第 10 节
作者:这就是结局      更新:2021-02-18 21:45      字数:9322
  he had left her presence in white…faced; stony…
  eyed misery after declaring his love for her; and
  learning of her engagement to Bertram。  Since
  then; she knew; he had been much with his old
  friend; Alice Greggory。  She did not believe;
  should she see him now; that he would be either
  white…faced; or stony…eyed。  His heart; she was
  sure; had gone where it ought to have gone in the
  first placeto Alice。  Such being; in her opinion;
  the case; she longed to get the embarrassment
  of a first meeting between themselves over
  with; for; after that; she was sure; their old
  friendship could be renewed; and she would be in a
  position to further this pretty love affair between
  him and Alice。  Very decidedly; therefore; Billy
  wished to meet Arkwright。  Very pleased; consequently;
  was she when; one day; coming into the
  living…room at the Annex; she found the man
  sitting by the fire。
  Arkwright was on his feet at once。
  ‘‘MissMrs。 HHenshaw;'' he stammered
  ‘‘Oh; Mr。 Arkwright;'' she cried; with just a
  shade of nervousness in her voice as she advanced;
  her hand outstretched。  ‘‘I'm glad to see you。''
  ‘‘Thank you。  I wanted to see Miss Greggory;''
  he murmured。  Then; as the unconscious rudeness
  of his reply dawned on him; he made matters
  infinitely worse by an attempted apology。  ‘‘That
  is; I meanI didn't mean'' he began to
  stammer miserably。
  Some girls might have tossed the floundering
  man a straw in the shape of a light laugh intended
  to turn aside all embarrassmentbut not Billy。
  Billy held out a frankly helping hand that was
  meant to set the man squarely on his feet at her
  side。
  ‘‘Mr。 Arkwright; don't; please;'' she begged
  earnestly。  ‘‘You and I don't need to beat about
  the bush。  I _am_ glad to see you; and I hope you're
  glad to see me。  We're going to be the best of
  friends from now on; I'm sure; and some day;
  soon; you're going to bring Alice to see me; and
  we'll have some music。  I left her up…stairs。  She'll
  be down at once; I dare sayI met Rosa going
  up with your card。  Good…by;'' she finished with
  a bright smile; as she turned and walked rapidly
  from the room。
  Outside; on the steps; Billy drew a long
  breath。
  ‘‘There;'' she whispered; ‘‘that's overand
  well over!''  The next minute she frowned vexedly。
  She had missed her glove。  ‘‘Never mind!
  I sha'n't go back in there for it now; anyway;''
  she decided。
  In the living…room; five minutes later; Alice
  Greggory found only a hastily scrawled note
  waiting for her。
  ‘‘If you'll forgive the unforgivable;'' she read
  ‘‘you'll forgive me for not being here when you
  come down。  ‘Circumstances over which I have
  no control have called me away。'  May we let
  it go at that?
  M。 J。 ARKWRIGHT。
  As Alice Greggory's amazed; questioning eyes
  left the note they fell upon the long white glove
  on the floor by the door。  Half mechanically she
  crossed the room and picked it up; but almost at
  once she dropped it with a low cry。
  ‘‘Billy!  HesawBilly!''  Then a flood
  of understanding dyed her face scarlet as she
  turned and fled to the blessedly unseeing walls
  of her own room。
  Not ten minutes later Rosa tapped at her door
  with a note。
  ‘‘It's from Mr。 Arkwright; Miss。  He's downstairs。''
  Rosa's eyes were puzzled; and a bit
  startled。
  ‘‘Mr。 Arkwright!''
