第 23 节
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baking them。 But luck appeared to be against him。 A volcano shoved
itself through there that night; and elevated his brickyard about two
thousand feet in the air。 It irritated him a good deal。 He has been up
there; and he says the bricks are all baked right enough; but he can't
get them down。 At first; he thought maybe the government would get the
bricks down for him; because since government bought the island; it ought
to protect the property where a man has invested in good faith; but all
he wants is quiet; and so he is not going to apply for the subsidy he was
thinking about。
He went back there last week in a couple of ships of war; to prospect
around the coast for a safe place for a farm where he could be quiet;
but a great 〃tidal wave〃 came; and hoisted both of the ships out into one
of the interior counties; and he came near losing his life。 So he has
given up prospecting in a ship; and is discouraged。
Well; now he don't know what to do。 He has tried Alaska; but the bears
kept after him so much; and kept him so much on the jump; as it were;
that he had to leave the country。 He could not be quiet there with those
bears prancing after him all the time。 That is how he came to go to the
new island we have boughtSt。 Thomas。 But he is getting to think St。
Thomas is not quiet enough for a man of his turn of mind; and that is why
he wishes me to find out if government is likely to buy some more islands
shortly。 He has heard that government is thinking about buying Porto
Rico。 If that is true; he wishes to try Porto Rico; if it is a quiet
place。 How is Porto Rico for his style of man? Do you think the
government will buy it?
SOME LEARNED FABLES; FOR GOOD OLD BOYS AND GIRLS
IN THREE PARTS
PART FIRST
HOW THE ANIMALS OF THE WOOD SENT OUT A SCIENTIFIC EXPEDITION
Once the creatures of the forest held a great convention and appointed a
commission consisting of the most illustrious scientists among them to go
forth; clear beyond the forest and out into the unknown and unexplored
world; to verify the truth of the matters already taught in their schools
and colleges and also to make discoveries。 It was the most imposing
enterprise of the kind the nation had ever embarked in。 True; the
government had once sent Dr。 Bull Frog; with a picked crew; to hunt for a
northwesterly passage through the swamp to the right…hand corner of the
wood; and had since sent out many expeditions to hunt for Dr。 Bull Frog;
but they never could find him; and so government finally gave him up and
ennobled his mother to show its gratitude for the services her son had
rendered to science。 And once government sent Sir Grass Hopper to hunt
for the sources of the rill that emptied into the swamp; and afterward
sent out many expeditions to hunt for Sir Grass; and at last they were
successfulthey found his body; but if he had discovered the sources
meantime; he did not let on。 So government acted handsomely by deceased;
and many envied his funeral。
But these expeditions were trifles compared with the present one; for
this one comprised among its servants the very greatest among the
learned; and besides it was to go to the utterly unvisited regions
believed to lie beyond the mighty forestas we have remarked before。
How the members were banqueted; and glorified; and talked about!
