第 31 节
作者:向前      更新:2021-02-18 21:59      字数:9321
  Ann seemed thoughtful。  〃What is he doing here in New York?〃 she
  wondered。
  〃Looking for a lady named Sylvia;〃 answered Matthew。
  He thought the time was come to break it to her that he was a great
  and famous man。  Then perhaps she would be sorry she had said what
  she had said in the cab。  Seeing he had made up his mind that his
  relationship to her in the future would be that of an affectionate
  brother; there would be no harm in also letting her know about
  Sylvia。  That also might be good for her。
  They walked two blocks before Ann spoke。  Matthew; anticipating a
  pleasurable conversation; felt no desire to hasten matters。
  〃How intimate are you with him?〃 she demanded。  〃I don't think he
  would have said that to a mere acquaintance。〃
  〃I'm not a mere acquaintance;〃 said Matthew。  〃I've known him a long
  time。〃
  〃You never told me;〃 complained Ann。
  〃Didn't know it would interest you;〃 replied Matthew。
  He waited for further questions; but they did not come。  At Thirty…
  fourth Street he saved her from being run over and killed; and again
  at Forty…second Street。  Just inside the park she stopped abruptly
  and held out her hand。
  〃Tell him;〃 she replied; 〃that if he is really serious about finding
  Sylvia; I mayI don't say I canbut I may be able to help him。〃
  He did not take her hand; but stood stock still in the middle of the
  path and stared at her。
  〃You!〃 he said。  〃You know her?〃
  She was prepared for his surprise。  She was also preparednot with
  a lie; that implies evil intention。  Her only object was to have a
  talk with the gentleman and see what he was like before deciding on
  her future proceedingslet us say; with a plausible story。
  〃We crossed on the same boat;〃 she said。  〃We found there was a good
  deal in common between us。  Sheshe told me things。〃  When you came
  to think it out it was almost the truth。
  〃What is she like?〃 demanded Matthew。
  〃Oh; justwell; not exactly〃  It was an awkward question。  There
  came to her relief the reflection that there was really no need for
  her to answer it。
  〃What's it got to do with you?〃 she said。
  〃I am Aston Rowant;〃 said Matthew。
  The Central Park; together with the universe in general; fell away
  and disappeared。  Somewhere out of chaos was sounding a plaintive
  voice:  〃What is she like?  Can't you tell me?  Is she young or
  old?〃
  It seemed to have been going on for ages。  She made one supreme
  gigantic effort; causing the Central Park to reappear; dimly;
  faintly; but it was there again。  She was sitting on a seat。
  MatthewAston Rowant; whatever it waswas seated beside her。
  〃You've seen her?  What is she like?〃
  〃I can't tell you。〃
  He was evidently very cross with her。  It seemed so unkind of him。
  〃Why can't you tell meor; why won't you tell me?  Do you mean
  she's too awful for words?〃
  〃No; certainly notas a matter of fact〃
  〃Well; what?〃
  She felt she must get away or there would be hysterics somewhere。
  She sprang up and began to walk rapidly towards the gate。  He
  followed her。
  〃I'll write you;〃 said Ann。
  〃But why?〃
  〃I can't;〃 said Ann。  〃I've got a rehearsal。〃
  A car was passing。  She made a dash for it and clambered on。  Before
  he could make up his mind it had gathered speed。
  Ann let herself in with her key。  She called downstairs to the small
  servant that she wasn't to be disturbed for anything。  She locked
  the door。
  So it was to Matthew that for six years she had been pouring out her
  inmost thoughts and feelings!  It was to Matthew that she had laid
  bare her tenderest; most sacred dreams!  It was at Matthew's feet
  that for six years she had been sitting; gazing up with respectful
  admiration; with reverential devotion!  She recalled her letters;
  almost passage for passage; till she had to hold her hands to her
  face to cool it。  Her indignation; one might almost say fury; lasted
  till tea…time。
  In the eveningit was in the evening time that she had always
  written to hima more reasonable frame of mind asserted itself。
  After all; it was hardly his fault。  He couldn't have known who she
  was。  He didn't know now。  She had wanted to write。  Without doubt
  he had helped her; comforted her loneliness; had given her a
  charming friendship; a delightful comradeship。  Much of his work had
  been written for her; to her。  It was fine work。  She had been proud
  of her share in it。  Even allowing there were faultsirritability;
  shortness of temper; a tendency to bossiness!underneath it all was
  a man。  The gallant struggle; the difficulties overcome; the long
  suffering; the high courageall that she; reading between the
