which　has　done　so　much　to　prolong　human　life　and　alleviate　human　misery。〃
  Alfred　was　now　ordered　to　feed　Jemmy；　which　he　did：　so　quickly　were　their　parts　inverted。
  Directly　after　breakfast　Alfred　demanded　to　see　the　proprietor　of　the　asylum。
  Answer：　Doesn't　live　here。
  The　Doctor　then。
  Oh；　he　has　not　come。
  This　monstrosity　irritated　Alfred：　〃Well；　then；〃　said　he；　〃whoever　it　is　that　rules　this　den　of　thieves；　when　those　two　are　out　of　it。〃
  〃I　rule　in　Mr。　Baker's　absence；〃　said　the　head　keeper；　〃and　I'll　teach　you　manners；　you　young　blackguard。　Handcuff　him。〃
  In　five　minutes　Alfred　was　handcuffed　and　flung　into　a　padded　room。
  〃Stay　there　till　you　know　how　to　speak　to　your　betters；〃　said　the　head　keeper。
  Alfred　walked　up　and　down　grinding　his　teeth　with　rage　for　five　long　hours。
  Just　before　dinner　Brown　came　and　took　him　into　a　parlour；　where　Mrs。　Archbold　was　seated　writing。　Brown　retired。　The　lady　finished　what　she　was　doing；　and　kept　Alfred　standing　like　a　schoolboy　going　to　be　lectured。　At　last　she　said；　〃I　have　sent　for　you　to　give　you　a　piece　of　advice：　it　is　to　try　and　make　friends　with　the　attendants。〃
  〃Me　make　friends　with　the　scoundrels！　I　thirst　for　their　lives。　Oh；　madam；　I　fear　I　shall　kill　somebody　here。〃
  〃Foolish　boy；　they　are　too　strong　for　you。　Your　worst　enemies　could　wish　nothing　worse　for　you　than　that　you　should　provoke　them。〃　In　saying　these　words　she　was　so　much　more　kind　and　womanly　that　Alfred　conceived　hopes；　and　burst　out；　〃Oh；　madam；　you　are　human　then；　you　seem　to　pity　me；　pray　give　me　pen　and　paper；　and　let　me　write　to　my　friends　to　get　me　out　of　this　terrible　place；　do　not　refuse　me。〃
  Mrs。　Archbold　resumed　her　distant　manner　without　apparent　effort：　she　said　nothing；　but　she　placed　writing　materials　before　him。　She　then　left　the　room；　and　locked　him　in。
  He　wrote　a　few　hasty　ardent　words　to　Julia；　telling　her　how　he　had　been　entrapped；　but　not　a　word　about　his　sufferingshe　was　too　generous　to　give　her　needless　painand　a　line　to　Edward；　imploring　him　to　come　at　once　with　a　lawyer　and　an　honest　physician；　and　liberate　him。
  Mrs。　Archbold　returned　soon　after；　and　he　asked　her　if　she　would　lend　him　sealing…wax：　〃I　dare　not　trust　to　an　envelope　in　such　a　place　as　this；〃　said　he。　She　lent　him　sealing…wax。
  〃But　how　am　I　to　post　it？〃　said　he。
  〃Easily：　there　is　a　box　in　the　house；　I　will　show　you。〃
  She　took　him　and　showed　him　the　box：　he　put　his　letters　into　it；　and　in　the　ardour　of　his　gratitude　kissed　her　hand。　She　winced　a　little　and　said；　〃Mind；　this　is　not　by　my　advice；　I　would　never　tell　my　friends　I　had　been　in　a　madhouse；　oh；　never。　I　would　be　calm；　make　friends　with　the　servants　they　are　the　real　mastersand　never　let　a　creature　know　where　I　had　been。〃
  〃Oh；　you　don't　know　my　Julia；〃　said　Alfred；　〃she　will　never　desert　me；　never　think　the　worse　of　me　because　I　have　been　entrapped　illegally　into　a　madhouse。〃
  〃Illegally；　Mr。　Hardie！　you　deceive　yourself；　Mr。　Baker　told　me　the　order　was　signed　by　a　relation；　and　the　certificates　by　first…rate　lunacy　doctors。〃
