第 162 节
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温暖寒冬 更新:2024-04-09 19:50 字数:9171
and make no home for herself i’ this world。”
“But suppose;” said Adam; earnestly; “suppose there was a
man as ’ud let her do just the same and not interfere with her—she
might do a good deal o’ what she does now; just as well when she
was married as when she was single。 Other women of her sort
have married—that’s to say; not just like her; but women as
preached and attended on the sick and needy。 There’s Mrs。
Fletcher as she talks of。”
A new light had broken in on Seth。 He turned round; and laying
his hand on Adam’s shoulder; said; “Why; wouldst like her to
marry thee; Brother?”
Adam looked doubtfully at Seth’s inquiring eyes and said;
“Wouldst be hurt if she was to be fonder o’ me than o’ thee?”
“Nay;” said Seth warmly; “how canst think it? Have I felt thy
trouble so little that I shouldna feel thy joy?”
There was silence a few moments as they walked on; and then
Seth said; “I’d no notion as thee’dst ever think of her for a wife。”
“But is it o’ any use to think of her?” said Adam。 “What dost
say? Mother’s made me as I hardly know where I am; with what
she’s been saying to me this forenoon。 She says she’s sure Dinah
feels for me more than common; and ’ud be willing t’ have me。 But
I’m afraid she speaks without book。 I want to know if thee’st seen
anything。”
“It’s a nice point to speak about;” said Seth; “and I’m afraid o’
being wrong; besides; we’ve no right t’ intermeddle with people’s
feelings when they wouldn’t tell ’em themselves。”
Seth paused。
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“But thee mightst ask her;” he said presently。 “She took no
offence at me for asking; and thee’st more right than I had; only
thee ’t not in the Society。 But Dinah doesn’t hold wi’ them as are
for keeping the Society so strict to themselves。 She doesn’t mind
about making folks enter the Society; so as they’re fit t’ enter the
kingdom o’ God。 Some o’ the brethren at Treddles’on are
displeased with her for that。”
“Where will she be the rest o’ the day?” said Adam。
“She said she shouldn’t leave the farm again to…day;” said Seth;
“because it’s her last Sabbath there; and she’s going t’ read out o’
the big Bible wi’ the children。”
Adam thought—but did not say—“Then I’ll go this afternoon;
for if I go to church; my thoughts ’ull be with her all the while。
They must sing th’ anthem without me to…day。”
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Chapter LII
Adam and Dinah
t was about three o’clock when Adam entered the farmyard
Iand roused Alick and the dogs from their Sunday dozing。
Alick said everybody was gone to church “but th’ young
missis”—so he called Dinah—but this did not disappoint Adam;
although the “everybody” was so liberal as to include Nancy the
dairymaid; whose works of necessity were not unfrequently
incompatible with church…going。
There was perfect stillness about the house。 The doors were all
closed; and the very stones and tubs seemed quieter than usual。
Adam heard the water gently dripping from the pump—that was
the only sound—and he knocked at the house door rather softly; as
was suitable in that stillness。
The door opened; and Dinah stood before him; colouring deeply
with the great surprise of seeing Adam at this hour; when she
knew it was his regular practice to be at church。 Yesterday he
would have said to her without any difficulty; “I came to see you;
Dinah: I knew the rest were not at home。” But to…day something
prevented him from saying that; and he put out his hand to her in
silence。 Neither of them spoke; and yet both wished they could
speak; as Adam entered; and they sat down。 Dinah took the chair
she had just left; it was at the corner of the table near the window;
and there was a book lying on the table; but it was not open。 She
had been sitting perfectly still; looking at the small bit of clear fire
in the bright grate。 Adam sat down opposite her; in Mr。 Poyser’s
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three…cornered chair。
“Your mother is not ill again; I hope; Adam?” Dinah said;
recovering herself。 “Seth said she was well this morning。”
“No; she’s very hearty to…day;” said Adam; happy in the signs of
Dinah’s feeling at the sight of him; but shy。
“There’s nobody at home; you see;” Dinah said; “but you’ll wait。
You’ve been hindered from going to church to…day; doubtless。”
“Yes;” Adam said; and then paused; before he added; “I was
thinking about you: that was the reason。”
This confession was very awkward and sudden; Adam felt; for
he thought Dinah must understand all he meant。 But the
frankness of the words caused her immediately to interpret them
into a renewal of his brotherly regrets that she was going away;
and she answered calmly; “Do not be careful and troubled for me;
Adam。 I have all things and abound at Snowfield。 And my mind is
at rest; for I am not seeking my own will in going。”
“But if things were different; Dinah;” said Adam; hesitatingly。
“If you knew things that perhaps you don’t know now 。 。 。 ”
Dinah looked at him inquiringly; but instead of going on; he
reached a chair and brought it near the corner of the table where
she was sitting。 She wondered; and was afraid—and the next
moment her thoughts flew to the past: was it something about
those distant unhappy ones that she didn’t know?
Adam looked at her。 It was so sweet to look at her eyes; which
had now a self…forgetful questioning in them—for a moment he
forgot that he wanted to say anything; or that it was necessary to
tell her what he meant。
“Dinah;” he said suddenly; taking both her hands between his;
“I love you with my whole heart and soul。 I love you next to God
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who made me。”
Dinah’s lips became pale; like her cheeks; and she trembled
violently under the shock of painful joy。 Her hands were cold as
death between Adam’s。 She could not draw them away; because
he held them fast。
“Don’t tell me you can’t love me; Dinah。 Don’t tell me we must
part and pass our lives away from one another。”
The tears were trembling in Dinah’s eyes; and they fell before
she could answer。 But she spoke in a quiet low voice。
“Yes; dear Adam; we must submit to another Will。 We must
part。”
“Not if you love me; Dinah—not if you love me;” Adam said
passionately。 “Tell me—tell me if you can love me better than a
brother?”
Dinah was too entirely reliant on the Supreme guidance to
attempt to achieve any end by a deceptive concealment。 She was
recovering now from the first shock of emotion; and she looked at
Adam with simple sincere eyes as she said; “Yes; Adam; my heart
is drawn strongly towards you; and of my own will; if I had no
clear showing to the contrary; I could find my happiness in being
near you and ministering to you continually。 I fear I should forget
to rejoice and weep with others; nay; I fear I should forget the
Divine presence; and seek no love but yours。”
Adam did not speak immediately。 They sat looking at each
other in delicious silence—for the f