misalliance。　　Never　mind　the　commoners；　whom
  we　will　leave　to　grumble　anonymously。
  Sir　Pitt　did　not　care；　as　he　said；　a　brass　farden　for
  any　one　of　them。　　He　had　his　pretty　Rose；　and　what
  more　need　a　man　require　than　to　please　himself？　So　he
  used　to　get　drunk　every　night：　to　beat　his　pretty　Rose
  sometimes：　to　leave　her　in　Hampshire　when　he　went　to
  London　for　the　parliamentary　session；　without　a　single
  friend　in　the　wide　world。　　Even　Mrs。　Bute　Crawley；　the
  Rector's　wife；　refused　to　visit　her；　as　she　said　she　would
  never　give　the　pas　to　a　tradesman's　daughter。
  As　the　only　endowments　with　which　Nature　had　gifted
  Lady　Crawley　were　those　of　pink　cheeks　and　a　white
  skin；　and　as　she　had　no　sort　of　character；　nor　talents；
  nor　opinions；　nor　occupations；　nor　amusements；　nor　that
  vigour　of　soul　and　ferocity　of　temper　which　often　falls
  to　the　lot　of　entirely　foolish　women；　her　hold　upon　Sir
  Pitt's　affections　was　not　very　great。　　Her　roses　faded　out
  of　her　cheeks；　and　the　pretty　freshness　left　her　figure
  after　the　birth　of　a　couple　of　children；　and　she　became
  a　mere　machine　in　her　husband's　house　of　no　more　use
  than　the　late　Lady　Crawley's　grand　piano。　　Being　a　light…
  complexioned　woman；　she　wore　light　clothes；　as　most
  blondes　will；　and　appeared；　in　preference；　in　draggled　sea…
  green；　or　slatternly　sky…blue。　　She　worked　that　worsted
  day　and　night；　or　other　pieces　like　it。　　She　had
  counterpanes　in　the　course　of　a　few　years　to　all　the　beds　in
  Crawley。　　She　had　a　small　flower…garden；　for　which　she
  had　rather　an　affection；　but　beyond　this　no　other　like
  or　disliking。　　When　her　husband　was　rude　to　her　she　was
  apathetic：　whenever　he　struck　her　she　cried。　　She　had　not
  character　enough　to　take　to　drinking；　and　moaned　about；
  slipshod　and　in　curl…papers　all　day。　　0　Vanity　Fair
  Vanity　Fair！　This　might　have　been；　but　for　you；　a　cheery
  lassPeter　Butt　and　Rose　a　happy　man　and　wife；　in　a
  snug　farm；　with　a　hearty　family；　and　an　honest　portion
  of　pleasures；　cares；　hopes　and　strugglesbut　a　title　and
  a　coach　and　four　are　toys　more　precious　than　happiness
  in　Vanity　Fair：　and　if　Harry　the　Eighth　or　Bluebeard
  were　alive　now；　and　wanted　a　tenth　wife；　do　you　suppose
  he　could　not　get　the　prettiest　girl　that　shall　be　presented
  this　season？
  The　languid　dulness　of　their　mamma　did　not；　as　it
  may　be　supposed；　awaken　much　affection　in　her　little
  daughters；　but　they　were　very　happy　in　the　servants'　hall
  and　in　the　stables；　and　the　Scotch　gardener　having
  luckily　a　good　wife　and　some　good　children；　they　got　a
  little　wholesome　society　and　instruction　in　his　lodge；
  which　was　the　only　education　bestowed　upon　them　until
  Miss　Sharp　came。
  Her　engagement　was　owing　to　the　remonstrances　of
  Mr。　Pitt　Crawley；　the　only　friend　or　protector　Lady
  Crawley　ever　had；　and　the　only　person；　besides　her
  children；　for　whom　she　entertained　a　little　feeble
  attachment。　　Mr。　Pitt　took　after　the　noble　Binkies；　from
  whom　he　was　descended；　and　was　a　very　polite　and　proper
  gentleman。　　When　he　grew　to　man's　estate；　and　came
  back　from　Christchurch；　he　began　to　reform　the
  slackened　discipline　of　the　hall；　in　spite　of　his　father；　who
  stood　in　awe　of　him。　　He　was　a　man　of　such　rigid
  refinement；　that　he　would　have　starved　rather　than　have
  dined　without　a　white　neckcloth。　　Once；　when　just　from
  college；　and　when　Horrocks　the　butler　brought　him　a
  letter　without　placing　it　previously　on　a　tray；　he　gave
  that　domestic　a　look；　and　administered　to　him　a　speech
  so　cutting；　that　Horrocks　ever　after　trembled　before　him；
  the　whole　household　bowed　to　him：　Lady　Crawley's　curl…
  papers　came　off　earlier　when　he　was　at　home：　Sir　Pitt's
