第 62 节
作者:泰达魔王      更新:2024-07-17 14:41      字数:9322
  did;) inferences injurious to my character might suggest themselves
  to him。  In admitting them; he gave proofs of less discernment and
  less candor than I once ascribed to him。〃
  〃His proofs;〃 said Wieland; after a considerable pause; 〃are
  different。  That he should be deceived is not possible。  That he
  himself is not the deceiver could not be believed; if his testimony
  were not inconsistent with yours; but the doubts which I
  entertained are now removed。  Your tale; some parts of it; is
  marvelous; the voice which exclaimed against your rashness in
  approaching the closet; your persisting; notwithstanding that
  prohibition; your belief that I was the ruffian; and your
  subsequent conduct; are believed by me; because I have known you
  from childhood; because a thousand instances have attested your
  veracity; and because nothing less than my own hearing and vision
  would convince me; in opposition to her own assertions; that my
  sister had fallen into wickedness like this。〃
  I threw my arms around him and bathed his cheek with my tears。
  〃That;〃 said I; 〃is spoken like my brother。  But what are the
  proofs?〃
  He replied; 〃Pleyel informed me that; in going to your house; his
  attention was attracted by two voices。  The persons speaking sat
  beneath the bank; out of sight。  These persons; judging by their
  voices; were Carwin and you。  I will not repeat the dialogue。  If
  my sister was the female; Pleyel was justified in concluding you to
  be indeed one of the most profligate of women。  Hence his
  accusations of you; and his efforts to obtain my concurrence to a
  plan by which an eternal separation should be brought about between
  my sister and this man。〃
  I made Wieland repeat this recital。  Here indeed was a tale to fill
  me with terrible foreboding。  I had vainly thought that my safety
  could be sufficiently secured by doors and bars; but this is a foe
  from whose grasp no power of divinity can save me!  His artifices
  will ever lay my fame and happiness at his mercy。  How shall I
  counterwork his plots or detect his coadjutor?  He has taught some
  vile and abandoned female to mimic my voice。  Pleyel's ears were
  the witnesses of my dishonor。  This is the midnight assignation to
  which he alluded。  Thus is the silence he maintained when
  attempting to open the door of my chamber; accounted for。  He
  supposed me absent; and meant; perhaps; had my apartment been
  accessible; to leave in it some accusing memorial。
  SECOND PART
  I
  'As this part opens; the unhappy Clara is describing her hurried
  return to the same ill…fated abode at Mettingen。  Hence kind
  friends had borne her after the catastrophe of her brother
  Wieland's 〃transformation。〃  This was the crowning horror of all:
  the morbid fanatic; prepared by gloomy anticipations of some
  terrible sacrifice to be demanded in the name of religion; had
  found himself goaded to blind fury; by a mysterious compelling
  voice; to yield up to God the lives of his beloved wife and family;
  and had done the awful deed!
