in　the　newspapers；　just　as　we　have　the　Police　Courts　and
  the　Court　News　at　present。　　When　a　flagrant　case　of　bone…
  crushing　or　Poor…law　abuse　occurs　in　the　world；　who　so
  eloquent　as　THE　TIMES　to　point　it　out？　　When　a　gross
  instance　of　Snobbishness　happens；　why　should　not　the
  indignant　journalist　call　the　public　attention　to　that
  delinquency　too？
  How；　for　instance；　could　that　wonderful　case　of　the　Earl
  of　Mangelwurzel　and　his　brother　be　examined　in　the
  Snobbish　point　of　view？　　Let　alone　the　hectoring；　the
  bullying；　the　vapouring；　the　bad　grammar；　the　mutual
  recriminations；　lie…givings；　challenges；　retractations；
  which　abound　in　the　fraternal　disputeput　out　of　the
  question　these　points　as　concerning　the　individual
  nobleman　and　his　relative；　with　whose　personal　affairs　we
  have　nothing　to　doand　consider　how　intimately　corrupt；
  how　habitually　grovelling　and　mean；　how　entirely　Snobbish
  in　a　word；　a　whole　county　must　be　which　can　find　no
  better　chiefs　or　leaders　than　these　two　gentlemen。　　'We
  don't　want；'　the　great　county　of　Mangelwurzelshire　seems
  to　say；　'that　a　man　should　be　able　to　write　good　grammar；
  or　that　he　should　keep　a　Christian　tongue　in　his　head；　or
  that　he　should　have　the　commonest　decency　of　temper；　or
  even　a　fair　share　of　good　sense；　in　order　to　represent　us
  in　Parliament。
  All　we　require　is；　that　a　man　should　be　recommended　to　us
  by　the　Earl　of　Mangelwurzelshire。　　And　all　that　we
  require　of　the　Earl　of　Mangelwurzelshire　is　that　he
  should　have　fifty　thousand　a　year　and　hunt　the　country。'
  O　you　pride　of　all　Snobland！　　O　you　crawling；　truckling；
  self…confessed　lackeys　and　parasites！
  But　this　is　growing　too　savage：　don't　let　us　forget　our
  usual　amenity；　and　that　tone　of　playfulness　and　sentiment
  with　which　the　beloved　reader　and　writer　have　pursued
  their　mutual　reflections　hitherto。　　Well；　Snobbishness
  pervades　the　little　Social　Farce　as　well　as　the　great
  State　Comedy；　and　the　self…same　moral　is　tacked　to
  either。
  There　was；　for　instance；　an　account　in　the　papers　of　a
  young　lady　who；　misled　by　a　fortune…teller；　actually　went
  part　of　the　way　to　India　（as　far　as　Bagnigge　Wells；　I
  think；）　in　search　of　a　husband　who　was　promised　her
  there。　　Do　you　suppose　this　poor　deluded　little　soul
  would　have　left　her　shop　for　a　man　below　her　in　rank；　or
  for　anything　but　a　darling　of　a　Captain　in　epaulets　and　a
  red　coat。　　It　was　her　Snobbish　sentiment　that　misled　her；
  and　made　her　vanities　a　prey　to　the　swindling　fortune…
  teller。
  Case　2　was　that　of　Mademoiselle　de　Saugrenue；　'the
  interesting　young　Frenchwoman　with　a　profusion　of　jetty
  ringlets；'　who　lived　for　nothing　at　a　boardinghouse　at
  Gosport；　was　then　conveyed　to　Fareham　gratis：　and　being
  there；　and　lying　on　the　bed　of　the　good　old　lady　her
  entertainer；　the　dear　girl　took　occasion　to　rip　open　the
  mattress；　and　steal　a　cash…box；　with　which　she　fled　to
  London。　　How　would　you　account　for　the　prodigious
