第 58 节
作者:泰达魔王      更新:2024-07-17 14:41      字数:9322
  Twice have you been saved by his accursed interposition。  But for
  him I should long ere now have borne away the spoils of your
  honor。〃
  He looked at me with greater steadfastness than before。  I became
  every moment more anxious for my safety。  It was with difficulty I
  stammered out an entreaty that he would instantly depart; or suffer
  me to do so。  He paid no regard to my request; but proceeded in a
  more impassioned manner:
  〃What is it you fear?  Have I not told you you are safe?  Has not
  one in whom you more reasonably place trust assured you of it?
  Even if I execute my purpose; what injury is done?  Your prejudices
  will call it by that name; but it merits it not。
  〃I was impelled by a sentiment that does you honor; a sentiment
  that would sanctify my deed; but; whatever it be; you are safe。  Be
  this chimera still worshiped; I will do nothing to pollute it。〃
  There he stopped。
  The accents and gestures of this man left me drained of all
  courage。  Surely; on no other occasion should I have been thus
  pusillanimous。  My state I regarded as a hopeless one。  I was
  wholly at the mercy of this being。  Whichever way I turned my eyes;
  I saw no avenue by which I might escape。  The resources of my
  personal strength; my ingenuity; and my eloquence; I estimated at
  nothing。  The dignity of virtue and the force of truth I had been
  accustomed to celebrate; and had frequently vaunted of the
  conquests which I should make with their assistance。
  I used to suppose that certain evils could never befall a being in
  possession of a sound mind; that true virtue supplies us with
  energy which vice can never resist; that it was always in our power
  to obstruct; by his own death; the designs of an enemy who aimed at
  less than our life。  How was it that a sentiment like despair had
  now invaded me; and that I trusted to the protection of chance; or
  to the pity of my persecutor?
  His words imparted some notion of the injury which he had
  meditated。  He talked of obstacles that had risen in his way。  He
  had relinquished his design。  These sources supplied me with
  slender consolation。  There was no security but in his absence。
  When I looked at myself; when I reflected on the hour and the
  place; I was overpowered by horror and dejection。
  He was silent; museful; and inattentive to my situation; yet made
  no motion to depart。  I was silent in my turn。  What could I say?
  I was confident that reason in this contest would be impotent。  I
  must owe my safety to his own suggestions。  Whatever purpose
  brought him hither; he had changed it。  Why then did he remain?
  His resolutions might fluctuate; and the pause of a few minutes
  restore to him his first resolutions。
  Yet was not this the man whom we had treated with unwearied
  kindness? whose society was endeared to us by his intellectual
  elevation and accomplishments? who had a thousand times expatiated
  on the usefulness and beauty of virtue?  Why should such a one be
  dreaded?  If I could have forgotten the circumstances in which our
  interview had taken place; I might have treated his words as jests。
  Presently; he resumed:
  〃Fear me not: the space that severs us is small; and all visible
  succor is distant。  You believe yourself completely in my power;
  that you stand upon the brink of ruin。  Such are your groundless
  fears。  I cannot lift a finger to hurt you。  Easier would it be to
  stop the moon in her course than to injure you。  The power that
  protects you would crumble my sinews and reduce me to a heap of
  ashes in a moment; if I were to harbor a thought hostile to your
  safety。
  〃Thus are appearances at length solved。  Little did I expect that
  they originated hence。  What a portion is assigned to you!  Scanned
  by the eyes of this intelligence; your path will be without pits to
  swallow or snares to entangle you。  Environed by the arms of this
  protection; all artifices will be frustrated and all malice
  repelled。〃
  Here succeeded a new pause。  I was still observant of every gesture
  and look。  The tranquil solemnity that had lately possessed his
  countenance gave way to a new expression。  All now was trepidation
  and anxiety。
  〃I must be gone;〃 said he; in a faltering accent。  〃Why do I linger
  here?  I will not ask your forgiveness。  I see that your terrors
  are invincible。  Your pardon will be extorted by fear; and not
  dictated by compassion。  I must fly from you forever。  He that