  Though chained in his madhouse; he persists in his delusion;
  insists that it still remains for him to sacrifice his sister
  Clara; and twice breaks away in wild efforts to find and destroy
  her。'
  I took an irregular path which led me to my own house。  All was
  vacant and forlorn。  A small enclosure near which the path led was
  the burying ground belonging to the family。  This I was obliged to
  pass。  Once I had intended to enter it; and ponder on the emblems
  and inscriptions which my uncle had caused to be made on the tombs
  of Catharine and her children; but now my heart faltered as I
  approached; and I hastened forward that distance might conceal it
  from my view。
  When I approached the recess; my heart again sunk。  I averted my
  eyes; and left it behind me as quickly as possible。  Silence
  reigned through my habitation; and a darkness which closed doors
  and shutters produced。  Every object was connected with mine or my
  brother's history。  I passed the entry; mounted the stair; and
  unlocked the door of my chamber。  It was with difficulty that I
  curbed my fancy and smothered my fears。  Slight movements and
  casual sounds were transformed into beckoning shadows and calling
  shapes。
  I proceeded to the closet。  I opened and looked round it with
  fearfulness。  All things were in their accustomed order。  I sought
  and found the manuscript where I was used to deposit it。  This
  being secured; there was nothing to detain me; yet I stood and
  contemplated awhile the furniture and walls of my chamber。  I
  remembered how long this apartment had been a sweet and tranquil
  asylum; I compared its former state with its present dreariness;
  and reflected that I now beheld it for the last time。
  Here it was that the incomprehensible behavior of Carwin was
  witnessed; this the stage on which that enemy of man showed himself
  for a moment unmasked。  Here the menaces of murder were wafted to
  my ear; and here these menaces were executed。
  These thoughts had a tendency to take from me my self…command。  My
  feeble limbs refused to support me; and I sunk upon a chair。
  Incoherent and half…articulate exclamations escaped my lips。  The
  name of Carwin was uttered and eternal woeswoes like that which
  his malice had entailed upon uswere heaped upon him。  I invoked
  all…seeing heaven to drag to light and punish this betrayer; and
  accused its providence for having thus long delayed the retribution
  that was due to so enormous a guilt。
  I have said that the window shutters were closed。  A feeble light;
  however; found entrance through the crevices。  A small window
  illuminated the closet; and; the door being closed; a dim ray
  streamed through the keyhole。  A kind of twilight was thus created;
  sufficient for the purposes of vision; but; at the same time;
  involving all minuter objects in obscurity。
  This darkness suited the color of my thoughts。  I sickened at the
  remembrance of the past。  The prospect of the future excited my
  loathing。  I muttered; in a low voice; 〃Why should I live longer?
  Why should I drag a miserable being?  All for whom I ought to live
  have perished。  Am I not myself hunted to death?〃
  At that moment my despair suddenly became vigorous。  My nerves were
  no longer unstrung。  My powers; that had long been deadened; were
  revived。  My bosom swelled with a sudden energy; and the conviction
  darted through my mind; that to end my torments was; at once;
  practicable and wise。
  I knew how to find way to the recesses of life。  I could use a
  lancet with some skill; and could distinguish between vein and
  artery。  By piercing deep into the latter; I should shun the evils
  which the future had in store for me; and take refuge from my woes
  in quiet death。
  I started on my feet; for my feebleness was gone; and hasted to the
  closet。  A lancet and other small instruments were preserved in a
  case which I had deposited here。  Inattentive as I was to foreign
  considerations; my ears were still open to any sound of mysterious
  import that should occur。  I thought I heard a step in the entry。
  My purpose was suspended; and I cast an eager glance at my chamber
  door; which was open。  No one appeared; unless the shadow which I
  discerned upon the floor was the outline of a man。  If it were; I
  was authorized to suspect that some one was posted close to the
  entrance; who possibly had overheard my exclamations。
  My teeth chattered; and a wild confusion took the place of my
  momentary calm。  Thus it was when a terrific visage had disclosed
  itself on a former night。  Thus it was when the evil destiny of
  Wieland assumed the lineaments of something human。  What horrid
  apparition was preparing to blast my sight?
  Still I listened and gazed。  Not long; for the shadow moved; a
  foot; unshapely and huge; was thrust forward; a form advanced from
  its concealment; and stalked into the room。  It was Carwin!
  While I had breath; I shrieked。  While I had power over my muscles;
  I motioned with my hand that he should vanish。  My exertions could
  not last long: I sunk into a fit。
  Oh that this grateful oblivion had lasted forever!  Too quickly I
  recovered my senses。  The power of distinct vision was no sooner
  restored to me; than this hateful form again presented itself; and
  I once more relapsed。
  A second time; untoward nature recalled me from the sleep of death。
  I found myself stretched upon the bed。  When I had power to look
  up; I remembered only that I had cause to fear。  My distempered
  fancy fashioned to itself no distinguishable image。  I threw a
  languid glance round me: once more my eyes lighted upon Carwin。
  He was seated on the floor; his back rested against the wall; his
  knees were drawn up; and his face was buried in his hands。  That
  his station was at some distance; that his attitude was not
  menacing; that his ominous visage was concealed; may account for my
  now escaping a