第 33 节
作者:
这就是结局 更新:2023-05-17 13:24 字数:9322
n in this generation? An outflush of foolish young Enthusiasm; like the first fallow…crop; wherein are as many weeds as valuable herbs: this all parched away; under the Droughts of practical and spiritual Unbelief; as Disappointment; in thought and act; often…repeated gave rise to Doubt; and Doubt gradually settled into Denial! If I have had a second…crop; and now see the perennial greensward; and sit under umbrageous cedars; which defy all Drought (and Doubt); herein too; be the Heavens praised; I am not without examples; and even exemplars。〃
So that; for Teufelsdrockh; also; there has been a 〃glorious revolution:〃 these mad shadow…hunting and shadow…hunted Pilgrimings of his were but some purifying 〃Temptation in the Wilderness;〃 before his apostolic work (such as it was) could begin; which Temptation is now happily over; and the Devil once more worsted! Was 〃that high moment in the _Rue de l'Enfer_;〃 then; properly the turning…point of the battle; when the Fiend said; _Worship me; or be torn in shreds_; and was answered valiantly with an _Apage Satana_?Singular Teufelsdrockh; would thou hadst told thy singular story in plain words! But it is fruitless to look there; in those Paper…bags; for such。 Nothing but innuendoes; figurative crotchets: a typical Shadow; fitfully wavering; prophetico…satiric; no clear logical Picture。 〃How paint to the sensual eye;〃 asks he once; 〃what passes in the Holy…of…Holies of Man's Soul; in what words; known to these profane times; speak even afar…off of the unspeakable?〃 We ask in turn: Why perplex these times; profane as they are; with needless obscurity; by omission and by commission? Not mystical only is our Professor; but whimsical; and involves himself; now more than ever; in eye…bewildering _chiaroscuro_。 Successive glimpses; here faithfully imparted; our more gifted readers must endeavor to combine for their own behoof。
He says: 〃The hot Harmattan wind had raged itself out; its howl went silent within me; and the long…deafened soul could now hear。 I paused in my wild wanderings; and sat me down to wait; and consider; for it was as if the hour of change drew nigh。 I seemed to surrender; to renounce utterly; and say: Fly; then; false shadows of Hope; I will chase you no more; I will believe you no more。 And ye too; haggard spectres of Fear; I care not for you; ye too are all shadows and a lie。 Let me rest here: for I am way…weary and life…weary; I will rest here; were it but to die: to die or to live is alike to me; alike insignificant。〃And again: 〃Here; then; as I lay in that CENTRE OF INDIFFERENCE; cast; doubtless by benignant upper Influence; into a healing sleep; the heavy dreams rolled gradually away; and I awoke to a new Heaven and a new Earth。 The first preliminary moral Act; Annihilation of Self (_Selbst…todtung_); had been happily accomplished; and my mind's eyes were now unsealed; and its hands ungyved。〃
Might we not also conjecture that the following passage refers to his Locality; during this same 〃healing sleep;〃 that his Pilgrim…staff lies cast aside here; on 〃the high table…land;〃 and indeed that the repose is already taking wholesome effect on him? If it were not that the tone; in some parts; has more of riancy; even of levity; than we could have expected! However; in Teufelsdrockh; there is always the strangest Dualism: light dancing; with guitar…music; will be going on in the fore…court; while by fits from within comes the faint whimpering of woe and wail。 We transcribe the piece entire。
〃Beautiful it was to sit there; as in my skyey Tent; musing and meditating; on the high table…land; in front of the Mountains; over me; as roof; the azure Dome; and around me; for walls; four azure…flowing curtains;namely; of the Four azure Winds; on whose bottom…fringes also I have seen gilding。 And then to fancy the fair Castles that stood sheltered in these Mountain hollows; with their green flower…lawns; and white dames and damosels; lovely enough: or better still; the straw…roofed Cottages; wherein stood many a Mother baking bread; with her children round her:all hidden and protectingly folded up in the valley…folds; yet there and alive; as sure as if I beheld them。 Or to see; as well as fancy; the nine Towns and Villages; that lay round my mountain…seat; which; in still weather; were wont to speak to me (by their steeple…bells) with metal tongue; and; in almost all weather; proclaimed their vitality by repeated Smoke…clouds; whereon; as on a culinary horologe; I might read the hour of the day。 For it was the smoke of cookery; as kind housewives at morning; midday; eventide; were boiling their husbands' kettles; and ever a blue pillar rose up into the air; successively or simultaneously; from each of the nine; saying; as plainly as smoke could say: Such and such a meal is getting ready here。 Not uninteresting! For you have the whole Borough; with all its love…makings and scandal…mongeries; contentions and contentments; as in miniature; and could cover it all with your hat。If; in my wide Way…farings; I had learned to look into the business of the World in its details; here perhaps was the place for combining it into general propositions; and deducing inferences therefrom。
〃Often also could I see the black Tempest marching in anger through the Distance: round some Schreckhorn; as yet grim…blue; would the eddying vapor gather; and there tumultuously eddy; and flow down like a mad witch's hair; till; after a space; it vanished; and; in the clear sunbeam; your Schreckhorn stood smiling grim…white; for the vapor had held snow。 How thou fermentest and elaboratest; in thy great fermenting…vat and laboratory of an Atmosphere; of a World; O Nature!Or what is Nature? Ha! why do I not name thee GOD? Art not thou the 'Living Garment of God'? O Heavens; is it; in very deed; HE; then; that ever speaks through thee; that lives and loves in thee; that lives and loves in me?