  could plot against your honor must expect from you and your friends
  persecution and death。  I must doom myself to endless exile。〃
  Saying this; he hastily left the room。  I listened while he
  descended the stairs; and; unbolting the outer door; went forth。  I
  did not follow him with my eyes; as the moonlight would have
  enabled me to do。  Relieved by his absence; and exhausted by the
  conflict of my fears; I threw myself on a chair; and resigned
  myself to those bewildering ideas which incidents like these could
  not fail to produce。
  V
  Order could not readily be introduced into my thoughts。  The voice
  still rung in my ears。  Every accent that was uttered by Carwin was
  fresh in my remembrance。  His unwelcome approach; the recognition
  of his person; his hasty departure; produced a complex impression
  on my mind which no words can delineate。  I strove to give a slower
  motion to my thoughts; and to regulate a confusion which became
  painful; but my efforts were nugatory。  I covered my eyes with my
  hand; and sat; I know not how long; without power to arrange or
  utter my conceptions。
  I had remained for hours; as I believed; in absolute solitude。  No
  thought of personal danger had molested my tranquillity。  I had
  made no preparation for defense。  What was it that suggested the
  design of perusing my father's manuscript?  If; instead of this; I
  had retired to bed and to sleep; to what fate might I not have been
  reserved。  The ruffian; who must almost have suppressed his
  breathings to screen himself from discovery; would have noticed
  this signal; and I should have awakened only to perish with
  affright; and to abhor myself。  Could I have remained unconscious
  of my danger?  Could I have tranquilly slept in the midst of so
  deadly a snare?
  And who was he that threatened to destroy me?  By what means could
  he hide himself in this closet?  Surely he is gifted with
  supernatural power。  Such is the enemy of whose attempts I was
  forewarned。  Daily I had seen him and conversed with him。  Nothing
  could be discerned through the impenetrable veil of his duplicity。
  When busied in conjectures as to the author of the evil that was
  threatened; my mind did not light for a moment upon his image。  Yet
  has he not avowed himself my enemy?  Why should he be here if he
  had not meditated evil?
  He confesses that this has been his second attempt。  What was the
  scene of his former conspiracy?  Was it not he whose whispers
  betrayed him?  Am I deceived? or was there not a faint resemblance
  between the voice of this man and that which talked of grasping my
  throat and extinguishing my life in a moment?  Then he had a
  colleague in his crime; now he is alone。  Then death was the scope
  of his thoughts; now an injury unspeakably more dreadful。  How
  thankful should I be to the power that has interposed to save me!
  That power is invisible。  It is subject to the cognizance of one of
  my senses。  What are the means that will inform me of what nature
  it is?  He has set himself to counter…work the machinations of this
  man; who had menaced destruction to all that is dear to me; and
  whose coming had surmounted every human impediment。  There was none
  to rescue me from his grasp。  My rashness even hastened the
  completion of his scheme; and precluded him from the benefits of
  deliberation。  I had robbed him of the power to repent and forbear。
  Had I been apprised of the danger; I should have regarded my
  conduct as the means of rendering my escape from it impossible。
  Such; likewise; seem to have been the fears of my invisible
  protector。  Else why that startling entreaty to refrain from
  opening the closet?  By what inexplicable infatuation was I
  compelled to proceed?
  〃Surely;〃 said I; 〃there is omnipotence in the cause that changed
  the views of a man like Carwin。  The divinity that shielded me from
  his attempts will take suitable care of my future safety。  Thus to
  yield to my fears is to deserve that they should be real。〃
  Scarcely had I uttered these words; when my attention was startled
  by the sound of footsteps。  They denoted some one stepping into the
  piazza in front of my house。  My new…born confidence was
  extinguished in a moment。  Carwin; I thought; had repented his
  departure; and was hastily returning。  The possibility that his
  return was prompted by intentions consistent with my safety found
  no place in my mind。  Images of violation and murder assailed me
  anew; and the terrors which succeeded almost incapacitated me