  ‘‘Yes; Miss。  He's come again。  That is; I
  didn't know he'd wentbut he must have; for
  he's come again now。  He wrote something in a
  little book; then he tore it out and gave it to me。
  He said he'd wait; please; for an answer。''
  ‘‘Oh; very well; Rosa。''
  Miss Greggory took the note and spoke with
  an elaborate air of indifference that was meant to
  express a calm ignoring of the puzzled questioning
  in the other's eyes。  The next moment she read
  this in Arkwright's peculiar scrawl:
  ‘‘If you've already forgiven the unforgivable;
  you'll do it again; I know; and come down…stairs。
  Won't you; please?  I want to see you。''
  Miss Greggory lifted her head with a jerk。
  Her face was a painful red。
  ‘‘Tell Mr。 Arkwright I can't possibly''  She
  came to an abrupt pause。  Her eyes had encountered
  Rosa's; and in Rosa's eyes the puzzled questioning
  was plainly fast becoming a shrewd suspicion。
  There was the briefest of hesitations; then;
  lightly; Miss Greggory tossed the note aside。
  ‘‘Tell Mr。 Arkwright I'll be down at once;
  please;'' she directed carelessly; as she turned
  back into the room。
  But she was not down at once。  She was not
  down until she had taken time to bathe her red
  eyes; powder her telltale nose; smoothe her ruffled
  hair; and whip herself into the calm; steady…eyed;
  self…controlled young woman that Arkwright
  finally rose to meet when she came into the room。
  ‘‘I thought it was only women who were privileged
  to change their mind;'' she began brightly;
  but Arkwright ignored her attempt to conventionalize
  the situation。
  ‘‘Thank you for coming down;'' he said; with
  a weariness that instantly drove the forced smile
  from the girl's lips。  ‘‘II wanted toto talk
  to you。''
  ‘‘Yes?''  She seated herself and motioned him
  to a chair near her。  He took the seat; and then
  fell silent; his eyes out the window。
  ‘‘I thought you said youyou wanted to
  talk; she reminded him nervously; after a
  minute。
  ‘‘I did。''  He turned with disconcerting abruptness。
  ‘‘Alice; I'm going to tell you a story。''
  I shall be glad to listen。  People always like
  stories; don't they?''
  ‘‘Do they?''  The somber pain in Arkwright's
  eyes deepened。  Alice Greggory did not know it;
  but he was thinking of another story he had once
  told in that same room。  Billy was his listener
  then; while now  A little precipitately he began
  to speak。
  ‘‘When I was a very small boy I went to visit
  my uncle; who; in his young days; had been quite
  a hunter。  Before the fireplace in his library was
  a huge tiger skin with a particularly lifelike head。
  The first time I saw it I screamed; and ran and
  hid。  I refused then even to go into the room
  again。  My cousins urged; scolded; pleaded; and
  laughed at me by turns; but I was obdurate。  I
  would not go where I could see the fearsome thing
  again; even though it was; as they said; ‘nothing
  but a dead old rug!'
  ‘‘Finally; one day; my uncle took a hand in the
  matter。  By sheer will…power he forced me to go
  with him straight up to the dreaded creature; and
  stand by its side。  He laid one of my shrinking
  hands on the beast's smooth head; and thrust
  the other one quite into the open red mouth with
  its gleaming teeth。
  ‘‘ ‘You see;' he said; ‘there's absolutely nothing
  to fear。  He can't possibly hurt you。  Just as
  if you weren't bigger and finer and stronger in
  every way than that dead thing on the floor!'
  ‘‘Then; when he had got me to the point where
  of my own free will I would walk up and touch
  the thing; he drew a lesson for me。
  ‘‘ ‘Now remember;' he charged me。  ‘Never
  run and hide again。  Only cowards do that。
  Walk straight up and face the thing。  Ten to one
  you'll find it's nothing but a dead skin masquerading
  as the real thing。  Even if it isn't if it's
  aliveface it。  Find a weapon and fight it。
  Know that you are going to conquer it and
  you'll conquer。  Never run。  Be a man。  Men
  don't run; my boy!' ''
  Arkwright paused; and drew a long breath。  He
  did not look at the girl in the opposite chair。  If
  he had looked he would have seen a face transfigured。
  ‘‘Well;'' he resumed; ‘‘I never forgot that tiger
  skin; nor what it stood for; after that day when
  Uncle Ben thrust my hand into its hideous; but
  harmless; red mouth。  Even as a kid I began;
  then; to trynot to run。  I've tried ever since
  But to…dayI did run。''
  Arkwright's voice had been getting lower and
  lower。  The last three words would have been
  almost inaudible to ears less sensitively alert than
  were Alice Greggory's。  For a moment after the
  words were uttered; only the clock's ticking broke
  the silence; then; with an obvious effort; the man
  roused himself; as if breaking away from some
  benumbing force that held him。
  ‘‘Alice; I don't need to tell you; after what I
  said the other night; that I loved Billy Neilson。
  That was bad enough; for I found she was pledged
  to another man。  But to…day I discovered something
  worse:  I discovered that I loved Billy _Henshaw_
  another man's wife。  AndI ran。  But
  I've come back。  I'm going to face the thing。  Oh;
  I'm not deceiving myself!  This love of mine is
  no dead tiger skin。  It's a beast; alive and alert
  God pity me!to destroy my very soul。  But
  I'm going to fight it; andI want you to help
  me。''
  The girl gave a half…smothered cry。  The man
  turned; but he could not see her face distinctly。
  Twilight had come; and the room was full of
  sha