〃Fore…shadows; call them rather fore…splendors; of that Truth; and Beginning of Truths; fell mysteriously over my soul。 Sweeter than Dayspring to the Shipwrecked in Nova Zembla; ah; like the mother's voice to her little child that strays bewildered; weeping; in unknown tumults; like soft streamings of celestial music to my too…exasperated heart; came that Evangel。 The Universe is not dead and demoniacal; a charnel…house with spectres; but godlike; and my Father's!
〃With other eyes; too; could I now look upon my fellowman: with an infinite Love; an infinite Pity。 Poor; wandering; wayward man! Art thou not tried; and beaten with stripes; even as I am? Ever; whether thou bear the royal mantle or the beggar's gabardine; art thou not so weary; so heavy…laden; and thy Bed of Rest is but a Grave。 O my Brother; my Brother; why cannot I shelter thee in my bosom; and wipe away all tears from thy eyes!Truly; the din of many…voiced Life; which; in this solitude; with the mind's organ; I could hear; was no longer a maddening discord; but a melting one; like inarticulate cries; and sobbings of a dumb creature; which in the ear of Heaven are prayers。 The poor Earth; with her poor joys; was now my needy Mother; not my cruel Stepdame; Man; with his so mad Wants and so mean Endeavors; had become the dearer to me; and even for his sufferings and his sins; I now first named him Brother。 Thus was I standing in the porch of that '_Sanctuary of Sorrow_;' by strange; steep ways had I too been guided thither; and ere long its sacred gates would open; and the '_Divine Depth of Sorrow_' lie disclosed to me。〃
The Professor says; he here first got eye on the Knot that had been strangling him; and straightway could unfasten it; and was free。 〃A vain interminable controversy;〃 writes he; 〃touching what is at present called Origin of Evil; or some such thing; arises in every soul; since the beginning of the world; and in every soul; that would pass from idle Suffering into actual Endeavoring; must first be put an end to。 The most; in our time; have to go content with a simple; incomplete enough Suppression of this controversy; to a few some Solution of it is indispensable。 In every new era; too; such Solution comes out in different terms; and ever the Solution of the last era has become obsolete; and is found unserviceable。 For it is man's nature to change his Dialect from century to century; he cannot help it though he would。 The authentic _Church…Catechism_ of our present century has not yet fallen into my hands: meanwhile; for my own private behoof I attempt to elucidate the matter so。 Man's Unhappiness; as I construe; comes of his Greatness; it is because there is an Infinite in him; which with all his cunning he cannot quite bury under the Finite。 Will the whole Finance Ministers and Upholsterers and Confectioners of modern Europe undertake; in joint…stock company; to make one Shoeblack HAPPY? They cannot accomplish it; above an hour or two: for the Shoeblack also has a Soul quite other than his Stomach; and would require; if you consider it; for his permanent satisfaction and saturation; simply this allotment; no more; and no less: _God's infinite Universe altogether to himself_; therein to enjoy infinitely; and fill every wish as fast as it rose。 Oceans of Hochheimer; a Throat like that of Oph