第 40 节
作者:美丽心点      更新:2023-05-17 13:23      字数:9321
  who want to call us by our front names。
  〃And the men we have to meet after the show are the worst of all。 The
  stage…door   kind;   and   the   man…   ager's   friends   who   take   us   to   supper   and
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  show their diamonds and talk about seeing 'Dan' and 'Dave' and 'Charlie'
  for us。 They're beasts; and I hate 'em。
  〃I   tell   you;   Lynn;   it's   the   girls   like   us   on   the   stage   that   ought   to   be
  pitied。   It's   girls   from   good   homes   that   are   honestly   ambitious   and   work
  hard   to   rise   in   the   profession;   but   never   do   get   there。 You   bear   a   lot   of
  sympathy sloshed around on chorus girls and their fifteen dollars a week。
  Piffle! There ain't a sorrow in the chorus that a lobster cannot heal。
  〃If there's any tears to shed; let 'em fall for the actress that gets a salary
  of   from  thirty  to   forty…five   dollars   a   week   for taking   a   leading   part in   a
  bum   show。   She   knows   she'll   never   do   any   better;   but   she   hangs   on   for
  years; hoping for the 'chance I that never comes。
  〃And the fool plays we have to work in! Having another girl roll you
  around the stage by the hind legs in a 'Wheelbarrow Chorus' in a musical
  comedy is dignified drama compared with the idiotic things I've had to do
  in the thirty…centers。
  〃But what I hated most was the men  the men leering and blathering
  at   you   across   tables;   trying   to   buy   you   with   Wurzburger   or   Extra   Dry;
  accord… ing to their estimate of your price。 And the men in the audiences;
  clapping;   yelling;   snarling;   crowding;   writhing;   gloating      like   a   lot   of
  wild beasts; with their eyes fixed on you; ready to eat you up if you come
  in reach of their claws。 Oh; how I hate 'em!
  〃Well; I'm not telling you much about myself; am I; Lynn ?
  〃I had two hundred dollars saved up; and I cut the stage the first of the
  summer。 I went over on Long Island and found the sweetest little village
  that ever was; called Soundport; right on the water。 I was going to spend
  the summer there; and study up on elocution; and try to get a class in the
  fall。   There   was   an   old   widow   lady   with   a   cottage   near   the   beach   who
  sometimes rented a room or two just for com… pany; and she took me in。
  She had another boarder; too  the Reverend Arthur Lyle。
  〃Yes; he was the head…liner。 You're on; Lynn。 I'll tell you all of it in a
  minute。 It's only a one…act play。
  〃The first time he walked on; Lynn; I felt myself going; the first lines
  he spoke; he had me。 He was different from the men in audiences。 He was
  tall and slim; and you never heard him come in the room; but you felt him。
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  He had a face like a picture of a knight  like one of that Round Table
  bunch  and a voice like a 'cello solo。 And his manners!
  〃Lynn; if you'd take John Drew in his best draw… ing…room scene and
  compare the two; you'd have John arrested for disturbing the peace。
  〃I'll   spare   you   the particulars;   but   in   less   than   a  month Arthur   and   I
  were   engaged。   He   preached   at   a   little   one…night   stand   of   a   Methodist
  church。 There was to be a parsonage the size of a lunch…wagon; and hens
  and honeysuckles when we were married。 Ar… thur used to preach to me a
  good deal about Heaven; but be never could get my mind quite off those
  honey… suckles and hens。
  〃No; I didn't tell him I'd been on the stage。 I hated the business and all
  that went with it; I'd cut it out forever; and I didn't see any use of stirring
  things up。 I was a good girl; and I didn't have any… thing to confess; except
  being   an   elocutionist;   and   that   was   about   all   the   strain   my   conscience
  would stand。
  〃Oh; I tell you; Lynn; I was happy。 I sang in the choir and attended the
  sewing society; and re… cited that 'Annie Laurie' thing with the whistling
  stunt in it; 'in a manner bordering upon the profes… sional;' as the weekly
  village paper reported it。 And Arthur and I went rowing; and walking in