  lines; had divined of his life's battle!  Yes; it was a man she had
  worshipped。  A woman need not be ashamed of that。  As Matthew he had
  seemed to her conceited; priggish。  As Aston Rowant she wondered at
  his modesty; his patience。
  And all these years he had been dreaming of her; had followed her to
  New York; had
  There came a sudden mood so ludicrous; so absurdly unreasonable that
  Ann herself stopped to laugh at it。  Yet it was real; and it hurt。
  He had come to New York thinking of Sylvia; yearning for Sylvia。  He
  had come to New York with one desire:  to find Sylvia。  And the
  first pretty woman that had come across his path had sent Sylvia
  clean out of his head。  There could be no question of that。  When
  Ann Kavanagh stretched out her hand to him in that very room a
  fortnight ago he had stood before her dazzled; captured。  From that
  moment Sylvia had been tossed aside and forgotten。  Ann Kavanagh
  could have done what she liked with him。  She had quarrelled with
  him that evening of the concert。  She had meant to quarrel with him。
  And then for the first time he had remembered Sylvia。  That was her
  rewardSylvia's:  it was Sylvia she was thinking offor six years'
  devoted friendship; for the help; the inspiration she had given him。
  As Sylvia; she suffered from a very genuine and explainable wave of
  indignant jealousy。  As Ann; she admitted he ought not to have done
  it; but felt there was excuse for him。  Between the two she feared
  her mind would eventually give way。  On the morning of the second
  day she sent Matthew a note asking him to call in the afternoon。
  Sylvia might be there; or she might not。  She would mention it to
  her。
  She dressed herself in a quiet; dark…coloured frock。  It seemed
  uncommittal and suitable to the occasion。  It also happened to be
  the colour that best suited her。  She would not have the lamps
  lighted。
  Matthew arrived in a dark serge suit and a blue necktie; so that the
  general effect was quiet。  Ann greeted him with kindliness and put
  him with his face to what little light there was。  She chose for
  herself the window…seat。  Sylvia had not arrived。  She might be a
  little latethat is; if she came at all。
  They talked about the weather for a while。  Matthew was of opinion
  they were going to have some rain。  Ann; who was in one of her
  contradictory moods; thought there was frost in the air。
  〃What did you say to her?〃 he asked。
  〃Sylvia?  Oh; what you told me;〃 replied Ann。  〃That you had come to
  New York toto look for her。〃
  〃What did she say?〃 he asked。
  〃Said you'd taken your time about it;〃 retorted Ann。
  Matthew looked up with an injured expression。
  〃It was her own idea that we should never meet;〃 he explained。
  〃Um!〃 Ann grunted。
  〃What do you think yourself she will be like?〃 she continued。  〃Have
  you formed any notion?〃
  〃It is curious;〃 he replied。  〃I have never been able to conjure up
  any picture of her until just now。〃
  〃Why 'just now'?〃 demanded Ann。
  〃I had an idea I should find her here when I opened the door;〃 he
  answered。  〃You were standing in the shadow。  It seemed to be just
  what I had expected。〃
  〃You would have been satisfied?〃 she asked。
  〃Yes;〃 he said。
  There was silence for a moment。
  〃Uncle Ab made a mistake;〃 he continued。  〃He ought to have sent me
  away。  Let me come home now and then。〃
  〃You mean;〃 said Ann; 〃that if you had seen less of me you might
  have liked me better?〃
  〃Quite right;〃 he admitted。  〃We never see the things that are
  always there。〃
  〃A thin; gawky girl with a bad complexion;〃 she suggested。  〃Would
  it have been of any use?〃
  〃You must always have been wonderful with those eyes;〃 he answered。
  〃And your hands were beautiful even then。〃
  〃I used to cry sometimes when I looked at myself in the glass as a
  child;〃 she confessed。  〃My hands were the only thing that consoled
  me。〃
  〃I kissed them once;〃 he told her。  〃You were asleep; curled up in
  Uncle Ab's chair。〃
  〃I wasn't asleep;〃 said Ann。
  She was seated with one foot tucked underneath her。  She didn't look
  a bit grown up。
  〃You always thought me a fool;〃 he said。
  〃It used to make me so angry with you;〃 said Ann; 〃that you seemed
  to have no go; no ambition in you。  I wanted you to wake updo
  something。  If I had known you were a budding genius〃
  〃I did hint it to you;〃 said he。
  〃Oh; of course it was all my fault;〃 said Ann。
  He rose。  〃You think she means to come?〃 he asked。  Ann also had
  risen。
  〃Is she so very wonderful?〃 she asked。
  〃I may be exaggerating to myself;〃 he answered。  〃But I am not sure
  that I could go on with my work