第 34 节
作者:
想聊 更新:2021-02-19 01:11 字数:9322
effect as the sufferings of the early Christians; which strengthened
their faith and made God visible to them。 In hearts that abound in
love are there not incessant longings for a desired object; to which
the glowing fire of our dreams gives higher value and a deeper tint?
Are we not conscious of instigations which give to the beloved
features the beauty of the ideal by inspiring them with thought? The
past; dwelt on in all its details becomes magnified; the future teems
with hope。 When two hearts filled with these electric clouds meet each
other; their interview is like the welcome storm which revives the
earth and stimulates it with the swift lightnings of the thunderbolt。
How many tender pleasures came to me when I found these thoughts and
these sensations reciprocal! With what glad eyes I followed the
development of happiness in Henriette! A woman who renews her life
from that of her beloved gives; perhaps; a greater proof of feeling
than she who dies killed by a doubt; withered on her stock for want of
sap; I know not which of the two is the more touching。
The revival of Madame de Mortsauf was wholly natural; like the effects
of the month of May upon the meadows; or those of the sun and of the
brook upon the drooping flowers。 Henriette; like our dear valley of
love; had had her winter; she revived like the valley in the
springtime。 Before dinner we went down to the beloved terrace。 There;
with one hand stroking the head of her son; who walked feebly beside
her; silent; as though he were breeding an illness; she told me of her
nights beside his pillow。
For three months; she said; she had lived wholly within herself;
inhabiting; as it were; a dark palace; afraid to enter sumptuous rooms
where the light shone; where festivals were given; to her denied; at
the door of which she stood; one glance turned upon her child; another
to a dim and distant figure; one ear listening for moans; another for
a voice。 She told me poems; born of solitude; such as no poet ever
sang; but all ingenuously; without one vestige of love; one trace of
voluptuous thought; one echo of a poesy orientally soothing as the
rose of Frangistan。 When the count joined us she continued in the same
tone; like a woman secure within herself; able to look proudly at her
husband and kiss the forehead of her son without a blush。 She had
prayed much; she had clasped her hands for nights together over her
child; refusing to let him die。
〃I went;〃 she said; 〃to the gate of the sanctuary and asked his life
of God。〃
She had had visions; and she told them to me; but when she said; in
that angelic voice of hers; these exquisite words; 〃While I slept my
heart watched;〃 the count harshly interrupted her。
〃That is to say; you were half crazy;〃 he cried。
She was silent; as deeply hurt as though it were a first wound;
forgetting that for thirteen years this man had lost no chance to
shoot his arrows into her heart。 Like a soaring bird struck on the
wing by vulgar shot; she sank into a dull depression; then she roused
herself。
〃How is it; monsieur;〃 she said; 〃that no word of mine ever finds
favor in your sight? Have you no indulgence for my weakness;no
comprehension of me as a woman?〃
She stopped short。 Already she regretted the murmur; and measured the
future by the past; how could she expect comprehension? Had she not
drawn upon herself some virulent attack? The blue veins of her temples
throbbed; she shed no tears; but the color of her eyes faded。 Then she
looked down; that she might not see her pain reflected on my face; her
feelings guessed; her soul wooed by my soul; above all; not see the
sympathy of young love; ready like a faithful dog to spring at the
throat of whoever threatened his mistress; without regard to the
assailant's strength or quality。 At such cruel moments the count's air
of superiority was supreme。 He thought he had triumphed over his wife;
and he pursued her with a hail of phrases which repeated the one idea;
and were like the blows of an axe which fell with unvarying sound。
〃Always the same?〃 I said; when the count left us to follow the
huntsman who came to speak to him。
〃Always;〃 answered Jacques。
〃Always excellent; my son;〃 she said; endeavoring to withdraw Monsieur
de Mortsauf from the judgment of his children。 〃You see only the
present; you know nothing of the past; therefore you cannot criticise