  benevolence　exercised　towards　the　interesting　young
  French　lady？　　Was　it　her　jetty　ringlets　or　her　charming
  face？Bah！　　Do　ladies　love　others　for　having　faces　and
  black　hair？she　said　SHE　WAS　A　RELATION　OF　de　Saugrenue：
  talked　of　her　ladyship　her　aunt；　and　of　herself　as　a　De
  Saugrenue。　　The　honest　boarding…house　people　were　at　her
  feet　at　once。　　Good；　honest；　simple；　lord…loving　children
  of　Snobland。
  Finally；　there　was　the　case　of　'the　Right　Honourable　Mr。
  Vernon；'　at　York。　　The　Right　Honourable　was　the　son　of　a
  nobleman；　and　practised　on　an　old　lady。　　He　procured　from
  her　dinners；　money；　wearing…apparel；　spoons；　implicit
  credence；　and　an　entire　refit　of　linen。　　Then　he　cast　his
  nets　over　a　family　of　father；　mother；　and　daughters；　one
  of　whom　he　proposed　to　marry。　　The　father　lent　him　money；
  the　mother　made　jams　and　pickles　for　him；　the　daughters
  vied　with　each　other　in　cooking　dinners　for　the　Right
  Honourableand　what　was　the　end？　　One　day　the　traitor
  fled；　with　a　teapot　and　a　basketful　of　cold　victuals。　　It
  was　the　'Right　Honourable'　which　baited　the　hook　which
  gorged　all　these　greedy；　simple　Snobs。　　Would　they　have
  been　taken　in　by　a　commoner？　　What　old　lady　is　there；　my
  dear　sir；　who　would　take　in　you　and　me；　were　we　ever　so
  ill　to　do；　and　comfort　us；　and　clothe　us；　and　give　us　her
  money；　and　her　silver　forks？　　Alas　and　alas！　what　mortal
  man　that　speaks　the　truth　can　hope　for　such　a　landlady？
  And　yet；　all　these　instances　of　fond　and　credulous
  Snobbishness　have　occurred　in　the　same　week's　paper；　with
  who　knows　how　many　score　more？
  Just　as　we　had　concluded　the　above　remarks　comes　a　pretty
  little　note　sealed　with　a　pretty　little　butterfly
  bearing　a　northern　postmarkand　to　the　following
  effect：…
  '19th　November。
  'Mr。　Punch；'Taking　great　interest　in　your　Snob　Papers；
  we　are　very　anxious　to　know　under　what　class　of　that
  respectable　fraternity　you　would　designate　us。
  'We　are　three　sisters；　from　seventeen　to　twenty…two。　　Our
  father　is　HONESTLY　AND　TRULY　of　a　very　good　family　（you
  will　say　it　is　Snobbish　to　mention　that；　but　I　wish　to
  state　the　plain　fact）；　our　maternal　grandfather　was　an
  Earl。'　（1）
  'We　CAN　afford　to　take　in　a　stamped　edition　of　YOU；　and
  all　Dickens'　works　as　fast　as　they　come　out；　but　we　do
  NOT　keep　such　a　thing　as　a　PEERAGE　or　even　a　BARONETAGE
  in　the　house。
  'We　live　with　every　comfort；　excellent　cellar；　&c。　&c。；
  but　as　we　cannot　well　afford　a　butler；　we　have　a　neat
  table…maid　（though　our　father　was　a　military　man；　has
  travelled　much；　been　in　the　best　society；　&c。）　　We　HAVE　a
  coachman　and　helper；　but　we　don't　put　the　latter　into
  buttons；　nor　make　them　wait　at　table；　like　Stripes　and
  Tummus。'　（2）
  'We　are　just　the　same　to　persons　with　a　handle　to　their
  name　as　to　those　without　it。　　We　wear　a　moderate　modicum
  of　crinoline；　（3）and　are　never　limp　（4）　in　the　morning。
  We　have　good　and　abundant　dinners　on　CHINA　（though　we
  have　plate　（5）；　and　just　as　good　when　alone　as　with
