第 73 节
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th my father; nor to insult him; God knows: and I entreat you for both our sakes not to try my temper too hard by these childish attempts to blind me: and; sir; pray dismiss from your mind the notion that I have disclosed to any living soul my knowledge of this horrible secret: on the contrary; I have kept it gnawing my heart and almost maddening me at times。 For my own personal satisfaction I have applied a test both to you and Skinner; but that is all I have done: I have not told dear Julia; nor any of her family; and now; if you will only listen to me; and do what I entreat you to do; she shall never know; oh; never。〃
〃Oho!〃 thought Mr。 Hardie; 〃he comes with a proposal: I'll hear it; anyway。〃
He then took a line well known to artful men: he encouraged Alfred to show his hand; maintaining a complete reserve as to his own; 〃You say you did not communicate your illusion about this fourteen thousand pounds to Julia Dodd that night: May I ask then (without indiscretion) what did pass between you two?〃
〃I will tell you; sir。 She saw me standing there; and asked me in her own soft angel voice if I was unhappy。 I told her I must be a poor creature if I could be happy。 Then she asked me; with some hesitation I thought; why I was unhappy。 I said; because I could not see the path of honour and duty clear: that at least was the purport。 Then she told me that in all difficulties she had found the best way was to pray to God to guide her; and she begged me to lay my care before Him and ask His counsel。 And then I thanked her; and bade her good…night; and she me; and that was all that passed between us two unhappy lovers; whom you have made miserable; and even cool to one another; but not hostile to you。 And you played the spy on us; sir; and misunderstood us; as spies generally do。 Ah; sir! a few months ago you would not have condescended to that。〃
Mr。 Hardie coloured; but did not reply。 He had passed from the irritable into the quietly vindictive stage。
Alfred then deprecated further discussion of what was past; and said abruptly; 〃I have an offer to make you: in a very short time I shall have ten thousand pounds; I will not resign my whole fortune; that would be unjust to myself; and my wife; and I loathe and despise Injustice in all its forms; however romantic or plausible。 But; if you will give the Dodds their L。 14;000; I will share my little fortune equally with you: and thank you; and bless you。 Consider; sir; with your abilities and experience five thousand pounds may yet be the nucleus of a fortune; a fortune built on an honourable foundation。 I know you will thrive with my five thousand pounds ten times more than with their fourteen thousand; and enjoy the blessing of blessings; a clear conscience。〃
Now this offer was no sooner made than Mr。 Hardie shut his face; and went to mental arithmetic; like one doing a sum behind a thick door。 He would have taken ten thousand: but five thousand did not much tempt him: besides; would it be five thousand clear? He already owed Alfred two thousand five hundred。 It flashed through him that a young man who loathed and despised Injusticeeven to himselfwould not consent to be diddled by him out of one sum while making him a present of another: and then there was Skinner's thousand to be reimbursed。 He therefore declined in these terms:
〃This offer shows me you are sincere in these strange notions you have taken up。 I am sorry for it: it looks like insanity。 These nocturnal illusions; these imaginary sights and sounds; come of brooding on a single idea; and often usher in a calamity one trembles to think of。 You have made me a proposal: I make you one: take a couple of hundred pounds (I'll get it from your trustees) and travel the Continent for four months; enlarge and amuse your mind with the contemplation of nature and manners and customs; and if that does not clear this phantom L。 14;000 out of your head; I am much mistaken。〃
Alfred replied that foreign travel was his dream: but he could not leave Barkington while there was an act of justice to be done。
〃Then do me justice; boy;〃 said Mr。 Hardie; with wonderful dignity; all things considered。 〃Instead of brooding on your one fantastical idea; and shutting out all rational evidence to the contrary; take the trouble to look through my books: and they will reveal to you a fortune; not of fourteen thousand; but of eighty thousand pounds; honourably sacrificed in the vain struggle to fulfil my engagements: who; do you think; will believe; against such evidence; the preposterous tale you have concocted against your poor father? Already the tide is turning; and all who have seen the accounts of the Bank pity me; they will pity me still more if ever they hear my own flesh and blood insults me in the moment of my fall; sees me ruined by my honesty and living in a hovel; yet comes into that poor but honest abode; and stabs me to the heart by accusing me of stealing fourteen thousand pounds: a sum that would have saved me; if I could only have laid my hands on it。〃
