An　Old　Maid
  by　Honore　de　Balzac
  Translated　by　Katharine　Prescott　Wormeley
  DEDICATION
  To　Monsieur　Eugene…Auguste…Georges…Louis　Midy　de　la　Greneraye
  Surville；　Royal　Engineer　of　the　Ponts　at　Chausses。
  As　a　testimony　to　the　affection　of　his　brother…in…law；
  De　Balzac
  AN　OLD　MAID
  CHAPTER　I
  ONE　OF　MANY　CHEVALIERS　DE　VALOIS
  Most　persons　have　encountered；　in　certain　provinces　in　France；　a
  number　of　Chevaliers　de　Valois。　One　lived　in　Normandy；　another　at
  Bourges；　a　third　（with　whom　we　have　here　to　do）　flourished　in　Alencon；
  and　doubtless　the　South　possesses　others。　The　number　of　the　Valesian
  tribe　is；　however；　of　no　consequence　to　the　present　tale。　All　these
  chevaliers；　among　whom　were　doubtless　some　who　were　Valois　as　Louis
  XIV。　was　Bourbon；　knew　so　little　of　one　another　that　it　was　not
  advisable　to　speak　to　one　about　the　others。　They　were　all　willing　to
  leave　the　Bourbons　in　tranquil　possession　of　the　throne　of　France；　for
  it　was　too　plainly　established　that　Henri　IV。　became　king　for　want　of
  a　male　heir　in　the　first　Orleans　branch　called　the　Valois。　If　there
  are　any　Valois；　they　descend　from　Charles　de　Valois；　Duc　d'Angouleme；
  son　of　Charles　IX。　and　Marie　Touchet；　the　male　line　from　whom　ended；
  until　proof　to　the　contrary　be　produced；　in　the　person　of　the　Abbe　de
  Rothelin。　The　Valois…Saint…Remy；　who　descended　from　Henri　II。；　also
  came　to　an　end　in　the　famous　Lamothe…Valois　implicated　in　the　affair
  of　the　Diamond　Necklace。
  Each　of　these　many　chevaliers；　if　we　may　believe　reports；　was；　like
  the　Chevalier　of　Alencon；　an　old　gentleman；　tall；　thin；　withered；　and
  moneyless。　He　of　Bourges　had　emigrated；　he　of　Touraine　hid　himself；　he
  of　Alencon　fought　in　La　Vendee　and　〃chouanized〃　somewhat。　The　youth　of
  the　latter　was　spend　in　Paris；　where　the　Revolution　overtook　him　when
  thirty　years　of　age　in　the　midst　of　his　conquests　and　gallantries。
  The　Chevalier　de　Valois　of　Alencon　was　accepted　by　the　highest
  aristocracy　of　the　province　as　a　genuine　Valois；　and　he　distinguished
  himself；　like　the　rest　of　his　homonyms；　by　excellent　manners；　which
  proved　him　a　man　of　society。　He　dined　out　every　day；　and　played　cards
  every　evening。　He　was　thought　witty；　thanks　to　his　foible　for　relating
  a　quantity　of　anecdotes　on　the　reign　of　Louis　XV。　and　the　beginnings
  of　the　Revolution。　When　these　tales　were　heard　for　the　first　time；
  they　were　held　to　be　well　narrated。　He　had；　moreover；　the　great　merit
  of　not　repeating　his　personal　bons　mots　and　of　never　speaking　of　his
  love…affairs；　though　his　smiles　and　his　airs　and　graces　were
  delightfully　indiscreet。　The　worthy　gentleman　used　his　privilege　as　a
  Voltairean　noble　to　stay　away　from　mass；　and　great　indulgence　was
  shown　to　his　irreligion　because　of　his　devotion　to　the　royal　cause。
  One　of　his　particular　graces　was　the　air　and　manner　（imitated；　no
  doubt；　from　Mole）　with　which　he　took　snuff　from　a　gold　box　adorned
  with　the　portrait　of　the　Princess　Goritza；a　charming　Hungarian；
  celebrated　for　her　beauty　in　the　last　years　of　the　reign　of　Louis　XV。
  Having　been　attached　during　his　youth　to　that　illustrious　stranger；　he
  still　mentioned　her　with　emotion。　For　her　sake　he　had　fought　a　duel
  with　Monsieur　de　Lauzun。
  The　chevalier；　now　fifty…eight　years　of　age；　owned　to　only　fifty；　and
  he　might　well　allow　himself　that　innocent　deception；　for；　among　the
  other　advantages　granted　to　fair　thin　persons；　he　managed　to　preserve
  the　still　youthful　figure　which　saves　men　as　well　as　women　from　an
  appearance　of　old　age。　Yes；　remember　this：　all　of　life；　or　rather　all
  the　elegance　that　expresses　life；　is　in　the　figure。　Among　the
  chevalier's　other　possessions　must　be　counted　an　enormous　nose　with
  which　nature　had　endowed　him。　This　nose　vigorously　divided　a　pale　face
  into　two　sections　which　seemed　to　have　no　knowledge　of　each　other；　for
  one　side　would　redden　under　the　process　of　digestion；　while　the　other
  continued　white。　This　fact　is　worthy　of　remark　at　a　period　when
  physiology　is　so　busy　with　the　human　heart。　The　incandescence；　so　to
  call　it；　was　on　the　left　side。　Though　his　long　slim　legs；　supporting　a
  lank　body；　and　his　pallid　skin；　were　not　indicative　of　health；
  Monsieur　de　Valois　ate　like　an　ogre　and　declared　he　had　a　malady
  called　in　the　provinces　〃hot　liver；〃　perhaps　to　excuse　his　monstrous
  appetite。　The　circumstance　of　his　singular　flush　confirmed　this
  declaration；　but　in　a　region　where　repasts　are　developed　on　the　line
