第 49 节
作者:想聊      更新:2021-02-19 01:11      字数:9321
  he cried to his wife; taking his son by the hand and going to the
  portico after her with a furious look in his eyes。
  〃On the contrary; Monsieur; you frightened me。 Your words hurt me
  cruelly;〃 she added; in a hollow voice。 〃If virtue does not consist in
  sacrificing everything to our children and our husband; what is
  virtue?〃
  〃Sac…ri…ficing!〃 cried the count; making each syllable the blow of a
  sledge…hammer on the heart of his victim。 〃What have you sacrificed to
  your children? What do you sacrifice to me? Speak! what means all
  this? Answer。 What is going on here? What did you mean by what you
  said?〃
  〃Monsieur;〃 she replied; 〃would you be satisfied to be loved for love
  of God; or to know your wife virtuous for virtue's sake?〃
  〃Madame is right;〃 I said; interposing in a shaken voice which
  vibrated in two hearts; 〃yes; the noblest privilege conferred by
  reason is to attribute our virtues to the beings whose happiness is
  our work; and whom we render happy; not from policy; nor from duty;
  but from an inexhaustible and voluntary affection〃
  A tear shone in Henriette's eyes。
  〃And; dear count;〃 I continued; 〃if by chance a woman is involuntarily
  subjected to feelings other than those society imposes on her; you
  must admit that the more irresistible that feeling is; the more
  virtuous she is in smothering it; in sacrificing herself to her
  husband and children。 This theory is not applicable to me who
  unfortunately show an example to the contrary; nor to you whom it will
  never concern。〃
  〃You have a noble soul; Felix;〃 said the count; slipping his arm; not
  ungracefully; round his wife's waist and drawing her towards him to
  say: 〃Forgive a poor sick man; dear; who wants to be loved more than
  he deserves。〃
  〃There are some hearts that are all generosity;〃 she said; resting her
  head upon his shoulder。 The scene made her tremble to such a degree
  that her comb fell; her hair rolled down; and she turned pale。 The
  count; holding her up; gave a sort of groan as he felt her fainting;
  he caught her in his arms as he might a child; and carried her to the
  sofa in the salon; where we all surrounded her。 Henriette held my hand
  in hers as if to tell me that we two alone knew the secret of that
  scene; so simple in itself; so heart…rending to her。
  〃I do wrong;〃 she said to me in a low voice; when the count left the
  room to fetch a glass of orange…flower water。 〃I have many wrongs to
  repent of towards you; I wished to fill you with despair when I ought
  to have received you mercifully。 Dear; you are kindness itself; and I
  alone can appreciate it。 Yes; I know there is a kindness prompted by
  passion。 Men have various ways of being kind; some from contempt;
  others from impulse; from calculation; through indolence of nature;
  but you; my friend; you have been absolutely kind。〃
  〃If that be so;〃 I replied; 〃remember that all that is good or great
  in me comes through you。 You know well that I am of your making。〃
  〃That word is enough for any woman's happiness;〃 she said; as the
  count re…entered the room。 〃I feel better;〃 she said; rising; 〃I want
  air。〃
  We went down to the terrace; fragrant with the acacias which were
  still in bloom。 She had taken my right arm; and pressed it against her
  heart; thus expressing her sad thoughts; but they were; she said; of a
  sadness dear to her。 No doubt she would gladly have been alone with
  me; but her imagination; inexpert in women's wiles; did not suggest to
  her any way of sending her children and the count back to the house。
  We therefore talked on indifferent subjects; while she pondered a
  means of pouring a few last thoughts from her heart to mine。
  〃It is a long time since I have driven out;〃 she said; looking at the
  beauty of the evening。 〃Monsieur; will you please order the carriage
  that I may take a turn?〃
  She knew that after evening prayer she could not speak with me; for
  the count was sure to want his backgammon。 She might have returned to
  the warm and fragrant terrace after her husband had gone to bed; but
  she feared; perhaps; to trust herself beneath those shadows; or to
  walk by the balustrade where our eyes could see the course of the
  Indre through the dear valley。 As the silent and sombre vaults of a
  cathedral lift the soul to prayer; so leafy ways; lighted by the moon;
  perfumed with penetrating odors; alive with the murmuring noises of
  the spring…tide; stir the fibres and weaken the resolves of those who
  love。 The country calms the old; but excites the young。 We knew it
  well。 Two strokes of the bell announced the hour of prayer。 The
  countess shivered。
  〃Dear Henriette; are you ill?〃
  〃There is no Henriette;〃 she said。 〃Do not bring her back。 She was
  capricious and exacting; now you have a friend whose courage has been
  strengthened by the words which heaven itself dictated to you。 We will
  talk of this later。 We must be punctual at prayers; for it is my day
  to lead them。〃
  As Madame de Mortsauf said the words in which she begged the help of
  God through all the adversities of life; a tone came into her voice
  which struck all present。 Did she use her gift of second sight to
  foresee the terrible emotion she was about to endure through my
  forgetfulness of an engagement made with Arabella?