  muddy　gaiters　disappeared；　and　if　that　incorrigible　old
  man　still　adhered　to　other　old　habits；　he　never　fuddled
  himself　with　rum…and…water　in　his　son's　presence；　and
  only　talked　to　his　servants　in　a　very　reserved　and　polite
  manner；　and　those　persons　remarked　that　Sir　Pitt　never
  swore　at　Lady　Crawley　while　his　son　was　in　the　room。
  It　was　he　who　taught　the　butler　to　say；　〃My　lady　is
  served；〃　and　who　insisted　on　handing　her　ladyship　in　to
  dinner。　　He　seldom　spoke　to　her；　but　when　he　did　it　was
  with　the　most　powerful　respect；　and　he　never　let　her
  quit　the　apartment　without　rising　in　the　most　stately
  manner　to　open　the　door；　and　making　an　elegant　bow
  at　her　egress。
  At　Eton　he　was　called　Miss　Crawley；　and　there；　I
  am　sorry　to　say；　his　younger　brother　Rawdon　used　to
  lick　him　violently。　　But　though　his　parts　were　not
  brilliant；　he　made　up　for　his　lack　of　talent　by　meritorious
  industry；　and　was　never　known；　during　eight　years　at
  school；　to　be　subject　to　that　punishment　which　it　is
  generally　thought　none　but　a　cherub　can　escape。
  At　college　his　career　was　of　course　highly　creditable。
  And　here　he　prepared　himself　for　public　life；　into　which
  he　was　to　be　introduced　by　the　patronage　of　his
  grandfather；　Lord　Binkie；　by　studying　the　ancient　and　modern
  orators　with　great　assiduity；　and　by　speaking　unceasingly
  at　the　debating　societies。　　But　though　he　had　a　fine　flux
  of　words；　and　delivered　his　little　voice　with　great
  pomposity　and　pleasure　to　himself；　and　never　advanced
  any　sentiment　or　opinion　which　was　not　perfectly　trite　and
  stale；　and　supported　by　a　Latin　quotation；　yet　he　failed
  somehow；　in　spite　of　a　mediocrity　which　ought　to　have
  insured　any　man　a　success。　　He　did　not　even　get　the
  prize　poem；　which　all　his　friends　said　he　was　sure　of。
  After　leaving　college　he　became　Private　Secretary　to
  Lord　Binkie；　and　was　then　appointed　Attache　to　the
  Legation　at　Pumpernickel；　which　post　he　filled　with
  perfect　honour；　and　brought　home　despatches；　consisting　of
  Strasburg　pie；　to　the　Foreign　Minister　of　the　day。　　After
  remaining　ten　years　Attache　（several　years　after　the
  lamented　Lord　Binkie's　demise）；　and　finding　the
  advancement　slow；　he　at　length　gave　up　the　diplomatic
  service　in　some　disgust；　and　began　to　turn　country　gentleman。
  He　wrote　a　pamphlet　on　Malt　on　returning　to　England
  （for　he　was　an　ambitious　man；　and　always　liked
  to　be　before　the　public）；　and　took　a　strong　part　in　the
  Negro　Emancipation　question。　　Then　he　became　a　friend
  of　Mr。　Wilberforce's；　whose　politics　he　admired；　and　had
  that　famous　correspondence　with　the　Reverend　Silas
  Hornblower；　on　the　Ashantee　Mission。　　He　was　in
  London；　if　not　for　the　Parliament　session；　at　least　in　May；
  for　the　religious　meetings。　　In　the　country　he　was　a
  magistrate；　and　an　active　visitor　and　speaker　among　those
  destitute　of　religious　instruction。　　He　was　said　to　be
  paying　his　addresses　to　Lady　Jane　Sheepshanks；　Lord
  Southdown's　third　daughter；　and　whose　sister；　Lady　Emily；
  wrote　those　sweet　tracts；　〃The　Sailor's　True　Binnacle；〃
  and　〃The　Applewoman　of　Finchley　Common。〃
  Miss　Sharp's　accounts　of　his　employment　at　Queen's
  Crawley　were　not　caricatures。　　He　subjected　the　servants
  there　to　the　devotional　exercises　before　mentioned；　in
  which　（and　so　much　the　better）　he　brought　his　father
  to　join。　　He　patronised　an　Independent　meeting…house　in
  Crawley　parish；　much　to　the　indignation　of　his　uncle　the
  Rector；　and　to　the　consequent　delight　of　Sir　Pitt；　who
  was　induced　to　go　himself　once　or　twice；　which　occasioned
  some　violent　sermons　at　Crawley　parish　church；　directed
  point…blank　at　the　Baro