  〃What　on　earth　has　that　to　do　with　it；　madam；　when　I　am　as　sane　as　you　are？〃
  〃It　has　everything　to　do　with　it。　Mr。　Baker　could　be　punished　for　confining　a　madman　in　this　house　without　an　order　and　two　certificates；　but　he　couldn't　for　confining　a　sane　person　under　an　order　and　two　certificates。〃
  Alfred　could　not　believe　this；　but　she　convinced　him　that　it　was　so。
  Then　he　began　to　fear　he　should　be　imprisoned　for　years：　he　turned　pale；　and　looked　at　her　so　piteously；　that　to　soothe　him　she　told　him　sane　people　were　never　kept　in　asylums　now；　they　only　used　to　be。
  〃How　can　they？〃　said　she。　〃The　London　asylums　are　visited　four　times　a　year　by　the　commissioners；　and　the　country　asylums　six　times；　twice　by　the　commissioners；　and　four　times　by　the　justices。　_We_　shall　be　inspected　this　week　or　next；　and　then　you　can　speak　to　the　justices：　mind　and　be　calm；　say　it　is　a　mistake；　offer　testimony；　and　ask　either　to　be　discharged　at　once　or　to　have　a　commission　of　lunacy　sit　on　you。　Ten　to　one　your　friends　will　not　face　public　proceedings：　but　you　must　begin　at　the　foundation；　by　making　the　servants　friendlyand　bybeing　calm。〃　She　then　fixed　her　large　grey　eyes　on　him　and　said；　〃Now　if　I　let　you　dine　with　me　and　the　first…class　patients；　will　you　pledge　me　your　honour　to　'be　calm；'　and　not　attempt　to　escape？〃　Alfred　hesitated　at　that。　Her　eye　dissected　his　character　all　the　time。　〃I　promise；〃　said　he　at　last　with　a　deep　sigh。　〃May　I　sit　by　you？　There　is　something　so　repugnant　in　the　very　idea　of　mad　people。〃
  〃Try　and　remember　it　is　their　misfortune；　not　their　crime；〃　said　Mrs。　Archbold；　just　like　a　matronly　sister　admonishing　a　brother　from　school。
  She　then　whistled　in　a　whisper　for　Brown；　who　was　lurking　about　unseen　all　the　time。　He　emerged　and　walked　about　with　Alfred；　and　by…and…bye；　looking　down　from　a　corridor；　they　saw　Mrs。　Archbold　driving　the　second…class　women　before　her　to　dinner　like　a　flock　of　animals。　Whenever　one　stopped　to　look　at　anything；　or　try　and　gossip；　the　philanthropic　Archbold　went　at　her　just　like　a　shepherd's　dog　at　a　refractory　sheep；　caught　her　by　the　shoulders；　and　drove　her　squeaking　headlong。
  At　dinner　Alfred　was　so　fortunate　as　to　sit　opposite　a　gentleman；　who　nodded　and　grinned　at　him　all　dinner　with　a　horrible　leer。　He　could　not；　however；　enjoy　this　to　the　full　for　a　little　distraction　at　his　elbow：　his　right　hand　neighbour　kept　forking　pieces　out　of　his　plate　and　substituting　others　from　his　own。　There　was　even　a　tendency　to　gristle　in　the　latter。　Alfred　remonstrated　gently　at　first；　the　gentleman　forbore　a　minute；　then　recommenced。　Alfred　laid　a　hand　very　quietly　on　his　wrist　and　put　it　back。　Mrs。　Archbold's　quick　eye　surprised　this　gesture：　〃What　is　the　matter　there？〃　said　she。
  〃Oh；　nothing　serious；　madam；〃　replied　Alfred；　〃only　this　gentleman　does　me　the　honour　to　prefer　the　contents　of　my　plate　to　his　own。〃
  〃Mr。　Cooper！〃　said　the　Archbold　sternly。
  Cooper；　the　head　keeper；　pounced　on　the　offender；　seized　him　roughly　by　the　collar；　dragged　him　from　the　table；　knocking　his　chair　down；　and　bundled　him　out　of　the　room　with　ignominy　and　fracas；　in　spite　of　a　remonstrance　from　Alfred；　〃Oh；　don't　be　so　rough　with　the　poor　man。
