第 3 节
作者:负债赌博      更新:2024-05-25 15:05      字数:9322
  quickly the light burst upon me with dazzling brightness; illuminating and
  explaining all that had been weird and uncanny and unnaturally impossible
  in   my    dream     experiences。     In  my    sleep    it  was   not   my    wake…a…day
  personality that took charge of me; it was another and distinct personality;
  possessing   a   new   and   totally   different   fund   of   experiences;   and;   to   the
  point    of  my   dreaming;     possessing     memories      of  those   totally   different
  experiences。
  What was this personality? When had it itself lived a wake…a…day life
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  on this planet in order to collect this fund of strange experiences? These
  were   questions   that   my   dreams   themselves   answered。          He   lived   in   the
  long ago; when the world was young; in that period that we call the Mid…
  Pleistocene。      He    fell  from    the  trees   but  did   not   strike  bottom。     He
  gibbered with fear at the roaring of the lions。            He was pursued by beasts
  of prey; struck at by deadly snakes。          He chattered with his kind in council;
  and he received rough usage at the hands of the Fire People in the day that
  he fled before them。
  But; I hear you objecting; why is it that these racial memories are not
  ours   as   well;   seeing   that   we   have   a   vague   other…personality   that   falls
  through space while we sleep?
  And I may answer with another question。               Why is a two…headed calf?
  And my own answer to this is that it is a freak。                And so I answer your
  question。       I   have    this  other…personality      and    these    complete     racial
  memories because I am a freak。
  But let me be more explicit。
  The   commonest   race   memory   we   have   is   the   falling…through…space
  dream。      This other…personality is very vague。           About the only memory it
  has is that of falling。      But many of us have sharper; more distinct other…
  personalities。     Many  of   us   have   the   flying   dream;   the   pursuing…monster
  dream;     color   dreams;    suffocation     dreams;    and   the   reptile  and   vermin
  dreams。      In short; while this other…personality is vestigial in all of us; in
  some     of  us   it  is  almost  obliterated;    while   in  others   of  us   it  is  more
  pronounced。 Some of us have stronger and completer race memories than
  others。
  It  is  all  a  question   of   varying   degree    of  possession     of  the   other…
  personality。      In   myself;    the  degree    of  possession     is  enormous。      My
  other…personality is almost equal in power with my own personality。                    And
  in this matter I am; as I said; a freaka freak of heredity。
  I do believe that it is the possession of this other…personalitybut not
  so strong a one as minethat has in some few others given rise to belief in
  personal reincarnation experiences。            It is very plausible to such people; a
  most convincing hypothesis。 When they have visions of scenes they have
  never seen in the flesh; memories of acts and events dating back in time;
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  the simplest explanation is that they have lived before。
  But they make the mistake of ignoring their own duality。                   They do not
  recognize their other…personality。            They think it is their own personality;
  that   they   have   only   one   personality;   and   from   such   a   premise   they   can
  conclude only that they have lived previous lives。
  But they are wrong。          It is not reincarnation。       I have visions of myself
  roaming through the forests of the Younger World; and yet it is not myself
  that I see but one that is only remotely a part of me; as my father and my
  grandfather   are   parts   of   me   less   remote。     This   other…self   of   mine   is   an
  ancestor;   a   progenitor   of   my   progenitors   in   the   early   line   of   my   race;
  himself the progeny of a line that long before his time developed fingers
  and toes and climbed up into the trees。
  I must again; at the risk of boring; repeat that I am; in this one thing; to
  be    considered     a  freak。    Not    alone    do   I  possess    racial  memory       to  an
  enormous   extent;   but   I   possess   the   memories   of   one   particular   and   far…
  removed progenitor。          And yet; while this is most unusual; there is nothing
  over…remarkable about it。
  Follow   my   reasoning。         An   instinct   is   a   racial   memory。   Very   good。
  Then you and I and all of us receive these memories from our fathers and
  mothers;       as   they    received     them     from     their   fathers     and    mothers。
  Therefore       there    must     be   a   medium       whereby      these    memories       are
  transmitted       from    generation      to   generation。       This     medium      is   what
  Weismann   terms   the   〃germplasm。〃   It   carries   the   memories   of   the   whole
  evolution of the race。         These memories are dim and confused; and many
  of   them   are   lost。   But   some   strains   of   germplasm   carry   an   excessive
  freightage   of   memoriesare;   to   be   scientific;   more   atavistic   than   other
  strains; and such a strain is mine。             I am a freak of heredity; an atavistic
  nightmarecall   me   what   you   will;   but   here   I   am;   real   and   alive;   eating
  three hearty meals a day; and what are you going to do about it?
  And now; before I take up my tale; I want to anticipate the doubting
  Thomases        of   psychology;      who     are   prone    to   scoff;   and   who     would
  otherwise surely say that the coherence of my dreams is due to overstudy
  and   the   subconscious   projection   of   my   knowledge   of   evolution   into   my
  dreams。       In   the   first  place;   I  have   never    been    a  zealous    student。     I
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  Before Adam
  graduated   last   of   my  class。     I   cared   more   for   athletics;   andthere   is   no
  reason I should not confess itmore for billiards。
  Further;     I  had   no   knowledge       of  evolution     until  I  was    at  college;
  whereas in my childhood and youth I had already lived in my dreams all
  the   details   of   that   other;   long…ago   life。  I   will   say;   however;   that   these
  details   were   mixed   and   incoherent   until   I   came   to   know   the   science   of
  evolution。      Evolution was the key。           It gave the explanation; gave sanity
  to   the   pranks   of   this   atavistic   brain   of   mine   that;   modern   and   normal;
  harked back to a past so remote as to be contemporaneous with the raw
  beginnings of mankind。
  For in this past I know of; man; as we to…day know him; did not exist。
  It was in the period of his becoming that I must have lived and had my
  being。
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  CHAPTER III
  The commonest dream of my early childhood was something like this:
  It seemed that I was very small and that I lay curled up in a sort of nest of
  twigs and boughs。 Sometimes I was lying on my back。 In this position it
  seemed   that   I   spent   many   hours;   watching   the   play   of   sunlight   on   the
  foliage and the   stirring of   the leaves by  the   wind。        Often   the nest   itself
  moved back and forth when the wind was strong。
  But    always;    while    so   lying   in  the   nest;   I  was   mastered     as   of
  tremendous   space   beneath   me。        I   never   saw   it;   I   never   peered   over   the
  edge of the nest to see; but I KNEW and feared that space that lurked just
  beneath me and that ever threatened me like a maw of some all…devouring
  monster。
  This   dream;   in   which   I   was   quiescent   and   which   was   more   like   a
  condition than an experience of action; I dreamed very often in my early
  childhood。      But    suddenly;    there   would    rush   into  the  very   midst    of  it
  strange forms and ferocious happenings; the thunder and crashing of storm;
  or unfamiliar landscapes such as in my wake…a…day life I had never seen。
  The result was confusion and nightmare。              I could comprehend nothing of
  it。   There was no logic of sequence。
  You   see;   I   did   not   dream   consecutively。  One   moment   I   was   a   wee
  babe of the Younger World lying in my tree nes