Everywhere that one of them showed himself; straightway there was a crowd
to gape and stare at him。
Finally they set off; and it was a sight to see the long procession of
dry…land Tortoises heavily laden with savants; scientific instruments;
Glow…Worms and Fire…Flies for signal service; provisions; Ants and
Tumble…Bugs to fetch and carry and delve; Spiders to carry the surveying
chain and do other engineering duty; and so forth and so on; and after
the Tortoises came another long train of ironcladsstately and spacious
Mud Turtles for marine transportation service; and from every Tortoise
and every Turtle flaunted a flaming gladiolus or other splendid banner;
at the head of the column a great band of Bumble…Bees; Mosquitoes;
Katy…Dids; and Crickets discoursed martial music; and the entire train
was under the escort and protection of twelve picked regiments of the
Army Worm。
At the end of three weeks the expedition emerged from the forest and
looked upon the great Unknown World。 Their eyes were greeted with an
impressive spectacle。 A vast level plain stretched before them; watered
by a sinuous stream; and beyond there towered up against the sky along
and lofty barrier of some kind; they did not know what。 The Tumble…Bug
said he believed it was simply land tilted up on its edge; because he
knew he could see trees on it。 But Professor Snail and the others said:
〃You are hired to dig; sirthat is all。 We need your muscle; not your
brains。 When we want your opinion on scientific matters; we will hasten
to let you know。 Your coolness is intolerable; tooloafing about here
meddling with august matters of learning; when the other laborers are
pitching camp。 Go along and help handle the baggage。〃
The Tumble…Bug turned on his heel uncrushed; unabashed; observing to
himself; 〃If it isn't land tilted up; let me die the death of the
unrighteous。〃
Professor Bull Frog (nephew of the late explorer) said he believed the
ridge was the wall that inclosed the earth。 He continued:
〃Our fathers have left us much learning; but they had not traveled far;
and so we may count this a noble new discovery。 We are safe for renown
now; even though our labors began and ended with this single achievement。
I wonder what this wall is built of? Can it be fungus? Fungus is an
honorable good thing to build a wall of。〃
Professor Snail adjusted his field…glass and examined the rampart
critically。 Finally he said:
〃'The fact that it is not diaphanous convinces me that it is a dense
vapor formed by the calorification of ascending moisture dephlogisticated
by refraction。 A few endiometrical experiments would confirm this; but
it is not necessary。 The thing is obvious。〃
So he shut up his glass and went into his shell to make a note of the
discovery of the world's end; and the nature of it。
〃Profound mind!〃 said Professor Angle…Worm to Professor Field…Mouse;
〃profound mind! nothing can long remain a mystery to that august brain。〃
Night drew on apace; the sentinel crickets were posted; the Glow…Worm and
Fire…Fly lamps were lighted; and the camp sank to silence and sleep。
After breakfast in the morning; the expedition moved on。 About noon a
great avenue was reached; which had in it two endless parallel bars of
some kind of hard black substance; raised the height of the tallest Bull
Frog; above the general level。 The scientists climbed up on these and
examined and tested them in various ways。 They walked along them for a
great distance; but found no end and no break in them。 They could arrive
at no decision。 There was nothing in the records of science that
mentioned anything of this kind。 But at last the bald and venerable
geographer; Professor Mud Turtle; a person who; born poor; and of a
drudging low family; had; by his own native force raised himself to the
headship of the geographers of his generation; said:
〃'My friends; we have indeed made a discovery here。 We have found in a
palpable; compact; and imperishable state what the wisest of our fathers
always regarded as a mere thing of the imagination。 Humble yourselves;
my friends; for we stand in a majestic presence。 These are parallels of
latitude!〃
Every heart and every head was bowed; so awful; so sublime was the
magnitude of the discovery。 Many shed tears。
The camp was pitched and the rest of the day given up to writing
voluminous accounts of the marvel; and correcting astronomical tables to
fit it。 Toward midnight a demoniacal shriek was heard; then a clattering
and rumbling noise; and the next instant a vast terrific eye shot by;
with a long tail attached; and disappeared in the gloom; still uttering
triumphant shrieks。
The poor damp laborers were stricken to the heart with fright; and
stampeded for the high grass in a body。 But not the scientists。 They
had no superstitions。 They calmly proceeded to exchange theories。
The ancient geographer's opinion was asked。 He went into his shell and
deliberated long and profoundly。 When he came out at last; they all knew
by his worshiping countenance that he brought light。 Said he:
〃Give thanks for this stupendous thing which we have been permitted to
witness。 It is the Vernal Equinox!〃
There were shoutings and great rejoicings。
〃But;〃 said the Angle…Worm; uncoiling after reflection; 〃this is dead
summer…time。〃
〃Very well;〃 said the Turtle; 〃we are far from our region; the season
differs with the difference of time between the two points。〃
〃Ah; true: True enough。 But it is night。 How should the sun pass in
the night?〃
〃In these distant regions he doubtless passes always in the night at this
hour。〃
〃Yes; doubtless that is true。 But it being night; how is it that we
could see him?〃
〃It is a great mystery。 I grant that。 But I am persuaded that the
humidity of the atmosphere in these remote regio