  Then　the　novice　laid　down　his　knife　and　fork；　and　ate　no　more。　〃I　am　grieved　at　my　own　ill…nature　in　complaining　of　such　a　trifle；〃　said　he　when　all　was　quiet
  The　company　stared　considerably　at　this　remark：　it　seemed　to　them　a　most　morbid　perversion　of　sensibility；　for　the　deranged；　thin…skinned　beyond　conception　in　their　own　persons；　and　alive　to　the　shadow　of　the　shade　of　a　wrong；　are　stoically　indifferent　to　the　woes　of　others。
  Though　Alfred　was　quiet　as　a　lamb　all　day；　the　attendants　returned　him　to　the　padded　room　at　night；　because　he　had　been　there　last　night。　But　they　only　fastened　one　ankle　to　the　bed…post：　so　he　encountered　his　Lilliputians　on　tolerably　fair　termsnumbers　excepted：　they　swarmed。　Unable　to　sleep；　he　put　out　his　hand　and　groped　for　his　clothes。　But　they　were　outside　the　door；　according　to　rule。
  Day　broke　at　last：　and　he　took　his　breakfast　quietly　with　the　first…class　patients。　It　consisted　of　cool　tea　in　small　basins　instead　of　cups；　and　table…spoons　instead　of　tea…spoons；　and　thick　slices　of　stale　bread　thinly　buttered。　A　few　patients　had　gruel　or　porridge　instead　of　tea。　After　breakfast　Alfred　sat　in　the　first…class　patients'　room　and　counted　the　minutes　and　the　hours　till　Edward　should　come。　After　dinner　he　counted　the　hours　till　tea…time。　Nobody　came；　and　he　went　to　bed　in　such　grief　and　disappointment　as　some　men　live　to　eighty　without　ever　knowing。
  But　when　two　o'clock　came　next　day；　and　no　Edward；　and　no　reply；　then　the　distress　of　his　soul　deepened。　He　implored　Mrs。　Archbold　to　tell　him　what　was　the　cause。　She　shook　her　head　and　said　gravely；　it　was　but　too　common；　a　man's　nearest　and　dearest　were　very　apt　to　hold　aloof　from　him　the　moment　he　was　put　into　an　asylum。
  Here　an　old　lady　put　in　her　word。　〃Ah；　sir；　you　must　not　hope　to　hear　from　anybody　in　this　place。　Why；　I　have　been　two　years　writing　and　writing；　and　can't　get　a　line　from　my　own　daughter。　To　be　sure　she　is　a　fine　lady　now：　but　it　was　her　poor　neglected　mother　that　pinched　and　pinched　to　give　her　a　good　education；　and　that　is　how　she　caught　a　good　husband。　But　it's　my　belief　the　post　in　our　hall　isn't　a　real　post：　but　only　a　box；　and　I　think　it　is　contrived　so　as　the　letters　fall　down　a　pipe　into　that　Baker's　hands；　and　so　then　when　the　postman　comes〃　　The　Archbold　bent　her　bushy　brows　on　this　chatty　personage。　〃Be　quiet；　Mrs。　Dent；　you　are　talking　nonsense；　and　exciting　yourself：　you　know　you　are　not　to　speak　on　that　topic。　Take　care。〃
  The　poor　old　woman　was　shut　up　like　a　knife；　for　the　Archbold　had　a　way　of　addressing　her　own　sex　that　crushed　them。　The　change　was　almost　comically　sudden　to　the　mellow　tones　in　which　she　addressed　Alfred　the　very　next　moment；　on　the　very　same　subject：　〃Mr。　Baker；　I　believe；　sees　the　letters：　and；　where　our　poor　patients　（with　a　glance　at　Dent）　write　in　such　a　way　as　to　wound　and　perhaps　terrify　those　who　are　in　reality　their　best　friends；　they　are　not　always　sent。　But　I　conclu