your father without doing him injustice。 But even if you had the pain
of seeing that your father was to blame; family honor requires you to
bury such secrets in silence。〃
〃How have the changes at the Cassine and the Rhetoriere answered?〃 I
asked; to divert her mind from bitter thoughts。
〃Beyond my expectations;〃 she replied。 〃As soon as the buildings were
finished we found two excellent farmers ready to hire them; one at
four thousand five hundred francs; taxes paid; the other at five
thousand; both leases for fifteen years。 We have already planted three
thousand young trees on the new farms。 Manette's cousin is delighted
to get the Rabelaye; Martineau has taken the Baude。 All OUR efforts
have been crowned with success。 Clochegourde; without the reserved
land which we call the home…farm; and without the timber and
vineyards; brings in nineteen thousand francs a year; and the
plantations are becoming valuable。 I am battling to let the home…farm
to Martineau; the keeper; whose eldest son can now take his place。 He
offers three thousand francs if Monsieur de Mortsauf will build him a
farm…house at the Commanderie。 We might then clear the approach to
Clochegourde; finish the proposed avenue to the main road; and have
only the woodland and the vineyards to take care of ourselves。 If the
king returns; OUR pension will be restored; WE shall consent after
clashing a little with OUR wife's common…sense。 Jacques' fortune will
then be permanently secured。 That result obtained; I shall leave
monsieur to lay by as much as he likes for Madeleine; though the king
will of course dower her; according to custom。 My conscience is easy;
I have all but accomplished my task。 And you?〃 she said。
I explained to her the mission on which the king had sent me; and
showed her how her wise counsel had borne fruit。 Was she endowed with
second sight thus to foretell events?
〃Did I not write it to you?〃 she answered。 〃For you and for my
children alone I possess a remarkable faculty; of which I have spoken
only to my confessor; Monsieur de la Berge; he explains it by divine
intervention。 Often; after deep meditation induced by fears about the
health of my children; my eyes close to the things of earth and see
into another region; if Jacques and Madeleine there appear to me as
two luminous figures they are sure to have good health for a certain
period of time; if wrapped in mist they are equally sure to fall ill
soon after。 As for you; I not only see you brilliantly illuminated;
but I hear a voice which explains to me without words; by some mental
communication; what you ought to do。 Does any law forbid me to use
this wonderful gift for my children and for you?〃 she asked; falling
into a reverie。 Then; after a pause; she added; 〃Perhaps God wills to
take the place of their father。〃
〃Let me believe that my obedience is due to none but you;〃 I cried。
She gave me one of her exquisitely gracious smiles; which so exalted
my heart that I should not have felt a death…blow if given at that
moment。
〃As soon as the king returns to Paris; go there; leave Clochegourde;〃
she said。 〃It may be degrading to beg for places and favors; but it
would be ridiculous to be out of the way of receiving them。 Great
changes will soon take place。 The king needs capable and trustworthy
men; don't fail him。 It is well for you to enter young into the
affairs of the nation and learn your way; for statesmen; like actors;
have a routine business to acquire; which genius does not reveal; it
must be learnt。 My father heard the Duc de Choiseul say this。 Think of
me;〃 she said; after a pause; 〃let me enjoy the pleasures of
superiority in a soul that is all my own; for are you not my son?〃
〃Your son?〃 I said; sullenly。
〃Yes; my son!〃 she cried; mocking me; 〃is not that a good place in my
heart?〃
The bell rang for dinner; she took my arm and leaned contentedly upon
it。
〃You have grown;〃 she said; as we went up the steps。 When we reached
the portico she shook my arm a little; as if my looks were
importunate; for though her eyes were lowered she knew that I saw only
her。 Then she said; with a charming air of pretended impatience; full
of grace and coquetry; 〃Come; why don't you look at our dear valley?〃
She turned; held her white silk sun…shade over our heads and drew
Jacques closely to her side。 The motion of her head as she looked
towards the Indre; the punt; the meadows; showed me that in my absence
she had come to many an understanding w