  〃We have time to make three kings before the horses are harnessed;〃
  said the count; dragging me back to the salon。 〃You can go and drive
  with my wife; and I'll go to bed。〃
  The game was stormy; like all others。 The countess heard the count's
  voice either from her room or from Madeleine's。
  〃You show a strange hospitality;〃 she said; re…entering the salon。
  I looked at her with amazement; I could not get accustomed to the
  change in her; formerly she would have been most careful not to
  protect me against the count; then it gladdened her that I should
  share her sufferings and bear them with patience for love of her。
  〃I would give my life;〃 I whispered in her ear; 〃if I could hear you
  say again; as you once said; 'Poor dear; poor dear!'〃
  She lowered her eyes; remembering the moment to which I alluded; yet
  her glance turned to me beneath her eyelids; expressing the joy of a
  woman who finds the mere passing tones from her heart preferred to the
  delights of another love。 The count was losing the game; he said he
  was tired; as an excuse to give it up; and we went to walk on the lawn
  while waiting for the carriage。 When the count left us; such pleasure
  shone on my face that Madame de Mortsauf questioned me by a look of
  surprise and curiosity。
  〃Henriette does exist;〃 I said。 〃You love me still。 You wound me with
  an evident intention to break my heart。 I may yet be happy!〃
  〃There was but a fragment of that poor woman left; and you have now
  destroyed even that;〃 she said。 〃God be praised; he gives me strength
  to bear my righteous martyrdom。 Yes; I still love you; and I might
  have erred; the English woman shows me the abyss。〃
  We got into the carriage and the coachman asked for orders。
  〃Take the road to Chinon by the avenue; and come back by the
  Charlemagne moor and the road to Sache。〃
  〃What day is it?〃 I asked; with too much eagerness。
  〃Saturday。〃
  〃Then don't go that way; madame; the road will be crowded with
  poultry…men and their carts returning from Tours。〃
  〃Do as I told you;〃 she said to the coachman。 We knew the tones of our
  voices too well to be able to hide from each other our least emotion。
  Henriette understood all。
  〃You did not think of the poultry…men when you appointed this
  evening;〃 she said with a tinge of irony。 〃Lady Dudley is at Tours;
  and she is coming here to meet you; do not deny it。 'What day is
  it?the poultry…mentheir carts!' Did you ever take notice of such
  things in our old drives?〃
  〃It only shows that at Clochegourde I forget everything;〃 I answered;
  simply。
  〃She is coming to meet you?〃
  〃Yes。〃
  〃At what hour?〃
  〃Half…past eleven。〃
  〃Where?〃
  〃On the moor。〃
  〃Do not deceive me; is it not at the walnut…tree?〃
  〃On the moor。〃
  〃We will go there;〃 she said; 〃and I shall see her。〃
  When I heard these words I regarded my future life as settled。 I at
  once resolved to marry Lady Dudley and put an end to the miserable
  struggle which threatened to exhaust my sensibilities and destroy by
  these repeated shocks the delicate delights which had hitherto
  resembled the flower of fruits。 My sullen silence wounded the
  countess; the grandeur of whose mind I misjudged。
  〃Do not be angry with me;〃 she said; in her golden voice。 〃This; dear;
  is my punishment。 You can never be loved as you are here;〃 she
  continued; laying my hand upon her heart。 〃I now confess it; but Lady
  Dudley has saved me。 To her the stains;I do not envy them;to me
  the glorious love of angels! I have traversed vast tracts of thought
  since you returned here。 I have judged life。 Lift up the soul and you