  the woods;  and clamming;  and that   poky  little village   seemed to   me   the
  best place in the world。 I'd have been happy to live there always; too; if
  〃But one morning old Mrs。 Gurley; the widow lady; got gossipy while
  I   was   helping   her   string   beans   on   the   back   porch;   and   began   to   gush
  information; as folks who rent out their rooms usually do。 Mr。 Lyle was
  her idea of a saint on earth  as he was mine; too。 She went over all his
  virtues and graces; and wound up by telling me that Arthur had had an ex…
  tremely   romantic   love…affair;   not   long   before;   that   had   ended   unhappily。
  She didn't seem to be on to the de… tails; but she knew that he had been hit
  pretty hard。 He was paler and thinner; she said; and he had some kind of a
  remembrance or keepsake of the lady in a little rosewood box that he kept
  locked in his desk drawer in his study。
  〃'Several times;〃 says she; 〃I've seen him gloomerin' over that box of
  evenings; and he always locks it up right away if anybody comes into the
  room。'
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  〃Well;   you   can   imagine   how   long   it   was   before   I   got Arthur   by   the
  wrist and led him down stage and hissed in his ear。
  〃That   same   afternoon   we   were   lazying   around   in   a   boat   among   the
  water…lilies at the edge of the bay。
  〃'Arthur;' says I; 'you never told me you'd had another love…affair。 But
  Mrs。 Gurley did;' I went on; to let him know I knew。 I hate to bear a man
  lie。
  〃' Before you came;' says he; looking me frankly in the eye; 'there was
  a   previous    affection    …  a  strong   one。   Since    you   know    of   it;  I  will  be
  perfectly candid with you。'
  〃'I am waiting;' says I。
  〃'My dear Ida;' says Arthur  of course I went by my real name; while
  I was in Soundport  'this former affection was a spiritual one; in fact。 Al…
  though the lady aroused my deepest sentiments; and was; as I thought; my
  ideal woman; I never met her; and never spoke to her。 It was an ideal love。
  My   love   for   you;   while   no   less   ideal;   is   different。 You   wouldn't   let   that
  come between us。'
  〃'Was she pretty?' i asked。
  〃' She was very beautiful;' said Arthur。
  〃'Did you see her often?' I asked。
  〃' Something like a dozen times;' says he。
  〃'Always from a distance?' says I。
  〃'Always from quite a distance;' says he。
  〃'And you loved her?' I asked。
  〃'She seemed my ideal of beauty and grace  and soul;〃 says Arthur。
  〃'And this keepsake that you keep under lock and key; and moon over
  at times; is that a remembrance from her?'
  〃'A memento;' says Arthur; 'that I have treasured。'
  〃'Did she send it to you?'
  〃'It came to me from her' says be。
  〃'In a roundabout way?' I asked。
  〃'Somewhat roundabout;' says he; 'and yet rather direct。'
  〃'Why didn't you ever meet her?' I asked。 'Were your positions in life
  so different?'
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  〃She was far above me;' says Arthur。 'Now; Ida;' he goes on; 'this is all
  of the past。 You're not going to be jealous; are you?'
  'Jealous!' says I。 'Why; man; what are you talking about? It makes me
  think ten times as much of you as I did before I knew about it。'
  〃And it did; Lynn … if you can understand it。 That ideal love was a new
  one on me; but it struck me as being the most beautiful and glorious thing
  I'd ever heard of。 Think of a man loving a woman he'd never even spoken
  to; and being faithful just to what his mind and heart pictured her! Oh; it
  sounded great to me。 The men I'd always known come at you with either
  diamonds; knock…out…drops or a raise of salary;  and their ideals!  well;
  we'll say no more。〃
  〃Yes; it made me think more of Arthur than I did before。 I couldn't be
  jealous of that far…away divin… ity that he used to worship; for I was going
  to have him myself。 And I began to look upon him as a saint on earth; just
  as old lady Gurley did。
  〃About four o'clock this afternoon a man came to the house for Arthur
  to go and see somebody that was sick among his church bunch。 Old lady
  Gurley was taking her afternoon snore on a couch; so that left me pretty
  much alone。
  〃In passing by Arthur's study I