  company。
  'Now；　my　dear　MR。　PUNCH；　will　you　PLEASE　give　us　a　short
  answer　in　your　next　number；　and　I　will　be　SO　much　obliged
  to　you。　　Nobody　knows　we　are　writing　to　you；　not　even　our
  father；　nor　will　we　ever　tease　（6）　you　again　if　you　will
  only　give　us　an　answerjust　for　FUN；　now　do！
  'If　you　get　as　far　as　this；　which　is　doubtful；　you　will
  probably　fling　it　into　the　fire。　　If　you　do；　I　cannot
  help　it；　but　I　am　of　a　sanguine　disposition；　and
  entertain　a　lingering　hope。　　At　all　events；　I　shall　be
  impatient　for　next　Sunday；　for　you　reach　us　on　that　day；
  and　I　am　ashamed　to　confess；　we　CANNOT　resist　opening　you
  in　the　carriage　driving　home　from　church。　（7）
  'I　remain；　&c。　&c。；　for　myself　and　sisters。
  Excuse　this　scrawl；　but　I　always　write　headlong。　（8）
  'P。　S。You　were　rather　stupid　last　week；　don't　you
  think？　（9）　　We　keep　no　gamekeeper；　and　yet　have　always
  abundant　game　for　friends　to　shoot；　in　spite　of　the
  poachers。　　We　never　write　on　perfumed　paperin　short；　I
  can't　help　thinking　that　if　you　knew　us　you　would　not
  think　us　Snobs。'
  To　this　I　reply　in　the　following　manner：'My　dear　young
  ladies；　I　know　your　post…town：　and　shall　be　at　church
  there　the　Sunday　AFTER　next；　when；　will　you　please　to
  wear　a　tulip　or　some　little　trifle　in　your　bonnets；　so
  that　I　may　know　you？　　You　will　recognize　me　and　my　dress…
  …a　quiet…looking　young　fellow；　in　a　white　top…coat；　a
  crimson　satin　neckcloth；　light　blue　trousers；　with　glossy
  tipped　boots；　and　an　emerald　breast…pin。　　I　shall　have　a
  black　crape　round　my　white　hat；　and　my　usual　bamboo　cane
  with　the　richly…gilt　knob。　　I　am　sorry　there　will　be　no
  time　to　get　up　moustaches　between　now　and　next　week。
  'From　seventeen　to　two…and…twenty！　　Ye　gods！　what　ages！
  Dear　young　creatures；　I　can　see　you　all　three。　　Seventeen
  suits　me；　as　nearest　my　own　time　of　life；　but　mind；　I
  don't　say　two…and…twenty　is　too　old。　　No；　no。　　And　that
  pretty；　roguish；　demure；　middle　one。　　Peace；　peace；　thou
  silly　little　fluttering　heart！
  'YOU　Snobs；　dear　young　ladies！　　I　will　pull　any　man's
  nose　who　says　so。　　There　is　no　harm　in　being　of　a　good
  family。　　You　can't　help　it；　poor　dears。　　What's　in　a
  name？　　What　is　in　a　handle　to　it？　　I　confess　openly　that
  I　should　not　object　to　being　a　Duke　myself；　and　between
  ourselves　you　might　see　a　worse　leg　for　a　garter。
  'YOU　Snobs；　dear　little　good…natured　things；　no　that　is；
  I　hope　notI　think　notI　won't　be　too　confidentnone
  of　us　should　bethat　we　are　not　Snobs。　　That　very
  confidence　savours　of　arrogance；　and　to　be　arrogant　is　to
  be　a　Snob。　　In　all　the　social　gradations　from　sneak　to
  tyrant；　nature　has　placed　a　most　wondrous　and　various
  progeny　of　Snobs。　　But　are　there　no　kindly　natures；　no
  tender　hearts；　no　souls　humble；　simple；　and　truth…loving？
  Ponder　well　on　this　question；　sweet　young　ladies。　　And　if
  you　can　answer　it；　as　no　doubt　you　canlucky　are　you
  and　lucky　the　respected　Herr　Papa；　and　lucky　the　three
  handsome　yo