He hid his face; to conceal its incongruous expression: and heaved a deep sigh。
Alfred turned his head away and groaned。
After a while he rose from his seat and went to the door; but seemed reluctant to go: he cast a longing; lingering look on his father; and said beseechingly: 〃Oh think! you are not my flesh and blood more than I am yours; is all the love to be on my side? Have I no influence even when right is on my side?〃 Then he suddenly turned and threw himself impetuously on his knees: 〃Your father was the soul of honour; your son loathed fraud and injustice from his cradle; you stand between two generations of Hardies; and belong to neither; do but reflect one moment how bright a thing honour is; how short and uncertain a thing life is; how sure a thing retribution is; in this world or the next: it is your guardian angel that kneels before you now; and not your son: oh; for Christ's sake; for my mother's sake; listen to my last appeal。 You don't know me: I cannot compound with injustice。 Pity me; pity her I love; pity yourself!〃
〃You young viper!〃 cried the father; stung with remorse; but not touched with penitence。 〃Get away; you amorous young hypocrite; get out of my house; get out of my sight; or I shall spurn you and curse you at my feet。〃
〃Enough!〃 said Alfred; rising and turning suddenly calm as a statue: 〃let us be gentlemen; if you please; even though we must be enemies。 Good…bye; my father that _was。_〃
And he walked gently out of the room; and; as he passed the window Mr。 Hardie heard his great heart sob。
He wiped his forehead with his handkerchief。 〃A hard tussle;〃 thought he; 〃and with my own unnatural; ungrateful flesh and blood; but I have won it: he hasn't told the Dodds; he never will; and; if he did; who would believe him; or them?〃
At dinner there was no Alfred; but after dinner a note to Jane informing her he had taken lodgings in the town; and requesting her to send his books and clothes in the evening。 Jane handed the note to her father: and sighed deeply。 Watching his face as he read it; she saw him turn rather pale; and look more furrowed than ever。
〃Papa!〃 said she; 〃what _does_ it all mean!〃
〃I am thinking。〃
Then; after a long pause; he ground his teeth and said; 〃It meansWar: War between my own son and me。〃
CHAPTER XXVI
LONG before this open rupture Jane Hardie had asked her father sorrowfully; whether she was to discontinue her intimacy with the Dodds: she thought of course he would say 〃Yes;〃 and it cost her a hard struggle between inclination and filial duty to raise the question。 But Mr。 Hardie was anxious her friendship with that family should continue; it furnished a channel of news; and in case of detection might be useful to avert or soften hostilities; so he answered rather sharply; 〃On no account: the Dodds are an estimable family: pray be as friendly with them as ever you can。〃 Jane coloured with pleasure at this most unexpected reply; but her wakeful conscience reminded her; this answer was given in ignorance of her attachment to Edward Dodd; and urged her to confession。 But at that Nature recoiled: Edward had not openly declared his love to her; so modest pride; as well as modest shame; combined with female cowardice to hold back the avowal。
So then Miss Tender Conscience tormented herself; and recorded the struggle in her diary; but briefly; and in terms vague and typical; not a word about 〃a young man〃or 〃crossed in love〃but one obscure and hasty slap at the carnal affections; and a good deal about 〃the saints in prison;〃 and 〃the battle of Armageddon。〃
Yet; to do her justice; laxity of expression did not act upon her conduct and warp that as it does most mystical speakers。
To obey her father to the letter; she maintained a friendly correspondence with Julia Dodd; exchanging letters daily; but; not to disobey him in the spirit; she ceased to visit Albion Villa。 Thus she avoided Edward; and extracted from the situation the utmost self…denial; and the least possible amount of 〃carnal pleasure;〃 as she naively denominated an interchange of worldly affection; however distant and respectful。
One day she happened to mention her diary; and say it was a present comfort to her; and inst