  of　thirty　or　forty　dishes　and　last　four　hours；　the　chevalier's　stomach
  would　seem　to　have　been　a　blessing　bestowed　by　Providence　on　the　good
  town　of　Alencon。　According　to　certain　doctors；　heat　on　the　left　side
  denotes　a　prodigal　heart。　The　chevalier's　gallantries　confirmed　this
  scientific　assertion；　the　responsibility　for　which　does　not　rest；
  fortunately；　on　the　historian。
  In　spite　of　these　symptoms；　Monsieur　de　Valois'　constitution　was
  vigorous；　consequently　long…lived。　If　his　liver　〃heated；〃　to　use　an
  old…fashioned　word；　his　heart　was　not　less　inflammable。　His　face　was
  wrinkled　and　his　hair　silvered；　but　an　intelligent　observer　would　have
  recognized　at　once　the　stigmata　of　passion　and　the　furrows　of　pleasure
  which　appeared　in　the　crow's…feet　and　the　marches…du…palais；　so　prized
  at　the　court　of　Cythera。　Everything　about　this　dainty　chevalier
  bespoke　the　〃ladies'　man。〃　He　was　so　minute　in　his　ablutions　that　his
  cheeks　were　a　pleasure　to　look　upon；　they　seemed　to　have　been　laved　in
  some　miraculous　water。　The　part　of　his　skull　which　his　hair　refused　to
  cover　shone　like　ivory。　His　eyebrows；　like　his　hair；　affected　youth　by
  the　care　and　regularity　with　which　they　were　combed。　His　skin；　already
  white；　seemed　to　have　been　extra…whitened　by　some　secret　compound。
  Without　using　perfumes；　the　chevalier　exhaled　a　certain　fragrance　of
  youth；　that　refreshed　the　atmosphere。　His　hands；　which　were　those　of　a
  gentleman；　and　were　cared　for　like　the　hands　of　a　pretty　woman；
  attracted　the　eye　to　their　rosy；　well…shaped　nails。　In　short；　had　it
  not　been　for　his　magisterial　and　stupendous　nose；　the　chevalier　might
  have　been　thought　a　trifle　too　dainty。
  We　must　here　compel　ourselves　to　spoil　this　portrait　by　the　avowal　of
  a　littleness。　The　chevalier　put　cotton　in　his　ears；　and　wore；　appended
  to　them；　two　little　ear…rings　representing　negroes'　heads　in　diamonds；
  of　admirable　workmanship。　He　clung　to　these　singular　appendages；
  explaining　that　since　his　ears　had　been　bored　he　had　ceased　to　have
  headaches　（he　had　had　headaches）。　We　do　not　present　the　chevalier　as
  an　accomplished　man；　but　surely　we　can　pardon；　in　an　old　celibate
  whose　heart　sends　so　much　blood　to　his　left　cheek；　these　adorable
  qualities；　founded；　perhaps；　on　some　sublime　secret　history。
  Besides；　the　Chevalier　de　Valois　redeemed　those　negroes'　heads　by　so
  many　other　graces　that　society　felt　itself　sufficiently　compensated。
  He　really　took　such　immense　trouble　to　conceal　his　age　and　give
  pleasure　to　his　friends。　In　the　first　place；　we　must　call　attention　to
  the　extreme　care　he　gave　to　his　linen；　the　only　distinction　that　well…
  bred　men　can　nowadays　exhibit　in　their　clothes。　The　linen　of　the
  chevalier　was　invariably　of　a　fineness　and　whiteness　that　were　truly
  aristocratic。　As　for　his　coat；　though　remarkable　for　its　cleanliness；
  it　was　always　half　worn…out；　but　without　spots　or　creases。　The
  preservation　of　that　garment　was　something　marvellous　to　those　who
  noticed　the　chevalier's　high…bred　indifference　to　its　shabbiness。　He
  did　not　go　so　far　as　to　scrape　the　seams　with　glass；a　refinement
  invented　by　the　Prince　of　Wales；　but　he　did　practice　the　rudiments　of
  English　elegance　with　a　personal　satisfaction　little　understood　by　the
  people　of　Alencon。　The　world　owes　a　great　deal　to　persons　who　take
  such　pains　to　please　it。　In　this　there　is　certainly　some
  accomplishment　of　that　most　difficult　precept　of　the　Gospel　about
  rendering　good　for　evil。　This　freshness　of　ablution　and　all　the　other
  little　cares　harmonized　charmingly　with　the　blue　eyes；　the　ivory
  teeth；　and　the　blond　person　of　the　old　chevalier。
  The　only　blemish　was　that　this　retired　Adonis　had　nothing　manly　about
  him；　he　seemed　to　be　employing　this　toilet　varnish　to　hide　the　ruins
  occasioned　by　the　military　service　of　gallantry　only。　But　we　must
  hasten　to　add　that　his　voice　produced　what　might　be　called　an
  antithesis　to　his　blond　delicacy。　Unless　you　adopted　the　opinion　of
  certain　observers　of　the　human　heart；　and　thought　that　the　chevalier
  had　the　voice　of　his　nose；　his　organ　of　speech　would　have　amazed　you
  by　its　full　and　redundant　sound。　Without　possessing　the　volume　of
  classical　bass　voices；　the　tone　of　it　was　pleasing　from　a　slightly
  muffled　quality　like　that　of　an　English　bugle；　which　is　firm　and
  sweet；　strong　but　velvety。
  The　chevalier　had　repudiated　the　ridiculous　costume　still　preserved　by
  certain　monarchical　old　men；　he　had　frankly　mod